Chapter 80 Celia #2
“How could it be? This is your destiny,” he said, like he hadn’t wanted to escape this kind of life since I first knew him.
“Maybe it wasn’t. Maybe it’s Caro’s. Maybe I’m stealing that chance from her. What if I’m just a fucking fraud?” I covered my face, too ashamed to fall apart in front of the guys I loved so much.
“Is this because of what that idiot said?” Ronan asked, and I nodded my head.
“I just feel like a sham. Like I fooled everyone. Maybe a long time ago this was my destiny, but what if I’m not meant to be here anymore?” I asked, looking up at him, hoping for some answers.
“Then fake it till you make it sunshine.” Mateo squeezed my shoulder as he whispered in my ear from the other side.
“What?” I choked out, surprised at his response and he shrugged his shoulders.
“No one knows what they are doing. And if they tell you they do they’re fucking lying,” Ronan finished Mateo’s thought.
“I’m drowning in doubt,” I confessed, the tears welling at my eyelids.
“Come back up for air, we can’t save you from yourself,” Ronan lamented, a sad tone in his voice. “I wish you could see what we see. You’re a fucking force to be reckoned with. You’ve survived hell and you’ll survive this too.”
“I wish I believed that. I just have this feeling like—”
“Don’t even fucking say it.” He read my mind, knowing exactly what kind of turmoil was crashing through my mind.
Death.
The end.
I was always thinking about it.
She was my gravity.
The center of my universe.
Everything moved because death allowed it so.
This could only end in death.
This could only end in death.
It was the only way out.
My heart began to race, and I shut my eyes, taking a deep breath in to try to calm myself before the panic set in again.
Not here. Not here.
“What would make you feel better right now?” Mateo’s husky voice honeyed its way out in that way only he could sound, letting me know he was ready to cater to any and all of my needs to anchor me back down to reality.
I looked up at him through my eyelashes.
“Do you want to kill him, sunshine?” he asked, no judgment in his tone at all, just a desire to fulfill my need, whatever it be.
I looked between the three of them, mouth slightly agape at the fact they all had the same expression.
“I think so,” I said quietly nodding my head.
“Find him. Bring him back here.” I heard Santos already on the phone behind me.
Then I heard the deafening boom in the distance and the ground trembled beneath us. We didn’t have to guess or speculate what had happened.
We all already knew.
“Find César, there’s Diablos on standby. Make sure no one is hurt, and get all the civilians out,” I told Mateo. “Find the president, make sure he’s safe,” I told Ronan.
“Come with me.” The last instruction went to Santos, I squeezed my hand around the Glock and the four of us made our way out of the conference room.
Pandemonium had broken out at the gala. Smoke was filling the air fast and people were running through the building, shouting and screaming for each other in a wave of chaos.
He may have been inadequate for all intent and purpose, but my tío had a knack for dramatic murders—I’d give him that.
It would end today though.
Obviously, Fernando had been a distraction, a way to get my tío and his men in the building to fuck this party all to hell and cast a shadow over my name.
He didn’t understand that I was the shadow, the very thing that loomed over the memory of my family’s name.
I was annoyed at myself for not seeing that farce for what it was.
Santos walked in front of me, shielding me from anything that might come towards me in the thick wall of smoke.
“I think we need to get out, Morena, there’s too much smoke,” he yelled over the screams of the crowd rushing towards the doorways to the outside.
Another tremor shook the building, and the rearmost walls began to collapse, bricks cascading into a pile on the ground as Diablos and cártel soldiers worked alongside military police to empty El Palacio and get everyone out safely.
“No. This is our chance. We have to find him,” I told him, my eyes tearing up from the insidious fumes overwhelming me.
He didn’t argue, pushing through the crowd desperate to get out as we forced ourselves in the opposite direction, deeper into the building.
Two girls in their early twenties were huddled together on the floor, coughing and yelling for help. I pointed them out to Santos and we both rushed over to help.
“You need to get out of here. There’s too much smoke, the building is coming down,” I shouted in spanish.
“She’s pinned under the boulder!” One of the girls responded.
Santos and I both reached for the boulder, finding it too impossibly heavy to move.
“Together,” he said, and I nodded. “One, two, three!” We barely lifted it three inches off the ground, but it was just enough for the uninjured girl to pull her friend out from under the rock that had her trapped.
She began wailing, either from the feeling of her foot being free, the pain, or the shock of the entire situation.
Probably all of the above.
“Head towards the exit, find the men in leather,” I told them, pointing towards the crowd.
“You think he’s still inside?” he asked me, one girl over his shoulder and the other clutched to my arm as we helped them towards the exit.