Chapter 9
Chapter Nine
Seth
The heavy, oak doors of Lucian’s office close behind us with a decisive thud, and I move before I can think better of it. My hand closes around Selene’s wrist, spinning her to face me as I back her against the corridor wall.
“Why are you really doing this?” The question comes out harsher than I intend, desperation bleeding through my anger. “If you want to punish me for the things I’ve said, there are better ways. Ways that don’t put you in danger.”
Her blue eyes flash. “This isn’t about you, Seth.”
“You literally just said it was!” My grip tightens on her wrist. “In there, you threw my words back at me—about you being weak, about being useful—”
“And?” She lifts her chin, defiant. “Maybe I want to prove something to myself. Did that occur to you?”
“Bullshit.” I lean closer, crowding her against the stone. “You’re walking back into Zane’s scheme, letting him think he still has a chance—”
“What is your problem?” She tries to yank her wrist free, but I don’t let go. “Why do you suddenly care what I do?”
“I’m trying to protect you!”
“I never asked you to protect me!” The words explode from her, sharp and cutting.
Then, a barrier slams down behind her eyes, and something cold takes over.
“Besides, if we hadn’t marked each other, if it was just the fated mate bond, you’d be more than happy to use me as bait. Don’t pretend otherwise.”
The accusation stings. My wolf snarls in furious denial because she’s wrong—completely wrong.
I’ve been watching over her for months, even when I kept my distance.
Just because I avoided speaking to her didn’t mean I wasn’t tracking her movements across every room, noting who approached her, making sure she was safe.
I would have fought against this plan just as hard before the mate marks.
The fated mate bond has been a constant burn in my chest since the day we met, and no amount of denial could change that.
“You’re wrong,” I growl, the words rough with emotion.
“You think I wouldn’t have fought this before?
I’ve been watching over you since the moment I felt the bond, Selene.
Even when I was keeping my distance.” Helplessness wars with fury in my chest. I release her wrist only to plant both palms against the wall on either side of her head, caging her in.
“What will it take?” My voice drops and sounds raw, almost pleading.
“What will it take for you to believe that I do care about you?”
She meets my gaze steadily, her features relaxing slightly. “I know you care, Seth.”
Relief floods through me.
“But I also know it’s because of the mate bond,” she continues, and the relief shatters. “The marks we gave each other. That’s what’s making you feel this way.”
“It’s not—”
“I have no expectations of you.” Her voice is flat now, carefully neutral. “And you shouldn’t have any of me, either.”
My brow furrows. “What does that mean?”
She shifts under my arms, creating what little space she can between us. “It means I’ll turn a blind eye to your activities, Seth. As long as you leave me alone to mine.” She extricates herself and starts walking away.
The words don’t make sense at first. I stare after her, trying to process what she said. It takes a moment for me to realize what she’s offering. What she’s giving me permission to do. And what she wants to do, too.
Seek a lover.
Rage explodes through me, hot and vicious. I catch up to her in three strides, whirl her around, and slam my mouth onto hers before she can take another step.
She gasps against my lips, her hands flying to my chest—not to push me away but to clutch at my shirt. The kiss is fierce, bruising, my tongue demanding entry as I pour all my frustration and desire into it. When I finally pull back, we’re both breathing hard.
“How dare you,” I growl softly. The scent of her arousal hits me, thick and sweet, making my wolf howl with satisfaction. “How dare you tell me to take a lover when you’re standing here getting wet just from my kiss.”
Her face flushes deep red. “Seth—”
“I haven’t had anyone since you stepped foot in this capital,” I snarl, my hand sliding to the back of her neck, holding her in place. “Since the moment I met you and felt the fated mate bond. Every woman who’s approached me, every offer, every flirtation—I’ve turned them all down because of you.”
Her eyes widen, shock flickering across her features.
“So, don’t you dare tell me to seek someone else.” I lean closer, my lips brushing her ear. “You’re the only woman I want. The only one I’ve wanted for months.”
She trembles against me, and I can smell how much my words affect her. The mate bond sings between us, hot and insistent.
But then, jealousy claws through my chest, sharp and ugly. “Is that why you offered to help with Zane?” The question comes out rough, accusing. “So you can stay close to him? Have you fallen in love with him, Selene?”
The slap cracks across my face before I can register her hand moving. My head snaps to the side, and when I look back at her, her face is flushed with rage and humiliation.
“I’m not so desperate for affection,” she hisses, her voice shaking with emotion, “that I’ll fall for the first man to offer me a few kind words.”
The words hit me harder than the slap. Because I know what she’s really saying: that I drove her to it. That my months of cruelty and rejection left her so starved for kindness that it was easy for Zane to manipulate her. I open my mouth to respond, to apologize, but she’s already pushing me away.
“Let me go,” she demands, her blue eyes blazing.
My hand tightens on her neck, pulling her closer instead.
“If you let him touch you,” I say quietly, deliberately, “if you let Zane lay even one finger on you—a hand on your arm, a brush against your hair, anything”—I lean down and whisper in her ear—“I will spend that whole night making sure you remember exactly who you belong to.”
Her breath hitches. I can feel her pulse racing under my palm, can smell the spike of arousal that floods through her at my words. Her body betrays her completely, even as her mind fights me.
“You wouldn’t—” she starts, but she is too breathless to finish.
“Try me.” I nip at her earlobe, satisfaction coursing through me when she shivers. “Test me, little wolf. See what happens if you come home smelling like another man.”
She shoves hard at my chest, and this time, I let her go. She stumbles back a step, her face flushed, her breathing unsteady. Without another word, she turns and stalks off, her spine rigid with fury.
I lean against the wall, watching her retreat, my body still buzzing with frustrated desire. My wolf paces restlessly, unsatisfied, wanting to chase after her and finish what we started.
But I force myself to stay put.
She’s not unaffected by me—that much is clear. Her body responds to mine; the mate bond pulls at her just as strongly as it pulls at me. But winning her body isn’t the problem. It’s never been the problem.
It’s her heart that I need to reach. Her trust that I need to gain.
And I have no idea how to do that.
“Commander?”
I look up from the stack of reports on my desk to find Theodore, one of my junior officers, hovering in the doorway with a wary expression.
“What is it?”
“Your sister stopped by again, sir. Lady Marina. She said to tell you that if you don’t show up for dinner tonight, she’ll come find you herself.” He shifts uncomfortably. “She seemed quite serious about it.”
I suppress a groan. That’s the third time this week Marina has tried to corner me, and I know exactly why.
I bailed on that blind date she had arranged with Lady Catherine from House Meridian—didn’t even show up, just sent a message claiming urgent military business.
Marina has been hunting me down ever since, no doubt ready to rip me apart for embarrassing the family.
“Tell her I’m busy.”
“I did, sir. She said she doesn’t care.”
Of course she did. I run a hand through my hair, exhaustion weighing on me like armor that’s too heavy.
I’ve been avoiding all my sisters for two weeks now, dodging their summonses and taking alternative routes through the palace to avoid running into them.
I should just tell them about Selene. Get it over with.
Let them know I’m already mated and be done with their matchmaking schemes.
But every time I try to come up with what to say, my brain shuts down.
How do I explain that I’m bound to a woman who can barely stand to be in the same room as me?
That my mate avoids me like I’m carrying the plague?
That I drove her away because of my stupidity and now have no idea how to win her back?
“Fine. Tell her I’ll be there.” The lie comes easily. I won’t go, but it’ll buy me time.
Theodore nods and retreats quickly, probably relieved to escape before I find something to criticize.
Two weeks. It has been two weeks since Selene agreed to help catch Zane, and I’ve spent every second of her meetings with him watching from the shadows.
Guarding her. Making sure nothing happens while she plays this dangerous game.
But the moment those encounters end, she disappears.
Slips away before I can intercept her, taking different routes back to avoid crossing my path.
She won’t even look at me when she arrives. Just walks past wherever I’m stationed—in the gardens one day, the library courtyard the next, the eastern terrace after that—her spine straight and her eyes forward, pretending I don’t exist.
I’ve tried going to her quarters. Knocked on her door late at night when I know she should be there. But she never answers. Just silence on the other side, though I can hear her heartbeat, smell her scent. She’s there. She just won’t open the door for me.