Chapter 18 - Camden
In hindsight, walking out on Flora hadn’t been the best move.
He knew it would trigger her, but he needed to clear his head.
Their conversation hadn’t been a productive one, but it had given him a lot to think about.
His own opinions and emotions were at the forefront of his mind, but hearing Flora’s perspective, as much as he didn’t want to admit it at the time, had been eye-opening.
He knew that her adoptive parents had mistreated her, and that life had been difficult in Silverrose and then Ironbrand, but he hadn’t given enough thought to how alone she must have felt all those years.
The abuse she had suffered was obviously traumatic, but the bullying and teasing at the hands of his friends—and, regrettably, himself—had been isolating.
She had never had anyone to count on—except him.
And then he had taken that away from her, just when she’d needed him the most. Not only had he taken her virginity, but he had rejected her and then left the pack.
He hadn’t claimed her publicly, as he should have done.
His friends’ opinions had meant more to him than her feelings, and he had allowed their influence to make him feel ashamed of her when he should have been proud that a woman like Flora had given him her heart.
His love had been shallow, even though she had trusted him with everything that night.
Even if she had wanted to tell him about the pregnancy, he realized she would have had no way of doing so. He had left her without a way of communicating with him and had never looked back.
He cursed, thinking of all the mistakes he’d made when they were young and the errors he continued to make now that he had found her again.
Ever since he had taken her away from Alpha Sier and brought her to Silverrose, he had tried to make up for his behavior, but he realized now that he had barely scratched the surface of what was required to earn her trust. If he was honest with himself, he was lucky that she hadn’t stolen everything from him while he slept and run away.
He deserved that kind of treatment, but she’d stayed.
She’d married him, cared for him, and allowed herself to be intimate with him when he didn’t deserve it. He didn’t deserve her.
The secret about Sofia had crushed him, but now that he was away from the house, he realized how smart Flora had been to protect their daughter.
After how he had treated her, it was no wonder that she was afraid he would abandon her once again.
With Sofia in the mix, it only made sense to protect her from the same kind of pain.
To be abandoned by a lover was one thing; to be discarded by a parent was another.
Flora knew what that pain felt like, and she had done everything she needed to do to make sure Sofia didn’t suffer the same fate.
“I’ve been a fool,” he muttered to himself as he walked down the street.
He hadn’t left the house with any kind of plan.
After asking Jasper to keep a close watch on the girls in his absence, he wandered aimlessly, sifting through his thoughts until they made a semblance of sense.
His conclusion now was that he would have made the same choices Flora had if he’d been in her shoes, but that Flora was a much stronger person than he ever would be.
Her determination and ability to persevere through the worst kinds of betrayals were beyond his comprehension.
For her to even think about opening her heart to him again after what he had done showed that she was a more forgiving person than he could ever hope to be.
All he could do now was keep her and their daughter safe, both from the Ironbrand wolves and from the worst parts of himself. He would never abandon either of them again.
What he needed now was a project, something he could do to improve things. With the destruction from last night, there was plenty of that to go around.
“You again,” Harold said as Camden stopped in front of the pack house. “I already told you that I’m going to double the patrols. Or did your human mate cause another problem that you want me to fix?”
Camden gritted his teeth at his uncle’s last comment.
After hearing from Flora firsthand about her experiences, each barb sent her way made the pain of what he had done to her cut even deeper.
He had perpetuated the problem for years, ignoring the consequences, and now all of it was staring him straight in the face.
“There are no more problems,” he said. “I’m here to offer my help, as promised.”
Harold’s demeanor changed at once. “In that case, come with me.”
They went into the alpha’s office and began to plan routes and tasks for the warriors of the pack, ensuring that no area was left uncovered.
Camden was impressed with the planning his uncle had already done and his willingness to increase the effort everyone was giving in light of their current situation.
The only thing that continued to bother him was that his views on a woman’s place were interfering with the running of the pack.
It took two hours for Camden to convince him that the women his squad had trained were ready and willing to contribute to the daily patrols.
When they were finally done discussing it, his nerves were frayed.
“I expect you back here tomorrow to talk about plans for rebuilding the destroyed areas of the town,” Harold said as Camden made to leave.
“Of course,” he agreed. “I’ll be here.”
The day had been tiring in more ways than one, and Camden was relieved to leave the pack house.
He started walking toward home, but as he approached the house, he knew he wasn’t ready to face Flora just yet.
Before he could have a conversation with her about what had transpired, he needed to de-stress a little bit, so he continued his course past the house, heading for the forest.
The trees creaked in the wind as he transformed into his wolf form, claws bursting through his skin as he grew light blond fur all over his body.
His spine straightened, and his limbs snapped into place as all four paws hit the ground at a run.
Camden remembered his first transformation, how painful it had been, and how scared he was, not knowing how to control it.
The change had become second nature now, a seamless transition from one version of himself into another.
By the time he finished his run, he was out of breath. The forest was calming and peaceful as he turned back into a man and walked steadily up the path that would lead him home, but when he was close enough to see the house, something startled him: a noise in the trees above.
Camden crouched down, readying himself for danger as he surveyed the swaying limbs overhead. He headed toward the noise, expecting to see another interloper from the Ironbrand pack, only to find Flora sitting on a branch almost twenty feet above his head.
“What are you doing up there?” he asked, perplexed by the sight. In all the time he had known her, he had never considered tree-climbing to be a hobby of hers. “How did you get up there?”
“I climbed,” she said simply.
“But why?”
“I do it sometimes, when I need to feel…alive,” she replied. Although she’d hesitated with some of her answers, her voice still sounded clear. To Camden, it sounded like she was doing her best to be honest and forthright, even if she didn’t want to share the answers.
“That makes sense,” Camden said. “But I meant why now? Why this tree?”
“I was waiting for you.”
There was no hesitation in that answer.
“Why were you waiting for me?” Camden was craning his neck to see her, now standing directly under her position on the high branch above.
“Because after you left this morning, Jasper came and talked to me. He made me think about how I’ve been acting since I came back to Silverrose, so I came up in this tree to think.
It’s something I’ve done off and on when I need to shock my system a little bit.
” She grinned. “I know wolves have stronger abilities than us humans, but for me, there is nothing like being two stories up in the air to realign my priorities.”
“Did it help?” Camden asked. She was opening up now, and he was afraid to say anything that would stop her from continuing.
“Immensely,” she replied. “I realized that I have been living in fear for so long that I hardly know how else to exist. I’ve been afraid of having feelings that are out of my control; afraid that you would hurt me again, afraid that you would reject Sofia.
So, I did what I’ve always done. I made decisions for myself and Sofia with no regard for how it would affect other people. No regard to how it would affect you.”
Her eyes were glistening now, and Camden could see how much effort she was putting into her words. He nodded, letting her know he was still listening. He wasn’t going anywhere.
“I’ve been burying my emotions and desires for my whole life, Camden, but living like that doesn’t serve me anymore.
It took me this long to realize it, but I’ve trusted you for weeks.
I just didn’t allow myself to give in to that feeling, because my fear had taken over everything in my mind.
But I don’t want to live like that anymore. ”
“I don’t want you to feel like you need to be afraid,” Camden agreed. “I want to be someone you can trust to carry you. Someone you know will catch you if you fall.”
Flora nodded, and then a smile crept across her face. “I trust you,” she said.
Her voice wasn’t hesitant or quiet now. The statement was loud, sure, and strong.
Without another word, Flora leaned away from the trunk of the tree, allowing herself to fall off the tree branch above.
She fell forward in slow motion, her face peaceful and serene as her eyes fixed on Camden.
As she fell further, she twisted her body slightly, angling herself to allow Camden to catch her.
He reached out effortlessly, putting one arm behind her back and the other under her knees to cradle her.
Flora exhaled hard as the force of her body was stopped by Camden’s powerful arms. She smiled, her face inches away from his.
“How was that for a trust fall?” she teased.
“Perfection,” Camden replied.