20. Shut Up and Knot Me
Chapter twenty
Shut Up and Knot Me
I tried to remain calm as Derek dropped the mother of all bombshells. I can’t say I was shocked, though. Surprised? Certainly. The way she acted around him, how she touched him with such familiarity said enough that the two had history. It’s safe to say that she was the toxic ex that Derek pretty much despised. That worked out in my favor, but that still left me with burning questions, ones I didn’t know if I wanted the answer or not.
I waited for him to continue, but he said nothing, his eyes searching my face. He probably thought I would be angry or hurt that he hadn’t told me something like this until now. Normally, that’s exactly what I would do, but all that anger and hurt was expelled yelling at Satan’s spawn in a sun dress.
It also doesn’t hurt that there are things that people just keep close to their chest for fear of another’s reaction. It’s human nature. I can’t fault him for not telling me, although the hurt is still there. But with the way he looked at me, filled with so much love and adoration, and the utter look of disgust on his face when seeing Mina, I felt more at ease.
I smiled at him, hoping that it would convey that I wasn’t about to explode. He gave a sigh, his wide shoulders slumping after being tense during the whole exchange. Suddenly grabbing my shirt and pulling me into a crushing embrace, Derek just kept me close to his chest, rubbing soothing circles along my back. It felt like our roles should’ve been reversed. I should’ve been the one to rub his back.
“I’m so glad you’re not mad. I can’t believe she came over here and harassed you…”
“Yeah, it was kind of an unwelcomed surprise, but I think I handled it as well as could be expected.” He arched a dark eyebrow, mirth dancing in his eyes.
“I wouldn’t call me holding you back ‘handling it well’.” He chuckled as I pinched his side, finally letting me go enough to where I could settle myself against his side on the couch. I didn’t want to dwell on the issue, but if I didn’t let out the nagging thought, it may become a bigger issue later on.
“Derek…” He sobered up as I said his first name, something I seldom did these days. I powered through, not wanting to lose the momentum. “I wish you would’ve told me after she came to your office.” He winced.
“Yeah, that would’ve been a good time to tell you, but I didn’t want you to worry that something was still going on between us.” I shook my head, resting my head on his chest, the strong beat of his heart soothing me.
“After what I’ve seen today, not a chance in hell. Did things between you really end that badly?” My jaw shut with an audible click, my face turning to see his reaction. He simply patted my head and kissed me on my head once I settled back against him.
“I guess I should try and finish the story, huh?”
“That would be nice, unless your intention was being a tease.” Derek barked out a laugh, lightly slapping my ass and rubbing it after to ease the sting away.
“Fair enough. I guess I should start at the beginning then…”
Derek had first met Yasmina through one of Dimitri’s friends. At first, she seemed to be the definition of a Lady, and Derek was infatuated with her. It wasn’t only until they officially started dating that Yasmina showed her true self. She became manipulative, possessive, and cruel, telling Derek he was fat and that he was lucky to have an Omega like her in his life.
Her words were poison, but they had the desired effect. He enrolled in a gym and sometimes fasted to try to lose as much weight as possible. Once Yasmina molded Derek into an acceptable image, she controlled almost every aspect of his life, and Derek willingly went along with it.
Eventually, Derek proposed, despite the warnings from his friends and family. He truly thought of her as the love of his life and that she wanted what was best for him.
Until she broke off the engagement to run off with another Alpha who had more money and status.
I didn’t think it was possible to hate someone more than you already did, but I could feel the absolute loathing that I felt toward her. If I ever saw her again, I doubt I could keep all the indignation and fury in check.
Were I to call Derek, it would be to help me hide a body. No doubt about it.
“So why is she coming around her throwing herself at you?”
“Well, the Alpha she left me for broke things off with her to marry a young heiress, believe it or not.”
Wow, talk about poetic justice.
“I still don’t understand. Why does she think it’s okay for her to just sashay her way back into your life, despite having a partner?”
“Well…” Derek was unable to meet my eyes, no matter how much I tried to maneuver my face into his line of sight. “It’s complicated.”
“If you explain it in simple terms, it will no longer be complicated. Problem solved!” I knew I was starting to act like a brat, but right now, I needed answers, not for Derek to start dancing around the question. If there’s one thing I learned from our recent troubles, it’s that communication is very important, as is patience.
I settled against the couch with my arms folded, the epitome of an irate Omega fully committed to playing the waiting game.
“Well, it’s probably because we haven’t been claimed yet, officially.”
“Officially? I thought we were practically married at this point?”
“We are! I guess officially is the wrong word for it. It’s more of an unspoken rule? You know when you go to a public restroom and guys leave an empty urinal between them? It’s kind of like that.”
“Ah, so there’s some traditions in the Alpha and Omega communities that the general populace doesn’t know about?” When he put it that way, it sort of made more sense.
“Exactly! I’m surprised that they didn’t go over the Claiming with you. Some families take it very seriously.” I could tell that he put an emphasis on the word Claiming , which made my ignorance even more apparent. How could I have not heard of it till now?
“Well, can you give me a short summary at least?” Note to self; look up claiming should Derek’s explanation turned out to be… subpar.
“Sure. Can’t believe I’m giving you The Talk .“ A solid smack to the chest had him chuckling, but quickly sobered as he adopted a pondering look, likely wondering where to start.
“The Claiming is what really matters to secondary genders like us. Not marriage, although being legally married has its own appeal. To be claimed lets everyone know on an instinctual level that you are off the market and to not even bother. Your scent would be mingled with that of your partners.
“It’s also beneficial. Omegas go through heats less frequently, and Alphas no longer feel the primal need to find an Omega. With me so far?” I nodded. I read a copious amount of literature for the romantically inclined, and it was a common trope for fated mates or bonding to be a thing.
“Of course, it’s like the mating bond between werewolves. Well, in the books, at least.”
“Sort of, but I’m not gonna turn into a wolf anytime soon.” I gave him a flat look.
“Have you seen the amount of body hair you have? You’re halfway there already.“ He gave me an almost feral grin.
“Oh yeah?” he said, before pushing me down and covering me with his body. “I’m pretty sure werewolves are insatiable beasts that love to ravage their mates with their knots.” He chuckled at my surprised expression.
“Don’t think I haven’t taken a peek at some of the books you buy. Your bookshelf is filthy , but also a good source for inspiration when I want to try something new,“ he said, giving me some playful nips along my neck. The nips were a welcome distraction, but since we were on the topic of knotting...
“Derek, how come you’ve never knotted me?” He froze like a deer in headlights, his breath tickling my throat the only indicator that he wasn’t a living statue.
“Why are you asking me that all of a sudden?” He resumed kissing my neck, one of his hands sliding underneath me to play with my ass. He was likely trying to distract me, and normally it would’ve worked. Not this time.
I pushed him off me—well, tried to. In the end, Derek relented and sat up, a wounded look on his face.
“What, what’s wrong?”
“You can’t be serious. I asked you why you won’t knot me, and you dodged the question. Quite sloppily, I may add.”
“Are you fu--” He took a deep breath, exhaling slowly and repeating the process a few more times before meeting my eyes.
“What’s this really about? Because not to toot my own horn, but I think I’m a generous lover. Magnanimous, some might even say,” Damn. Try as I might, I couldn’t help the smirk from showing on my face. “If I knot you, there’s a good chance you could end up pregnant, and I thought we both agreed that now isn’t the right time. You got school, and I still have a stupid ass lawsuit to deal with.” He bit his lip, looking hesitant. “
“Plus, I want you all to myself for a little while longer...” Well, that admission had my chest all aflutter, and the feeling was mutual, but if there’s one thing reading copious amount of smu—romance, it’s that cosmic bonds that span across time and space needs some kind of catalyst.
“Tell me knotting isn’t at all related to Claiming, and I’ll drop it. I swear.”
I waited with bated breath, hoping he would tell me I was wrong, that there was still something I didn’t realize when it came to the process of Claiming. How did it work? What if you fell out of love with the one you bonded with? Was that it? Were you stuck in a relationship neither of you no longer wanted to be in?
“...fuck,” he whispered.
I closed my eyes, trying to will the tears to stay away. There had to be a reason he hadn’t claimed me, right? Do they not make condoms especially made for Alphas? I quickly ruled that out, though, given the amount of spunk that leaks out after one of our couplings.
Is releasing his seed inside and knotting the only way?
Can you not claim someone if you have a deep emotional connection?
D- Did he not claim me because I’m a recessive Omega?
I violently shook my head, trying to dislodge the last toxic thought before it got comfortable and stayed there.
Derek must have perceived the motion as something else though, because he held my head between his hands in a strong and yet gentle grip.
“Do you want my knot tonight?”
“I-- what?”
“Do. You. Want. My knot.” It suddenly got very hard to swallow, but I managed it in the end. Derek’s eyes tracked the movement, his tongue darting out to wet his lips. Was this really happening?
“You’re not afraid of claiming a recessive Omega?”
“ Don’t . Don’t let her words poison your mind. In case you forgot, we met through OPS, and their files are very thorough. They added that little tidbit in there, but I told them that I didn’t care. Since I’m a dominant Alpha, I figured we cancel each other out,“ he said with a shrug, as if it was the simplest logic in the world. And maybe it was.
Wasn’t I just asking him to knot me not even a minute ago? Why was I the one getting cold feet all of a sudden?
“What happens to those who no longer want to be bonded? Is there a way to… reverse it?” Now, I never claimed to be very bright, and yes, asking was the height of foolishness, but I needed to make sure that it wasn’t permanent.
Both for Derek’s sake as well as my own.
“It doesn’t matter. At the risk of sounding like a psychopath, you’re stuck with me. I’m not letting you go.”
“ Please.”
He studied me for a few moments before relenting, a muscle working in his jaw.
“It’s a messy process involving isolation and forbidden contact. Your body will go through symptoms similar to withdrawal. It’s like an addiction, and you have to wean yourself off before you can get better,” he said, before standing up suddenly, only to kneel down in front of me.
“Damon Dreyfus, you’re a light in my light that I desperately needed. It was wrong of me to assume that you would share my predilections about marriage or claiming, and I’m sorry. I should have taken into consideration that you want to experience all those big moments in life since you missed out on a lot of firsts growing up the way you did. If you’ll have me, I want to be the one to experience all of those firsts with you.”
Oh. Oh shit. He wasn’t just kneeling to be at eye level with me, he was kneeling .
“I want to be there to hold you when you’re feeling down, the one you go to tell me about your day. I want you to trust me to catch you whenever you feel yourself falling. I want you . If you put your faith in me, I promise I won’t let you down.
“Damon Dreyfus, will you marry me?”
I tackled him, claiming his mouth like my life depended on it. Word could not express the pure, unadulterated joy I felt right then.
“Yes! Derek Dreyfus, I will marry you. I’ll also take your knot if that’s still on the table?”
“Oh baby, once knotting is on the table, it becomes a permanent fixture.” His face broke out into a wide grin, his hands going back to groping my ass, his hands wide enough to damn near cup a cheek in each hand.
“I’ve been wanting to knot you since the first night I met you.”
“Really? Why didn’t you?”
“I wanted to give you the choice. Claiming is not something to be taken lightly. Plus…” He rubbed the back of his neck, cheeks going red before looking at me with a shy gaze.
“I wanted to make sure you wouldn’t break my heart.” Unbidden, my hands flew to my chest. I usually find Derek handsome, cute, hot, typical adjectives used to describe good-looking alphas. But I have never seen him look so adorable until now.
“I won’t break your heart, I promise.” I thanked whatever cosmic force out there that I was lucky to have Derek in my life. I couldn’t even imagine falling in love with another Alpha.
Derek grabbed me by my neck, his hand clamping on the back of my head and pulled me down for a kiss, the hard length of him feeling like a steel rod underneath me.
“You ready for my knot?” he asked, placing a smack on my ass hard enough to sting. I could feel myself getting slicker by the minute. I began rocking my hips against him, relishing the friction caused by our clothes. The prospect of getting knotted had me almost buzzing with energy, my whole twitching in anticipation.
“Please, I want your knot.”
“Mmm, I love it when you beg. Do it again.” This was a total shift from the sweet and tender moment from a couple of seconds ago, but it was also very hot. Derek is naturally dominant, but I’ve never seen him act this way to this extent. I shivered, imagination running wild with all the things he could possibly do to me.
“Are you okay? You need me to stop?” Apparently, Derek interpreted my shiver quite differently. I shook my head, running my fingers through his beard and placing his glasses on the table by the couch.
“No, keep going. I was getting into it.” He was still looking kind of hesitant, so I whispered right into his ear something he would never have expected me to say.
“I want you to fill my hole with your load.”
Derek exploded into motion underneath me, gathering me in his arms and throwing me down on the couch. He ripped his shirt off and discarded it behind him without a second glance. When he unbuttoned his pants and pulled everything down in one swift motion, pants and boxers both, his cock pointed to the sky in all its glory.
It looked… angry. His cock was a shade of red that you usually associate with embarrassment or anger, the veins along his shaft pulsing with his heartbeat. A bead of pre-come gathered at his tip and I swallowed. Before I could ask him if he was okay, he grabbed my legs and forcefully contorted my body so that my feet were bracketing my head.
With one hand holding my ankles in place, he used the other to pull my own pants up so that they gathered around my ankles. The head of his cock was brushing up against my hole, but he didn’t move any further. Even in the throes of ecstasy, he was holding himself back, making sure this was what I wanted.
“Go ahead, I’m all yours.”
The words barely left my mouth before he slammed into me, filling me up until he sunk himself inside me to the base all in one go. I cried out in both pain and pleasure, the sudden forced entry burning my insides, but the empty feeling satisfied now that Derek was penetrating me.
“Say it again,” he said in a husky voice. He pulled out until the tip was barely at my entrance, the feeling causing exquisite agony. I wanted him to take me hard and fast. Moving so slowly that I felt every inch moving inside me was torture in its own way.
“I’m all yours.”
“ Fuck “, he said, before slamming back into me. Derek began a slow yet steady pace, pumping inside me, each thrust just barely grazing my prostate and making me go wild.
“Take my pants off.” I liked the thought of being restrained, but right now, they were just in the way.
He obliged, pulling my pants off each leg one by one before tossing it over his shoulder, my jeans likely ending up in the same stop his shirt was. Legs now free of their restraints, he rearranged my body so that my legs bracketed his waist.
I didn’t think it was possible, but he somehow pushed in even further. With one hand free now that my legs were no longer above my head, he grabbed my own painfully erect cock and began to stroke it in time with his own thrusts. My eyes rolled to the back of my head. It was so good I could barely think straight.
It wasn’t long before I was shooting my load all over myself, painting my stomach and eliciting a growl from Derek. He began to move faster, his cock entering me like a piston while his hand milked me for every last drop I had.
“Oh fuck, the way your hole clenches around my cock when you come feels amazing.”
He grabbed my shirt and began to wipe the mess I made on my stomach, tossing yet another article of clothing away before hoisting me into the air. My legs wrapped around his waist for support while making his way to the bedroom.
He stumbled about halfway down the hall, falling to one knee but cradling my body against his. He was breathing heavily, unable to catch his breath.
“Derek? What’s wrong?”
“Sorry, almost came,” he said in between breaths. He gently rested on his haunches, still holding me in the air. Being in a perfect position, I took the initiative to start riding him, my nails raking down his back. The moans that escaped from him had me grinning in satisfaction.
In the midst of riding him, he suddenly locked his arms around me and groaned in my ear, the warmth of his seed flooding my hole. It seemed to be more than usual, a lot more.
Suddenly, it felt like Derek was growing inside me, the base of his cock growing until it felt like my rim was about to tear itself apart.
He did it. He knotted me.
“Sorry I didn’t last long,” he said, gently picking me up and stumbling into the bedroom before gently settling us on the bed, my body lying on top of his. I shook my head and kissed him gently, wrapped in post-orgasm bliss to do more than that.
“Don’t be, I loved it. I love you .“ My love confession had Derek plastering a goofy grin on his face. He leaned forward to plant a kiss on my forehead before leaning back down and letting out a contented sigh. We stayed like that for a bit, content to hold each other. My heart felt full to bursting, I was so happy!
It wasn’t until ten minutes had passed that I tried to move, only to let out a hiss of pain. Derek grunted underneath me, likely because I just tried to unplug my hole.
“Um, how long does knotting usually last?” I doubt that I was heavy enough to cause any great discomfort for Derek, but I would rather be in a more comfortable position.
“It usually lasts about thirty to forty-five minutes…”
“Oh, that’s not—“
“But this one may last longer. It’s been a while since I’ve knotted someone, and I don’t feel it going down anytime soon.”
I chose to ignore the part where he admitted to knotted someone before, as the only person I could think of who he would have knotted—and therefore bond himself to—would be Yasmina. She was the last person that I wanted to think about right now.
“I’ve only knotted one other person besides you, in case you were wondering.”
“I wasn’t, but thanks for telling me.” How the hell did he know what I was thinking? He snorted, letting me get away with the white lie for the time being. At least it confirmed my suspicions and assuaged my fears somewhat. With knotting and claiming inherently linked as they are, I can’t image Derek or any Alpha knotting people left and right.
Well, I hoped so. I needed to look that up to see if that was some kind of kink.
Derek’s knot ended up taking about an hour to swell down to the point where he could extract himself. Having him inside me for so long only to no longer be there had my hole spasming, opening and closing, and feeling like I was about to come again, strangely enough.
“What does the bond feel like? Is there any noticeable effect?” He was quiet for a while, and I was content to wait so that he could gather his thoughts. I closed my eyes for what felt like a few moments, only to be jostled awake as Derek was shaking my shoulders.
“Sorry, baby. I should have just let you sleep. Do you still want to know what bonding is like, or would you rather wait to experience it yourself?”
“S’okay, I’ll wait.” The question only stemmed from curiosity mostly, but in the end I’ll have a first-hand experience now. A single tear made its way down my cheek before gently being wiped away by Derek’s thumb. I didn’t know whether it was hormones, my sheltered upbringing, or just biological instincts programmed into my DNA, but it felt like I finally accomplished something I was put on this world to do.
It was a weird experience, to be sure, but it was the only way I could explain it currently. As an Omega, the pressure to find an Alpha was almost overpowering, but despite the odds, I found someone to love and have the sentiment returned wholeheartedly. I caressed my stomach, wondering what it would be like to carry a human being inside me.
Derek made a great point earlier. Despite being a recessive Omega, which was a rare case, Derek was a dominant Alpha. Dominant Alphas were just as rare, maybe even rarer. Despite the odds, there might be a chance that I can give Derek a family I know he wants deep down.
As I thought about a possible future for us, I snuggled against Derek as my mind slowly drifted away. My dreams were filled with children who had my silver hair but Derek’s emerald eyes.