Chapter 33 James
James
“What?” she says, stunned.
And I know, right away, that she didn’t do it.
Relief leaves me almost unsteady in its wake, and no part of me recovers quickly enough. My heart is pounding so hard it’s
painful and distracting and I hate it. Five minutes alone with this girl and my body is wrecked. My pulse can’t decide whether
to speed up or stop altogether.
“James,” says Rosabelle, the shock in her voice giving way to panic. “What’s going on? Is the vial missing?”
But I can hardly speak.
I’m feverish with unspent energy, my body holding so tight I’m afraid to move. Frustration and need are choking me. It’s an
effort to keep steady. It’s an effort even to look at her right now. “When Nazeera gets back here,” I force out, “I need you
to go back to the house.”
“James—”
“I’m serious, Rosabelle. You need to go into hiding and stay put or you’re going to make everything worse—”
“Tell me what’s happening.”
I straighten at the sound of her voice. Rosabelle has gone sharp as an arrow. She looks suddenly lethal, her anger material—and
this does nothing to calm me down.
In fact, it reignites my fury.
“I can’t tell you what’s happening,” I hit back. “You’re not entitled to privileged information.”
She steels herself, her chin lifting as she matches my temper. “Don’t do this,” she says. “Don’t make this mistake. You don’t
understand the risks—”
“Oh, really? And whose fault is that? You’ve never bothered sharing the risks—”
“I tried,” she argues. “I tried to tell you back at the house but you insisted on taking me to the diner—”
“I was trying to take care of you!”
“I’m trying to take care of you!” she shouts back, a tremor moving through her right arm. “But I can’t do that if you don’t tell me what’s going on.”
“What the hell is that supposed to mean?”
“There’s no time to discuss it anymore,” she says. “Right now I just need to know—”
“Why do you never listen to me? Just once I’d love for you to listen to me without arguing—”
“Stop,” Rosabelle says forcefully. “I need to know whether the vial is still in your family’s possession.”
“That’s none of your business.”
Her eyes flash with cold anger. “We’re out of time,” she says darkly. “And I’m losing my patience with you.”
Those words seem ominous.
I move without thinking, closing the distance between us in a few strides. She takes a sharp breath, stumbling a few steps as I approach, her back nearly meeting the wall. We’re suddenly separated by inches. Her skin is like glass in the moonlight. Her lips are soft and full, slightly parted.
I feel unstable as I look at her. My head is dangerously overheated. My body never lost its fire. My heart never stopped racing
in my chest.
“Rosabelle,” I say quietly. “Are you threatening me?”
Her breathing is shallow. “Yes,” she exhales.
“Do you really think that’s a good idea?”
Her eyes nearly close. I’m practically shaking from the effort not to touch her.
“I don’t know,” she says.
My head is half steam, my heart battering my ribs. Standing this close to her is making me lose focus. I can’t remember what
we’re talking about. I want to pin her to the wall. I’ve been dreaming of moments like this. Dying for a chance to get her
alone, to sort out this damage in my heart, this heat in my veins, but we’ve never had a chance, there’s never been time—
Rosabelle lifts her hands to my chest and I exhale sharply, surprised, my rigid body turning suddenly to stone. I don’t even
have a chance to process this before she drags her hands slowly down my torso, her fingers curling into my shirt. A shock
of pleasure drives the air from my lungs. I don’t know what we’re doing anymore.
I can’t tell if she’s trying to pull me in or push me away.
“James,” she whispers, and the word is desperate.
The sound of her voice unhinges something inside of me, injecting a torrent of heat into my blood that kills the last of my common sense.
Every reckless, irresponsible thought I’ve ever had about her suddenly seems like a good idea.
Stripping her slowly suddenly seems like a good idea.
Falling to my knees right here in the middle of this diner suddenly seems like the best idea I’ve had in years.
I find her waist in the darkness and she gasps as I draw her close, her hands lifting automatically toward my neck, and I hear the tremor in my own breath, my heart chaotic.
Her eyes are dilated in the half dark, her hair gleaming like liquid silver against my hands.
She looks as far gone as I am. I drag my hands down her back, sealing our bodies together, and I can feel everything through her thin clothes—every soft curve meeting every inch of my hardened body—and the pleasure is so intense it’s nearly blinding. Her head falls back on a soft moan.
That sound sinks teeth into me, becomes a part of me.
“Rosabelle,” I say, my voice in shreds. “Tell me what you’re thinking.”
“I can’t,” she says, her breath catching. “I can’t think when you’re this close. No one has ever— This is— You don’t understand
what you do to me—”
“Help me understand.” I push up slowly under her shirt, my hands gliding against the satin skin of her back, and she cries
out again, and I feel like I’m going insane.
“I’ve never—I’ve never—” She gasps. “I don’t know how to— James—”
I press my face to her throat, my lips grazing her pulse, and I breathe her in like an addict, my head hot and drunk.
She whimpers as I skate my nose along the nape of her neck, and then I taste her there, my tongue hot against her skin, and she makes a sound like a stifled sob, the impact branding my bones.
“James,” she says, sounding almost panicked. “James—”
I’m out of my mind.
I’m already worried I’ll never get enough of this. I’m already worried I’ll always need more. I want her naked in this moonlight.
I want to lay her down under the stars. I want to feel the wind on my back when I make her scream. I can’t fucking breathe.
“Answer me,” I say, pressing the words against her throat. Her hands are caught between us, inching dangerously down the front
of my body, and I can feel myself shaking, muscles taut with impossible tension. “Tell me what you want from me. What do you
want right now?”
She lifts her head like she might be dreaming, blinking up at me in the glaze of starlight, her eyes half-lidded with desire.
I nearly kiss her right then. I’ve clenched her shirt in my fist like I’m fighting for my life. I can’t form a single coherent
thought beyond this annihilating need to taste more of her. All of her. But her expression softens the longer she searches
my face, and, slowly, the haze clears from her eyes. “I want to protect you,” she says softly. “I want to keep you safe.”
The breath that leaves my body is so complete it rocks the foundations of who I am.
This fucking kills me.
“Rosabelle—”
She moves back a step and I follow blindly, listening as her heels hit the baseboard. Then she turns us, trading places so I’m the one backed up against the wall.
I’m breathing hard. Confused. “What— What are you—”
She pushes up the hem of my shirt, exposing my upper body, and the cool night air on my chest leaves me almost disoriented.
I feel wasted. Drugged out of my mind. The ghostly moonlight and surreal texture of the dark make this all feel impossible,
and when her fingers slide against my bare skin, I think I’m dreaming.
I’m lightheaded, rigid and straining for control.
She keeps her hands on me as she brings her face to my torso, and I feel her warm breath, her silken mouth skimming ridges
of muscle. “Fuck,” I gasp. “Rosabelle—”
My heart is beating out of my body.
Her hands glide up my chest; her nose grazes my ribs, her lips a whisper. I inhale sharply as she rests her soft cheek against
my wild, beating heart, and then, just when I think I might lose my fucking mind, she turns her face, pressing a tender kiss
just above my rib cage.
I think maybe I could die from this. Just this.
When she draws back I feel like I’ve been shot. I can’t even move right away. I don’t know what just happened to me. It takes
a full second for my mind to catch up to my body, and when it does I feel volcanic, desperate like I’ve never been in my life.
I catch her in my arms, turning her around—
Nazeera bursts back into the diner, the bell ringing ominously as the door slams open.