Chapter 16
Carter
Mom: Everything is fine here.
Fine.
Nothing is ever really fine, but if I go there to find out, it’ll just make it worse. She begged me not to go home today, but I hate that she won’t tell me if he hurts her. She’ll hide it and sweep it under the rug with all the other dirty family secrets.
Gentry flies down the steps of our basement, and tosses his bag down, then plummets face first into his bed.
I’m lying on my bed next to his, tossing the stress ball I stole from Hines up toward the ceiling. Whistling a tune I had stuck in my head since earlier. The guys are setting up for a party, and it sounds like a stampede running through the kitchen above us.
“Why are you in such a good mood?” Gentry peeks out from his pillow to look at me.
“I’m not.” I wasn’t in the best mood, but oddly, getting a taste of Willa and then jerking off took away a lot of that stress I was holding onto. It was either that or talking to her about it. Getting it off my chest, and her giving me support, would make me feel better.
Nah, it was definitely her pussy.
“Whatever.” Gentry rolls onto his back. “Romy still won’t talk to me.”
It’s been on and off with his ex, Romy, since his first year here.
“Probably because you fucked someone else and got caught with your pants down,” I state.
Gentry lifts and quickly throws a ball from his nightstand, knocking mine out midair.
“Fuck you, I didn’t fuck that girl.” He sits up with his head in his hands. “I know I didn’t.”
We all saw it. At least we saw Romy angrily running away while Gentry chased her, trying to keep his pants up. A puck bunny came waltzing out of his room after him. Romy yelled about trusting him, while Gentry swore he had no idea what happened.
It’s one of the few reasons he let me move into the basement with him. He doesn’t trust anyone or himself to be alone down here.
“I believe you.” Sort of. It wouldn’t be the first time he’s been caught cheating, but that time he admitted it. “But she doesn’t.”
“Sometimes I wonder why I’m friends with you,” he mutters to himself and moves around the room to get changed. It seems he’s not joining the party upstairs either.
That gets me thinking. I’ve never thought of Gentry as my friend. Heck, my team is supposed to be my family, but in my world, family is a group of dysfunctional people that fight and hate each other with the rare exception.
Gentry is the closest thing I have to a friend, besides Willa.
“Are we really friends?” I ask, just as he shuts his light off.
“Uh, yeah. I guess,” he grumbles. “I don’t know. I don’t have many friends. No one I really confide in, but you’re my roommate. I think that means there’s a certain roommate code for what’s said in this room, stays in this room.”
“Good,” I agree with him.
After a bout of silence, I come out with what I want to say. I don’t know if I fully trust Gentry, but I need to talk this shit out, and he’s not one for gossip. “I had sex with Willa.”
“Good for you,” he says lazily into his pillow.
“But it was different,” I continue.
“Bad different?” He shifts in his bed. My light is still on, but it’s easier to talk about this stuff without having to look at him.
“No, good different.” I take a deep breath and crack my knuckles. “It was…incredible, but we’re just friends.”
“Not anymore.” Gentry laughs. “You fucked. If it was as good as you’re saying, that means you probably had some kind of connection.”
That’s what I was afraid of.
“No matter how many women I sleep with, none of them compare to Romy. It’s more than good sex.” He shifts again and scoffs out a laugh. “Never sleep with a friend.”
Too late now. It doesn’t matter what I’m feeling, I can’t be with her. I can’t drag her into my shit, but that doesn’t mean I can’t keep fucking her.
“It doesn’t mean she feels the same,” I mutter to myself, but Gentry answers me.
“Of course it does. That’s why the connection is so good.”
“It doesn’t appear that way for Romy,” I add, feeling the need to be right. Willa made no indication that she had any sort of feelings for me.
“You’re a fucking dick.” Gentry gets up and kicks my bed with his knee on the way to our small shared bathroom.
I am a dick, but a dick that’s right. He can preach about connections and love all he wants, but I have enough willpower to know it’s just good sex.
Practicing with the defensive coach differs from what I’m used to.
I’m used to taking shots on the goal and working on stick handling, but there are a lot more skate drills to it. And I’m the only one messing it up.
“Carter,” Coach Greardon calls out as we begin skating off the ice to get cleaned up. “Stay on and do another lap.”
Fuck me.I’m fucking tired, and all I want is a hot shower and a nap.
I run through more drills and progressions, doing more than the one lap requested. I might as well enjoy the empty rink while I have it.
“Get lower,” a female voice pulls my attention to the bench. “Bend your knees more and focus on keeping your stick on the ice. It helps to focus on that other than your footwork.” Willa leans over the wall and gives me instructions.
“That’s it,” she cheers after I get a good rep in. “That was so much faster. You’re thinking about how you”re staying in the zone too much.”
Having enough with practice, I skate over to her. I’ve done more than they asked for and so far the only thing helping is Willa’s small tip.
“What are you doing here?” I lean against the short wall to catch my breath and wait for her to hobble over.
She still has the boot on, but isn’t walking with the crutches anymore.
“Watching.” She shrugs and hides the sadness in her face with a smile.
She can’t hide anything with those eyes.
“No crutches?” I note, checking out her tight leggings that cling to her hard, athletic legs.
“I was given the ok to walk on the boot.” She grins and puts pressure on and off the boot to show me, stopping to longingly look out at the rink. “I miss being on the ice.”
“Then come on.” I throw my stick over and hold the door open for her to step out in her boot.
“I’ll fall without skates on.” She puts her hands on her hips as if what I’m suggesting is impossible, but she really wants to do it. “If I get hurt again, I’ll get in even more trouble.”
“But it feels so good to be bad.” I lean in and hold out my hand to help her. “I won’t let you fall.”
She takes my hand but hesitates to step out. Biting her lip and looking at the ice with fear in her eyes.
Moving in front of her, I throw my gloves to the side and take her other hand in mine. “Step onto my skates.”
“What?” She laughs nervously. “You’re crazy.”
“Maybe,” I shrug and glide an inch away so that she has to step closer to the threshold, “but I know I won’t let you get hurt, and it might be fun.”
She moves just an inch closer.
“Don’t be a pussy,” I tease her to come out.
If I wasn’t holding her hands, she’d hit me, but I’m keeping those hands firmly in mine to avoid any spontaneous arousals.
“I don’t like that word.” She scowls but moves closer to the ice past the wall. “You got me?”
“I got you.” I assure her, and grip her shaking hands tighter.
She moves closer and steps with her good foot onto the top of my skate. We should’ve thought this through better. There’s no way her clunky boot is going to fit.
I wrap my arm around her waist and hold her against me to keep her steady.
“Hold on to me.” I grab the thigh of her bad leg to hold her boot up while she clutches my arms. “There we go.” I skate backward, with Willa holding onto me for dear life.
Her nails dig in through my practice jersey, clutching on with all the strength she has.
We take it slow, gliding around until I see Willa’s lips turn up into a secret smile. She loves being out here. In the middle of the cold empty rink. It’s a love I never had. I enjoy hockey, but I don’t know if I’d give up everything to play. If something better came along, I’d take it. But hockey is the only thing I’m good at.
“This is so awkward,” she laughs.
“Not romantic?” I joke, making it even more awkward.
She shrieks when I pick up speed and spin us around.
“I wouldn’t call fearing I’m going to break two legs romantic,” she shouts and clutches on even tighter.
“You’re not giving it a chance.” With no warning, I lift her other leg and wrap both around my waist.
“Carter,” she gasps. “What are y—”
I don’t give her a chance to speak before I’m racing around the rink. Going as fast as I can with another human strapped around me. Willa screams and laughs as I spin and glide around like I’m trying out for the doubles figure skating team.
Her smile widens as the cold wind whips through her short, wavy hair.
On the last spin, Willa loses her grip on my pads and slips down my hips, but I’m quick to hold her up so she doesn’t fall.
“Whoa, that was too close.” I slow us down and skate back to the bench.
“You almost dropped me!” She squeezes my waist tighter to free her hand and flicks my ear.
Fuck.
What is she doing to me? How in the world do I get fucking hard from a flick to my ear? There is something seriously wrong with me, but I’m ready to strip her down and fuck her on the cold ice. The image of her coming at center ice manifests in my head, and it’s going to take a lot to get that out.
Unable to make a good stop, I skate her backward until she’s able to sit on the short wall in front of the bench. She jumps from the surprise landing.
“Well, that was fun.” She laughs awkwardly and wants to let go but can’t without losing her balance to fall forward onto the ice or backward into the player’s bench.
“Want to have more fun?” I wiggle my eyebrows suggestively and smooth my hands up her thin leggings and under her small Drexton Hall sweatshirt.
“Carter—”
“Pierce.” Coach Renan’s voice booms out from the opening to the locker room to interrupt us.
Damn.
“Tomlin.” He nods to Willa. “What are you doing on my ice?” He makes his way over and Willa hoists herself over the wall to the bench with my help.
“Drills,” I answer once Willa is safely over. “Willa was giving me some tips.”
“Oh yeah?” He questions us.
“I’m sorry—” Willa begins apologizing, but he cuts her off abruptly.
“Let’s see it then.” He motions for me to line up. “Were you still doing progressions?”
I nod and try not to show my annoyance. I’ve been working through progressions all fucking morning. I’m over this shit and ready to get my dick wet. I’m hoping it’s with Willa, but if not her, I’ll find someone else.
I go through one drill before Willa is yelling from the bench about what I’m doing wrong. Coach whistles for me to keep going through more.
Getting fired up, Willa carefully makes her way onto the ice, holding a stick as a crutch to steady herself and give me instructions.
Coach Renan laughs and comes out with his skates on and a stick in his hand. Dropping a puck between us, he tells me to block him from the net.
Each time, Willa gives me a new tip and tells me when I get it wrong.
God, she’s infuriating.
I hate how fucking right she is. After a few tries, I finally stop him, steal the puck, then make my way across the ice to score my goal.
“Yeah,” Willa shouts and cheers, almost falling before catching herself on the ledge of the wall.
“Alright,” Coach claps, “go take a shower. Tomlin, stay a minute.”
“I’ll be right out,” I assure her before skating off.
Looking back, Coach helps Willa to the players’ bench and sits down next to her. Reluctantly, I leave them, knowing if I stay to listen, he’ll have my head.
Willa will fill me in when I get back, and hopefully she doesn’t get in too much trouble for our little stunt.