Chapter 49 Ivan #2
"Okay," Jay says, wiping his hands on his jeans. "Moment of truth. Want to do the honors?"
He shows Diana how to pull the starter cord. On the third pull, the mower roars to life, sputtering at first then evening out.
"You fixed it!" Caleb shouts, jumping up and down with excitement. "You made it work!"
"It was just a couple small things," Jay says, but he's smiling proudly at the kids. "Sometimes the simple problems look more complicated than they are."
I glance up and see Rosalyn standing in the doorway of the garage, watching quietly. Her expression is thoughtful. When she catches my eye, she nods once slowly and goes back inside without saying anything.
Lunch is chaos in the best possible way. The table is crowded and loud with the kids fighting over who gets to sit next to Jay. They talk over each other constantly, trying to tell Jay stories, tugging on his sleeve, competing for his attention.
The girls talk his ears off, telling him about school and their teachers.
About their friends and their enemies. About the time Caleb accidentally let a frog loose in the house and Rosalyn screamed so loud the neighbors actually called to check if someone was being murdered.
About Destiny's plan to be the first person to live on Mars. About Diana's straight-A report card.
Jay listens to all of it with genuine attention, asking follow-up questions, laughing in the right places.
He's quieter than the rest of us, more reserved and careful.
But he's present. Engaged. Every time Caleb tugs insistently on his sleeve or Destiny interrupts with a correction to whatever story Diana is telling, he gives them his complete attention like they're the most important people in the world.
Under the table, his knee presses against mine. I press back, trying to tell him without words that he's doing great.
After lunch, Rosalyn stands up and starts gathering plates. "Jay, can you help me clear the dishes?"
I start to get up automatically to join them, but she waves me off with a firm hand.
"You stay with the kids, Ivan. Jay and I can handle this. We need to talk anyway."
Jay glances at me with panic in his eyes. I try to give him an encouraging smile that probably looks more like a grimace.
I watch them disappear into the kitchen together. I trust Rosalyn completely, and I trust Jay. But I also know Rosalyn won't hold back if she has something to say.
Soon, I can hear the water running in the kitchen, the clink of plates being stacked in the sink. Their voices are too low to make out individual words, but the conversation seems calm at first. Which I take as a good sign.
The kids scatter—Caleb to his room to get his dinosaur collection to show Jay, the twins to the TV—but I stay at the dining table, straining to hear.
I can barely catch fragments of their conversation.
Rosalyn's voice: "...serious about him..."
Jay's quieter response: "...yes ma'am, completely..."
Rosalyn again: "...understand what you're getting into..."
More murmuring I can't make out.
Then Jay's voice, louder and clearer: "I would never hurt him. I'd rather die than hurt him."
The conversation continues for another ten minutes of back and forth that feel like hours. I'm about to give up and go check on Caleb to calm my nerves when they finally emerge.
Jay looks slightly shell-shocked but not in a bad way. More like he just survived something intense but important. Rosalyn looks satisfied with their talk, almost pleased.
"Jay's going to change the oil in my car," she announces casually, like they just discussed the weather. "Next time he visits." She pats Jay on the shoulder with genuine warmth. "I appreciate his offer."
I stare at her, trying desperately to read what just happened, what was actually said. She gives me a small, enigmatic smile and heads back to the kitchen.
The afternoon passes too quickly, the hours slipping through my fingers like water.
Jay plays dinosaurs with Caleb on the living room floor, building elaborate scenarios with plastic toys.
He lets Diana show him her math homework and helps her figure out a problem she's been stuck on for days.
He listens with genuine interest while Destiny tells him in excessive detail about her plans to be the first person to live on Mars, while asking thoughtful questions about oxygen and gravity.
Jay checks his phone and sighs heavily. "I should head out soon," he says reluctantly. "I want to get back before dark. It's not safe to ride a motorcycle at night on the highway."
"Already?" Caleb's face falls. "But you just got here! You can't leave yet! We're not finished playing!"
"I wish I could stay longer, buddy. But I have a long drive ahead of me, and the bike doesn't have headlights good enough for night riding."
"Will you come back?" Caleb asks. "When are you coming back? Soon, right?"
Jay looks at me, then back at Caleb. "Yeah. I'll come back soon. I promise."
"Can I sit on your motorcycle again?" Caleb asks.
Jay reaches over to ruffle his hair. "Sure, you can."
I walk him out to the motorcycle, the kids trailing behind us like a small parade. When he tells them goodbye, Caleb wraps his whole body around Jay's legs in a big hug. The twins say goodbye with slightly awkward stiffness that's already starting to thaw.
Rosalyn appears on the porch, wiping her hands on her apron. "Drive safe, Jay. We'll see you again soon, I hope."
"Yes ma'am. Thank you for lunch. It was honestly the best meal I've had in a really long time."
"Flattery will get you everywhere," she says, but she's smiling warmly. "Ivan, don't keep him too long out here. He needs daylight for the drive."
She herds the kids back inside, leaving us alone in the driveway.
"What do you think?" I ask, stepping closer to him. "That wasn't so bad, right? You survived."
"They're amazing," he replies. "Your whole family. They're great. I've never met people like them."
"They liked you. I could tell."
"You think so? Really?"
"Caleb wanted to adopt you immediately. And the twins don't warm up to anyone that fast." I step closer, taking his hands in mine. "You did good, Jay. Really good. What did Rosalyn say to you? In the kitchen? What did you two talk about?"
Jay shakes his head slowly, like he's still processing it.
"She asked me if I was serious about you.
I said yes. She asked me if I understood what I was getting into.
That you come with a family, that those kids are part of the package deal, that they need stability. I said I understood it completely."
"Anything else?"
"She said that you've never brought anyone home before.
Never. Not even a casual friend. The fact that you brought me here and introduced me to them means something important.
" He swallows hard. "She said she can see why you love me.
That anyone who gets down on the floor to play dinosaurs without being asked, can't be all bad. "
"I knew she would love you too."
"Well, she also said if I hurt you, she knows people who can make a body disappear and no one would ever find it." He pauses. "I hope she was joking."
"Mostly joking," I tease.
"She also told me a little about her own childhood.
About growing up in poverty. About how she swore she'd break the cycle, give kids a better life.
" His eyes are shining. "She said she sees something in me.
Something worth fighting for. And that if I'm willing to fight for myself, she'll fight for me too. "
I pull him into a hug, holding him as tight as I can, feeling him shake slightly in my arms. "Thank you for coming today. I know it was hard to put yourself out there."
"It was worth it." He pulls back and looks at me, his dark eyes soft and vulnerable. "I want this too. This life you have here and this family. After meeting everyone, I want to be part of it."
"You already are."
He kisses me then, slow and sweet and perfect, right there in the driveway where anyone could see. Where the neighbors could watch. I don't care even a little bit. Let them see.
"I have to go," he murmurs against my lips.
"I know."
"Call you tonight when I get home safe?"
"Always. The second you get home."
He puts on his helmet and swings onto the bike.
The engine roars to life, powerful and familiar.
He gives me one last long look through the visor before backing carefully out of the driveway.
I watch until he disappears completely around the corner, until the sound of the motorcycle fades into nothing.
When I go back inside, Rosalyn is waiting in the kitchen, drying dishes.
"Well?" I ask, unable to wait any longer. "What do you really think? Be honest."
"It's obvious he's been through a lot. More than anyone should have to go through.
I can see it in his eyes. In the way he holds himself.
The kind of pain that doesn't go away easy.
Maybe doesn't go away at all." She stops drying the dishes and turns to look at me.
"But he's trying. I can see that too. He fixed the lawnmower without thinking twice about it.
Without expecting anything in return. He sat on the floor and played dinosaurs with a six-year-old for over an hour.
He helped Diana with her homework even though I could see he was nervous the whole time.
When he was talking to the kids, he gave them his whole attention like they mattered, not like they were obstacles between him and you. "
"I noticed that too," I say. "He's good with them. The same way he always was with me. Patient and kind."
"The kids have already accepted him," she says. "With open arms."
"How about you?" I ask, holding my breath. "Do you approve of him?"
"It's not up to me to approve or not. The fact that he's trying hard and putting in the effort counts for a lot in my book.
Trying is just as important as succeeding.
" She crosses to me and puts her hand on my cheek, the gesture so maternal it makes my throat tight. "It's very obvious you love him."
"I do. More than anything. I always have in one way or another. The love has always been there between us."
She smiles at me. "I could see it the moment he pulled into the driveway.
The way your whole face changed. The way you lit up.
I wish he'd been part of our family when he was younger.
When you both first came into the system.
Maybe things would have been different for him if he'd had a stable home like this one.
If we'd been able to keep you together."
I've thought the same thing a thousand times.
What if the system hadn't separated us? What if Jay had ended up with Rosalyn and Mitchell instead of aging out alone at eighteen?
Would he still be fighting the same demons?
Would the nightmares still haunt him? Would he have needed the alcohol to survive?
"I wish that too, but it wasn't meant to be," I manage to say past the lump in my throat. "Back then, it just wasn't meant to be."
"No, it wasn't," Rosalyn agrees softly. "But maybe he can still be part of our family anyway. It's not too late for that. It's never too late to find your family."
I stare at her, not trusting myself to speak.
"He's good with the kids," she continues.
"Really good. Caleb already adores him. Did you see his face when Jay lifted him onto the motorcycle?
I was watching through the window. And the girls.
They don't warm up to strangers, you know that.
They've been burned too many times. But they were showing him their homework by the end of the day.
Asking him questions. Hanging around watching him fix lawn mowers, for heaven's sake.
As if they care one thing about broken machinery. That means something."
She pauses, choosing her words carefully. "Family isn't just about blood. You know that better than anyone in this house. It's about who shows up when things are hard. Who stays when it would be easier to leave. Who chooses to love you."
"He's choosing us," I say quietly. "He told me as much. He drove for hours on his motorcycle on I-75 just to be here for one afternoon. Just to meet you all."
"Then we'll choose him back. That's how family works." She pats my shoulder and turns back to the dishes. "Now go make sure Caleb isn't trying to dig up the entire backyard looking for dinosaur bones again. He had that look in his eye earlier."
I laugh and head for the back door, my heart lighter than it's been in weeks.
Jay met my family, and he fits.
And maybe, he's finally found the home he never had.
The home we both deserved all along.