Chapter 2.19 #5
She laughed again, laying her head back against his chest. When they stopped, he dismounted and helped her down.
At that moment, Mr Bennet appeared from the back door and stopped in surprise to look at them with curiosity and then reproach, studying their crimson faces, hair in disorder, and embarrassed looks. They glanced at each other and realised they looked far from proper.
“Mr Darcy! I thought you left long ago, sir.”
“I… We…” They both turned red while struggling to speak.
“Well, well… I guess I must congratulate myself on insisting to shorten your engagement.”
“Papa, we—”
“Lizzy dear, go and change for dinner before your mother sees you. I shall see you soon,” Mr Bennet said gently, highly amused.
Darcy stepped further and tried to arrange his coat as he struggled to speak coherently.
“Mr Bennet, it is my fault. I saw Elizabeth going for a walk, and I returned to meet her. I know it was not proper; I am sorry. But please believe me, I shall never do anything to harm Elizabeth nor expose her to a compromising situation. Please be assured that—”
“Do not excuse yourself any more, sir; it is really not necessary. I would warn you to be careful to avoid other awkward moments like this one, but I confess I am pleased to see my daughter so happy. At least I am not concerned she might have married you for your wealth.” Mr Bennet laughed, enjoying the chance to tease his guest.
“Tomorrow I plan to go to London and make all the arrangements for the wedding. In the meantime, I shall not allow any other similar situation to occur; that I promise.”
“Oh, do not promise such a thing; you may not be able to keep it. Do not be embarrassed, sir; I do remember what love and passion mean. I have been passionately in love with my wife since we married. Unfortunately, we had little in common except that. I have great hopes that things will be different with you and my Lizzy.”
“Thank you, sir,” Darcy replied, astonished by such a confession.
“Now go and change, too, before Mrs Bennet spots you. As fond as she is of you, it would be difficult to explain to her why your clothes have grass stains. You must hurry; dinner will be ready in an hour. I am hungry, and Netherfield is not that close. Oh, and I forgot to mention: Mr Bingley might keep you company to London tomorrow. He seemed determined to force me to accept a double wedding. My wife is exceedingly upset with that arrangement, but it is very likely Mr Bingley will eventually win.”
∞∞∞
The next day, Mr Darcy and Mr Bingley left for London after a short visit to Longbourn.
To Elizabeth’s surprise, Mr Darcy handed her a small package a little larger than a book.
He whispered she should open it only after his leaving, which made Mrs Bennet speculate about the possibility of its being a box of jewels.
It was settled that the gentlemen would stay in Town until the licenses and settlements were ready.
Mrs Bennet was still upset with Mr Bingley for stealing the opportunity of arranging a second wedding.
Even more, she was worried that a double wedding would not satisfy Mr Darcy’s notions of grandeur.
She was certain he would not want to share such an important event with anyone else, and nothing Elizabeth said to convince her otherwise had any success in calming her nerves.
As soon as the gentlemen departed, Elizabeth retired to her room and, with eager hands, untied the package; inside, she found four envelopes.
She searched them carefully and found a number on each of them.
Beside the envelopes, there was a note, with no envelope to protect it.
She understood it was the first to be read.
My beloved Elizabeth,
I will be away for four days, and I hope you will miss me as much as I shall miss you.
I cannot believe that less than two weeks have passed since our engagement—two weeks, as long as a lifetime and as short as a heartbeat. I still have so many things I wish to share with you, to tell you, to show you, that I wish to trap the time and chain it to last longer.
I have enclosed four letters, one for each day I will be gone.
Open them one by one and try to understand my chaotic thoughts and my tormented feelings; if anyone can understand, you are surely the one.
In two weeks’ time we will be together forever, and perhaps I should wait until then to tell you everything that remains unsaid. But I am certain, beyond any doubt, that we will not have time to discuss the past nor to trouble ourselves with it.
In two weeks’ time, there will be only the present and the future—our present and our future.
And our love.
Forever yours,
FD
She read the note over again, pressed her lips over it, then read it again. A sharp pain in her chest betrayed her love and the cold sense of loneliness. He would be gone for four days—four days as long as a lifetime.
Slowly, she opened the envelope with number one on it.
Inside, she found four sheets, fully covered with his handwriting. She glanced at the first page, and with surprise and equal pleasure, she saw the letter was a close confession of his thoughts from the first day they met at the Meryton assembly.
Day by day, hour by hour, moment by moment, everything was there. The first letter ended at the moment she left Netherfield after Jane’s illness.
His thoughts, his fears, his hopes, his mind, and his heart—everything was there and there was so much more to come!
She read the letter several times, then rushed to her desk, took a pen and paper and started to write.
My beloved soon-to-be-husband,
I always said I wished to marry only for the deepest love, but I never knew what love meant until you captured my soul, my mind, and my body.
I never imagined what true love might be until you taught me—and I can only count my heartbeats until the moment we shall belong to each other and step together into our future.
But, as you know, my thoughts were not always so—not at all.