Chapter Thirty-Two
Remi
Benji’s was packed, but mellow. It was more of a gathering of people who were just bored of being inside this late in the winter, but they were bored together. Brooks, Hazel, and I sat at a table waiting for Nora and Alicia to join us after euchre club.
Hazel and I had talked about the night of the party where she couldn’t even pretend to be polite to Alicia, and how I did not fucking like that.
I understood Hazel feeling protective, I had felt the same way when her boyfriend had blindsided her with a breakup a couple of months ago.
When Hazel had gotten back together with Elijah, I’d been skeptical, and I wouldn’t have described myself as warm toward him. But I wasn’t an asshole.
Obviously, I wanted my friend, and boss, to be decent to . . . whatever Alicia and I were to each other—we were avoiding conversations about relationship labels and the future. The stress of it was not making me better at being patient with Hazel’s attitude.
The conversation had gone okay.
I kept the details of me and Alicia vague, which was easy to do since they were vague.
“It’s not your job to decide who deserves to be around me and what can or cannot be forgiven,” I pointed out.
“That’s not what I’m doing?” Hazel replied.
“Then what are you doing?”
“I don’t have to like her.”
“Of course not, but that’s not what I’m asking of you.”
She sighed and nodded.
She had apologized, but I was still skeptical of her sincerity.
Which I would tolerate as long as she wasn’t mean.
I was also a bit on edge because it would be the first time Alicia and I were hanging out in public, and I wasn’t sure how we could act. Being alone with her, touching her, it would be really hard to pretend that I hadn’t relearned the paths of her body.
Then she walked through the door, and I knew without a doubt I wouldn’t be able to.
Her clothes were appropriate for a casual hangout with the grandmas of the area—loose sweater that ended just above her hips, and wide legged jeans.
But the hints of her body underneath was enough to drive me crazy.
Her hair was in a high ponytail—all girl next door and sporty.
She scanned the room until her eyes met mine. My heart almost beat out of my chest at the triumphant smile that filled her face. I shifted in my seat, placing my elbows on the table, my own smile absolutely conquering my face.
“Yeah?” I asked as soon as she was in hearing distance.
She nodded. “I got ’em!”
“You did?!” A shiver ran through my entire body, a mixture of joy, and pride, and love for this woman who wanted nothing more than to make the world a better place.
“I did,” she practically squealed.
My chair scraped loudly against the polished cement floor. “You did!”
She fell into my open arms, her face hidden in my neck, and I knew she was fighting back her tears.
“I knew you would,” I whispered, emotion thick in my throat. “I knew you would.”
Pulling back, she dabbed under her eyes with her ring fingers. “I didn’t.”
It was a testament to my restraint that I didn’t kiss her then.
Her eyes shone with unshed tears and her cheeks were pink.
Her eyes darted to her left, which was how I realized we had an audience the size of the bar.
The world around us was like a mosquito buzzing around my ear, irritating and I couldn’t swat it away. This wasn’t my moment, anyway.
“Let’s celebrate.” I pulled the chair next to mine out for her. “What do you want to drink? My treat.”
“I’ll get the next one,” Nora offered.
But Hazel shook her head.
For a moment, anger spooled in my gut. It would be very hard to forgive her if she ruined this night for Alicia.
It washed away when Hazel said, “I’ll get it.”
It was by no means an absolution of Alicia’s and my past, or even an acceptance of what we might be. But it was good as hell of her to extend the gesture.
“Feels like I should offer too,” Brooks added, lifting his beer in a lazy cheers.
“Thank you all, so much.” Alicia beamed.
Shortly after, I returned to the table with the drinks.
Nora and Alicia were recounting the evening.
The card game had been forgotten as soon as Nora made her announcement, and phones were pulled out—instructions on how to use various phone brands hollered across the room as some of the technologically impaired struggled.
“Then cars started showing up,” Alicia said, excited energy coming off her in waves.
Apparently, when the matriarch of these families asked, or told, their children and grandchildren to show up and sign a petition, they did.
“It was the most powerful thing I’ve ever seen,” Alicia added. Under the table, she pressed her knee to my thigh.
The space between our two chairs had grown too far.
I’d probably only be satisfied if she was in my lap.
I could bear it; this couldn’t be worse than the past couple of weeks.
At least I’d had an excuse to hug her. At least I had the press of her knee.
At least I was close enough to smell her clove-scented shampoo.
“Lily even pulled up to sign.” Nora crossed one leg over the other and looked at Alicia. “What did she say to you?”
She pursed her lips and narrowed her eyes at the ceiling in thought. “Something like, the one that got away. It was the weirdest thing. I don’t even know her.”
I rubbed my hand across my jaw. “Remember the appointment I had before Furgie?”
She gasped. “That was her? Remi, that woman is dressed in red flags.”
Holding my hands out, I said, “I never. I didn’t even encourage her.”
“You didn’t even get to play any euchre?” Hazel asked, changing the subject which I appreciated.
“One hand,” Alicia and Nora said, practically in unison.
Alicia must have caught me smirking, because she rolled her eyes.
Hazel tilted her head toward Nora in false sympathy. “That bad, pumpkin?”
Staring down at the tabletop, Nora shook her head. “It’s violating every time.”
“It was as much a slaughter as you said it would be,” Alicia admitted.
I squeezed her knee under the table, letting my hand rest there longer than necessary. “There was nothing you could do.”
“The patronizing is really soothing the sting of it.”
Giving her my most sanctimonious expression, I nodded. “I know.”
“Hey guys.” Lola walked up to our table, her bulky coat wrapped around her shoulders.
We greeted her, and Alicia smiled, but I could feel her tensing. I knew it had more to do with the embarrassment of feeling jealous of someone else, than it had to do with Lola herself.
“Bet was supposed to come, but Melody got sick right as she was walking out the door. Is it cool if I hang out with you?” Lola asked.
“Of course.” Nora looked at the tables around us, then pointed. “There’s a chair over there.”
“Great, be right back.” Lola turned to grab the empty seat.
There was room for her at the end, but I had the excuse I’d been looking for.
I hooked my fingers on the underside of Alicia’s seat and tugged, pulling her as close to me as I could.
Her thigh relaxed against mine, and I had to drape my arm across the back of her chair.
She flicked her eyes up to mine with a flash of desire and promise.
Nora and Hazel were distracted with getting Lola settled.
Not that Alicia and I went completely unnoticed.
Brooks’ eyebrow twitched, but he didn’t say anything.
“Now there’s plenty of room,” I whispered in Alicia’s ear.
“I like it better here, anyway.” Her fingers splayed across my leg, before resting on the inside of my thigh. And I wondered if it was too early to take her home.