16. Chapter 15
Chapter 15
Law
O ak and I needed to talk. I knew it. I was sure he knew it. But I hadn’t found an opportunity to do so yet. Between how busy we both were, and then my little hooligans occupying the rest of my time, it had been difficult. But I had to stop putting it off. I needed to know he was okay about what happened.
That was why, when Mary called and sweetly demanded a sleepover with the kids, I took her up on it. I would have never asked, because I never wanted to shuffle the care of my children onto someone else. But she couched her demand as a question and was so prepared to argue her case that she didn’t hear my agreement at first.
“Because really, Law. You need a break too. The past couple of weeks have been a lot for you as well, and you deserve downtime too.”
I chuckled. “I said it sounds like fun.”
Mary wasn’t listening. “It’s really for me too, you know. Grams deserves time with the grandchildren, especially the ones I’ve chosen, don’t you think.”
It wasn’t a question but I answered anyway. “You bet. You’re right, of course. Take my children for a sleepover. Get them all hopped up on sugar. It’ll be great.”
She made noise that was somewhere between disbelief and amusement. “Excellent. I’m on my way. Get the children packed and sufficiently excited for Grams’ time. Sean’s making pizza dough, and the kids can help put them together, choosing their own toppings.”
“They’ll love that.”
Forty-five minutes later, my squealing excited children were talking Mary’s ear off as we loaded them into her car. I’d been prepared to move the booster seats, but to my surprise, Mary already had appropriate ones installed. I really shouldn’t have been surprised though. Of course she would have them. Because she really had adopted my kids as extra grandchildren.
I watched them drive away and then, when the car turned past the motel and disappeared, my gaze slid toward Oak’s cabin. I couldn’t quite see it from where I was, but I knew he was home. Not only because it was one of his rare weekends off, and I heard his car drive by, but I knew he was watching Salem this weekend for Charlie and Teague’s trip to Lake Placid.
Marlie and Tristan had been all sorts of put out that Salem was staying with Oak instead of us while Uncle Charlie was gone. But that arrangement had been in place before we decided to up and move across the country. Besides, Salem hadn’t quite grown out of his “get into everything” phase yet. And there was far less to get into in the cabin.
I’d seen the inside at Thanksgiving, but not since. I had to wonder how much Oak had changed it to suit himself. I bet it was awash in color and light. I just couldn’t picture him in a dim and monotone home. He was brightness and joy.
Fuck.
I scrubbed my hands over my face, and then before I could talk myself out of it, I trudged toward the cabins. Even though it was barely five, it was already dark, but the path to both the cabins and the motel was well worn. Besides, I’d made sure it was cleared of snow and well salted just that afternoon. A brisk wind kicked up causing me to huddle down into my jacket, but I didn’t have to worry about tripping.
As I made my way around the bend, the softly glowing cabin came into view. The other seven and the fire pit in the middle were dark and a bit spooky looking. But not Oak’s cabin. The windows were lit up and the enticing sight had me picking up my pace. Before I knew it, I was at the door.
I had to steel myself before I knocked. Gave myself a stern talking to. I was just here to check in with him and make sure he was okay with everything. I’d kissed him and ran, which was a shitty thing to do. Although I was sure he understood, I had to make sure he was all right. And once I did, we could put this all behind us and move on with our lives.
I knocked. Waited. Less than a minute later, the door cracked open, just enough for me to see Oak’s face. Which showed the surprise he felt at seeing me here.
“Law. Hi.” His voice was soft, hesitant, and I tried to smile. “What are you—no you can’t go outside, you silly cat.”
Salem was trying to make a break for it, but Oak’s quick footwork pushed him back far enough. Considering how dark it was, plus how cold it was, it made sense for him to keep Salem inside.
“Hi. Do you have a few minutes? I’d like to talk.”
It took Oak several seconds to answer, but then he gave a nod, bent down to swoop the cat into his arms, and stepped back. I stomped my feet to get any extra snow off my boots before entering the cabin and shutting the door behind me. Then I shrugged off my coat and hung it on the peg before toeing off my books. I didn’t want to track snow and mud into his home.
“Can I get you something to drink?” Oak called from the other side of the space, where the kitchenette was. “There’s water and, oh, cherry Pepsi if you’re like your brother.”
I chuckled. “Water’s fine. Thanks.”
While he was taking care of that, I looked around, smiling to myself as I realized I was right. There was color everywhere, from the red retro-looking lamp, to the throw blankets, to the rugs. It was warm and cozy inside, and I felt myself relaxing a touch. My attention caught on a tiny bright blue door near the bathroom, and I crossed the room to study it.
“What’s this?” I asked softly when I heard him approach. I turned to him to take my glass and noticed the blush that stained his cheeks. I’d never considered that was a particular turn on for me, but on him, it was utterly delectable.
Dammit. I had to keep my thoughts in order and my wits about me. None of that tonight.
Oak cleared his throat. “It’s a fairy door.” At my blank look, he shook his head and smiled slightly. “You know. So fairies can move between our world and theirs.”
I grinned. “Is that so?”
Oak averted his gaze and stepped back a few feet. “Usually you see them in gardens, but since I don’t have a garden for my collection…” He sighed and wouldn’t look at me. “I just like them.”
“Nothing wrong with that. They’re pretty.” Oak must have heard the sincerity in my tone, because he jerked his gaze up to mine and after a second or two, smiled. The way it lit up his face was going to by my undoing and I needed to keep us on the right track. “Can we sit?”
Oak’s smile fell, and he nodded instead of answering. I waited for him to get comfortable on the sofa before I sat on the other end. Not that the furniture was that big, because even though I did my best to keep distance between us, there was still only a few inches separating us.
I took a sip of water before I set the glass down on the coffee table. “I thought we should talk about what happened between us the other day.”
He grabbed one of the throw pillows and set it on his lap, wrapping his arms around it as though he was using it as a shield. Even though I wanted to poke, I waited for him to speak. Technically, he could refuse the conversation and kick me out, so I wanted to see where his head was at.
“Communication and all that shit,” he muttered so low I could barely hear him. I was going to respond to that anyway, but he took a breath. “I thought you were straight.”
Okay, so we were getting right into it. That was fine with me. We could start there. “Only mostly.”
Oak squinted at me, cocking his head to the side, trying to puzzle that out. “Explain that, please.”
I shrugged. “If you want a label, then I’m bi. Or pan, maybe. It doesn’t really matter, honestly. Just that I’m mostly, but not exclusively, attracted to women and femme presenting people.”
It took him a minute or two to process that. “Not exclusively. So you’ve been attracted to a man before.”
“A few times, yeah. A while ago. But I’ve had Caitlyn, so…”
He nodded. “So I’m not the first.”
I couldn’t quite decide from his tone if that was a good thing or a bad thing. Either way, I needed to be completely honest. “No, sweetheart. You aren’t the first. You’re just one of the…select few.”
Oak sucked in a breath, but though he was turned toward me, his gaze was fixed somewhere over my shoulder. A beat passed, and then another, before he said, softly, “Let’s leave the endearments out of this for now.”
“Of course. I’m sorry.”
“There’s no need to—” he shook his head. “I just get the feeling you're not here to throw me down on my bed and ravish me, so say what you wanna say.”
I nearly groaned, because the instant he said it, my mind supplied a very vivid image of me doing just that. But he was right. I wasn’t here to do that, and we needed to focus on the important part.
“I’m here to check in with you. To apologize for that kiss if necessary. I don’t regret it, so please don’t think that.” I took a breath. “But you know why it can’t happen again.”
Oak finally met my gaze, and his eyes were blazing. When he spoke his tone was a little…bitter perhaps. A touch of anger for sure. “No, I don’t think I do. You’re going to have to spell it out for me.”
It was moments like this when his age really showed. He was acting like a brat, but I couldn’t exactly fault him. I’d put us in this situation, and even though the last thing I wanted to do was hurt him, I could understand why he was lashing out.
“I’m far too old for you, for one.”
He scoffed. “Fourteen years is nothing. I don’t care about that.”
“I do.”
He glared at me. “That’s dumb. Fourteen years means nothing in the grand scheme of things. Pick something else, if you’re so determined.”
I loved his fire. I really did. He was such a happy guy and full of heart. But seeing the anger lit me up as well. It showed me he knew his own wants and desires, and if the circumstances were different, it would be another tick in the attraction column. I wanted to grab the throw from the back of the couch and toss it over my lap to hide just how much I liked it, but that would just draw more attention to it, so I forced myself to remain still.
Lucky for me, and unlucky for him, I had a whole list. “More importantly than the age thing, which is a factor,” I paused for his scoff before I continued, “is the fact that you’re my brother’s boyfriend’s nephew. Grandkid to my kids’ adopted grandparents. And we work together. All of those should put you firmly in the ‘no’ box.”
To his credit, he didn’t immediately refute what I said. He chewed his lip as he thought about it, and I watched the emotions play over his expressive features. He was trying to find an argument, and I could practically see him coming up with rebuttals and dismissing them. As the minutes stretched on, I expected to feel triumphant. But instead, I just felt a growing sadness. It was only then that I realized there was a small part of me hoping that he’d have a sufficient argument that would change my mind.
I reached out and pulled his lip from between his teeth as I whispered, “You’re going to make yourself bleed.”
He whimpered. Just the tiniest sound, but it damn near broke me. I grabbed the pillow and tossed it aside, scaring Salem from his hiding spot. The cat took off, streaking under the bed, but I barely noticed, as I pulled Oak into my arms. I’d meant just to hug him, to let him down easy, but then he straddled my lap and wound his arms around my neck.
This close, I could see the faintest smattering of freckles across his nose, and for just a second, I got lost in the ocean of his eyes. Before I could pull myself out of the trance, Oak spoke.
“That’s all bullshit. I mean, it’s not.” He made a frustrated sound, and then a sigh as he settled over my lap. I was half-hard and getting harder, and there was no mistaking he was in the same state. “Those reasons do matter. But that doesn’t mean we can’t be something . I don’t want forever. I don’t even want strings. Just a little bit of you.”
Without input from my brain, my hands had drifted to his ass and I pulled him in closer, squeezing my fingers. He let out a low moan that fired my blood. I tilted my chin to bring our lips together, but before they touched, I whispered, “That could get really messy.”
“I think I like messy,” he murmured back.
I kissed him. Hard and full of want, devouring with lips and tongue. Oak didn’t hesitate to give back as good as he got, sliding his fingers into my hair so I couldn’t pull away. Not that I wanted to. I’d come here to make sure he was good, to make sure he knew why this was a bad idea all around. But all that resolve disappeared now. Because he was here, and squirming on my lap, and all the want bubbled up and spilled over. Oak rocked his hips, our erections pressed together, and that was it, I was done. It was still a bad idea, but in that moment, I couldn’t see a reason why two adults couldn’t get off together when we both wanted it so badly.
I flipped him under me, pressing him down into the couch, and tore my lips from his so I could breathe. Oak’s whine was music to my ears and I grinned as I kissed along his jaw to his neck. The possessive part of me wanted to leave a mark so the whole world would know he was mine, that I’d done that, but I was smarter than that. I nosed the neckline of his shirt out of the way and sucked on his collar bone instead.
He threw his head back, arching into me, and then wrapped his legs around my hips. I pressed him down so he couldn’t move, then reluctantly lifted my head to look him in the eye. His pupils were blown, the black all but swallowing up the blue, and with the flush to his face and the swollen lips, I’d never seen anything more beautiful.
“You wanna get off?” I murmured, moving one hand up to tip his chin back, the other down to his waistband.
“Yessss,” he whined.
I made quick work of lowering his sweatpants, but when I reached down to open my jeans, he batted my hands away to take care of it himself. I couldn’t help but watch his slim fingers working the button and zipper, then fishing my dick out of the opening in my boxers. I didn’t waste time lining us up and gripping us both together. His cock was slender but long, as pale as the rest of him though the head was looking decidedly purple. I wanted my mouth on it, which wasn’t a surprise since I loved giving oral to my partners. But that would have to wait. We were both too on edge.
It took a minute for me to find the right grip and rhythm that worked for us both. The slide would have been better with some lube, but it didn’t take long for the pre cum we were leaking to ease the way. Then Oak’s hand joined mine, and I stared into his eyes as we climbed higher, chasing that orgasm.
Oak went tense, his breaths turning to harsh pants, and I doubled down on the effort. With a loud moan, he came, and I kept stroking, using his cum as lube to bring myself off as well. It took me another minute, maybe two, before I held my breath and added to the mess between us. I couldn’t quite catch my breath when I was done, and my arm was shaking from holding me up.
“Fuck,” Oak swore, but then laughed, the good kind of sound that meant he was giddy. I chuckled too, and tried to collapse sideways, even though there wasn’t much room. Oak wasn’t having it, guiding me to rest on him. Our cum squished between us, the clothes doing a decent job of keeping it off our skin.
Oak scratched my scalp. “Yeah. I like messy.”
I kissed his sternum, a little bit mad at the shirt in the way. We hadn’t even gotten naked, and skin on skin was one of my favorite things. Oh well. Next time.
No, wait. There couldn’t be a next time. Aw, goddammit. This just complicated things further. As soon as my breathing slowed to normal, I said, “Oak, look—”
“Shhhh.”
I lifted my head, peering at him to find him goofily grinning back. “Did you just shush me?”
“I did.” He nodded rapidly, the grin growing. “You were going to say something stupid. You liked it, right?”
“Of course I did. You’re fucking delectable. But—”
“Shhhhh. No buts.” He slid his hands into my hair again and when he tugged, I went more than willingly. The chaste kisses turned into a little more, something with a bit more heat, but not enough to get either one of us worked up again. “It doesn’t have to be a whole thing, Law. Just enjoy it.”
Part of my brain wanted to argue. To put firm boundaries in place that neither of us could cross again. But the rest of my brain was cum dumb, and I just gave in. For tonight, for the moment , we could just be two men who had a very mutually satisfying orgasm. The rest would sort itself out.