10. Nevaeh
Thursday night is bowling night whenever Papa is home for the holidays. Mama and I are on one team while Papa and Nova are on the other. Since my injury, I’ve been too scared to do any heavy lifting or extreme exercise with my right arm, which is why Mama and I are at a great disadvantage. I’m too scared to throw properly.
Lucky for us, however, Nova is extremely uncoordinated. Years of bowling have not improved her skill, and I chuckle every single time her bowling ball lands in the gutter. It happens more often than it should, but it doesn’t stop her from having the best time.
We’re head-to-head in our first game. Papa picks up his sparkling-purple bowling ball and squats low with it to analyze which angle is best. Mama and Nova burst into laughter while I grin and look around the bowling alley.
My eyes drift to the entrance just in time to notice Adrian, Gabriel, and Valentina walk in. My heart stutters at the sight of him, not entirely sure if I”m imagining it or if he’s really here. It can’t be that he and I somehow keep meeting unless…
Well, I don’t really believe in fate, so what the hell is it?
The couple is holding hands and smiling at each other as Adrian arranges for shoes and a lane. If he didn’t look so damn attractive in that long black coat and matching beanie, I’d manage to look away before he catches me staring. But he does, so I ogle him until his gaze meets mine, and I awkwardly turn my head as heat rushes into my face.
“Why are you so red?” Nova asks, and I lift my hands to my cheeks. My skin is on fire, which means she’s right. I am red in the face.
“It’s hot in here,” I lie and remove my sweater to sell it.
My sister’s eye twitches as she half closes it, a sign that she doesn’t believe a single word falling from my lips. Her inquiring gaze would usually make me confess, but, conveniently enough, it’s my turn to bowl.
I jump out of my seat and move toward the bowling balls return machine to grab the blue one I’m using.
Knowing Adrian Romana is here, potentially watching my every move, causes my heart rate to pick up speed. He has a strange sort of effect on me. He makes me a different kind of nervous, not the nervous feeling that comes with my anxiety. He makes me nervous in the butterfly sort of way. The one where those little creatures bat their wings rapidly to create a storm inside of my stomach and chest.
I’m about to throw the ball when his smooth voice fills my ears.
“Mr. Fuchs, it’s very nice to see you.” Polite, hot, sweet, and capable of pronouncing my last name properly.
It’s a combination I’ve never encountered in a man before.
I mess up my throw and stop a second before facepalming myself. Not the best impression to make, but I pretend it doesn’t bother me as I take a couple deep breaths to prepare for what’s to come.
“How many times do I have to tell you to call me Robert?” my father replies, and I turn around to see them shaking hands.
Valentina does so next and Gabriel follows afterward.
Papa is highly respected in Formula One. He’s seen as one of the best team principals the sport has ever had. He got the team to the top with his planning, commitment, and drive. Almost all the drivers want one of the two seats available because Grenzenlos has one of the best cars and a phenomenal team. Gabriel may have won the championship last season, and Velocità Rossa won the Constructors’ Championship, but Papa has been working non-stop to prevent that from happening again.
“This is my wife, Emma, and my daughters Nova and Nevaeh,” Papa says to the three drivers as I come closer, catching Adrian’s and Valentina’s eyes.
“I have already met your lovely daughter,” Adrian states as he looks at me, causing my body to react in a hundred different ways, all telling me to take a step closer to him. I manage to keep from doing so, but Adrian moves toward me instead. “How are you, Nevaeh?” he asks softly, and I melt from the way he says my name.
“Oh, um, good,” I reply, too perplexed to form a proper sentence. Sensing my confusion, he turns to his sister and waves her over to where we’re standing.
“Nevaeh, this is Valentina. Val, this is Nevaeh. You’re her favorite driver in Formula One,” he says, and I have trouble speaking for another moment.
The first female Formula One driver smiles warmly at me, making my heart drop into my pants.
“Valentina, you’re an inspiration. I can’t believe I’m meeting you,” I admit, my hands starting to sweat. The only time I will get this nervous is in the presence of a powerful, influential woman like Valentina.
Adrian came close, but I got nervous for a different reason with him.
“Thank you, you’re too sweet. Adrian has told me a lot about you,” she says with a smile before he nudges her, and I grin. “I heard you will be traveling with Griffin Sports to all of the races. Are you excited?” My eyes drift to Adrian, who is rubbing the back of his neck and smiling at the floor.
He told Valentina more than I thought he would.
“Yes, I am, and you must be too. This is your first season in Formula One as a driver! That’s incredible,” I point out, and she gives me an enchanting smile that I can’t help but return. I see Adrian in all of her features, except Valentina’s are softer and Adrian’s are more chiseled.
Both of them are gorgeous though.
“Only took over a decade to fight their misogynistic mindsets to get my seat,” she replies. Adrian looks at his sister with a proud smile, warming my insides.
“No one deserves it more than you,” Adrian adds, and I think I swoon internally, something I have never, ever done before.
Gabriel wraps his arms around Valentina’s waist and presses a kiss to her cheek. She gasps in surprise but then giggles happily. My eyes shift to the floor because, whether I’d like to admit it or not, I want what they have. I pretend I don’t most of the time because the thought of wanting this impossible thing is cruel to do to myself. But I do. I want to fall hopelessly in love with someone who I can love in every way. Not just as a partner, but also as a friend, an inspiration, and a favorite person.
I want the kind of love where you fall and fall and fall, never hitting the ground.
I want the kind of love where your partner is right there beside you, holding your hands as you drift among the clouds.
I want the kind of love that isn’t easy but oh so worth it.
Gabriel and Valentina have something most people don’t see, but that I can always identify. They have an unbreakable bond. It often gets chaotic, messy, and painful, but they love each other so much, they will find a way back to one another. Even though I don’t know if any of this applies to them, I sense that it does. Just like I know it applies to Mama and Papa. Just like I know it applies to Aileen and Nova. They’ve had messy times in the past too, but they always came back to each other, every single time.
Adrian’s fingers slide onto my arm, dragging me out of my thoughts and back to reality with a wonderful spark of electricity. It settles inside of me until a dozen explosions go off, warming me until my cheeks heat with a blush. I look up at him and he stares down at me, a single look enough to draw me to him.
“How are you feeling? You seemed very upset after your conversation with Lincoln yesterday,” he says. I can’t pinpoint what makes my heart race anymore. It could be his words, but his skin on mine is also a possibility. Maybe it’s the way he’s looking at me. Or the fact that he’s even looking at me at all.
“Oh, don’t worry. Lincoln and I have known each other for years. He did something stupid a while back, so now I despise him. We fight all the time, it’s normal,” I explain without realizing how much I am sharing with this new acquaintance.
Adrian’s handsome face turns serious and part of me is tempted to place a comforting hand on his cheek, wanting to ease what troubles him.
I barely stop my eyes from revealing how surprised I am at that desire.
“You despise him while he has feelings for you. That sounds like a very complicated situation,” Adrian responds, dropping his hand from my arm and breaking the source of electricity that was rushing through my body.
“I don’t think he has feelings for me.” Even though I suspect Adrian is right, I can’t go around and confirm things like that when Lincoln hasn’t admitted to any of this.
The tall driver cocks an eyebrow at me.
“Okay, if you say so. From what I saw yesterday, I think he does, but you know him better than I do.” I cross my arms in front of my chest and study his face.
“Why do you care anyway?” One corner of my mouth lifts, but he soon makes it drop again as he steps toward me until his breath is on my skin. Adrian leans down until I’m the only one who will hear his next words.
“I could lie and say it’s mere curiosity that has me wondering about you and Lincoln, but I don’t want you to think that’s the only reason I’m interested in you.”
My breath hitches at his admission, unable to stay steady when his words are so heady and wonderful, they twist my stomach in the best way.
No part of me wants him to back away, so when he does, disappointment consumes every inch of me.
He clears his throat and straightens out his shirt.
“I should let you go back to your family. Have a wonderful evening, Nevaeh.” Adrian attempts to walk away, but I hold onto his trained arm.
“You can’t say something like that and then walk away,” I say, and he steps back in front of me with an intrigued sparkle in his eyes. I’ve surprised him and he seems to enjoy that a lot.
“Then come with me. Let’s go for a walk,” he suggests and holds out his hand to gesture for me to go first
I don’t hesitate before grabbing my jacket to lead him out of the bowling alley.
Mama and Papa are completely wrapped up in their conversation with Gabriel and Valentina so I only tell Nova where I’m going. She gives me a not-so-subtle thumbs up, and I wink at her.
Adrian waits until I’m finished putting on my jacket, and we go outside into the freezing night air.
Snow falls on us, and Adrian turns to me to adjust my scarf and hat.
“Thank you,” I mumble, and he grins at me.
“I know you have a fire inside of you that could probably melt all the snow around us, but just to be safe,” he says with a smirk. I bite my bottom lip and shake my head, trying my best not to look at his panty-dropping smile. “I really mean it, Nevaeh. You’re full of fire and confidence, and, at the same time, shy and sweet. It messes with my head a little. I don’t know what to expect from you,” he admits, but I walk past him without responding.
I’ve never received a compliment from someone that gets my heart racing in the way he does. It makes me feel all tingly inside, and I have no idea what I’m supposed to do with this feeling.
“You must know how good you are with your words,” I point out, and Adrian runs his tongue over his bottom lip to hide the amusement I can see creeping onto his face.
“You’re a beautiful woman with a name that means ‘heaven.’ It’s your influence on me that makes me good with words,” he replies before looking me up and down with desire and fascination.
I stop walking to lean my head backward and let out a laugh.
He must do that on purpose.
“What are you trying to do with me?” I eventually ask. Adrian takes a step toward me and fixes his hair, which is now covered in snow.
“The same thing you’re doing to me,” he admits, but it doesn’t clear things up for me.
“And what might that be?” He takes another step closer, but so do I. The fogs of our breaths intertwine and dance in front of us in perfect harmony.
I have no idea what the hell we’re doing. This man is a stranger. And a player. Everyone knows Adrian Romana isn’t the relationship type of person—I did my research over the past three months.
They call him the heartbreaker of F1.
He likes to sleep with lots of women but never dates any of them. I know he’s directed his charm my way because he might be interested in hooking up. It’s why I should step away from him, ignore the way he keeps affecting my body when I don’t even know him, but I don’t.
“Take over your mind with thoughts of me. You’ve been in my head for the past three months now, Nevaeh, and I don’t know how to get you out,” he admits, causing shivers to run down my spine. He smells so good, his cologne filling the space between us until he’s all I smell. Until he’s all I see.
“I’m sorry?” I say with a laugh, but he shakes his head, smiling as he tugs a strand of my hair behind my ear. Another shiver of pleasure travels down my spine.
He’s a player.
I try to keep reminding myself of that, try to rationalize why he’s gotten so close, but it’s difficult to remember when he looks at me like I’m the only woman in the world that he wants to touch.
“I’m not. I quite enjoy looking at your face, which is probably why my brain keeps replaying the image of you.” Fuck, he knows exactly what he’s doing, but my cheeks flush red anyway.
His gaze trails over my face, studying me, memorizing me.
“Did you really not know who I was when we met?” he asks, taking a step back to give us both space to breathe.
“Not at first, but by the end, I recognized you.” He gives me a thoughtful nod, then smiles even brighter.
“But you were unimpressed?” I almost snort at that.
“Highly,” I lie, and he steps closer again, lifting his fingers to my face but stopping before he touches me.
“May I?” I nod before he even voices the entire question.
A chuckle escapes him as he places his thumb on my cheek, rubbing the skin there once before moving on to my lips and tracing them.
“How about now?” There is a lightness to his voice, a flirtiness I welcome.
“Hmmm, still not impressed,” I lie with a smile, and he chuckles again, leaning down to bring his mouth toward where his thumb is still tracing my lips.
My father’s voice breaks the moment before I have a chance to get lost in a kiss with the hottest man in the world.
“Nevaeh, come back inside, please,” he says, and I almost jump away from Adrian.
This is for the best. I don’t even know this guy, I shouldn’t be kissing him.
Adrian steps back, bringing the thumb that was previously on my lips to his where he runs the pad of it along his mouth. My heart stutters at the intimacy of such a small action, but I do my best not to overthink it.
“I’ve got to go,” I say, but my eyes stay focused on his lips.
“Okay. Next time then,” he replies while slowly backing away, shoving his hands into his pockets and giving me another one of those panty-dropping smiles.
“Good night, Adrian,” I mutter before walking toward my impatient father. He looks unhappy as I move past him and back inside the bowling alley.
“Vaeh, I think we should talk about what just happened,” he says, sounding more demanding than anything else.
“Not today, Papa,” I say because before we can talk, I need to make sense of the situation myself.
“Tomorrow.” He’s not asking in the slightest, which bothers the hell out of me.
“You know, you’re barely home, Papa. I know you haven’t really seen me grow up, but I am. I’m twenty-one years old and what happens between a guy and me is my problem unless I come to you for help. You’re a great father when you’re here, but I need you to stay behind the line you’ve drawn, not cross it,” I reply firmly, standing my ground in front of him for the first time in my life.
“He’s three years older than you, which means he’s a lot more mature,” is the first thing that comes out of his mouth after a few moments of silence. Hurt laces my expression so he quickly adds, “Look at your behavior toward Lincoln. The fighting between the two of you, it’s childish. A grown man like Adrian would never want something serious with someone who can’t even be polite to a close family friend.”
It’s my fault that he doesn’t know why Lincoln and I aren’t on good terms, but he has no right to say this to me. The wound Lincoln opened in my chest has not closed enough for my father to poke it.
“I will show you real maturity now. Instead of pointing out that you have no idea what you’re talking about because you weren’t there when I needed you most, I’m going to walk away. Nothing I’d say to you right now would be polite,so I’ll stay at Aileen’s flat for the night. At least she knows who I am. Maybe you should get to know me better before throwing something so hurtful at my head.” I walk over to Nova to grab my purse and let her know where I plan to be.
“Aileen’s spending a few days at her parents’ house. You can’t go to her,” she informs me.
A groan of frustration almost slips past my lips, but I manage to press them shut to keep the sound inside.
There is only one place I can think of going to escape my father, but it comes at a high price. If I wasn’t so mad at him, I wouldn’t even consider it, but I’m furious.
I have no other option.
Well, here goes nothing…