Chapter Twenty-Eight
Declan
He has no idea what he’s doing to me.
Spreading just enough, he bends one leg, planting his foot near my shoulder. Staring at him from between his thighs, I reach up to run a hand over the flat of his stomach, deliberately taking my time, relishing the way it flexes under my touch.
“Declan…” My name’s barely a whisper, but it’s loud enough that’ll haunt me forever.
“Relax, baby,” I murmur into the crease of his hip, the term of endearment slipping out for a second time without permission. Except this time, I don’t have the haze of alcohol to blame.
He whimpers, cock twitching against his lower stomach. I pull back enough to look at him, really look at his wide eyes, pink cheeks, and chest rising too fast.
He’s beautiful. Crazily, painfully beautiful.
And he’s not mine.
Get out of your fucking head. This isn’t about you.
“Hold your knees and pull back your legs,” I say, shoving my thoughts aside. Because it’s true. Tonight is about him and making him feel good.
Immediately, he cups the backs of his knees and lifts, exposing his pretty pink hole to me. Kissing the inside of his thighs, I continue to the place he wants me the most, my breath ghosting the tight ring of muscle. Blowing gently, he tenses, hips jerking.
“Fuck, Dec…”
He’s so responsive; every small touch lights him up. Dipping my head, I flatten my tongue against him, circling and probing, every sound he makes curling around my ribs and squeezing.
When I glance up at him from between his thighs, the sight sends shock waves of lust to my aching cock straining against the bed. His pupils are blown wider, fingers digging into his legs, already panting, and I’ve barely started.
“More,” he groans, rolling against me. “Please.”
My last shred of sanity gives way.
One hand on his cock, the other holding him open, I spear my tongue inside him. Cooper’s whole body arches off the mattress, a strangled moan torn from his throat. His hand flies to my hair, tugging at the strands, his sexy noises worth every pulled root.
“Yes, fuuuck, yes.”
“Lube,” I demand, lifting my head a fraction. “Under the pillow.”
“Resourceful,” he teases breathlessly, reaching under and tossing me the bottle.
The cap clicks open with a resounding echo, and I quickly coat two fingers, my tongue teasing him some more.
His body lets me in, one finger, then two, his moans better than any of his songs, a rumbling resonance ringing out around my room.
His shudders become more violent the more I open him up, pushing back greedily.
“Want you,” he whimpers, desperate for me, unfiltered bliss in his tone.
It destroys and strengthens me at the same time. His glow, his wildness beneath me, trusting me with every inch of himself… And he doesn’t even know he’s holding my heart in his hands.
“Dec,” he pants as he pulls my hair. “I want you inside me. Now.”
The breath leaves me in a rush, my world tilting, every moment leading up to this.
“Okay,” I say, getting to my knees. “Okay, baby…turn over for me.”
His cheeks flush, and he rolls onto his stomach, shifting his knees under him, clumsy and eager, presenting himself to me. My cock is in agony, and I fist the base, knowing as soon as I’m in his tight heat, I won’t last long.
He glances back at me over his shoulder, curls messy on my pillow, lips swollen from where he’s bitten them, eyes darker with arousal.
“Condoms are in the top drawer,” I say, but he shakes his head.
“Just you.”
He’s trying to kill me. I know he is.
Nodding, I reach for the lube, my hands shaking more than I would like as I coat my cock.
“You’re trembling,” Cooper says, voice catching as I press some inside his hole.
“So are you,” I whisper back, noting the way his thighs twitch under my stare.
“Only because I want this so bad.”
“Me too,” I admit, bending down to kiss the dents at the bottom of his back, slowly and reverently as my hand caresses his hip.
“Tell me if it hurts,” I murmur against his skin.
“It won’t,” he breathes with such confidence. My eyes close, needing a second. “Not with you.”
Swallowing hard, I line up at his entrance, my vision blurring as I start to push past the ring of muscle. I can’t look away, watching his body take me inch by slow inch while he sucks in deep breaths.
“Coop—” I start to say, pausing when I notice the creases lining his forehead.
“Keep going. Please,” he pants, turning his head to look at me.
He’s tight, too tight, the hot grip strangling me so that I can feel my balls pulse with the urge to come with every gentle thrust forward.
I close my eyes, and it takes all my energy to get myself under control as my hips finally rest against him.
When I open them again, I stare down at Cooper, at his flushed skin, his bottom lip clamped between his teeth, and the magnitude of what we’re doing hits me all over again.
“Are you okay?” he asks, cracking open one eye.
I huff a laugh and nod. “Isn’t that meant to be my line?”
“I dunno. But if you’re good, please move. I really need you to move.”
I draw back to the tip and thrust back in this time. Cooper’s body bows, his knees almost giving out as I find a rhythm.
“Oh god, don’t stop, please don’t stop,” he cries, each pistoning of my hips making him rut against the bed.
His voice sounds wrecked, needy, so fucking perfect as he moans, taking me like he was made just for my cock.
He feels incredible. Hot, tight, absolutely perfect.
But underneath his cries, the pants and groans, is an unbearable truth.
He’s falling apart with pleasure; I’m falling apart from loving him.
Every gasp, another cut in my heart. And every time he says my name, it guts me a little more.
He pushes back harder, matching me thrust for thrust, snaking a hand under his legs and starting to stroke.
“I’m close, oh fuck, I’m close.”
His hair sticks to his temples, eyes blown with desire, whimpers escaping when I slam into him over and over.
“Dec…fuck…fuuuck.”
He breaks with a cry, body tightening around me, pleasure ripping through him so fiercely, I feel it everywhere, taking me with him.
It’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever heard.
My fingers dig into his hips, and I know I’ll be leaving bruises as I spill inside him, a sated groan slipping from his lips as he shudders through the last tremors of our orgasms. I hold myself still inside him for a moment, forehead pressed somewhere on his back, throat tight.
I don’t want to move, don’t want this to end, but I don’t have a choice as Cooper sags forward, dropping onto the bed, and I slip out of him. He lets out a contented sigh before rolling onto his back, arm flopped over his forehead, chest rising in short, happy bursts.
Happy. Of course he’s happy.
My legs shake as I get off the bed, ducking into the bathroom to grab a cloth. Bracing my hands on the sink, my head bows, my heart lodging itself into my throat, beating way too hard and fast, trying to warn me of the damage I’ve done.
“Dec?”
The sound of my name has me moving, soaking the cloth in warm water before heading back into my room. He hasn’t moved, still sprawled out, grinning. Kneeling beside him, I gently wipe his stomach, careful around his softening cock, careful with all of him.
“What are you doing?” he asks, giving me a lazy, tired smile.
“Cleaning you up.”
“I can do it,” he murmurs, but doesn’t move an inch, letting me continue.
When I’m done, I toss it aside and pull down the blankets.
“C’mere,” I say, watching as he crawls under without hesitation, scooting close to my side, head on my chest, arm draped across my stomach.
“Was that…” I clear my throat. “Was that okay?”
He releases a breathless, disbelieving laugh. “Are you kidding? Why haven’t we been doing that the whole time?”
My heart twists so hard I almost wince.
“I mean, that was amazing.” He laughs again, fingers idly tracing my stomach. “Wait, what about you? Is your knee okay?”
“Yeah,” I whisper hoarsely. “It’s fine.”
“Good.” He sighs, voice thick with sleep, almost drifting. “Best first time ever.”
I swallow, sliding my hand through his hair. He has no idea how much this hurts, how much it means.
How it isn’t enough.