Chapter 10 #3
Bodhi squeezed my hand but didn’t answer right away. He opened his mouth, then closed it. Opened it again. Closed it. Watching him struggle made my stomach twist.
I shook my head and dropped my gaze to my shoes. “Sorry,” I mumbled, heat creeping up my neck. “I shouldn’t have said that.”
“Iggy,” he whispered.
He dragged a hand over his face with a groan, like he was physically restraining himself. “It’s not that I don’t want to,” he said. “I really fucking do.”
I lifted my free hand, already retreating. “It’s okay. You don’t have to—”
“No,” he cut in quickly. “I really want to, Iggy Pop. It’s just .
. .” He trailed off, licking his lips like he was buying himself time.
“We’re friends. And that means a lot to me.
Plus, we’re fresh out of rehab. Barely sober.
Is this really the best idea? Getting involved with another addict?
Shouldn’t we be putting our sobriety first? ”
“I understand,” I said, but he was already spiralling past me.
“But at the same time,” he went on, taking a step closer. “All I want to do is kiss you. Ever since last night, every time I look at you, all I can think about is the feel of your lips on mine.”
Another step.
“The feel of your tongue,” he murmured. “Of your hard cock.”
Said cock chose that exact moment to betray me, stirring in my skintight leggings as blood rushed south so fast it made me dizzy.
Bodhi reached out and tipped my chin up with two fingers, his thumb brushing the edge of my lower lip. The touch was barely there, but it sent a shiver straight through me. I wanted to take that thumb into my mouth. To suck it. Tease it. Show him exactly what I wanted to do with other parts of him.
“If we hadn’t been in the club last night, I wouldn’t have been able to stop.” He leaned in closer, his breath warm against my skin. “If it weren’t for our stupid leather pants, I’d have fucked you until my name was the only word you remembered.”
I gasped. Bodhi brushed his lips against mine. Not quite a kiss. Just a promise. The tease alone made my knees weak.
“You’re my friend, Iggy,” he went on quietly.
“You’re an addict. I’m an addict. We’re both recovering.
” His voice roughened. “But all I want to do is forget. Forget the edge we’re always standing on.
Forget how easy it would be to fall back into the gutter.
I just want to pretend we’re normal. For five fucking minutes. ”
My chest rose and fell in shallow, desperate breaths. My hands shook so badly I thought the slightest breeze might knock me over. Every instinct screamed at me to grab him, to shove him back against the wall of this very public corridor and kiss him.
And the hunger in Bodhi’s eyes told me he wanted the same. Stormy blue, pupils blown wide. Barely holding on.
I reached out and wrapped my fingers around his wrist. His pulse slammed against my thumb, wild and unsteady, just like my own.
“So,” I whispered. “Let’s pretend.”
“Iggy . . .”
“While we’re on tour, let’s pretend,” I said, tightening my grip. “We’re not addicts. We’re not fuckups barely trusted to function. You’re not a rock star, and I’m not an ex-ballet dancer or a makeup artist. We’re just two normal people.”
I closed the last inch between us. His hand slid from my chin to the back of my neck, firm and possessive, and I held his gaze.
“Pretend with me, Bodhi.”
His lips crashed into mine, and I moaned into the kiss, relief flooding my body so hard it almost hurt.
In the light of day, I’d forgotten how intoxicating this felt.
How euphoric. His tongue brushed my lips, and I opened for him without hesitation, letting him taste me fully.
My toes curled inside my trainers as if my body didn’t quite know where to put all the sensation.
His grip tightened at my neck. I fisted the front of his T-shirt, pulling him closer. We were lost in it until a loud bang echoed somewhere in the building.
Reality snapped back.
We broke apart, breathing hard. His lips were swollen. His eyes wild. Hands clenched at his sides like he didn’t trust them not to touch me again.
I fucking loved this new, unseen version of him.
Another bang rang through the corridor. Without a word, Bodhi grabbed my wrist and hauled me along, bypassing the lift and yanking open the stairwell door. He took the steps two at a time, dragging me after him until my lungs burned.
We spiralled down floor after floor until he stopped in front of a maintenance cupboard on the second level. He looked back at me, question clear in his eyes.
I nodded once.
The door shut behind us and the lock clicked. Then his mouth was on mine again, urgent and hungry, pushing me back until I collided with what felt like a metal filing cabinet. The clang echoed loud enough that we froze, listening.
Nothing.
We didn’t hesitate again.
Bodhi’s hands slid under my hoodie, roaming upward until his fingers brushed over my pebbled nipples. I shuddered.
“You’re sensitive,” he murmured, voice low and wrecked.
I knew he was smirking even though I couldn’t see it.
So I reached down and cupped the front of his joggers, squeezing his hard length through the fabric. The heat of him filled my palm. He groaned and buried his face against my neck.
“You’re sensitive,” I shot back, squeezing in a slow, teasing rhythm.
His teeth bit into my shoulder, sharp and deliberate.
“We don’t have long,” he panted, hands sliding into the back of my leggings, gripping my ass. “And I’m not fucking you for the first time in a cupboard.”
I pressed my hips into his, letting him feel just how far gone I was.
“Then we better do something,” I groaned. “We didn’t come yesterday, and I didn’t jack off this morning.”
“Don’t worry, baby,” he whispered into my ear, sending a shiver through me. “I’ve got you.”
Then Bodhi dropped to his knees.
My protest died before it could form. My leggings and underwear were shoved down my thighs, my cock springing free right in front of his face. His tongue swiped the tip, slow and deliberate, and when he took me into his mouth, I had to clamp a hand over my lips to keep from crying out.
He swallowed me in one smooth motion, and I hit the back of his throat. I nearly lost it right there. My fingers tangled in his hair as he gagged softly, throat tightening around me.
“Fuck,” I whimpered as he pulled back, tongue dragging along my length.
He repeated the motion, setting a steady pace. I felt the saliva slipping from the corner of his mouth. When I tugged his hair, he moaned, the vibration shooting straight through me.
I was already close. Too close.
I slapped his shoulder. “Stop. Stop, stop.”
Bodhi pulled off instantly. “What’s wrong?” Genuine concern threaded through his breathless voice.
“I’m fine,” I gasped. “I just didn’t want to come yet.”
He chuckled, fingers brushing my balls, making me jump.
“Feeling a little on edge?”
“Absofuckinglutely,” I squeaked. “But I really want to blow you.”
“What do you suggest?”
I chewed my lip until an idea sparked.
“Lie down.”
Bodhi blinked. “What?”
“On your back. Trousers down to your ankles.”
There was a pause. Then the sound of fabric, a zip.
“Okay,” he said softly. “I’m ready.”
I shoved my trainers off and stripped out of my leggings and underwear, leaving myself bare from the waist down.
Then I crouched, reaching out into the dark to find Bodhi.
It took a second, fumbling hands brushing skin and air, but eventually I found his stomach, then his knees.
With a quiet laugh and his help, I swung my leg over his head without kneeing him in the face.
Now I was sprawled across his body, and I could feel the heat of him right in front of me. I couldn’t see his cock, and somehow that made it even more intoxicating. Was he leaking already? What did it look like? The questions barely registered. I was past the point of thinking.
I just wanted him in my mouth.
So I took him.
I sucked the head of his cock between my lips at the exact moment he did the same to me, and the vibration of his moan against my skin made me shudder.
I took him deeper just to hear it again.
My hands slid over his ass, squeezing, and he responded by lifting his hips, easing himself further into my mouth.
My throat protested at first, but I breathed through it, relaxing until the sensation settled. The weight of him on my tongue was incredible. Every time I stroked his shaft with it, he groaned and thrust deeper, and I rewarded him by squeezing his ass again, urging him on.
Before long, he was rutting into my mouth like he’d lost all restraint. My jaw ached. My knees burned against the hard floor. But I didn’t care. All I wanted was to taste him. To feel his cock twitch as he came. To swallow him and feel his body shake beneath my hands.
Keeping my focus was hard while he worked me over with the same ruthless attention. He licked and sucked at me like I was something precious, something irresistible, and I knew I wasn’t far off.
But I wanted him to finish first.
I cupped his balls gently. They were pulled tight, his ass already starting to spasm. I took as much of his length as I could, until my lips brushed his trimmed pubes and my nose pressed against his balls. Then I relaxed my throat and swallowed around him.
Bodhi moaned, long and raw and animal, and then he detonated.
His hips bucked, stealing my breath as warmth flooded the back of my throat. I pulled back just enough to taste it fully, groaning at the salt and musk as it hit my tongue. When I finally released him, my arms trembled as I held myself up.
Despite everything, despite just coming, he didn’t stop. He kept sucking me down, tongue dipping into my slit until my hips jerked. I shoved the cuff of my hoodie into my mouth, biting down hard to keep quiet.
“Fuck,” I sobbed around the fabric. “So close.”
That was all the encouragement Bodhi needed. His pace quickened, suction deepening, and when I felt his fingertip tease my hole, I shattered.
I came hard into his mouth, and he gripped my ass, holding me close as he swallowed every bit. He didn’t let up until the aftershocks turned sharp, then finally eased back.
I rolled off and collapsed beside him, my head somewhere near his hip. We lay there in the dark, breathing hard, the silence broken only by the sound of us slowly coming back to ourselves.
Then Bodhi laughed.
Soft at first, then bright and full, filling the cramped space with warmth. I laughed too, helplessly. Our fingers brushed and tangled together, hands clutching tight as our bodies cooled against the hard floor.
I knew we couldn’t stay there. We were in a maintenance cupboard in central Berlin, for fuck’s sake. He had an interview to get to. Reality would come knocking soon.
But for this one moment, none of that mattered.
Nothing but Bodhi’s hand in mine. Our laughter echoing softly above us.
“Fuck,” he said, still laughing. “I love pretending with you.”
I smiled so hard my cheeks hurt.
For a moment, we felt normal.
And it was wonderful.