Raven
Islip out of the house, closing the door and smirking that Blaze thinks he can keep me locked up.
Foolish alpha. Daega is here. I want to see him, but this meeting has been a long time coming, and it can’t wait a minute longer.
As I weave through the trees, inhaling the warm scent of the forest, the cool breeze catches my hair, twisting it out behind me like a banner.
The dark shape of the alpha I’m stalking moves just ahead of me.
We walk for twenty minutes or so, just long enough to have privacy, just long enough not to be discovered.
He turns, leaning up against a tree, smiling. He’s so damn beautiful, I smile back and feel this burn of happiness that’s almost painful.
I walk straight up to him, plastering myself against his strong, hard body, twining my arms around his neck and inhaling his scent.
Rose and sandalwood.
“Oh, my god, I missed you so much,” he utters in a ragged whisper. He sounds as desperate as I feel.
His lips find mine, and his large fingers pull my top up and yank it over my head, tossing it away. He palms my breasts roughly, pulling at my nipples the way I love.
“It’s been too long,” he says into my mouth.
“Far too long.” I curl my arms around his neck and pull myself up against him. “Rose, my Rose.”
“Raven,” he licks my bottom lip then bites it.
I moan and reach for my pants, undoing the button and then shimmying out of them and my underwear. I reach for his and, with one practiced move, get his pants open and my hand wrapped around his cock.
He hisses and ducks down, scraping his teeth over my breast, squeezing the other hard in his huge hand.
“The way you touch me,” he whispers. “I can’t get enough.”
I stroke him with one hand and reach between my legs, stroking my clit before I push two fingers into myself. I’m ready, but then I’m always ready for him.
“It’s been ages since we did it outside like this,” he murmurs and lifts me up. I reach between us and line him up.
“Do it. Do it fast. I can’t wait. I’ll die if I don’t have you.”
“So dramatic.”
I throw my head back and laugh. “I thought that was your thing?”
“No, give me snarky, intelligent, bitchy betas any day.”
“Aw, you say the sweetest things.”
“You’re talking too much,” he growls and lifts me before bringing me down hard. I gasp, arching against him. I run my hand over his head and guide him back to my breast.
“Oh, I missed these,” he murmurs.
“Show me how much.”
My nipples are hard, aching points, and I’ve got beard burn on my breasts when he pulls away and starts fucking me hard. I bounce on his cock, groaning, completely lost in him and his magnificent cock.
“I’m coming,” I call out and bury my face in his shoulder, biting but not enough to bond.
He gasps and stiffens, pulling me down with fingers that will probably leave bruises on my skin. He shudders and moans. I hold his sweaty body to me, unwilling to give him up yet.
But these moments can never last, and eventually, I tap his shoulder and loosen my legs. He reluctantly lets me slide down his body.
I stare up at him; the blue moonlight bathes one side of his face.
“Aaron?”
“You never call me, Aaron.”
I smile but turn away so he can’t see my face. I grab my clothes and pull them on piece by piece, mentally stepping away from him.
The sweat on my body is already turning cold. My heart, my soul, my blood. I hate this. So much.
He closes his eyes, his face pained, and I go still, staring at him, stricken.
If I could change it, I would. He deserves better.
So much better than stolen moments with me.
I step through the leaves, crunching them as I reach up and cup his cheek, my free hand on his chest where I can feel his heartbeat.
He told me once that his heart beat for me. I told him how foolish that was. That he would only get hurt. That it could never be.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” I whisper.
“This is the part I hate the most.” He opens his eyes, and his face is just one of misery. I stand up on my tiptoes and kiss him gently, softly.
“What part is that?”
“The part where we say goodbye, and you disappear on me again.”
That part. Yeah, me, too, Alpha, me, too.
I reach up and stroke his stubbled jaw. “I’m not going anywhere, not really. Now you have her.”
“You will, though; you never come out. It’s Merle and Kestrel. But not you. And when you do come out, we have to pretend. Raven…it’s killing me.”
I swallow hard, but I have to ignore what he’s saying. I have to.
“I know you like them, too,” I tease lightly. “Kest and Merle. Even Raptor and Jay.”
“I love you more,” he says stubbornly. “I love you.”
I chuckle but my heart hurts. So much. “We’re the same. You and I, we’re two halves of the same heart, and you know we have to protect them. But I am Merle and Kestrel and Raptor, and I’m even Jay. I will always be there with you.”
“No, you’re not. You’re my Raven. The brave, incredible beta who is the most fierce warrior. The one who is my world.”
“I think you’re thinking of Raptor,” I whisper.
“I’m not,” he insists crossly. “I’m talking about you, Raven.
The plan, that fucking plan. How many years have we been working on it?
It’s all coming together. And what happens if we win?
Will you stick around, or are you going to give up space and let yourself fade into the background?
Because…I can’t…I can’t see you and not see you. You have to be here.”
“No one will need me,” I say quietly because it’s true.
“Bullshit! I will need you!” he shouts.
“Shhh, okay. Calm down. Rose, I hear you.” I reach out, laying my fingers on his chest, trying to calm him. “I…” I stop and look away, tears prickling my eyes. “Let’s just get this over with. Once we have it all done, we can sort it all out.”
“I’m not giving you up.”
I cock my head to the side. “Merle, Kestrel, Raptor—they would fit you-”
“You fit me.”
“I’m not an omega.”
“I don’t care.”
“Rose,” I huff a laugh, stroking his cheek. “You are the most amazing alpha, and they will fall in love with you as easily as I did. You won’t be alone.”
He closes his eyes as if my words hurt him. “I’m not alone when I’m with you.”
“What about Daega?” I whisper. “How much longer are you going to fight his pull? Pretend you feel nothing because you have me and Merle and Kestrel and Raptor and this fucked up belief that you can’t have us all because no one would ever deserve to be that happy?”
His eyes open. “I’m only going to be happy if you are by my side.”
“Silly, stubborn alpha,” I whisper, but it comes out through my tears.
“Your alpha.”
“Rose, you need-”
“I need you. So, let’s get this finished so we can figure out a way to be together. Perhaps you can all schedule days?”
I give him that half smile that I only have for him. “You are such a puppy.”
“I am not.”
“You are fucking adorable, Rose.”
“I’m handsome.”
“Sexy.”
“All handsome and alpha-like.”
“My adorable, sexy, alpha puppy.”
He exhales roughly. “I love you.”
I lean up, standing on my toes so that I can press my lips to his. “I love you, too. One day,” I say hopefully, but trail off, “one day, I promise.” I clear my throat and step back. “Has Dove come out yet?”
He shakes his head.
I let out a relieved hiss. “Good. That’s, that’s very good news.” I look at him sharply. “What is it?”
“Are you sure this plan is a good idea? Don’t you think we should tell the others soon? At least, Kest?”
I shake my head. “No way. They can’t do what needs to be done.”
“I think you are underestimating them.”
“Rose, you promised me,” I growl. “I don’t need them panicking while I do this, and I can do this.”
“I did, and I meant it. I will protect them. All of them. No matter what or from who. I will find them and come for all of you if anything happens. No matter what. Eight hours, that’s all you get, and then I’m coming in, guns blazing.”
I grab hold of his hand and squeeze. “He’s going to be hunting us now; it’s been too long, and we should have gone back. He will want what I’ve stolen, and now he’ll have figured out that it’s me that took it. It’s only a matter of time now. Is the second location secured?”
“Yes. No one knows about it. If something happens, I will make sure I get whoever is in your body to that place.”
I exhale roughly. “And the trackers?”
“I’ve slipped them into everyone, just like you showed me.”
“And Pix?” I whisper.
“When the time is right, if it all goes to hell, I will get Pix and tell him your message.”
I let go and pace in front of him, gripping my hair. “I feel like I’ve forgotten something.”
“That’s because we have been at this for five years.”
I turn into his arms and bury my face in his chest. “Five years is too long. I want us to be free.”
“And we will be.”
“Don’t let them come with you. Don’t let them see what he’s going to do. If he gets us, you make sure those alphas don’t look at me.”
“Raven, please, baby.”
He begs; I’ve heard it a million times before.
“It’s time for me to go.”
“No, not yet. Please stay with me. Don’t do this.”
“We tried, Rose. We tried everything for five years. This is the only way. It’s all we have left. It’s not just my life on the line. Try to understand, it’s all of us. We can’t go back to that. I’m going to get us free. To give us a chance to live.”
Rose grabs me, pulling me against his chest hard. He holds me tight, and I can hear our hearts. For a moment, they are in sync, and then suddenly, they no longer are. We always only have moments.
It’s never going to be Rose and Raven.
That’s not the happy ending that we get.
I look up at him and kiss him hard, saying all the things I can’t say. All the things I wish we could do and have. The bright future that isn’t ours.
No, mine is a blood red hue over bleached bones and darkness.
I turn away from him, pulling free like I always do.
He follows me back to the cabin, a dark shadow at my back.
I refuse to look at him, afraid I will weaken.
At the last possible moment, I glance back, seeing his stricken face and feeling more pain that should be possible.
When I turn back to the cabin, I’m not Raven anymore, and I don’t know there’s an alpha in the woods, staring after me with his heart in his eyes.
I don’t know that he’s been my lover for five years. I don’t know I trust him above all others, and I don’t know that he’s the reason we’re all alive.