Chapter 62
Chapter Sixty-Two
KILLIAN
Going back to New York was the right decision. When I watch Heather with the other wives, it’s clear as day. She shows off her ring, and Bella places her hand over her heart.
“Three Reaper’s. I can’t even imagine.”
Bones visibly cringes.
“Nobody wants to imagine three of that pain in the ass.”
I can’t help the grin on my face when Heather corrects Bella.
“I know they look identical, but trust me, they are far from cookie-cutter. All three of them are their own unique person.”
She sees us for the different men we are because nothing gets by Heather. It’s something we’ve heard all our lives. We are identical, so people assume that we are the same in every way. I think that’s why this relationship works so well. We each give her something different that she needs.
Athena heads straight for Heather, holding Olivia in her arms. I follow her as she searches for a quiet spot out of the way of the others.
When Heather sits in the over-sized rocking chair, I pull a recliner close to her and take a seat beside her.
I hate the expression on her face, like she has the weight of the world on her shoulders.
I want to take that away from her, but this decision can only be hers.
We have discussed this and agreed none of us will interfere and influence her choice.
“I want to keep her, but I don’t think I’m ready for that kind of responsibility yet. Does that make me a terrible person?”
I stroke my fingers down her arm as she stares at her niece, her eyes filled with devastation that guts me.
“No, baby. It makes you a wonderful person. You have put a lot of thought into this decision. We have always known you’d make the right choice for both of you. Her life is important but so is yours. You matter too, Heather.”
Heather glances at me as Carter and Knox walk into the room.
“Do you want to hold her?”
I nod and reach for Olivia.
“Sure.”
I’ve never held an infant, so it’s a foreign experience as her little eyes flutter open. She stares at me with blue eyes that match Heather’s, and I swallow hard as I stare back.
“No matter what, baby, you have made sure she won’t have the life you did.”
When Olivia starts to cry, Knox pries her from my arms.
“You’re scaring her. Look at that ugly face looking back at her. Frightening.”
I get up so he can sit with her as I rib him.
“We’re identical, dickhead. If I’m ugly, so are you.”
Heather immediately scolds me.
“Killian! You cannot use that language around her.”
I’m tempted to remind her Olivia doesn’t know any words, but decide against it as Heather’s brows knit together with a scowl on her face. She really is fucking adorable when she’s pissed.
“Sorry.”
She nods and turns to Carter.
“Do you want to hold her?”
He shakes his head, his eyes wide as he speaks, his voice filled with self-hatred. My brother has come far since meeting Heather but he isn’t cured. He still struggles from time to time.
He stares at her, his eyes are filled with shock.
“No. I don’t want to hurt her.”
Carter laughs but there’s no humor behind it.
“Would you really trust me with her?” He says with disbelief.
She gets up and goes to him, climbing onto his lap.
“I trust you with everything, Carter. You are not going to hurt a baby. We both know that. I trust you, and maybe it’s time you trust yourself, too. If it’s too much, say your safe word and we will get her from you. If I thought you’d hurt her, I’d never let you hold her but I know you.”
He nods, but I see the uneasy emotion in his gaze. I agree with her, but understand his concerns as well.
Knox walks over to him and places the baby in his arms while Heather sits on the arm of the over-sized chair.
Carter stares at Olivia as if he’s witnessing a miracle. He lets out a shaky breath as he strokes a finger over her tiny hand.
She lifts her gaze to his and makes a small cooing noise as she closes her small hand around his thumb. Knox and I exchange an uneasy glance, both of us holding our breath.
“You’re like your aunt, aren’t you? A miracle. You don’t hurt, you heal.”
Tears fall down Carter's face as Knox and I both swipe the wetness from our cheeks. This is what our girl does. She heals because she loves without judgment. Carter needed acceptance from someone outside of the three of us. I think he always felt like we had to accept him because he’s our brother.
Heather gives it to him freely and allows him to work through his trauma without shame.
This is why Carter is marrying her legally. We knew it would be an impossible choice for her to make. We want her to be a Bonetti, but it doesn’t really matter to Knox and I who makes her one officially. For Carter, it matters. I think for him it’s further proof of that acceptance.