22
Sagan
“I’m sorry I walked away when you asked me not to do that,” he said when I found him sitting up on the castle’s outer wall. “And I’m sorry how—I didn’t even realize what was happening until my dragon was just—”
“I know,” I whispered as I moved next to him but didn’t sit down. “For the record, that’s how it happened for me. I just was—it was just happening and I was too stunned to like…”
He wiped his eyes and then reached back for me. I thought just for my hand and took his, but then I swallowed a yelp as he picked me up and sat me next to him, holding me against him.
“Why doesn’t your dragon like me?” he asked, his voice cracking.
“She doesn’t dislike you. You worry her,” I answered honestly, leaning my head against his chest. “She’s worried about how being with you would traumatize me after Kole. Your family—Vex. It won’t ever just be done or over.” I cleared my throat.
He figured it out and flinched. “She’s mad I failed you and your uncle handled things when I promised to.”
“Dragons aren’t always fair,” I reminded him.
“No, but she’s not wrong either. I did fail and—I thought…” He shook his head and kissed my hair. “I’ll accept him. I will. My dragon just—he wants to be loved by your dragon too and—”
“Onyx, please, you’re jumping ahead and…” I sighed and scrubbed my face before turning to see him. He wouldn’t look at me at first until I touched his face. “I shouldn’t tell you, but there’s serious shit with his family.” He frowned and I nodded. “I can’t gossip about the other families and—”
“That’s really not fair when everyone knows what’s working against us,” he grumbled.
He was right, so I gave him a look that clearly it was between us, glad when he nodded.
“Berlinger’s—Berg’s mother hated mine,” I told him quietly.
“Like despised her, and there as a problem at the funeral because she kept saying Father was the only loss. She actually stole stuff and Maple had to—we found out reviewing the security footage. She actually stole some of my mother’s stuff in her sitting room during the funeral feast.”
Onyx’s mouth fell open. “Well, for fuck’s sake. And then they had their son be part of this? Not like a nephew or…” He sighed when I nodded again. “Yeah, that’s awesome for you.”
I snorted. “Oh yeah, even better when she had a lot to say about me being just as petty as my mother for starting problems over some trinkets like she took the shampoo out of the rooms.”
“What did she take?” he wondered.
I opened my mouth but then closed it. “I honestly didn’t get into it all.
I know it was worth millions.” I snickered when his mouth fell open again.
“Yeah, she stole millions in stuff from Mother’s private sitting room that—she had a corrupt guard.
She doesn’t think we know that yet, but some weren’t just in the elders’ pockets, but Alpha families’ too. ”
“What a fucking mess. That’s an awkward introduction.”
“We said like two words,” I drawled, nodding yet again when he seemed hesitant. “I’m not even kidding that we basically greeted each other and I welcomed him to the castle and we ate. That was it. The tension was through the roof and he looked like he wanted to bolt.”
He hugged me tightly and kissed my hair. “I’m sorry I made this harder on you. I just…”
“You didn’t. I’m sorry my dragon—she’ll come around.” I decided to snitch on Iris. “She liked when yours was silly. We’re queen and you’re a pretty commanding guy. That makes her nervous given everything else that’s going on.”
He leaned back and searched my eyes. “And you? How do you feel about my level of assertiveness?” He smiled when my face flushed.
Then he was kissing me.
I kissed him back for a few minutes, but when his hand moved to my breast, I reminded him that we were supposed to be at a meeting. That I was leading.
“Thanks for coming to find me,” he whispered against my lips before standing with me.
Because no one had before. That was what I’d missed when focusing on my own issues with people walking away from me.
I swallowed loudly and gripped his forearms tightly as I stared at his chest. “I will do my best to come after you. I hear you.” I let out a shaky breath.
“I showed my parents once that I was different—powers in a way that’s not…
They walked away. Mother just cried and walked away.
Father—they didn’t talk to me for weeks. I can’t…”
“Me too,” he rasped and hugged me to him. “I walked away though when I saw their reaction and they never came after me. When I came back, they pretended it never happened and things were never the same between Vex and me. That was the day it all changed and…”
“Yeah,” I admitted, blinking back tears. “They were never my parents after that, but my king and queen.”
“I will always come back and never ignore what happened,” he swore to me.
“I won’t ever ignore what happened and will try to come after you.”
We were quiet as we soaked up what was going on, tense but not really awkward. He cleared his throat and kissed my hair again. “Part of me worries this will throw salt in both of our wounds, but I think it could heal us—having someone who understands this specific wound that most wouldn’t.”
“Maybe.” I wasn’t sure about that, but I didn’t know he was wrong either.
We headed to the meeting, but right before we would have arrived he stopped me and gave me a soft kiss. “I’m coming over tonight.”
Iris chuffed, hating when he acted like that.
I was more playful about it. “Depends on how you behave. I don’t think you deserve to spend the night when everyone will know it staying here.” I snorted when he looked busted, clearly wanting to make it clear Joris wasn’t the only one I was close with.
It wasn’t as controlling as it might seem, but he was—okay, maybe it was but… Actually, I didn’t have a fucking clue. I didn’t have enough personal socialization for this type of thing, and I’d been in an abusive relationship before without even knowing it.
So really, I shouldn’t decide much.
Or be in a relationship until I healed from what I’d read.
I swallowed a snort picturing all the Alphas losing their minds if I announced that and put the contest on hold for my emotional health. Seriously, they wouldn’t give two fucks. Even the “nice” ones.
There was so much to handle since the meeting had been pushed back and more had been added to the agenda that we were going to work through dinner. Right before it was going to be served, we decided to take a quick break and stretch our legs—whatever.
“You have a delivery, Your Majesty,” one of the guards informed me. “A large one.”
I immediately perked up thinking it was from the small shop I’d visited after my dinner with Zev. “Bring it in.”
He blinked at me. “In here?”
“Yes, of course, I could use the happy.” And yummy sugar.
Fine, I’d have to share, but I was fine with that if some of the Alphas went to the shop.
I needed a full rundown meeting with Myriam of where I was financially after all the funds were seized by the bank from elders now, but it couldn’t be too bad if she’d gotten the fancy credit card, right?
Even with all the construction and… It made my brain hurt.
But I needed to give her a few days because the first reimbursement payment had been approved. Everything was submitted to the Alphas of expenses the royal family had been paying that other countries received funds from the government for and all of them had admitted it was ridiculous.
They used their local taxes for upkeep on the Alpha compounds and more. To screw the leader of Thovudin that way was… Yeah, no more.
So that income was going to start trickling in.
Yes, trickling in because while we would make it work going forward, we didn’t currently have piles of money not being used by the government to repay my family. Someone immediately proposed raising taxes and it was difficult to control both Iris and Eloise.
Because they hadn’t suggested it to help. They’d wanted me to fall into the stupidest trap ever and make the public hate me more.
Yeah, I wouldn’t forget that, and I gave that Alpha a look that he’d made a mistake. A big one.
Clearly, he wasn’t happy I’d handled his issues with the drought without him. Well, he shouldn’t have been an asshole.
I turned when there were several murmurs and my eyes went wide when three massive flower arrangements were carried in.
“Why are you bringing them in here?” Onyx demanded of the guards as he came jogging over. “They’re for her room or study.”
“You sent me flowers?” I asked, glancing between him and the gorgeous arrangements.
He cleared his throat and looked around before moving closer. “My dragon wanted to apologize and you—the last ones died. I want you to always have some sort of—you like flowers and I want to learn which are your favorites.”
There was a loud snort behind us. “Someone’s trying to get laid tonight.”
“Over the line,” someone snapped and a few people agreed as Onyx chuffed like he was going to pound someone.
But then everyone froze, like went eerily quiet and I wasn’t sure why.
Myriam sighed when I glanced at her. “You have the best poker face in the world—legendary when it’s politics or being a royal, but you—we need to work on hiding your personal feelings.”
My hands immediately went to my cheeks that were fire dragon hot and I was sure my ears were too even. I was about to grab one of the arrangements and hurry out of there, but Thorn was suddenly in front of me chuffing.
“You haven’t been with him,” he muttered, grabbing my wrists and pulling them away from my face.
“What?” I gasped and yanked my hands away.
“That’s not your business,” Onyx snapped and shoved him away from me. “Why do you keep embarrassing her?”
Thorn didn’t even cut him a glance. “We all just saw it. You’ve not had sex.”