Chapter Thirty-Five
A Very Special Gift
“Oscar.”
“That little girl ain’t had anyone to protect her and love her the way Onyx would. They’ve already formed a bond. See?”
I gazed at him with wide eyes. “But you love that horse.”
Oscar looked pained.
“I do. ’Course, I do.” He squared his shoulders and nodded, as if he’d made a decision. “But I feel like…like Lizzie needs her more’n I do.”
I stared at him, my heart swelling at his generosity and his courage, to be willing to give up an animal he loved for the happiness of a little girl that he’d only ever met a month ago.
“Oscar,” I said, my voice thick.
He held up his hand, and I noticed ’twasn’t exactly steady.
“Now, Jimmy, I know we paid a lot for her, and I surely do appreciate you buyin’ her for me.
I will miss her very, very much. But”—he nodded again at Lizzie and the mare—“I can’t bear it.
If you can bear it, go ahead, and I’ll meet you down the street.
” He met my gaze with a pleading one. “But I can’t do it. ”
I didn’t say anything. The others were quiet, too.
“You sure you want to do this, Oscar?” I asked, my voice low. “We won’t be able to come back for her or that girl’s heart’ll break twice as much than it would if we take Onyx now.”
“I know.”
“Oscar,” Maggie said, “it’s mighty kind of you to gift Lizzie that horse, but I’m sure we can get another one somehow. Miss June promised that she’d handle it.”
“Yes, but horses can be finicky, and at least this way, I’d know the children had a good, kind horse to ride. And I’d know that Onyx was loved and cherished, even if ’tweren’t by me.”
His voice broke, and I reached out, tucking him against my chest. I wanted to tell him he was the kindest, most generous person I’d ever met, but I couldn’t speak because I was so overcome, and there were so many people around. So I simply held him tight and kissed him on the cheek.
“You’re gonna have to ride behind me on Dixie, then.”
Oscar pulled away and brushed at his face, grinning, though his lips trembled.
“Now, you know, that ain’t never been a hardship, Jimmy,” he said. “That way I can keep an eye on you, make sure you don’t fall and injure yourself again. And if I get tired of it, maybe we can load some of the smaller packages onto Dixie, and I can ride Poke.”
“We ain’t got no saddle for Poke. And we gotta leave Onyx’s fancy saddle for Lizzie and the others.”
His eyes flew wide. “Hey! Remember how Mr. Morris said he’d got Onyx for his granddaughter, and that was why the saddle was so fancy?”
“Yeah, I remember.”
“Well, maybe this horse and this saddle were meant for Lizzie all along.”
I smiled at his sweet, excited face. “Maybe.”
Cal came up to Oscar and, without saying a word, she wrapped him in her arms and held him for a long time. She whispered something in his ear, and Oscar nodded.
Finally, she pulled away and took Peter’s hand…and Samuel’s. “Well, let’s all go and tell Lizzie the good news.”
Teddy gave a loud bark when he saw us and romped o’er to dance about, his tail wagging. Lizzie held on to Onyx e’en harder and hid her face in the mare’s mane.
“Lizzie,” Maggie said, as she stepped forward, putting a hand on Oscar’s shoulder to stay him. “Get off that horse. Oscar and Jimmy need to leave now.”
We were all a bit impressed when, instead of clutching tighter, Lizzie forced herself away from the grazing horse with an incredible amount of will for a seven-year-old.
“Yes’m,” she said in a tight voice. “I already said goodbye.”
“Lizzie, Oscar has something to tell you,” Maggie said, gesturing for him to approach.
Lizzie gazed at Oscar, her face a paroxysm of stifled grief, as Oscar came forward and knelt in front of her.
“Now, Lizzie,” Oscar said, in his kindest voice, “if I’m gonna leave you this horse, you gotta promise me to take real good care of her.”
She blinked and nodded, though I reckoned she didn’t e’en understand what Oscar was saying. Sure enough, she gave him and Maggie and Cal a confused look.
“Wh—at?”
Oscar smiled at the child, and I could hardly believe what this man was about to do. I could hardly believe that he was my husband and loved me with the same heart that must be breaking right about now.
“I want you to have this horse, Lizzie. I want you to have Onyx as your own.”
Lizzie still seemed in shock, for she only nodded, her mouth open and her eyes wide in her dear, tearstained face.
“But you gotta share her with Peter and with Sam. She’s for all of you, really, and she’s for Maggie, too, so she can help out on the farm. So you gotta share her, all right?”
Lizzie was nodding now, as fresh tears coursed down her cheeks. Then she smiled so wide I thought her face might split apart.
“I’ll look after her, Oscar, I promise! And I’ll share her—a’course, I will.”
She launched herself into Oscar’s arms. She hugged him with a ferocity that came from a desperate, lonely place.
Then she ran to Onyx and threw herself around the horse’s neck.
The mare snorted in surprise and sniffed Lizzie’s head, nosing at the strands of hair as if she were trying to figure out if she could eat them.
“Oh, Onis! I get to keep you! I get to keep you! I love you so much!”
Oscar walked over to them. He stared at the mare for a moment, then rubbed her whiskered chin and placed his lips against the white stripe on her broad face, as Onyx huffed a breath and pushed her head against him. Then Oscar stepped back and took a deep breath.
He went and untied the holster that held his revolver from the fancy saddle. He ran one hand reverently o’er the tooled seat of Onyx’s saddle, then brought the holster o’er to tie onto Dixie’s saddle, near where the rifle was affixed in its leather holder.
“All right, Jimmy. Let’s go.” His voice broke on those last words.
I tousled little Lizzie’s hair and kissed the top of her head, before mounting Dixie and holding my hand out for Oscar. I hauled him up behind me. He encircled me with his arms right away, and I reckoned he was doing his best to be strong.
’Twas nice to have him so close, and I squeezed his hand with mine to give him solace. The day was cool enough that riding together wouldn’t be uncomfortable, and Dixie could handle the extra load, especially since Oscar was a wisp of a fella.
“Bye, then,” I said, giving a wave to all the folks we’d come to love and respect o’er the past several weeks, then turned Dixie quick to get out of there before I lost my own composure.
“Bye!” Peter shouted, after we’d gone a few paces. “Don’t wait too long to come back, now!” he said, as Teddy yapped and growled.
Neither of us turned to look, but I raised my hand and gave Peter a backward wave as Oscar tightened his hold around my waist.
I didn’t know when or how, but we surely would be back one day.
* * * *
By the time we’d got away, the sun was well past its midpoint, and I figured we only had about six hours of travel left in the day.
We were awful quiet for the first little while.
I’d never ever needed or wanted to have children in my life, but I couldn’t deny that these three had burrowed their way into my heart, and I knew Oscar felt the same.
“Jimmy,” he said after a little while, “do you think ’twas a good thing I did, giving Onyx to Lizzie?”
I guided Dixie around an outcrop of rock as Oscar clutched my waist to keep steady.
“Oscar,” I said in a chiding tone, “I think ’twas the most generous and unselfish thing I ever saw anybody do. And I think that little girl will love you forever, and she’ll take mighty good care of that horse for you. I reckon you just changed her life.”
“Really?”
“I do. Truly. And I”—I cleared my throat and dropped a hand from the reins to cover Oscar’s—“I’m mighty proud of the man you’ve become, Oscar Yates.”
Oscar gave a sigh that sounded half like a sob, and I reckoned ’twas hitting him that he wouldn’t see Onyx again for a very long time, if ever. I continued speaking so he didn’t have to reply.
“I’d like to think I had a hand in it, but I reckon you’ve always been the kindest man I’ve ever been lucky enough to be with. This proves it.”
“Thank you,” he whispered. “I feel like—I’m gonna miss that horse, but I feel real good knowin’ I was able to do somethin’ big for someone.”
“Oh, Oscar,” I said, stopping Dixie and turning in the saddle to look at him. “You already did somethin’ big for lots of people, including me. But I know how much you love that horse and givin’ her away was the most amazing thing I seen anybody ever do.”
Oscar nodded against my back, rubbing his forehead against the leather of my jacket, and I got Dixie moving again. I figured Oscar needed to have a good cry, and sure enough, he shuddered and started to let those powerful emotions out in quiet, sniffly sobs.
I kept my hand o’er his and rubbed it, giving him the comfort that I could. And I kept talking, because I knew he was probably embarrassed about giving way to his intense feelings.
“Don’t you forget that I spent a lot of years surrounded by the most selfish, awful men, who did terrible things to people for the amusement of it.
To see what I did—why, you’ve given me back the faith that people can be good, and generous, and kind, and that means a lot to me. You’ll never know how much.”
Oscar nodded against my back, gave a louder sob and tightened his hold, as if he needed to anchor himself in a world that seemed unsteady again.
And we rode out of Telegraph Creek under the intensity of the afternoon sun, making our way for home.