Chapter 2
Faye decided she did fancy another hour in bed, although she imagined she wouldn’t get back to sleep.
‘Where are you going?’ Jake asked.
‘Back to bed.’
‘Faye. Tell me what happened between you and your father.’
Faye struggled with indecision. She shouldn’t tell him. She was breaking her own rules, and she knew she would regret it. Once the precedent was set, once the door was closed on a purely professional relationship, she didn’t know where it would lead and how it would affect their working relationship. But had that line already been crossed when she had let him into her private life to babysit? Of course it had. Completely against her better judgement, Faye sat down. ‘She’s only got her grandfather, you know.’
‘I know,’ Jake tossed the cushion to one side.
Faye looked at him a long moment. ‘I guess she tells you everything.’
‘Pretty much.’ Jake shrugged. ‘She …’
‘… talks a lot.’ Faye glanced at him. ‘I suppose you’re wondering why my dad and I can’t get along enough so that she can at least see him.’
Jake listened.
Faye studied her fingernails intently. ‘My father, Patrick, thinks I should let Natty’s father see her. He doesn’t agree with my decision to cut him out of our lives completely.’ Faye wondered what Jake would think of that.
‘So, this is his rather grown-up way of emphasising that point, is it – shutting you out of his life?’ Jake shook his head. ‘The stupidity of some people. Sorry, I shouldn’t call your father stupid. I don’t even know the man. But I know one thing – he has a fantastic daughter, and granddaughter, and he should take you in his arms, and hold you both tight, because you never know—’ Jake stopped and swallowed.
‘Jake?’
‘You never know if … when something might happen, and you never get that chance again to hold someone you love in your arms.’
Faye sat forward in her chair and realised the conversation had stopped being about her and Natty. She knew who Jake was talking about – Eleanor.
She reached out and touched his hand. ‘We’re not going anywhere, Natty and I.’
Jake placed a gentle hand on top of hers. ‘You’d better not.’
‘I’m making sure of it – especially where my daughter is concerned.’
Jake was studying her hand. ‘What do you mean?’
Faye withdrew her hand and stood up.
‘Are you off back to bed?’
She shook her head, and walked over to close the lounge door. ‘I swear my daughter’s hearing is superhuman. I just want to make sure she doesn’t wake up and hear what I say next. I don’t want to scare her.’
‘Scare her?’ Jake frowned. ‘Is everything okay?’
‘Yes – it is now, since I left Yousaf – or rather, ran away and took Natty with me. You see, my father does not know why I walked out on him. We seemed so happy. We were so happy, until—’ Faye took a breath.
Jake leaned forward in his chair. ‘What is it – tell me! Did he hurt you?’ Jake swivelled his head to the door. ‘Did he hurt—’
‘Oh, no, nothing like that. Yousaf was the gentlest soul you could ever imagine.’
‘Then why did you walk out?’
‘As I said before, when we finished our courses, and Natty was born, he wanted us to return with him to Oman.’
‘But you didn’t want to go.’
Faye shook her head. ‘I just couldn’t imagine leaving England and bringing up my daughter there. I begged Yousaf to stay here, but he was torn. I think he came from a wealthy family in Oman, but there was still the pressure as the eldest son to look after his extended family. When I said I wasn’t going to go with him, at first he stayed, but then I think he was being pressured by his family to go back.’
‘Did he tell them about you and Natty?’
‘Yes. He told them I didn’t want to go and live in Oman. Then he asked if he could take Natty for a holiday to Oman.’
‘He what?’
‘I would have gone with him during the holidays, to meet his family, but he didn’t want to wait until the school holidays. He wanted to show them his beautiful daughter.’
‘Did he take her?’
‘I didn’t know how to be away from her for a week, and voiced my concerns to my father, but he said to let him take her to meet the family. He said it might be one of the few chances Yousaf’s family got to see her. So I agreed.’ Faye swallowed. ‘I nearly lost her, Jake.’
‘What are you talking about?’
‘If I hadn’t overheard him on the phone …’
Jake got up and walked over, kneeling in front of her chair. ‘What happened?’
I was home early from work. There had been an incident at school, a burst pipe flooding several classrooms. The school had to close for the afternoon. Yousaf had been due to collect her from the nursery that afternoon and go straight to the airport. I wanted … needed to say goodbye to her before they left, but he’d said it was the only flight time he could find, and that meant I’d be at work when they left. It was not ideal at all. I’d also been so, so worried about her going all that way without me. I was getting seriously cold feet. The flood at school, getting off work early, just seemed to be fated. I raced back home, and before I even opened the front door, I could hear my little Natty’s chatter. They were still there.’
Faye took a breath before she continued. ‘I crept indoors, wanting it to be a surprise. I knew Yousaf wouldn’t be happy if I changed my mind about Natty going. The flights were booked. But I had checked online and discovered there was still availability on a flight during the next school holiday – he’d said there wasn’t, and I’d believed him. It didn’t sit right with me that he’d lied about it. Although I didn’t think that at the time; I just thought he’d made an innocent error when he’d searched for the flights.’
‘That wasn’t the case?’
Faye vehemently shook her head. ‘When I walked in, he was on his mobile in the lounge, calling for a taxi to pick them up and take them to the airport. I glanced in the lounge. He didn’t see me, but I saw Natty sitting happily on his knee, playing with a doll. I saw the plane tickets on the sideboard. I picked them up, and was about to walk into the lounge to tell him he’d better not forget the tickets. Then I happened to notice something odd. They were not return tickets.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘They were one-way tickets.’
Faye could tell by the bemused look on Jake’s face that he didn’t get it.
‘He was leaving for Oman, and he wasn’t coming back.’
‘But he was taking your daughter.’
‘Exactly.’
It took a moment for Jake to take this in, Faye could tell. She watched his expression.
‘Are you saying he was going to kidnap her?’
‘I suppose kidnap is a strong word. After all she was … is his daughter. But he’d planned it all along, to leave and take Natty with him. He must have made a decision that he was returning to Oman and never coming back. He already knew I wouldn’t go with him, so he’d decided he was taking her without me. He knew I’d never, ever let that happen, so that’s why he’d planned the trip, supposedly just a visit to take Natty to meet his relatives.’
Jake looked dumbfounded. ‘So, why did he tell you? He could have just collected her from nursery one day and left.’
‘My father was a police officer. He’s retired now, but he still has connections on the force. Yousaf obviously realised he risked the possibility that if I discovered she was missing, someone might catch up with him and Natty before he could board a flight.’
Faye swallowed. ‘He’d obviously thought it through and planned to leave when I was at work, just in case I got cold feet and didn’t want Natty to go with him. To be honest, I don’t know why I let him talk me into it.’
They fell silent until Jake said, ‘How long ago was that?’
‘Five years ago.’ Faye shuddered. ‘Even now, it turns my stomach – the thought that if I hadn’t left work early that day because of a burst pipe, I might never have seen my daughter again.’
Jake said in a small voice, ‘What about if he comes back?’
‘We moved house. I changed schools. I took Natty out of her nursery and put her with a childminder instead until she started school.’
Jake nodded.
‘I’m always looking over my shoulder, afraid he’ll return.’
‘That’s terrible.’
‘I know. The worst part was that he was such a lovely, gentle man. I think he was pressured by his family. I realised they’d always come first. Natty asks after her father from time to time. She was too young when he left to remember him. But he can’t be a part of her life. You understand that – don’t you?’
‘Of course I do.’ Jake reached for her hand. ‘So, what happened – did you confront him?’
Faye remembered to breathe. ‘No, I did not. I remembered standing in the doorway, watching him cradling Natty affectionately, thinking that I must have it all wrong. But then when he saw me in the doorway, I knew. He didn’t smile, or ask me what had happened, why I’d returned from work early. All he did was just sit there, looking guilty.’ Faye sighed. ‘I just handed him his ticket, and took Natty in my arms. I didn’t have to say anything. He knew I knew. The taxi turned up. I said goodbye. He promised he’d be back, said it was just a visit. But I saw his eyes flicker to his daughter when he said he’d be coming back. Of course he would. To fetch what was his. As soon as he got in the taxi, I was already planning to leave the house, my job, Natty’s nursery and move on somewhere that he and his family wouldn’t find us.’
‘Why didn’t you tell your father all this?’
‘I did. He just said I was being paranoid and that there was no way Yousaf would do that.’
‘He said that?’
‘Yes. I even told him about the phone conversation I’d overheard between Yousaf and his father. In hindsight, I realised what they were talking about. Of course, I could only hear one side of the conversation – but I heard him say: Yes, of course I’m bringing her with me. Do you think I’d leave her behind? ’ Faye stared at Jake. ‘I thought, after several years together, he was staying in England for good.’ Faye rubbed her tired eyes. ‘Sorry, I shouldn’t have told you all this.’
‘Actually, I think you most definitely should have.’
Faye looked at him questioningly.
Jake continued, ‘What if some guy turns up at your house, god forbid, claiming to be Natty’s father, while I’m babysitting?’
Faye saw his point. She said softly, ‘I think you remind Natty of him.’
‘Who – Yousaf?’
‘Yes – in a good way. I know I said she doesn’t really remember him. She was too young when he left. But you are gentle and caring towards her just like he was.’
‘I’m sorry she can’t see her father.’
‘You do understand?’
‘Of course I do. I’m just sorry that your father doesn’t.’
‘So am I. Of course, it didn’t help that some time later, Yousaf wrote to me. I wasn’t interested in getting any communication from him, but because he didn’t have my address, he had written care of my father.’
‘Oh dear.’
‘Yes, precisely. My father passed on the letter. And I gave him strict instructions not to tell Yousaf my new address.’ Faye sighed. ‘Of course, the fact that my father found out I hadn’t told Yousaf my new address didn’t help our relationship either. I did read the letter, though. It was basically one long apology. Yousaf said he didn’t know what he had been thinking, and it had been all his overbearing parents’ idea, which was obviously no excuse for him going through with it, but he wanted desperately to make things right.’
They fell silent again. Faye didn’t think there was any point going back to bed now. She stood up. ‘I’m going to get dressed.’
Jake was already dressed. He had slept on the couch in his clothes. He said, ‘Yes, I’d better head off.’ He paused. ‘It is a shame you can’t patch things up with your dad – for Natty’s sake. She’s a great kid, and they’re both missing out.’
Faye was at the lounge door with her hand on the doorknob. She turned to look at him across the room.
He quickly added, ‘Not that it’s down to you to repair the relationship. Your father is being completely unreasonable.’
Faye breathed a heavy sigh. ‘Actually, there is probably some truth in what he said about me being paranoid.’
‘I don’t agree at all. The guy was going to take your kid. I know Natty is his too, but it’s clear what his intentions were, to take her away from you, forever. You’d probably never have seen her again.’
‘The thought of that … it’s why I cut my father out of her life too.’
Jake looked at her, bemused. ‘But you said—’
‘Yeah, it’s not the case that he doesn’t want to see her. My father really liked Yousaf, and he still doesn’t believe that Yousaf wanted to take Natty back to Oman with him for good. I’ve always been afraid that Yousaf might contact my father, and …’ She trailed off.
Jake frowned. ‘And …?’ he prompted.
Faye sighed. ‘Sometimes I do think I’m paranoid. I had all sorts of crazy scenarios go round in my head, like what if Yousaf came back to England, and they agreed to meet up behind my back with Natty. I know it sounds crazy and far-fetched, but I couldn’t risk it.’
‘Faye, I understand completely.’ Jake stared at her solemnly. ‘It’ll never happen again, Faye – not on my watch.’
Faye held Jake’s gaze. She said, ‘He still gets in contact, leaves me phone messages.’
‘Your father?’
Faye nodded. ‘It’s always the same, suggesting we could still go back to the way things are, with him seeing Natty, if only I’d stop being so silly. He just doesn’t get it. Until he accepts my side of the story, I can’t do that.’
‘I need a drink,’ Jake said suddenly.
‘Bit early for alcohol.’
Jake laughed at the joke.
Faye said, ‘You want your coffee strong and black.’
He smiled. ‘You can read me like an open book.’
Not quite , Faye thought. He hadn’t opened up about his late wife, and she didn’t expect him to. I’ll go and make that coffee.’