Chapter 31
Chapter Thirty-One
Working isn’t as fun as I imagined. I thought it would be glamorous. Maybe not the work itself, but definitely the independence. I’m not having a great time.
My shoulder and back muscles are sore from cleaning, and I fight back a wince as I stick my mop in the water bucket. I need to refill it soon, the water a murky gray, but I want to finish this hallway first. How long has it been since the floors were last mopped? Too long, I’d say.
Voices travel up the hallway, and I shiver as I recognize the one belonging to June. She hates me. She hasn’t outwardly done or said anything, but she never misses an opportunity to give me a dirty look or cutting glare.
I finish the area I’m working on, thankfully without encountering June, and wrap up my last few tasks for the day.
The hospital doesn’t see much traffic. A total of six shifters came in today, four of whom were children in need of routine physicals.
The fifth was a young man with mysterious injuries I’m not privy to the details of.
Something is going on with the shifters.
Caleb has admitted to trouble with HPAW, and I suspect this was related to it.
Doctor Greg ushered the man into the back before I could get a good look at him, and the nurse assigned to him has been tight-lipped.
I went as far as to eavesdrop on her conversation with June, but she didn’t spill any details.
The fifth visitor was a pregnant female in need of an ultrasound.
I tried not to make eye contact with her. Caleb has confirmed that I’m not pregnant, and seeing that woman had shame filling every pore and crevice of my person. I was wrong to do what I did, and I don’t think I’ll ever be able to forgive myself for it.
I doubt Caleb will ever forgive me, either. I don’t blame him.
Frigid air whips my hair around my head the second I leave the building. I hate the weather here. I thought I knew cold, but this is ridiculous. I’m surprised there isn’t snow covering the ground, but I assume we’re only a few weeks away—if not days.
A particularly large gust of wind has my teeth chattering, and I yank my coat tighter around myself as I climb inside Caleb’s car. I start the engine, but I don’t move. I worry my hands around the steering wheel instead, procrastinating.
I don’t want to go home.
My apartment is lonely, and I’m tired of being alone. Doctor Greg is the only shifter who is nice, but I doubt he wants to spend his free time with me. He’s a middle-aged man with a mate and a gaggle of children. He has better things to do with his time.
I should return home. My stack of books is calling to me, specifically the two on marks. I shouldn’t let yesterday’s tender moment with Caleb affect me, but it has. The sad truth is I want to fix our bond. I’m desperate for it.
Caleb’s mark is darkening with each passing day, and I don’t have the luxury of time.
The drive to my apartment is borderline painful. I chew at my bottom lip, continuing even as I taste blood. I bite harder as I turn onto the street, but instead of parking in one of the empty spots in front of the building, I turn right and make my way down a road I most definitely shouldn’t.
This is a bad idea.
I continue down the road, making turns I memorized long ago, until I pull into Caleb’s winding driveway. There’s a light on inside, but I can’t see through the sheer cream curtains covering the windows.
Caleb is home.
My hands tremble as I park and make the short walk to the front door, but I don’t dare to knock. I lift my arm but quickly drop it back by my side. This is a mistake. I step back, my shoulders sagging.
Caleb pulls open the door.
He’s wearing only a pair of loose sleep pants, and he hardly seems affected by the cold as he steps onto his porch and looks around. His gaze flickers from me to the car, then back to me.
I’m expecting questions.
“I know you hate me,” I start. “I just…” I pause, my voice trailing off.
Caleb steps aside and jerks his chin toward the doorway. “Come on.”
He follows me inside, silent as I tug off my coat and shoes. He wordlessly hangs my jacket inside the closet, an action he’s done dozens of times, but I never took much notice of it until now.
We stare at one another, and I cross my arms as I debate my next move. I didn’t think this through. Caleb cocks his head to the side, his nostrils flaring. I’m sure I smell like the hospital’s cleaner and dirty mop water.
“Are you alone?” I ask. I can’t see anybody from where I stand, but I’m not looking to humiliate myself in front of anybody but Caleb.
He shrugs. “Why does it matter?”
Coming here was a mistake. I begin to turn, fully intending to leave, but Caleb halts me with a firm grip on my bicep. His brown eyes are boring holes into the sides of my face, impossible to ignore.
“I’m alone,” he admits. “And if this is your subtle way of seeing if I’m entertaining other women, the answer is no. There’s nobody else.”
I ignore how happy that makes me. “Can we pretend?” I ask.
Caleb frowns. “Pretend?”
I nod. “Just for tonight? Please.”
Caleb rolls his shoulders. Despite his unruly hair and wrinkled clothing, he looks good. It’s those damn shifter genes. I can’t say the same for myself. My face is breaking out, from stress or hormones, I can’t tell, and the center of my bottom lip is split.
He gestures upstairs. “Go on, then.”
It’s not a warm invitation, but I’m just desperate enough to take it. My limbs are heavy, and I hug my arms around myself as I head upstairs and into his bedroom. Caleb follows, but his silence speaks volumes.
I curl my fingers into the skin of my biceps as I step inside. It physically hurts to be in here after what I did, and the memory of his blood pooling on the floor and soaking into the wood flooring haunts me.
“You have new sheets,” I say.
I snap my jaw shut. Of course he has new sheets. His were stained with blood.
Caleb lingers in the doorway. “Shower,” he orders. “You reek.”
My cheeks flush. He’s never spoken to me like this. I may have made mistakes, but I have some semblance of dignity. I didn’t come here to be insulted.
“Why do you come in so much contact with Greg?”
I pause. “What?”
“His scent is practically oozing off you,” Caleb continues. “Did you fucking full-body rub up against him or something?”
It takes a moment for his words to register. When he says I reek, is he referring to Doctor Greg’s scent?
“I—” I turn, facing Caleb. “I suppose I brush up against him occasionally while we’re working. He lingers in doorways, and some of the hallways are narrow. It’s not intentional.”
Caleb’s frown deepens. “Don’t come to me smelling of another man again. You won’t be welcomed inside.” He licks his lips. “Now go shower.”
He’s jealous. It’s the last thing I expected from him, and I fight back a smile as I escape into his bathroom. Caleb can pretend to hate me all he wants, but these little moments are telling. I’ll take my victories where I can get them.
I stare in the bathroom mirror for a long while after showering. Caleb snuck inside and placed a change of clothing on the sink. They’re his, and they swallow me. I fiddle with the hem of his shirt before stepping out of the bathroom.
Caleb’s sitting on the edge of the bed, his head in his hands.
I rock back on my heels as he runs his fingers through his hair and straightens up. His breath hitches at the sight of me in his clothing, and he doesn’t bother hiding his stare as he flicks off the bedroom light and slides into bed.
I settle beside him, my heart pounding.
“Why did you come here, Evelyn?”
“I miss you.”
We lie side by side, staring at the ceiling. Will Caleb push me away if I try cuddling? I shift, adjusting the shirt riding up my hips, before rolling onto my side with my back facing Caleb. He doesn’t react, and I scoot back until my butt brushes his arm. It’s a clear invitation.
He doesn’t take it.
“Ten women went missing from a smaller pack last year,” he whispers instead. “We now suspect HPAW abducted those women.” He drapes a heavy arm over my waist and hugs me against his chest. “I suspect they…”
His voice trails off. I wait, but he doesn’t continue.
“You suspect what?” I push.
Caleb gives me a tight squeeze but otherwise doesn’t respond. He slides his hand up the front of my shirt until his palm rests over my heart. He’s holding me so tightly, I’m at risk of suffocation, but it’s exactly what I need.
“Why do you think they took those women?” I ask. “For more testing?”
“It doesn’t matter. Go to sleep, Evelyn.”
Why won’t he tell me? Does he still think I’m going to run to HPAW with the information he shares, or is he just doing this to punish me? It’s frustrating either way.
Caleb’s body heat seeps through my clothing, warming me to the core. It lulls me right to sleep.