Chapter 30
Thirty
Astrid
Thank goodness everything appeared to be fine so far with the baby, and with me, Dr. Patel smiling and reassuring me that all was well. She must have sensed the tension in the room, mistaking it for nervous parents-to-be vibes, which I supposed it was?
But it was also a whole lot more. A ton more. A crazy amount more.
Finding out a baby's on the way, Tristan rushing in here and saying things he had no business saying, figuring out that Aria had betrayed me. How could all this happen all at once?
It was insanity. Absolute insanity.
So I played along, pretending to be part of a happy couple, not wanting to make a scene in front of the woman who would be guiding my baby into the world—oh, my God, my baby.
And when she finally said her goodbyes, Tristan helped me up and out the door, his large hand on the small of my back, something about it protective and possessive at the same time.
I had to admit, it felt incredible, but God, did I even want that?
Yes, I most definitely did. But did I want that with Tristan D. Hawthorne?
This whole thing was exhausting, the visit with the doctor longer than I'd expected with her going over every little detail, from folic acid to fetal development milestones, as if I didn't already feel like I'd been hit by a freight train of epic proportions.
And of course, I had to pee again. Was it already starting, even though this kid was the size of a strawberry? Was this what I had to look forward to?
On the way to the elevator, we passed a bathroom, and I excused myself, Tristan gallantly saying, "Take your time, baby," as I left him there in the hallway.
I would not have a freak-out in the bathroom. I would not. I would save it all for when I got home.
Keeping my mind on that, exactly what I would do when I stepped inside my safe haven, imagining fuzzy socks, no bra, and a huge bowl of peanut butter cup ice cream, I managed to get through my restroom visit without crying or ending up in the fetal position on the floor.
And when I stepped back out into the hallway, I had the surprise of my life, again—my third? fourth of the day?
Tristan stood near the wall, chatting quietly to Aria, Annalise, Ethan, and Max.
Excuse me? What?
Was I currently hallucinating? Was the strawberry inside me making me lose my mind already?
I froze in place, my hands on my thighs where I'd been drying the last remnants of water from them, wondering if I needed glasses or something. Because this could not be real.
Surely Tristan was simply speaking to people who looked like them. Right? Right?
Wrong.
They all turned toward me at once, a myriad of expressions splashed across their faces.
Guilt from my sisters. Guilt from Ethan maybe? Max looking somewhat amused. Tristan smiling softly at me as he swiftly crossed to my side, his hand returning to the place on my lower back he seemed to like.
"Are you okay?" he whispered.
"No. I'm not okay," I answered loudly. "What is going on?"
Aria bit her lip, while Annalise studied her nails, avoiding my death glare, which told me in an instant that they were both in on it. Ethan too. They'd all decided for some godforsaken reason that Tristan should know about this appointment today, even though I'd told them...
Wait, I hadn't exactly told them not to tell him. But it was implied. Of course, it was implied. It was sister code. You didn't tell the baby daddy about the pregnancy unless you had express permission from the soon-to-be mama.
My God. How could they not know that?
"It was her idea," Annalise spoke first, pointing a finger at Aria.
"I'm so sorry," my other traitorous sister said. "I just thought... I just thought..."
At that moment, a door opened behind us, and a couple exited one of the other medical offices on the floor, making me realize we were very much out in public, having a conversation that was intensely private.
Marching forward, I grabbed both of their wrists, then proceeded to haul them down the hallway like a woman possessed, like an angry mom about to scold her misbehaving kids, looking for any room that might do for a smidgeon of privacy.
And near the end, I found it, a supply closet that I kicked open with my foot, still wearing my heels, thank you very much, shoving them inside.
The three men had followed us, warily, I might add, and I crooked my finger at them. "You too," I ordered, waving them inside.
For one mad moment, I thought about locking them all in there and throwing away the key, disgusted with all of them, every last cell in their bodies, annoyed with everything and everybody on this planet right now.
But no, I wanted, I needed, that confrontation, to have it out, to give them all a piece of my mind. Because one thing for sure in this world?
You didn't fuck with a pregnant woman. You just didn't.
So I shoved my way in there after them, the five of them squashed together, all turned toward me, shoulder to shoulder in a tight, little circle.
Flicking on the light switch, I shut the door behind us, giving us some privacy, knowing in my gut that this was ridiculous, that I was acting unhinged, that it would be way more civilized to calmly invite everyone over to my place, order some food, and have a respectful, grown-up discussion with no raised voices or name-calling or hissy fits.
But you know what? Fuck that.
I'd had it. Had it.
I'd officially cracked. No more miss nice girl. No more.
"You," I hissed at my sisters who stood across from me, flanked by their boyfriends, Tristan by my side like he was ready to defend me.
What? Was he really?
I shook my head. Never mind. It didn't matter. Because I was pissed.
"Why?" I spit out. "Why the fuck would you tell him?"
The lack of eye contact told me everything I needed to know. They had no good answer.
"Why?" I repeated in a low growl. "Just tell me already. What was your reasoning? What was your thinking? I need to know. The least you can do is try to explain."
Aria took a deep breath, then finally looked me in the eye.
"We had different reasons. But mine... mine is more because I think you have real feelings for this man, and I—I thought this would force you to.
.. to... I don't know, realize that, to see this man you care for rushing to be by your side for this huge moment, that this is real, that you'd feel it, that—"
"And mine was the opposite," Annalise interrupted. "I thought he'd be a no-show. I never in a million years thought he'd literally run to get here."
I felt Tristan stiffen beside me. "Of course I would. What kind of man do you think I am?"
She rolled her eyes and continued as if he hadn't spoken. "And then, you would have been able to know the truth, that a tiger doesn't change its stripes, that it was time to move on with your life without him."
"No. Absolutely not," Tristan said beside me. "There is nothing on earth that would have stopped me from being here, now and in the future. If Astrid will have me, I'm here to stay."
Whoa, whoa, whoa, too much. Too much.
"See?" Aria turned to Annalise. "He proved you wrong. He is telling the truth about the past, and he does really care about Astrid."
Tristan's eyes bored into the side of my head, drawing my attention. "So I take it you told them everything?" he asked me.
"Of course she did," Max chimed in. "There are no secrets among these three. So be prepared. Anything you say or do will be shared to the entire group in here."
The man had the nerve to smile again. "Okay. Noted."
"Even what happens in the bedroom," Ethan added.
Aria elbowed him. "I don't tell them everything. Like they don't know the size of your—"
Annalise shushed her. "Ew, gross. There are some things we don't need to know."
"Gross?" Ethan repeated. "Really?"
"Yes, gross."
"Guys, enough," I interrupted. God forbid a girl have a proper meltdown with this ridiculous crew. "Back to me and my issues right now. Please. Wait, no please. Forget the please. Fuck saying please. Back to me."
"Right, right, of course," Aria agreed, looking chagrined along with everyone else. "I'm so sorry, Astrid. It was a spur of the moment decision, made in a few seconds, me just going with my gut..."
"Same," Annalise said.
"And I—we—never should have done that without consulting you first."
"Damn right," I scolded. "That was so far out of line, I don't even know what to think of you two right now. I'm disgusted that you would even think of doing something like that."
Aria's eyes filled with moisture. "I know. I know. I was just overcome with this feeling of love, of hope, for you, thinking of all that had happened between you two and thought, well, maybe you could have what I have, a loving relationship, partnership, that fulfills you."
A wave of emotions crashed through me, longing, absolute utter longing, because I wanted that too. God, did I want that.
"I just think you can trust him," she continued. "I believe him. I believe he's telling the truth about the past, and there's nothing I want more for you than to be happy. And he makes you happy. Despite everything, he makes you happier than anyone I've ever seen you with before."
Honestly, that wasn't saying much, because who exactly had she seen me with? No one. That's who.
But... the words she'd spoken still resonated with me. Deeply. Maybe I could indeed trust him.
"I think you can trust him too," Annalise shocked me by saying. "He surprised me by coming here, and I have to say, not many people surprise me in a good way like that."
"Right?" Aria nodded. "Even Annalise thinks you can believe him."
Tristan cleared his throat. "And for what it's worth, I think you should listen to your sisters."
I took a moment to look around the circle, seeing that even Ethan and Max seemed to agree, although I wasn't sure they'd speak up if they didn't, not with my sisters ready to do battle at the moment.
"You know what might help?" Tristan asked.
"What?" came five replies.