Chapter 1
One
Jack gauged the impossible twelve-foot putt.
Jamie Booth, his best friend and business partner, sighed with exasperation. “There’s no way, Jack, so just putt, will you?”
“Stop rushing me.” Jack took a deep calming breath and aligned his putter as a warm spring breeze blew in off Rhode Island’s Narragansett Bay. He tapped the ball, watched in amazement as it dropped into the hole, and pumped his arm like a professional golfer.
While their clients congratulated Jack, Jamie moaned and groaned. “I’ll be hearing about this for weeks.”
“Watch and learn, my friend,” Jack said with a grin. “Watch. And. Learn.”
His cell phone vibrated in his pocket as the foursome moved to the fifteenth tee. Jack checked the caller ID and saw it was his wife, Clare. After the terrible fight they’d had that morning, he was relieved to hear from her.
“Dad?”
The frantic tone of his oldest daughter’s voice stopped his heart. “What’s the matter?”
“It’s Mom.”
“What? What, Jill?”
“She was hit by a car.” Jill was crying so hard, he had trouble understanding her. “They’re taking her to Newport Hospital.”
Her words sent a jolt of icy fear straight through him. “I’m coming, honey,” he managed to say. “I’ll be right there.”
Abandoning his clubs and his clients, he took off running across the golf course.
In the parking lot, Jamie pried Jack’s keys out of his hand. “What’s wrong, Jack?”
“It’s Clare.” Jack told him the news in a flat, shocked tone as they peeled out of the parking lot.
“Oh my God,” Jamie muttered.
During the brief ride, a series of images flashed through Jack’s mind, spanning the nearly twenty years he’d spent with Clare. His stomach ached when he remembered their angry words that morning. She has to be all right. She has to be.
“Talk to me,” Jamie said.
“We fought.” Jack felt detached from the moment, as if he was watching a movie of someone else’s life.
“When?”
“This morning.”
“I didn’t think you guys ever fought.”
“We never used to, but lately…Seems to be all we do.” Jack hadn’t even realized it until that moment, until it was possible he could lose her.
“What happened this morning?”
“She…pushed me away. In bed. Again. I can’t remember the last time she didn’t push me away. It’s been months.”
“You never said anything was wrong.”
“I was afraid to say it out loud until I heard she might be hurt.” He ached with worry and fear over what he’d find at the hospital.
“Or worse.” Forcing himself to breathe, he said, “God, what if she’s dead?
What if the last thing I said to her was ‘if you want out of this marriage, just let me know?’”
“You’ll work it out. You two are solid, man. Whatever’s wrong, you’ll get through it.”
Provided she isn’t dead, Jack thought. Please don’t let her be dead.
They pulled up to the emergency entrance, and Jack leaped from the car. Inside he found his daughters in the care of a nurse and a police officer. Jill, Kate, and Maggie were crying as they flew into Jack’s arms.
Jack held them for a long time, his heart racing as their gut-wrenching sobs ramped up his already out-of-control anxiety. “Can you tell me what happened?”
Jamie put an arm around Maggie and led her away so her older sisters could talk to their father.
“We were leaving the mall,” Jill said, swiping at tears. “And this car came right at us. We jumped out of the way, but she just stood there, and the car hit her.” A sob hiccupped through her. “She went right over the top and landed on the pavement.”
“Okay, honey,” he said, comforting his daughter while he tried to process what she’d said. As he imagined the scene, his chest tightened. “Maybe she just couldn’t get out of the way in time.”
Kate shook her head. “She didn’t move. It was like she wanted the car to hit her or something.”
“I’m sure it was so scary, but you must’ve seen it wrong,” Jack insisted. “Mom would never do that.”
A young doctor came through swinging doors to the waiting room. “Mr. Harrington? I’m Dr. Rooney.” He led Jack away from the girls.
Jamie left Maggie in the care of her sisters and walked over to hear what the doctor had to say.
“Your wife is in extremely critical condition with a significant head injury,” Dr. Rooney said. “She also has multiple fractures and a lacerated liver. When we get her stabilized, we’ll be taking her up to surgery to remove her spleen and repair her liver.”
Shocked, Jack said, “But she’ll be all right, won’t she?”
“The head injury is a big concern. We’re inducing a coma to allow the swelling in her brain to subside. The next twenty-four to forty-eight hours will be critical.”
Jack’s hands were trembling, so he jammed them into his pockets. “How long will you keep her in the coma?”
“Hopefully, only a few days,” Dr. Rooney said. “We’ll have to wait and see what happens when we take her off the sedation.”
“What could happen?” Jack had never experienced such raw fear. “She’ll wake up then, right?”
“I can’t say for certain. The head injury is severe. I wish I could tell you more, but it’s a wait-and-see thing at this point. I’m sorry.”
“I want to be with her.”
“I’ll come and find you when we get her settled after surgery,” the doctor said as he walked away.
“A coma,” Jack said, incredulous.
Jamie squeezed Jack’s shoulder. “Why don’t you call your mother and ask her to come help with the girls?”
“I just can’t believe this. She’s never been sick a day in her life. Remember how she was after having the girls?”
“I remember. She’s superwoman, so there’s nothing to worry about. I’m sure she’ll be asking for you in no time.”
“Yeah,” Jack said. “Definitely.”
The surgeons removed Clare’s spleen, mended her liver, and set her badly broken arm and leg.
After a week, her doctors were relieved that she was able to breathe on her own when they took her off the respirator.
Encouraged, they also weaned her from the sedation.
Jack, the girls, his sister, Clare’s mother, brother, and sister kept up a round-the-clock vigil by her bedside.
They sang to her, played her favorite music, cried, begged, and pleaded until they were hoarse, but she didn’t regain consciousness.
At the end of the third week, Dr. Blake, the neurologist, asked to speak with Jack. Worried about what he might hear, Jack asked his sister, Frannie, to come, too.
“I’m afraid there’s nothing more we can do for your wife. The blow to her head was tremendous, and we believe her coma is irreversible.”
Jack and Frannie gasped as the doctor snatched away their last shred of hope.
“So what does that mean?” Jack asked. “What’re you saying?”
“You have choices. Difficult choices.”
“Such as?”
“Since she has no advanced directive, you can make decisions for her as her next of kin.”
“Are you suggesting I end her life?”
“It’s an option you may need to consider at some point down the road.”
“I want to hear the others, because that’s not on the table.”
“Mr. Harrington, she’s forty-three years old. She could live in this condition for decades.”
Jack held up his hand to stop the doctor. “Is she brain dead?”
“Not technically—”
“Then I don’t want to hear another word about ending her life. As long as there’s activity in her brain I want her treated as if she’s going to recover.”
“We don’t believe she will.”
“As long as there’s any chance at all—”
“There’s less than a one percent chance.”
“That’s not zero,” Jack said with a look that all but dared the doctor to argue with him.
The doctor seemed to realize the conversation was pointless. “We’ll discharge her in a few days. I suggest you investigate long-term care for her. I can get you the names of some places, if that would help.”
Left alone with his sister, Jack tried to absorb what the doctor had told him.
“I’ll move here, Jack,” Frannie said decisively. She lived in New York, where she worked as an artist, and had recently ended a brief second marriage. “I’ll help with the girls and whatever else you need.”
“I can’t ask you to do that.”
“You didn’t ask. I want to.” She gripped his hand as her hazel eyes heated with emotion. “What’s more important than making sure the girls are well cared for right now?”
“Nothing,” Jack said, resigned to the fact that he needed what his sister was offering. Besides, he was too drained to argue with her. “Thanks, Fran.”
When Frannie left to pick up Maggie at a friend’s house, Jack went back to Clare’s room, where he’d spent most of the last three weeks.
Despite the feeding tube, yellowing bruises, and casts on her arm and leg, she looked so much like herself that he ached with yearning to have her back, to have her turn those brilliant blue eyes his way and flash that special smile she used to save just for him, back when things were right between them.
Taking her hand, he held it against his face, and smoothed the blonde hair off her forehead with his other hand.
“I know you can hear me,” he said softly.
“The things I said that day…I didn’t mean them.
You know I didn’t. Whatever’s bothering you, we can fix it.
I need you to come back to me. Please, Clare. Don’t give up.”
How could this have happened to her? To them?
If the girls were to be believed, she’d let the car hit her.
But why? The questions tortured him through sleepless nights and agonizing days.
Since her accident, he’d run through every minute he could remember from the last few months.
Something had definitely been off between them.
In place of her usually sunny, upbeat disposition, she’d been prone to long silences and bad dreams she thought he didn’t know about.
But every time he’d tried to broach the subject with her, he’d been rebuffed.
Their usually passionate and satisfying sex life had all but disappeared. Was it possible she’d met someone else? Had she decided to end a marriage that ranked as one of the proudest accomplishments in his life? Had she been waiting for the right time to tell him?