Chapter 25 #2
“No, I wouldn’t. Our friendship ended when she refused to let me help Neisy or tell anyone what we’d seen. I own the fact that I could’ve done it anyway, but she was very convincing about what was at stake for both of us.”
“Peer pressure can be a very powerful thing.”
“For sure. When you’re a teenager, the only thing that matters to you is what your friends think of you. I cringe now at how concerned I was then by what people I didn’t even care about would say about me if I reported what I’d seen. I couldn’t tell you where most of those people are now.”
He twirls a length of my hair around his finger. “Were you in with the in crowd?”
“God, no,” I say with a laugh. “Not at all. Sienna was on the fringe because she was with Cam, and my brother was, but I was in the background, basically overlooked by the popular kids. That never really bothered me until Sienna said they’d all hate me if I turned on Ryder.”
“I can’t imagine you being overlooked.”
“Well, I was. No one gave two thoughts to me, which was fine. I didn’t like being the center of attention, even on my birthday. It made me uncomfortable.”
“And yet you went to acting school?”
“I know, right? It was the ability to disappear into a character, to leave my own story behind for a while, that appealed to me.”
“I can see how that would’ve given you solace. I hope it’s okay that you now have my full and undivided attention.”
“You’re just trying to make me blush.”
He runs a fingertip over my cheek. “I hate to tell you it’s working.”
“Ugh, I hate that more than anything.”
“You can’t hate my favorite thing.”
“Yes, I can.”
“Nope.”
He kisses me, making me forget why I was “arguing” with him in the first place.
The more time I spend with him, the further I seem to get from the life I was leading before him.
All I want is to be wherever he is, which is something we should probably talk about at some point.
But for now, I’m too drunk on his kisses to think about anything other than what’s happening right now.
The T-shirt I slept in moves up and over my head, baring me to his heated gaze.
“You’re beautiful everywhere. I can’t imagine anyone overlooking you.”
He sets me on fire with his words and soft caresses.
But more than that, he makes me feel everything in a way I never have before.
Maybe because I was never free to enjoy something like this the way I am now.
His lips are everywhere as he seduces me one kiss at a time.
When I reach for him, he stops me. “Just relax and let me love you.”
Relaxing is easier said than done when he moves down between my legs and uses his tongue and fingers to bring me to an orgasm that has me moaning and thrashing from the power of it. That’s never happened with a partner before, and it’s way better than the solo version.
“Do we need birth control?”
“I’m protected and safe if you are.” This isn’t the time to tell him my periods had been erratic and painful until I went on birth control to regulate them.
“I’m very safe in all the ways that matter.”
“And you know just what to say to me.”
Propped above me, he uses his fingertips to brush the hair back from my face. “I want you to be comfortable with me. Always.”
“I’m a little uncomfortable right now,” I tell him with a flirty smile and a seductive wiggle of my hips that I wouldn’t have been capable of a few weeks ago.
It’s amazing how my unburdening has changed me so profoundly and made me see what I’ve been missing for all the years I carried that terrible weight.
“I bet I know just how to fix that.” He pushes into me and makes me gasp from the intense pressure, the tight fit and the emotional overload that comes from doing this with someone I truly care for. “Is this okay?”
“Mmm, yes. Very okay.”
Because he’s got me so aroused and relaxed at the same time, because my conscience is clear and my life is full of new possibilities, I enjoy this more than I ever have before. I’m able to fully let go with him.
“I knew it would be amazing with you,” he says after we’ve made Fenway bark from the noise we’re making.
“Did you?”
“Oh yeah.”
“Thank you for being patient with me.”
“Blaise…” His eyes close as his head falls back. “Tell me you’re close.”
“I am.”
He picks up the pace and takes us both to a finish line that has us gasping and clinging to each other. It’s a moment of complete unity that fills me with brand new emotions.
“We need to do that again,” he mutters from his perch on top of me. “And again and again and again.”
“You didn’t tell me you were a fiend that way.”
“I never have been before, but I have a feeling I could be with you.”
“Oh, lucky me,” I say with a laugh.
He raises his head to kiss me. “No, lucky me.” As he gazes down at me with his heart in his eyes, I feel things I’d all but given up on before him. “This is good between us. Tell me you feel it, too.”
“I do.”
“What’re we going to do about that?”
“I’m not sure yet, but I need to go deal with work before Wendall has a meltdown.”
“I don’t want to let you go.”
“Even if I promise to come right back?”
“Well, I suppose if you’re willing to promise.”
Smiling, I draw him into a kiss that makes him groan.
“Don’t kiss me like that and then tell me you have to go.”
“I’ll be right back. Promise.”
“Fine,” he says with an adorable pout as he withdraws from me and rolls onto his back.
Fenway lifts her head off her dog bed to see what we’re doing. I hope she isn’t scarred for life by what went on in that bed.
Still feeling shy, even after what we just did, I wrap a throw blanket around myself to go into the bathroom to clean up and get dressed.
“Back in a few,” I tell him before I go downstairs and out the back door with Fenway hot on my heels.
As we emerge from the house, Fenway barks at a woman leaning against her car.
“Fenway, stop!” I run a hand through my hair, wondering if I look like I’ve recently been ravished. “May I help you?”
Fenway runs off to pee.
“You probably don’t remember me. I’m Mary Elliott.”
Oh shit. Ryder’s mother. “I, um, I remember you.” Even if I didn’t immediately recognize her, I do now that she’s filled in the blanks for me.
Her hair has gone gray, and her face is more lined than it was the last time I saw her.
She was one of those people who was at every game and event at the school.
She blended into the fabric of our town. “What can I do for you?”
“I think you know why I’m here.”
“I can’t help you with that.”
“Can’t you?”
“No, I can’t.”
“You could tell them you’re not going to testify after all.”
“I’m not willing to do that.”
“Why would you come forward after all this time?”
“Because I should’ve done it then but wasn’t strong enough to deal with peer pressure and the fear of everyone hating me. I don’t care about that anymore.”
“Ryder is a good man,” she says tearfully. “He’s a loving husband and father to three sweet kids who adore him. His life went off the rails when it became clear he was going to lose Louisa. I don’t say that to make excuses for him.”
“There’s no excuse in the world for what he did that night.”
“Maybe you saw it wrong.”
“I didn’t see it wrong, Mrs. Elliott. I saw him rape her, and I’m going to testify to that. I’m sorry if that hurts you and your family, but it’s the truth. You should take it up with him.”
“You think I haven’t?”
The vehemence in her tone puts me on edge. Do I need to be afraid of her?
“That’s enough,” Jack says from behind me as Fenway runs over to him, greeting him as if she hasn’t seen him in days. “You need to be going, ma’am.”
She stares daggers at me. “I really hope you’ll think twice about what you’re doing.”
“Are you threatening me?”
“Not at all. I’m asking you to consider how your actions affect others.”
That statement is so preposterous coming from her that it’s all I can do not to laugh in her face. “My actions aren’t what caused this.”
“You should’ve stayed gone. Nobody missed you.”
“Get off my property,” Jack says. “Now.”
She gives me a hateful look and then gets in her car, blowing up dust as she stomps on the gas to back out of the driveway.