Chapter 17
CHAPTER 17
KARIMA
W hen we walked into Baptist Hospital, my hands were trembling. I had my instructions from the Lord, but I was so nervous about it. Talking in front of the entire family during this time would prove to be the most difficult thing I’d ever done. I thought the most difficult was telling them I was moving to Nashville. That had nothing on this.
Rhodes grabbed my hand and kissed it. Our ride here had been somewhat quiet. I believed he was trying to wrap his mind around what he thought was about to happen. After going to the second floor, I saw my family all over the place. There was no way we would ever fit into a consultation room. There was way too many of us for that sort of thing. Everyone was here, so they had probably already been told that he didn’t have much longer.
While no one from the family had told me, God had already prepared me. When my daddy saw me, he stood and came to me. “Come on, baby.”
I grabbed his hand and released Rhodes. Glancing back at him, he gave me a tight smile. After walking through the ICU doors, my dad put his arm around me. “It’s not looking good, baby. I don’t think he has much longer. I didn’t want to tell you that by phone.”
I stopped and stared at his red face. Gently caressing his cheek, I said, “I know, Daddy.”
He nodded, then we continued to Grandpa’s room. I walked inside as Daddy remained in the hallway, to see Aunt Tiff and Aunt Jenahra seated on each side of him. Uncle Storm was next to Aunt Jen and Uncle Jasper was next to Aunt Tiff. Uncle WJ and Aunt Chrissy were at the foot of the bed, and Uncle Marcus was in a corner of the room. I could see and feel the despair. Grandpa was really laboring, even with the assistance from the machine.
Aunt Jen and Uncle Storm stepped aside to let me get close to him. Glancing back, I saw my daddy walk inside and close the door. I looked around the room at everyone. Seeing their tears only caused mine to fall. When I looked at Grandpa, he was looking directly at me. I grabbed his hand to feel a slight tremble in it. He was scared. I leaned over and kissed his forehead then closed my eyes.
“God is with you, Grandpa.”
He squeezed my hand for a moment then released it and brought it to my pregnant belly. He stopped laboring so much, like he was having a moment of peace before it was time. I laid my hand on his chest. In my spirit, I said, “Comfort him and give him peace. Let it be well with his soul.”
I opened my eyes, and he gave me a slight smile right before the machine went crazy. Aunt Tiff started screaming and practically pushed me out of the way before Uncle Jasper wrapped his arms around her. The nurses pushed us all out to the hallway. Somehow, they all huddled, and I ended up in the middle of them.
“He taught us what it meant to be Hendersons. His work here was done. He had a full, healthy life that we all got to enjoy. God blessed him, and he used those blessings to bless us. Despite all the wrong he did, he was able to make all of it right before leaving us. I know this is hard, but Grandpa is at peace. He’s with Grandma now. I can hear them arguing now about how to pronounce data.”
My last line produced a slight smile from Uncle Jasper. I continued as Aunt Tiff buried her face in Uncle Storm’s chest. “His spirit is at ease. He’s been in turmoil ever since Grandma left us a few years ago. He’s been longing for this moment. We have to be grateful for the time we had with him. While it hurts, we can’t grieve as if there is no hope. God is able to hold us all and give us all peace.”
Uncle WJ leaned over and hugged me tightly. “God has given you wisdom beyond your years, niece. Thank you. Just from your words, my soul is at peace.”
If Uncle WJ was at peace, then I knew God was a miracle worker. He didn’t have as many years with a loving father as his siblings had, but God had given him peace through my words to them. They all hugged me one at a time and when I got to Uncle Storm, he said, “I love you, niece. You have to be the first female angel. Don’t tell Tiff. She gon’ get jealous.”
I smiled softly at him as the doctor came out and offered his condolences. Grandpa was gone, and although tears were still falling, we were all at peace. After giving directives to the hospital staff, we all walked out to the waiting area. When the rest of the family saw us all walking out of the ICU, they erupted. Screams and cries flooded the area. I could even see anger. I closed my eyes for a moment. Before I could open them, I felt hands at my waist, picking me up.
I turned to see Uncle Storm lifting me and standing me on a table. My family looked overcome by sadness, and it was extremely loud in the area because there was so many of us. God directed me to just lift my hands. Within a couple of minutes, everyone had gathered around me, and the noise level had come down completely. They were all looking to me for what I would say. I noticed Christian and Jacob toward the back, seemingly overcome with guilt. I could feel it.
“God doesn’t make mistakes. He is in full control, even when it looks like He’s not. We don’t know why He allowed Grandpa to go this way, and we may never know. What we do know is that Grandpa lived a full life. He made sure his family was set for life. It was on his back that we have become who we are. He worked hard and now he’s gone from labor to reward.”
I could see head nods. I glanced at my brothers as they stared at me. Kingsley gave me a tight smile. “Sometimes, when it takes us a long time to get this life thing right, God can choose to take us before we have time to mess up again. Grandpa had made all his wrongs right. He was missing Grandma, and he was ready to be reunited with the love of his life. I know this is hard, but we have all the memories to keep us going. We will become even closer to get through this.”
I closed my eyes as I said, “He loved all of us. Don’t allow his death to separate us. I love y’all, and I love the way we always look out for one another. Let’s not lose that.”
I turned to see Rhodes was now standing next to me. He helped me down and kissed my head. I placed my hand on his cheek then made my way to Christian and Jacob. I knew they were feeling like their interaction with those people led to all of this, but none of this was their faults. This was a random robbery gone bad.
When I got to them after numerous hugs, Jacob lowered his head. “No. Pick your head up,” I said as Mekayla made her way to him.
She circled her arms around his waist and LaTee did the same. “You see all this love you have? This isn’t on you. Don’t allow this to drag you back to that place mentally. What happened had nothing to do with any of that foolishness. Okay? Grandpa was extremely proud of you… of all of us. His job here was done.”
When Mekayla and LaTee released him, he immediately wrapped his arms around me. I stared at Christian while I hugged Jacob and said, “That goes for you too.”
Jacob released me, and I hugged Christian. When I pulled away from them, I felt extremely drained. I hoped I did what God wanted me to do. Making my way to a chair, I sat.
“Baby, you okay?” Rhodes asked as he sat next to me.
“I just feel weak and exhausted.”
“You haven’t eaten. Let me get you some potato chips or something. When we leave, I have something to tell you.” I nodded as he caressed my cheek. “I wish you could have seen what I did while you were speaking. I’m so sorry for your loss, KD.”
He kissed my lips then went downstairs as we waited for the funeral home to come and get Grandpa’s body. While I knew Uncle WJ had a lot to do with where Henderson Ranch and Farms was today, it was Grandpa’s vision. He established this company when Uncle WJ was a baby. He created wealth that would last for generations to come. He’d accomplished what God put him here for, and I was grateful that he received his flowers while he was living.
* * *
As Rhodes rubbed my feet, I lay against Kingsley, letting him offer me comfort. We were at my grandparents’ home. My dad, aunts, and uncles were in the kitchen talking. I was sure they were making funeral arrangements. This wasn’t something I was expecting to be doing today. I thought I would be laying in my man’s arms after my nap, enjoying our quiet time together. Grandpa’s attack was unfortunate, but Ace had sought retribution immediately.
Mr. Berotte and Mrs. Taylor would be here in the morning to discuss what would happen to him. He’d killed three people, and I just couldn’t see him walking away from that. Uncle Marcus and Aunt Syn had been extremely quiet, and Malia had been crying quite a bit. They’d remanded Ace the other day. That had killed Aunt Syn. While he wasn’t biologically hers, she’d cried like she’d raised him from birth.
Uncle Marcus had to console her as well as Heaven, Ace’s biological mother. She came around the family from time to time and had a sweet spirit. Everyone liked her, even Uncle Storm. Now that Grandpa had died from injuries sustained from the attack, I was pretty sure they would be going before the judge again to appeal. Ace had let his anger lead the way. His crew of cousins were suffering emotionally about it, which included my two younger brothers.
I glanced up at Kingsley to find him staring at his phone. “You okay, King?”
“Yeah. Just catching up on the group texts from SS, Royal, Ryder J, Crew, and Kane. What happened to our dawg is fucked up. That could have been any of us. We all would have killed to protect Grandpa. I don’t care if it was ten niggas. I would have killed every last one of ’em. In a situation like that, there’s no such thing as shooting to injure. Muthafuckas still could have retaliated and shot him. They said one of them had a gun on him. I can’t believe they remanded him… like he a fucking flight risk or something. He don’t even have a record. It’s bullshit.”
I removed my feet from Rhodes hands and turned to my brother. He was hurting so much. I was almost sure they all were. Our family was hit with a double whammy. Grandpa was gone, and if the judge didn’t see things the way we did, we could lose Ace to the penal system. He would be the first in the family to do serious time. This shit wasn’t right. He was defending our grandfather. All three of those boys had attacked him… and killed him.
I allowed a couple of tears to fall from my eyes. It was so messed up. I pulled Kingsley in my arms and hugged him tightly. “Hopefully the police will do something about the crime in our area. We don’t bother nobody, but these niggas won’t stop messing with us. I feel like Grandpa was targeted.” I released him and asked, “They said one of the boys was related to the Andersons, right?”
“I think so. Mister Berotte will probably enlighten us in the morning. It’s just not right. Ace is only twenty-six. He still has his entire life ahead of him. He just got a girlfriend and everything. He was trying to finally be with one woman. I don’t even know if she’s gonna stick around after this. I don’t even know if she knows him well enough to trust that he ain’t a thug.”
“I’m going to be praying hard. There is no way Ace can go down for this. We will prevail. You believe that?”
“I’m trying to, sis. It’s hard though. Let me go outside and check on my boys.”
“Okay. I love you.”
“I love you too, sis.”
He kissed my forehead and stood from the couch and headed outside. I snuggled against Rhodes, and he embraced me and kissed my head. It seemed life was mad as hell at the Hendersons, and I couldn’t understand why. Those people hated us so much. Pray for them. I frowned so hard until my head started throbbing. I couldn’t have heard the Lord right, because naw, nigga, naw. Pray for your enemies. I huffed loud enough for Rhodes to hear me then stood and went upstairs to my grandparents’ bedroom.
I’d slept in this bedroom a many days for naps when I was little. The bed seemed like it was high as the sky back then. I took off my shoes and got in. “God, soften my heart, because what you’ve required of me seems practically impossible. I don’t want to pray for those people. I literally felt nothing about the boys Ace killed. Forgive me. I’m not operating in Your love. Use me to bring peace to our family and theirs. Help them to live in their truths, and take the hate from their hearts.”
I huffed again as Roselynn kicked. “Take the hate away from our hearts concerning them as well. You said for us to love our enemies and pray for those who persecute us that we may be sons of Yours. I’m being obedient, God. I ask that You would bless them with knowledge and wisdom. Bless them with Your love. Help them to operate in love. We are in desperate need of a cease fire. Too much blood has been shed. We all need You. Thank You for loving us. Keep my cousin in Your care. He needs You too. I love and praise You for what I know You’re going to do. In Your son’s name. Amen.”
When I opened my eyes and lay flat on my back, I saw my brother, KJ, standing there. “You okay, Rima?”
“Yeah. Just came up here to pray.”
“Yeah. I heard you praying for those people.”
I chuckled. “I was just being obedient to God.”
“Mm-hmm. You better than me, ’cause fuck them people. I have not an ounce of love in my heart for them.”
“You nor anyone else, but that was what I was praying for. You don’t have to be in their face, but the hatred you’re harboring towards them will affect you more than them.”
He nodded then gently rubbed my stomach. “How are you handling the pregnancy?”
“I’m handling it well. Rhodes has really been good to me. I really wish y’all could be cool, but I know that will take time. Y’all are so protective of me. Daddy was at the house earlier and didn’t say a word about Grandpa. I knew that was to protect me until he knew more. But… I’m grown now. I need y’all to understand that I will be okay and that I can handle whatever comes my way.”
He took a deep breath as I sat up. “You right. I’m gon’ try. I was willing to try before, but it seems I was knocked backwards concerning him with y’all being shot at.”
He helped me to my feet so I could go back downstairs. Before I could walk away, he hugged me. I smiled and wrapped my arms around his waist. Although I was close to Kingsley, Kendrall was the second man I loved. He took care of me, even though he was still a kid himself. Daddy taught him to always look out for me. I kissed his cheek and said, “I love you, Kendrall.”
“I love you too, baby girl.”
We walked back downstairs to see everyone eating. I wasn’t sure what Aunt Jen and Aunt Chrissy had cooked up in there, but it smelled good. My eyes immediately landed on Rhodes’s. He had a plate of food for me sitting on a TV tray next to him. He stood and came to me.
“Are you okay, baby? I didn’t want to follow you up there and have anyone thinking I was just walking all over your grandparents’ home.”
“I’m okay. I needed to pray. What did they cook?”
He smiled and kissed my head. Before he could respond, Kendrall had extended his hand to him. I smiled at the gesture. Rhodes shook his hand and nodded. No words were exchanged, but I knew that was my brother’s way of trying to honor my wishes.
“They fried fish and French fries and boiled corn on the cob. I know you’re hungry. That bag of chips you ate probably been gone.”
“Hell yeah. I’m starving, and Roselynn is definitely letting me know.”
He chuckled and gently rubbed my belly. “Daddy finna set her straight, princess.”
I rolled my eyes slightly, and a tear slid down my cheek. I quickly wiped it. No matter how much I was trying to pretend to be strong, the hurt of losing my grandfather ran deep. I didn’t want anyone to doubt my words by seeing me break. Just because I could hear from God didn’t mean I didn’t feel sorrow at times. I knew they would misconstrue it though. So I typically kept my emotions to myself until I was alone.
I glanced up at Rhodes, and I knew he saw and understood me. “I got’chu when we get home, baby.”
I took a deep breath and gave him a tight smile. Sitting next to him, I blessed our food then inhaled it, using it as a distraction from everything around me. Its secondary thing was to nourish my body. With everyone around me feeling sorrowful, I needed to disappear for a moment to get my spirit right. As soon as I was done eating, that was exactly what I would do.