Chapter 4 #2
Angus was basically my brother. We’d been friends at school, and he’d had a really shitty home situation.
It had culminated in him ending up homeless at sixteen, and my parents had taken him in.
They probably would’ve adopted him, too, if his biological parents hadn’t been so impossible to track down, so the legal side could never be dealt with.
In the end, it didn’t really matter. Angus was part of the family, and he pretty much saw my parents as his own.
The only downside was that he and Shannon never really clicked.
I suspected it was down to the fact that they’d both found sanctuary away from their home lives in my family, and they each felt like there wasn’t room for both of them, which wasn’t true at all.
I knew that my mother had always wanted more kids, but her pregnancy with Fran had been fraught with issues, so she hadn’t been able to take the chance with a third baby.
“Jace, over here!” Angus called out, and I headed in his direction, still scanning the space for Shannon, but she hadn’t seemed to have arrived yet.
“Have you seen this?” Kami asked, motioning to the painting nearest them. “I think it’s supposed to be us.”
The painting showed the silhouette of a band on stage. The colours he’d used to contrast our dark figures with the stage lights was attention grabbing. “I think you’re right.”
“Pretty cool, isn’t it?” Elias put in, ever the proud older brother. I nodded, and he levelled me with a scrutinising look. “How’s it been being home? I heard you’re staying with your parents for a while.”
“Yeah, just until I can figure out where I want to settle.”
“Are you looking at houses?” Kami asked excitedly. “Can I help?”
“Not yet, but it’s on the horizon. Still finding my feet.”
“So,” Elias said, eyeing me. “You and Shannon are talking again?”
“Tentatively, yes. It’s been okay so far. It’ll take a while for her to trust me, I think, but hopefully, we’ll get there. She’s actually coming tonight.”
Angus’ eyebrows shot up, while he and Kami shared a look.
Notwithstanding Angus and Shannon’s rivalry when we were younger, now there was an added layer of hostility after our divorce.
Kami and Angus both thought Shannon should’ve stayed with me and helped me through my addiction, but I completely disagreed.
Shannon had tried, but no one could help me back then.
I was lost, and her staying would’ve only prolonged her suffering.
“You two better be polite to her when she gets here. She doesn’t deserve your attitude.”
“Don’t worry. We’ll be nice as pie to the ice queen,” Kami chirped, and I scowled.
“She’s not an ice queen.”
“He’s right,” Elias backed me up. “Shannon’s the sweetest, but she only opens up to people she trusts.”
“I’ve never seen someone defend their ex as much as you,” Angus said, rubbing at his eyebrow. “She divorced you when you were at your lowest and needed her most.”
“She divorced me because I was an addict who ruined our marriage,” I corrected him and raked a hand through my hair. “We’re not discussing this. Just be polite to her; it’s all I ask.”
With that, I stalked away, heading in the direction of my parents when I noticed Shannon arriving.
My breath caught at the sight of her, her hair a little windswept from being outside, her black dress perfectly pressed and paired with matching black heels.
She busied herself fixing her hair, peering at her reflection in the glass of the entryway as I approached.
“You look perfect, quit fussing,” I spoke low, and she turned, taken off guard.
“Jace! I didn’t see you.”
I smiled. “I know. Glad you came.”
“Yes, well, Margie was able to watch Zara, so it all worked out.”
“I could’ve stayed home with her. Roan could care less about me being here, but for some reason, he really wanted you to see his paintings.”
“He did?” she frowned to herself like it didn’t make sense before her eyes rounded. “Oh no, please tell me he didn’t.”
“Didn’t what?”
Shannon met my gaze, her cheeks flushing. “About two years ago, I sat for a portrait for Roan. At the time, he said he just wanted to practice, but now I’m worried he might’ve finished the piece and included it in the exhibition.”
I smiled gently at her fluster. “What’s so bad about that? Roan’s an amazing artist. Whatever he painted, I’m sure it turned out great.”
“I don’t want the attention,” Shannon replied stiffly, her eyes darting to the exit.
Swiftly, I wound my arm around her waist and guided her farther into the building. “Oh, no, you don’t. You’re staying. My cousin will be heartbroken if you leave.”
Shannon made a noise that signalled her disagreement just as the man himself appeared in front of us.
Roan wore a grey T-shirt and black jeans, the blond hair he inherited from his mother almost reaching his shoulders.
When we were teenagers, we used to tease him about looking like an Anne Rice vampire, and he’d always get extremely embarrassed and threaten to cut his hair in retaliation, though he never did. He was far too proud of it.
“You came,” he said, his focus all on Shannon as he stepped forward and pulled her into a tight hug. “I’m so happy to see you.”
You see? I mouthed at her while Roan’s back was turned, but she only shook her head like I was being ridiculous.
Envy took hold because I wished I could hug Shannon like my cousin was hugging her.
They had a warm familiarity, and it killed me to no longer have her affection like Roan did.
They broke apart, and he smiled at her, then glanced at me.
“Hey, Jace.”
I smirked. “Finally noticed I was standing here, eh?”
My question flustered him a little, and I felt a bit bad about it because Roan was a shy sort of bloke. “Sorry, I just …” He glanced back at Shannon. “I have something I want to show Shannon, and I’ve been pretty eager about it.”
“Oh, Roan, please don’t tell me it’s a painting of—”
“Just come see before you say anything.” With that, he took hold of her hand and led her to the other end of the gallery. I followed behind them, once again green with envy that he could so casually hold her hand. That used to be me.
Roan stopped in front of one of the smaller pieces, and my breath caught as soon as I saw the painting.
I’m buying this one. No one else gets to have this.
It was an up close portrait of Shannon, her hair pulled over one shoulder, the background empty, making her the focal point.
There was something about the image that held the viewer captive.
Shannon always tried to fade into the background wearing dark, monochromatic clothes, but her clothing told a lie because on the inside she was every colour of the rainbow, just like my cousin had captured.
“My goodness, Roan,” Shannon exclaimed, her expression half flattered, half self-conscious. “I don’t know what to say.”
“It’s beautiful,” I murmured, standing next to her.
Her cheeks reddened as her gaze flicked my way, then returned to Roan. “Thank you.”
“It’s how I see you,” he said, then rather self-consciously he asked, “Do you like it?”
Shannon gave a soft chuckle. “I would rather you’d warned me I was going to be a subject of one the paintings you were showing, but yes, I do like it. No one’s ever …” she trailed off, her gaze once again catching on mine. My parents appeared then, saving her from finishing the sentence.
No one’s ever what? Captured her in a work of art?
Well, I knew that was bullshit because I’d written countless songs about her.
I had a feeling she hadn’t heard any of the newer ones because Zara had mentioned something about her mam never listening to my music anymore.
Our biggest hit in recent years was Her Heartbeat.
Every single word in that song was about Shannon, and she likely hadn’t heard it, not even once.
It cut me to the quick, but I’d come to understand her reasoning and even taken hope from it.
If my songs made her feel an emotion strong enough to avoid listening to them, then that meant our connection was still alive in some way. If she’d completely moved on, the music wouldn’t bother her anymore, surely?
My parents proceeded to greet Shannon before telling Roan what an amazing collection of work he’d put together.
I left the group momentarily to find the gallery manager who was standing by a table in the back.
I quickly slid my card to her, paying for the painting of Shannon and then returning to the group without anyone having noticed my absence.
My gaze found Shannon as she quietly joined in the discussion on Roan’s paintings when suddenly a gentle hand touched my elbow.
“I can’t believe you’re okay,” a voice gushed, and I turned to find a young woman with red, shoulder length hair gazing up at me. She looked about my age, but I’d never seen her before in my life.
Her blue eyes watered with tears, and a bad feeling took hold as I replied, “I’m sorry, what?”
“The car accident in Japan. I know your management wanted to keep it quiet from the press. Honestly, after how you described it, I thought you were going to be in much worse shape, but you look great.”
Her reference to an accident had a sick feeling taking over because I’d been in that wreck with Cai all those years ago, and it haunted me to this day. But there’d been no accident in Japan. “Car accident? I don’t—”
“Jace, it’s me, Alison.” She motioned to herself like the very notion of me not recognising her was preposterous. “I know you wanted to wait a little longer to meet in person, but I was so worried I just had to come find you, make sure you were all right.”
What in the ever loving hell was going on here? “My apologies, Alison, was it? But I have no idea who you are.”
Several emotions passed over her face in rapid succession: confusion, disbelief, more confusion.
Then anger took hold. “We’ve been talking online for over a year.
You said you were in love with me. I can’t …
I can’t believe this. I took the bus all the way from Waterford to come here tonight.
I even booked a hotel room I can barely afford, and now you’re pretending not to know me? ”
Her outburst garnered the attention of those standing close by, and I was momentarily clueless as to how to deal with this. My eyes caught on Shannon, who was looking between me and the redhead in concern. Then my dad appeared, and I couldn’t have been more relieved.
“Hello, darlin’, is everything okay? Can we help you with something?”
His voice seemed to break through the angry tears she was shedding as she turned her attention to him. “Y-you’re Jay Fields.”
“That’s right, and you seem to be upset with my son.”
“He’s pretending not to know me.”
“That’s because I don’t know you,” I said firmly, making sure everyone heard.
My band often attracted intense fans, but something about her mention of us talking online for over a year had an even sicker feeling filling my gut.
I’d known of other musicians having people impersonate them on the internet, but up until now, I’d been lucky enough not to have it happen to me.
“How can you say that?” Alison shot back, visibly distraught.
My dad glanced at Roan. “Is there a back room where we can take her to sit down and talk?”
My cousin bobbed his head, looking worriedly at Alison like she might be some deranged stalker.
But this woman didn’t seem dangerous, just very upset.
My dad placed his hand on her elbow and began leading her away, my mother following suit.
I tried to come, too, but my dad turned to me, stopping me with a hand.
“Let me talk to her first. I’ll figure out what’s going on. ”
“Okay,” I said, nodding as my heart hammered in my chest.
If anyone could get to the bottom of this, it was my father.