12. Bowen
CHAPTER 12
BOWEN
I slam my laptop closed. There’s a reason I don’t listen to that damn podcast. The coward behind the robot voice has made a full career out of talking shit about my family. But I hardly slept and when I woke up before the sun, something told me to tune in.
The visit from a professional football team, the mayor cutting off our water… I knew the gossip would be too good to resist. But I didn’t expect them to drag Priya into it and I’m fucking furious.
I don’t know who the host is, but I’m about ready to find out. Hearing Priya’s name on that show sent me down a rabbit hole I never intended to go down. One episode turned into two, into three. Before I knew it, I’d listened to more hours of Boots and Bitching than any sane person ever should.
But maybe that’s the point. Because the more I listen, the more the plan starts forming in my mind. One piece at a time, clicking into place. And when it’s all there, clear and sharp, I know exactly what I have to do.
Last night, Callum yanked me away from the Southern Knights before the fireworks inside of me could ignite… It pissed me off.
The memory of the smug look on Gunner Thompson’s face makes my blood boil and my fists twitch at my sides even now. If I’d been given even a second more, I don’t know if I could have stopped myself from swinging at him. Maybe I wouldn’t have even tried.
Maybe I should have gone for it. Taking a few swings on those jackasses would’ve felt good. But I knew even in the moment that he was right to do it. Knowing something is for the best and accepting it are two different things.
But my brothers have a knack for coming through for me when I need them the most… And I needed them. The night whipped from good to bad so fast I didn’t see it coming.
I had the highest of highs when I held Priya in my arms. Being with her and having her naked body against mine was beyond anything I could have dreamt. The sex was mind-blowing. All of that pure, unadulterated bliss between us last night shattered into something unrecognizable in a fucking instant.
Waking up alone was one thing. It was an unwelcome surprise at best. But finding my girl in a room with her ex and without her clothes was a fucking punch to the gut. The thought makes me sick even now as I flip open my laptop at my kitchen table.
Things with Priya have never been fake, not for me. She’s different. She changes the way I see things, the way I see myself. And now, with her gone, everything feels wrong. It’s time I stop falling back on my usual bullshit excuses. I’m not serious about any of this. I don’t care. None of it really matters. Because it does.
I’ve spent so long convincing myself I’m not built for long-term love, that I’m not capable of it. But Priya and I have the kind of connection you can’t move on from. That’s why moving on from Priya isn’t a part of the plan. But I’d be kidding myself if I didn’t recognize that I’ve got a lot of ground to cover if I’m going to keep her in my world.
Knock. Knock.
Three hours and a full pot of coffee into my morning, two sharp taps rattle my front door. I don’t bother getting up. Whoever it is isn’t as important as what I’m working through. My fingers furiously click across my keyboard.
Knock. Knock.
I let out a frustrated sigh at the distraction. I hope it’s Priya.
“Hey man, get your pants on, we’re coming in.” Calllum’s voice outside of my door pairs with the sound of my door handle turning.
It’s not Priya.
“What the hell are you doing?” I bark as Callum strides inside like he owns the place.
Before I can throw him out, Alex, Geoffrey, Holden, and Hunkleberry, our farm dog, file in right behind him like the damn Scooby-doo gang. This is the last thing I want right now.
“Damn, why not bring fucking Danner too at this point.” I’m on my feet in an instant, hands out in full protest. “Y’all need to get the hell out. I’m working on something.”
“Relax,” Alex says, rolling his eyes. He pulls out a chair across from me and has the absolute audacity to put a hand out and close my laptop. “If you’d shown up for work, we wouldn’t have to stage a damn rescue mission.”
Holden opens a cabinet and pulls out a mug. Then he helps himself to the last cup of my coffee. “Thought you were dead,” he adds with a muffled laugh.
I ignore the coffee crime in a deliberate decision to be the bigger man and turn back to the scene at my kitchen table. Alex and Geoffrey sit across from me while Callum throws his big-ass body down on my recliner. These dudes have got to fucking go. I don’t have time for this. Hunkleberry lays on the couch with his head resting on the arm staring out of the back window. He’s the only one with any damn sense around here.
“Dammit Alex, I sent you a text. People take days off. I’m taking one of my probably four thousand accumulated sick days. Truth be told, I’d like to get back to it right about now.” I wave them off then return my attention to my screen.
But Alex continues with the kind of arrogant bravado I’ve come to expect from my older brother. “You’re just gonna hide in here and?—”
“I don’t remember giving you any pushback when Cassidy came around and you decided that having Cassidy on your lap was more important than getting shit done around the ranch,” I snap, and even as the words leave my mouth I know I’ve gone too far.
Alex’s eyes flair at the mention of Cassidy’s name and I watch the muscles in his jaw clench. I realize he might hit me in my own kitchen and I brace myself for the impact. If he does, I’m fine with it. In fact, I’m looking for a fight right now. Then his eyes pan from me to Holden and Geoffrey, and back again. He hesitates and then I watch the heat in him dissipate.
“Bowen, I’m trying to be patient.” Alex’s words come out through clenched teeth.
He is trying to be patient.
“Yeah, what the fuck dude?” Callum puts a hand on my shoulder and I shrug him off immediately. “Listen, we aren't trying to blow up your pity party. We came here because you need to get out of your own way and fix this with Priya. You’re an idiot if you don’t. She wasn’t doing nothing with that dude last night. He’s an asshole that took advantage of a situation."
I drum my fingers across the table as Callum regales me with conclusions that I already fucking came to on my own.
Callum continues, “Just suck it up and find a way to get things back on track.”
“I know,” I snap right back at him and the words erupt out of me. “What the hell do you think I’ve been doing all morning? In fact, I was halfway to fixing this damn thing before y’all showed up in here. Now I’m watching this jackass sip my last cup of coffee while y’all take up all my thinking space and put your damn boots all over my carpet. Get out so I can do this. Leave the dog.”
My words evaporate the air in the room and when I look up, they’re all staring at me like I grew a second head.
“What?” I huff. “You think I don’t know? I’m not an idiot. I know exactly what I have in Priya. I’m not about to let that slip away. I don’t have any options, you don’t get two chances at a woman like that. I can’t fuck it up.” Saying it out loud takes all the bite out of me.
I choose Priya and I’m going to fight for her with everything I’ve got. This is me running straight into the fire instead of slinking away because she’s worth it. I can’t control how she reacts, but I can damn well make sure she knows I’m not the one going anywhere.
The guys exchange glances with each other. I note the raised eyebrows and the way Holden mouths the word wow at Callum. A full minute of silence echoes and something unspoken passes between the guys. It’s Alex who stands first, tugging at the fabric of his jeans.
“Well, yeah. Okay then. I think we’ve made it clear.” He bites back a smirk. “In that case, we’ll leave you to it. Y’all come on, we’ve got work to do.”
"Great, yeah. If y’all will excuse the fuck out of me, I’d like to get back to work too." My words are laced with frustrated sarcasm. They are burning up my time. I stand and pull my front door open gesturing for the guys to walk out. “Y’all wanted to blow in here like the damn Paw Patrol, let’s see that speed on the way out too. Here we go. Right this way.”
“We got it, damn.” Callum lets out a chuckle and I can’t help but join in.
They mean well even if they drive me crazy.
Alex’s brows knit together like he’s debating whether to push further before he steps out. “Do you need anything from us?”
“No.” The word comes out on autopilot before I think better of it. “Maybe…”
The guys freeze and I close the front door with the whole gang still inside my house. “What the hell do we know about this damn podcast host?”
Silence hangs for a beat. Then, Geoffrey lets out a low whistle.
“ Boots and Bitching ?” Alex asks, crossing his arms.
I nod.
Holden cracks his knuckles. “You looking for a name, an address, or something a little more... persuasive?”
I shake my head, jaw tight. “I just want to know who the hell I’m dealing with. If they’re running their mouth about Priya, I’m not about to sit back and let it happen.”
Callum watches me for a second longer, then nods. “We’ll find out.”