32. Chapter 32
Chapter 32
River
T he rain pelts my umbrella as I sprint down the sidewalk and into the cafe, where I promised I’d meet Betty.
After that first opening night of the rodeo, we’d run into each other a few times, and traded numbers. We’d been able to wrangle her out for a girls’ night, but haven’t made time since. We’re long overdue to catch up on this thing called life.
Shaking out the umbrella, I immediately spot her at a small table toward the back, a mug already in her hands.
“Hey, so sorry I’m late.”
“No worries. I’m off tonight, so I’m not in any rush,” she stands to pull me into a hug. Betty was thin back in high school, but now womanhood has graced her with curves to accompany the narrow waist and mile-long legs. She’s no longer Beckett’s kid sister when I look at her.
“That makes two of us. I swear this rodeo season might kill me.”
She snickers, sipping her drink while I order mine and several pastries.
“Do you like it, though?” she questions.
“Oh, I love it. So much more than I ever thought I would, but I’m exhausted. Work has been busy, and with Gray still recovering and becoming a farm girl… well, it’s a lot,” I chuckle.
“You two seem happy,” she casts her eyes down.
“We are. But tell me about you. Catch me up on everything since I left town before.” I lean back in my chair, smiling wide.
Betty had been such a cool girl in school. Though I was older, we all wanted a bit of the popularity that came with being her friend. I got a taste of it because Beckett and I were close, but I wouldn’t say we were friends back then.
“There’s not much to tell. I work at the bar most days. Never left Cole County. That’s it, really.”
“You never left for school? Are you dating? Married?”
I immediately cringe at the questions I asked. I’ve never been one of those women who thought we needed to follow societal norms because that’s what we’re told or see in the media. My mother expected me to marry well and be just like her. She enjoyed being a stay-at-home Mom and was always there to receive us. I know I’m not the type. It’s not in my DNA to just be around my house, cooking, cleaning, chasing kids.
I always wanted more than Cole County had to offer, though I have always loved the charm of the place. It’s a place that nestles in your heart as home. It’s just that the opportunities aren’t the same for a woman in a profession like mine.
“Um, no. No one I’m really interested in here.” Her cheeks flush, those fawn freckles that always made her seem more girl next door, despite her loud personality becoming less visible under the rose hue.
I instantly want to ask if she’s still hung up on Nash Donovan. We all knew back in the day. He might have been the only one who didn’t. He’s eight years older than her, so of course he wouldn’t have noticed Betty back then, but he was in Beckett’s extended group of friends. The two proved to be a dream team on the football field.
“How about you? Are you settling in nicely at the practice? Is it really all men for partners?”
Another flinch rings through my body. “I wish I could say I was. My partners are… something else, to put it nicely.”
“You know one of the docs is selling his place in the next town over. You should consider buying it. Open your own office and then you don’t have to deal with crappy men.” Her hazel eyes shining bright.
I give her a wan smile. It’s a great idea, but one that would take more energy and attention than I have to give right now. Plus, those men would give me hell if I decided to leave and the patients followed. Though they are infuriating, it’s helpful to be associated with them. We have athletes from all over the state and sometimes even across state lines who come to us.
They come to consult with me.
Not to mention the hospital affiliation. That would be a whole slew of research just determining if I could keep those privileges if I struck out on my own. No, it’s not something that I can think about right now.
Maybe down the road. I worked too hard to get where I am and need to live that life a little more for now.
My coffee and plate of goodies is placed in front of me. “Those look delicious,” Betty practically drools.
“Please have some. If I eat all of these myself, Gray is going to think I’m pregnant.” I immediately wish the words would funnel back down my throat. I don’t know where they came from.
We’d had the awkward conversation about my response to his talk of marriage and babies and he understands, but he hasn’t stopped making the comments. He wants that life with me, and part of me wants it with him, but I need the respect of my colleagues more right now.
Betty freezes mid-chew, staring at me. “Are you… trying?” She tosses the cherry-filled croissant onto the plate, covering her mouth, her eyes saucers in her head. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have asked that. It’s none of my business.”
“No. It’s okay. We’re not. Though I think Gray would like for me to accidentally get pregnant.”
“And you don’t want that?” she questions.
As if my soul needed someone to divulge my concerns to, the words spill out of me. A torrent of all the things weighing me down freely, escaping to a third party who has no stake in the game of my life.
“I love Gray, and maybe someday I can want all the domestic things, but no, I don’t want to get pregnant or married. Not anytime soon, at least. I get enough shit for moving in with him.” Betty’s eyes narrow on me quizzically. “It’s like this. My whole career, I have had to prove myself to every man. Ortho isn’t a woman’s specialty most of the time. Definitely not trauma ortho or sports medicine, but it’s what I chose. I’ve had to deal with them telling me I don’t have the innate strength, and I should have picked a different specialty more suited to my womanly duties and having children.”
“Oh, River,” Betty places a hand on mine.
“It was easier to become this tough woman who doesn’t take shit and swore all those things off so I could prove I am worthy of the career I chose.”
“You don’t have to prove anything to anyone but yourself,” Betty whispers.
A humorless laugh puffs out of me. “Gray says the same thing to me. It’s why we understand each other so well. We’ve both spent our adult lives trying to prove to everyone else we are more than they think of us.”
“Yeah, he and Tate have always been a huge thing around here. Pretty much since Tate left and went pro.”
“It’s a lot to carry, and I’m sorry I just dumped that on you, but thanks for listening.” I take a large gulp of my coffee before stuffing half a danish in my mouth.
“Thank you for trusting me. I know we were never really friends before, but I am here if you ever need to talk.”
“You know, I am going to take you up on that.” We cheers, and then we’re off to more fun topics than the woes of life.