32. Clara
CLARA
Iwrap my arms tighter around Cole’s neck, kissing him with everything that I have, moaning when he returns the kiss with just as much gusto, his big hand wrapping around the back of my head and holding me close, taking all that I’m willing to give.
Pulling away, I’m practically panting as I stare at him, noticing a fire in his heavy-lidded eyes. And I suddenly want him. More than anything right now, I want Cole, in every way.
“Stay with me,” I breathe out, looking between his eyes. “Please?”
Cole’s gaze roves my face, searching my eyes, falling to my lips before meeting my gaze once again and arching a brow. “Yeah?”
I nod quickly, urgently.
He releases a breath, looking at me as if I invented beer or something, and I can’t help but flash him a shy smile he returns with a dimpled grin.
And then his lips are on mine again, the kiss a little filthy this time.
The way his tongue licks into my mouth, stroking mine, I feel it between my thighs and I can’t contain the whimper that slips out of my mouth and into his, causing a deep groan to rumble from the back of his throat.
“I need a shower, baby,” Cole grits out against my lips.
“No,” I whine in objection, shaking my head and urging his mouth back to mine with a murmured, “I need you.”
This time Cole pulls away, leaving me breathless as he stares at me, searching my eyes.
“What is it?” I pant out, suddenly worried I’ve said or done something wrong.
“Say that again,” he rasps.
Lust fogs my brain and it takes me a second, but when I realize what he’s asking, I lean in, pressing my forehead against his. Staring deep into his eyes, I say, “I need you.”
“Fuck.” Cole closes his eyes on a ragged breath, his hands moving to my ass, and in one seamless motion, he stands, lifting me with him and stealing my breath.
I wrap my arms and legs around him and he walks us inside.
I bury my face into the crook of his neck, breathing him in.
He smells of leather and sweat, and the spicy scent that is all him.
I moan again, pressing a kiss to his skin, licking and sucking him, devouring him.
Seconds later, we’re in my bedroom—Cole’s bedroom—the dim light of the lamp on the nightstand illuminating the space in a soft glow as I’m deposited onto the bed. Resting back on my hands, I stare up at him, my chest heaving with shallow breaths.
Cole removes his hat, placing it onto the tallboy before staring down at me.
His eyes roam over me slowly, darkening the second they zero in on my slightly parted thighs.
I almost close them. Almost. But when he licks his bottom lip, thumb coming up to wipe the damp trail of his tongue while he continues his steady assessment of me, I open up a little more to him when he meets my eyes.
“What do you want, Clara?” he drawls, his voice low and throaty, borderline dangerous.
I allow my own gaze to trail down, taking in the way his T-shirt skims over the defined muscles underneath, to the jeans that tug tight enough I can see the way his erection strains against the denim.
I’m forced to press my thighs together in some pathetic attempt to quell the ache between them, but it’s in vain because I’m too far gone.
I need him. And it’s both confusing and terrifying because I haven’t felt this need in so long, maybe even ever.
“I… want you,” I manage through my thickening throat.
“You got me, baby,” he says, holding his arms out at his sides. “I’m right here. But I need you to use your words, to tell me exactly what you want.”
I lick my suddenly dry lips, nervous, gaping up at him as he watches me, waiting.
“I want you to—” I swallow hard, briefly considering my words. “Claim me. Make me yours.”
With a deep inhale, Cole closes his eyes for a moment, like my words physically affect him.
I see his Adam’s apple bob, his chest hitching a touch.
Looking at me again, he releases his breath, arching a brow as he takes a step closer to me.
He reaches behind his shoulder, and in one swift move, he pulls his T-shirt over his head, tossing the discarded clothing off to the side of the room, and holy shit.
I don’t know where to look first. His chest is broad, muscular pecs, dusted with hair and inked with tattoos, leading to an impressive pack of stacked abs that pull and constrict with every one of his breaths, and another light trail of hair that disappears down into the waist of his jeans.
He’s perfection in its finest form, and I am a puddle of wanton need.
As if he can read my mind, Cole flashes me a smirk tinged with cockiness as his hands move to his belt buckle, releasing it and unfastening the button of his jeans.
Ever so slowly, he tugs down the zipper, the sound of the teeth releasing almost echoing throughout the silence of the room.
And as I stare at the way the denim hangs open, the way his cock strains against his black briefs, I feel my heart lurch into the back of my throat.
This is happening. This is actually happening.
Kicking off his boots, Cole takes another step toward the bed and reaches out, gently pinching my chin between his thumb and forefinger, forcing my eyes up to his. “What else do you want?”
“I want you to take control,” I whisper on a stifled whimper, surprising myself with my words. “I need you to take control.”
Cole releases another shuddering breath. “You trust me?”
I nod. “I do. And I know no matter what, you’ll never hurt me.”
“Never.” He shakes his head vehemently, pressing one knee onto the mattress, then the other until he’s right there, kneeling in front of me on the bed, his body looming over me in the least intimidating way.
“Tell me to stop and I will, okay?”
I nod again.
“Words, baby,” he rasps in a low warning.
“Yes,” I pant out, and honestly, I’m so desperate I’m barely holding on. I don’t even know what I’m agreeing to. But yes. With Cole, I have a gut instinct that it will always be yes.
With a soft, knowing smile, he stares deep into my eyes as his fingers trail downwards, finding the hem of my T-shirt before inching it up. “Arms up, darlin’.”
I lift my arms and he tugs my T-shirt over my head, tossing it off to the side and then, allowing his gaze to trail down over my breasts.
He cups my cheek, ducks down, and licks into my mouth, forcing me back down onto the bed and kissing me so deeply, I feel his lips and his tongue in every part of my body.
Cole is careful as he lays on top of me, keeping his weight to the side while nestling his hips between my thighs, his warm, hard body pressed against mine as he continues kissing me.
His hand moves from my jaw, fingers dancing over my skin as they trail down over the swell of my breast, grazing my pebbled nipple.
I suck in a breath, my back arching off the bed when he teases the sensitive bud, drawing featherlight circles around it, and I feel him grin against my lips, knowing exactly what he’s doing to me, before he continues down over my ribs, my stomach, stopping at the waist of my sleep shorts and toying at the sensitive skin.
I part my thighs further, wanting him closer, and when his hips shift against me, his hard length grazes my center and my head falls back into the pillow, my mouth parting on a soft moan.
“Shhh.” Cole seals my mouth with his, swallowing my sounds when he does it again, and again, each thrust of his hips hitting me just right and sending a flame of desire through my body.
Dipping his hand into the waist of my shorts, Cole growls when his fingers reach my center, and he rips his lips from mine, pulling back just enough to stare deep into my eyes.
“Chrissake, Clara,” he bites out. “You’re so fuckin’ wet.” He trails his thick middle finger up and down my slit, studying me closely as he does. “Is this okay?”
I nod, closing my eyes when his thumb finds my clit, rubbing it slowly, but with the perfect amount of pressure. I swear I see stars.
“Ohmygod,” I choke out.
“I know, I know,” he coos in a way that warms my veins. “You’re so needy, huh?”
I nod frantically, moaning again.
“You gotta be quiet, baby,” he murmurs against the corner of my mouth, peppering kisses across my cheek before I feel his breath fan against the shell of my ear. “Can you be quiet for me?”
I clamp my bottom lip between my teeth, stifling my own sounds when I feel the tip of his finger slide into me, and I nod again, closing my eyes so tight.
“That’s my good fuckin’ girl,” he gruffs into my ear, easing his finger in and out, edging deeper with every pass as he continues rubbing my clit. “So tight and warm.”
God, I’m so close. Already. Embarrassingly close. The coil in the pit of my belly is starting to tighten, tingles surging up and down my limbs.
Cole kisses his way back to my mouth, tongue sliding between my lips and thrusting deep inside as he slides a second finger inside of me making me mewl with need.
“Can I taste you?”
I freeze from his whispered question, pulling away from his lips to meet his eyes. “T-taste me?”
He nods, and I see the hint of a devilish smirk ghost his lips.
“You mean…” I trail off, unable to say the words.
He nods again, dimples popping as his smirk morphs into a full-watt grin. Leaning in close again, he grazes my lips as he says, “I wanna eat your pussy, darlin.”
I swallow hard, trying not to openly freak out, but my silence and the way my entire body stiffens must be a dead giveaway judging by the way Cole’s smile disappears, replaced by a stark look of worry.
“Hey, baby, it’s okay,” he whispers. “We don’t have to.”
“No, I—” Stopping myself, I lick my lips, thinking of my words. “It’s okay, I’ve just… I’ve never—”
Cole’s eyes flare, causing me to stop mid-sentence. “You’ve… never?”
I shake my head, suddenly mortified because, yes, I’m thirty-three years old and I’ve never had a man go down on me.
Cole’s eyes turn hard, brows knitting, a deep crease burrowing between them as he steadies me with a steely look.
I immediately assume he’s angry at me, but then he cups my cheek so contradictingly tender, searching my eyes.
“Baby, please let me,” he begs, kissing my lips.
“I want it more than anything.” Another kiss.
“Let me be the first man to taste you.” Kiss.
“The only fuckin’ man to taste you.” Kiss.
“Ever.” His kiss turns searing, his tongue lapping into my mouth in a way that sparks a flame low in my belly.
I’m nodding, despite the trepidation that twists in my chest.
“Yeah?”
“Yes,” I pant out. “Actually, no!”
He stills, pulling back again, quirking one brow, understandably confused.
“Ohmygod, I don’t know.” I groan, covering my face with my hand.
“Clara.” Cole says my name like it’s a warning, his gruff voice low and gravelly. Wrapping his fingers around my wrist, he gently yet forcefully pulls my hand away. “Look at me.”
Opening one eye, I meet his stare.
“Talk to me, darlin’.”
I stare deep into his gaze seeing nothing but a tender concern in his eyes.
“I… I-I have a—” Oh god, this is harder than I ever imagined it might be. It doesn’t help that he’s basically a Greek god, so much younger than me, and I know he’s had his fair share of women who, I’m almost certain, look nothing like me naked.
“What is it, baby?” Cole presses gently.
“I have a caesarean scar,” I say under my breath. “And it’s… right there.”
Silence ensues and it’s rife with something weighty, Cole’s gaze unrelenting as his eyes bore into mine.
And I kind of wish I’d said nothing. Let him do his thing and be silently disgusted, but I didn’t want him to freak out.
I don’t think my limited self-confidence could handle seeing him recoil with his face between my thighs.
“Forget it,” I mutter, trying to roll over and away from him because right now, I want to crawl under the bed and hide until he gives up and leaves.
“Hey, c’mon now.” Cole stops me. “Look at me.”
Reluctantly I do look at him, feeling my cheeks burn.
“Clara,” he begins, pausing a moment to study me so carefully, taking in every part of me like he’s memorizing the finer details of my face.
“You are the most beautiful woman, inside and out. Your body is incredible. These tits…” He palms my breast rough, his thumb rolling over my aching nipple, teasing a moan out of me.
“The things you do to me, baby, without even realizing. Every inch of you drives me in-fuckin-sane in the best kinda way. And I like every part of you.”
I swallow the sudden emotion that sticks to the back of my throat.
“And your scars,” Cole continues. “The ones on your skin, and the ones inside, the ones you’ve learned to hide, they make up the incredibly strong and courageous woman and mama that you are.
And I—” He stops then, licking his lips, his gaze bouncing between mine as if he’s considering his words.
“And I… love every fuckin’ part of you.”
My lips part on a gasp, shocked by his admission.
He… loves me. I thought that was what he was alluding to earlier when he told me he cares about me, but right here, right now, the way he says the word.
Love. I know without a doubt he means it.
And I know without even more of a doubt that I love him too.
“I-I know it’s… fast,” Cole stammers softly, his thumb trailing the curve of my Cupid’s bow.
“And it’s new and it’s… fuckin’ scary because I ain’t ever loved no one before.
But it’s true and I need you to know that…
because I love you.” A thick swallow works down his throat.
“I’m in love with you. You and every single one of your scars. ”
“I love you, too,” I confess under my breath, my words trembling through the emotion racking though me.
Cole groans, burying his face into the crook of my neck. “I was really hopin’ you did, baby,” he murmurs against my skin with a relieved sigh.
I can’t help but smile, closing my eyes at the feel of his lips kissing me, sucking me, his tongue dragging over my trigger point making my toes immediately curl.
Lifting his head, Cole meets my eyes again, lips curling with a smirk. “So, is that a yes?”
Oh god, I almost forgot what we were talking about. My cheeks flame. Biting down on my bottom lip, I stifle my shy smile and close my eyes, nodding my approval.
“I’m gonna need you to open those pretty eyes, baby,” Cole grits against my mouth, and I do, meeting his lust filled stare. “Because I wanna look directly into them when I make you come on my tongue.”