Chapter Twenty-One
Alexia
Holed up in the back of the auto-parts store, I was wholly unaware of time as I buried myself in the intricacies of the Wild Stallions’ corporate enterprise. It was Benson who stuck his head in, offering me lunch partway through the day. I ate it at the desk he was gracious enough to let me borrow, barely tasting it as it went down. While I knew I didn’t need to absorb the entire legal history of the club in one sitting, I found comfort in having something to occupy my mind so completely.
I wasn’t sure how late it was when my man rapped his knuckles against the open door, and I frowned in confusion at the sight of Jed freshly showered. Rather than his coveralls, he was wearing the jeans he had on that morning and a new white tee underneath his kutte. His hair was damp, and as he entered the office, the intoxicating smell of sandalwood wafted in with him.
“Did you go home? What time is it?”
“Almost six,” he answered, rounding the front of the desk. He propped himself against the empty space beside me and clarified, “Showered and changed at the clubhouse. We can stop by my place if you need, but figured we’d head to dinner from here. You ‘bout done?”
“Yeah. Yeah, I can be,” I answered with a nod.
I shut my laptop and closed out of the files I had open on the company desktop. As I did so, I realized I’d not spent a minute of my day preparing for dinner with my family. I had some serious explaining to do, and I had no idea what I was going to tell them. Not to mention, it was going to be mami’s first time meeting Jed.
Needless to say, it was bound to be an eventful night.
I was already a little exhausted thinking about it.
“Hey,” Jed called softly as I slid my laptop into my purse. “Need to tell you somethin’ before we go.”
I froze, shifting my gaze to find his, not at all liking the sound of that.
“Okay.”
“Detective Kendrick came by a couple hours ago. Hoffman was identified as the shooter. Haven’t been payin’ attention to the news, but a press conference was scheduled for this evenin’. Might have happened already. The public will be informed that he’s a wanted man.”
My stomach suddenly felt heavy, the news settling inside of me like a rock. Suspecting the man was one thing. Knowing for certain it had been him was disturbing.
Sure, the man had threatened me to my face, but I never imagined it would be him pulling the trigger. Moreover, given his cut ties with the Stallions, his attempt on my life was so much more than a threat made from a position of power. He had no power, which made him desperate—and desperate people like him were worse than dangerous.
“So—he’s wanted. Does that mean, um, they don’t have him?”
“He’s in the wind. They’re lookin’ for him. So are we. A few of us are goin’ on the hunt. Truth be told, I hope we find the son-of-a-bitch first.”
“Wait,” I muttered with a shake of my head. Now feeling a little sick to my stomach, I swallowed and asked, “You’re not going, right? You’re not going after him? You’re not leaving?”
“No, darlin’,” he assured me. He reached for my face, taking hold of my chin as he continued. “I’m not leavin’ you. Until this whole thing is over, and I’m sure you’re safe, you are my mission. Bull, Mav, and Mustang hit the road ‘bout an hour ago.”
My eyes began to burn as my relief was replaced by extreme guilt.
“Are you kidding? You’re staying with me, but the men tied to each of my friends are all leaving? Jed—I can’t do that to them! What if—”
“It’s done, gorgeous. And they went ‘cause they wanted to. Nobody ordered it. Not Bull, not me, certainly not you. Those bullets may have been pointed at you, and you sure as hell are mine, but each one of them took it personally. Trust me when I say, this is bigger than it seems. We need answers, and there’s only one way we’re gonna get ‘em. That’s if we get to Hoffman first.
“As for my brothers on the road, their ol’ ladies know the deal. When a Stallion’s gotta ride, she lets him go. You’ll experience that truth one day—just not today.”
I closed my eyes, freeing a couple of tears as I furrowed my brow.
What a nightmare , I thought.
Jed told me it wasn’t my fault, but I couldn’t shake the feeling that I was partly to blame. If I’d stayed at the firm, if I’d walked away from the Stallions offer, Hoffman would have been a problem, but maybe a problem that could have been solved differently.
I had no idea what it took to hunt down a man in the wind, but I knew if the cops couldn’t find him with all their resources, it wasn’t going to be an easy task for Roy, Kade, and Mustang. And while I had a pretty good sense that none of them were afraid of a fight, going up against a man with nothing to lose was a risk beyond measure.
“Lex, darlin’, look at me,” Jed insisted, taking my head in both of his hands as he swept my tears away with his thumbs.
I blinked open my eyes in search of his and pulled in a shuddered breath.
“If anyone should be afraid, it’s Hoffman. Hear me? He’s a coward in a suit. He started a fight he can’t win, and he knows it. The only one better than me at a trackin’ a man who doesn’t want to be found is Maverick. With Mustang and Bull at his back, they’ll be gone three maybe four days at most. This isn’t our first rodeo, gorgeous. Just yours.”
I coughed out a humorless laugh, realizing how right he was.
When I stopped to think of all the awful and terrible things I’d endured over the past month, as I looked beyond my own fear and considered the men who had my back, I had to admit none of them even flinched. Not once. This was the world in which they lived.
“I just want it to be over,” I whispered.
“It will be. Soon.”
Soon .
As my mother had said not long ago—the most ambiguous measure of time one could think of.
“Come on. Let’s get out of here. We don’t want to be late for dinner.”
I nodded, and he let me go to finish gathering my things. When I stood, he took me by the hand and led me to the parking lot. After he stowed my purse in his saddlebag, we mounted his Harley and took off toward my childhood home.
The evening was warm, and the wind in my hair felt nice. I didn’t know I needed the ride, but after being cooped up all day, the fresh air was invigorating. Getting to cruise the streets wrapped around my man was like balm to an aching wound. It was impossible to forget that I was at his back because he wasn’t going to let me go anywhere on my own until he was sure it was safe for me to do so—but regardless of the reason, Jed on his hog was my version of a prince on his steed.
As we turned into the neighborhood, he slowed down and I pointed out which house was our destination. I sucked in a deep breath when I saw not just two but three vehicles parked out front. I’d successfully avoided Alejandro for weeks, and it seemed my streak was over.
Jed parked along the curb, behind Alejo’s car, cutting off the engine before he lowered his kickstand. As I began to pull away from him, he stopped me, gently taking hold of one of my wrists as he twisted to look back at me from over his shoulder.
“Anything I oughta know before we go in there?”
I glanced toward the house and sighed. “Yeah. It looks like the gang’s all here. I haven’t seen or spoken to Alejo since that night at the storage unit. And mami and Bella don’t know he got me kidnapped or why we haven’t spoken in a month. As for my present troubles, they’re completely in the dark about that, too.”
“Darlin’, I thought you were close,” he muttered in confusion.
“We are. I just—I don’t like to burden them. They have enough to worry about without my problems. And, to be honest, I still haven’t figured out what I plan on telling them tonight. But I know mami will demand answers, and I don’t want to lie.”
With his free hand, he took hold of my left thigh and gave me a squeeze. “So how do we play this? You want me to keep my mouth shut or what?”
A small smile played at my lips as I leaned into him, pressing my chest against his back once more. For a second, I felt a little lighter, remembering who Jed was. He was more than a handsome face or a wall of muscle—he was in this with me.
My chin resting on his shoulder, I murmured, “If I start to drown, I’d love a life vest.”
“You got it, gorgeous.”
“You actually ride on the back of that thing? Who are you, and what have you done with my sister?”
I straightened as I turned in the direction of Isabella’s voice. She was standing in the open doorway with her hands on her hips.
“Honestly, I thought I was the fun one,” she called out with a shake of her head.
“Guess that’s our cue,” I said softly before moving to dismount the Harley.
Jed followed my lead, cutting across the lawn toward the house. Bella didn’t move as we approached but threw her arms around me as soon as I was in reaching distance.
“I don’t know what’s going on with you, hermana , but it’s good to see you,” she whispered. “Mami refuses to stay away from the news, and it’s not been the least bit reassuring.”
“Thanks for the warning,” I replied with a squeeze.
She pulled away, but only enough to look me in the eye before she added, “Also, Alejo’s clear-eyed but jittery as hell.”
“Anything else?” I asked, curious if we’d ever cross the threshold.
Bella grinned. “I hope you’re hungry. Mami made all your favorites. And I do mean all of them.”
I laughed, pleased to have an excuse to do so, then took my sister by the shoulders, encouraging her to turn and head inside. As soon as we stepped foot into the main room, I could smell dinner. For the first time in twenty-four hours, I actually felt hungry, and I was looking forward to eating a little of everything.
Then I saw him.
Alejandro.
He stood at the mouth of the kitchen, his head bowed as he squeezed the back of his neck anxiously. His gaze drifted between Jed and me a few times before he settled his attention on me.
“Hey, you,” he murmured.
At first, I didn’t say anything in response. I’d been through so much since that first kidnapping, it almost felt like nothing by comparison. Except, it wasn’t nothing. The way he’d used me wasn’t something I could forget—and while I wanted to forgive him, I knew our relationship wasn’t going to heal in a single night.
But I did want it to heal, which meant I had to meet him halfway.
I forced a small smile and replied, “Hey, you.”
Instantly, his shoulders relaxed, and he dropped his hand, standing a little straighter. His eyes shifted toward Jed again. He cleared his throat uncomfortably and folded his arms across his chest before looking down at his feet.
“Alejo—you remember Jed, don’t you?” I challenged.
He glanced up, but only for a second, his eyes pointed toward his feet as he answered, “Yeah. Hey.”
Jed didn’t return his cowardly greeting, and I didn’t blame him.
“Wait, you two have met?” asked Bella. “When? I just barely found out about him.”
“Alexia?” called mami, inadvertently saving Alejandro as she brushed past him, headed straight for me. “Oh, thank God,” she breathed, pulling me into her arms. “I cannot believe this. I truly cannot believe this. Have you seen the news, hija ? The man who shot at you is still out there.”
“Yes, I know.” I hugged her tight, just as much for me as for her. “But I’m safe, mami. I promise. They’ll find him.”
“I just don’t understand—” She started and then stopped as she pulled away from me, clearly noticing Jed for the first time. “Oh. Hello,” she breathed, taking a step back.
I watched as she took him in. She then frowned at me, as if to silently express he wasn’t at all what she was expecting.
“Mami, this is Jed.”
“Mrs. Torres, it’s nice to meet you,” he said, extending his hand in offering.
Hesitantly, she placed her hand in his and hummed, “Mmhmm.” She then looked to me and insisted, “Alexia—a word, please.”
She turned toward the kitchen, and I stifled a sigh. Reaching for Jed, I traced my fingers across his tatted forearm and whispered, “Sorry. I’ll be right back.”
Mami was waiting for me at the kitchen island, her expression a warning in and of itself.
I stood opposite her, willing myself to be patient.
“I didn’t understand why anyone on this earth could possibly want to harm you—but then you bring that man into my house, and I suddenly wonder if I have my answer.”
My eyes widened, appalled by her no-holds-barred statement.
“Mami!” I cried on a gasp.
“You told me he was a mechanic. You didn’t tell me he was part of a motorcycle gang.”
“Oh, my gosh,” I breathed, taking a step back as I gaped at the woman I thought I knew. In all my thirty-three years, I’d never known her to be so quick to judge. “You can’t be serious? Have you forgotten who you’re talking to? I’m your most responsible child, and you think I’ve given my heart to a gang member?”
“Given your heart? To the tattooed man in that vest?” She huffed a sigh, as if I was the one being preposterous. “Alexia, since you’ve started seeing that man, you’ve been skipping mass. You changed your job—a job, I presume, with a description you weren’t as forthcoming about as I thought. You’ve made an enemy of a man outrageous enough to try to kill you. Are you going to stand there and tell me this Jed has nothing to do with your present circumstances?”
“You just met him. Are you going to stand there and tell me you know anything about him? I can’t believe you’re blaming him for this! He’s not in a gang , mami. It’s a club. There’s a difference.”
“Semantics, Alexia. And you’re right. I don’t know him. But I know you, and—”
“Exactly. You know me . Which means you should trust me when I tell you, Jed is the best man I’ve ever met. When I tell you I’m safe and I’ll be fine, the only reason I think that is because of him . The only reason I’ve not been swallowed up by my fear is because of him . He protects me, mami—and he would never let anything bad happen to me, which is more than I can say for even my own brother. So, don’t you dare judge Jed.”
“What?” mami asked, flinching at my words. “What has Alejo ever done to you?”
“Oh, mami…” I sighed.
“Lexi,” Alejo warned.
I jerked my gaze in the direction of his voice and found both Alejandro and Isabella standing inside the kitchen, engrossed in our argument. I could see it written all over my twin’s face—his plea for my silence. But I’d been silent long enough. I wasn’t going to let my mother paint Jed as the villain when it was the sins of her own son that pushed us together in the first place.
“A month ago, Alejo came to me for ten thousand dollars,” I began, staring right at him. “He was in debt with the drug cartel.”
“ What? No!” cried mami, horrified.
I shifted my focus her way and continued, “I didn’t have the money, but he’d already offered me as collateral. So, when he didn’t pay up, they came after me. They kidnapped me, threw me in a trunk, and held me against my will in the middle of nowhere.”
“Oh, my god,” gasped Bella.
“And you know who found me? Who saved me? Who paid the debt and saved us both? Jed. He barely even knew me then.”
Her hands lifted over her mouth, mami looked from me to her precious boy. “Alejo,” she breathed.
I pressed on, wanting to put an end to the whole exchange. “As for the shooting, Fred Hoffman made poor life decisions, and I happen to be the person he blames for his downfall, I guess. I can’t explain the thought process of a desperate man. What I do know is this—Jed is not to blame for any of it. Honestly, I think this family should know better than most that the only person responsible for their actions is the person who committed the act.
“Now, as much as I was looking forward to dinner, I think we’re just going to go. You’ve been very rude and judgmental, and I won’t ask Jed to stay and pretend he didn’t hear this entire conversation. I hope we can try again another night.”
“Wait, Lexi,” murmured Bella, taking hold of my hand as I pushed my way between her and our brother.
I paused, gave her fingers a squeeze, then pulled away. “I’ll call you later.”
She nodded, putting up no further argument, and I continued into the next room. I stopped short when I saw Jed sitting on the couch next to Giselle.
“Hey, Ellie.”
“Hi. Guess what? He knew about my piggy-cow bank, and he gave me a whole five dollars to put inside!”
I glanced at Jed, who merely shrugged in reply, and I knew in that moment, I was never going to be able to let him go. Not ever.
Speaking around the knot suddenly lodged in my throat, I replied, “That’s very sweet. Did you say thank you?”
“Mmmhmm,” my niece assured me with an enthusiastic nod.
“Well, I’m sorry we can’t stay—but I’ll see you again soon, okay?”
Her shoulders slumped as she reminded me, “But abuela made your favorites.”
“I know. You’ll have to save me some.”
“I will.”
Looking to Jed, I held out my hand. He was quick to stand and take it. I didn’t hesitate, but headed for the door and pulled him through it with me. We didn’t stop until we reached the curb.
Before he kicked his leg over his bike, he asked, “You okay?”
“A bit mortified, but otherwise fine. I’m really sorry. I never thought—”
“Hey, don’t apologize.”
I frowned, still taken aback by mami’s behavior. “I’m so tempted to stand here and make excuses for her.”
“You love her. She loves you, too. Emotions were high. Situation you’re in is shit, and she was lookin’ for someone to blame. I was an easy target.”
“But you don’t deserve that!”
“Think you made that perfectly clear,” he said with a smirk. “Proud of you. Don’t imagine that was easy.”
I stared up at him in awe.
He was a Wild Stallion. He was my beautiful mammoth. He had a hard, resilient exterior. Of course, my mother’s words weren’t strong enough to leave a mark on the likes of him. He knew who he was, and he didn’t need me to stand up for him. Even still, he’d earned the right to be upset and he wasn’t. Not even a little.
With a shake of my head, I asked, “How is it that after everything you heard, you’re the one comforting me?”
“You’re focusin’ on the worst part. It won’t be long before I forget what she said about me—but what you said? Darlin’, I hope I never forget it.”
My insides did that thing, elated that anything I said could mean so much to him. I took a step toward him, pressing my hands against his chest as I murmured, “I meant every word.”
“Right,” he drawled before moving to mount his hog. “Come on, gorgeous. We’ve got someplace to be.”
“We do?” I muttered with a furrowed brow.
“Yup. Bed. Naked. As fast as we can get there.”
The laugh that bubbled out of me took me by surprise, but I didn’t fight it or my man. Instead, I climbed on his hog and wrapped myself around him, wishing to go wherever he wanted to take me.
Jed and I spent the night mostly naked. He had his way with me in bed, then he fed me before feeding on me atop his dining room table.
Later, when I called Bella, I was in a far better mood than when I left the house. We talked for a while, and by the time we hung up, I realized I needed our chat as much as I needed Jed.
Apparently, after our rapid departure, I missed quite the argument between mami and Alejo. Part of me felt guilty for that—the part of me that had been trying to protect everyone all the time. I wanted to protect Alejandro from himself. I wanted to protect mami from the darkest parts of an addict’s life. I’d spent years trying to shoulder every burden I didn’t think anyone else in the family was strong enough to hold, and I felt guilty for dumping the load in the middle of the kitchen before walking away.
But after talking to Bella, after hearing how mami stood up for me as she laid into Alejandro for the danger he put me in, it dawned on me that it was okay for me to let it go. It was okay that I didn’t have it in me to shoulder the weight of the world. It wasn’t my responsibility to carry everyone. I had my own life and my own problems. I could love and support my family without sacrificing myself in the process.
I had no idea where Alejandro and I stood or what it would take to heal our relationship, but I had to believe we’d be okay. He’d always be my best friend, no matter what. No one would ever be able to take his spot in my heart. We knew each other in ways no one else ever could—which meant we’d find our way back to each other. Somehow. It would just take time.
It was after ten when my phone rang. I was in bed, but I was alone, so I checked to see who it was. When I saw Mami light up my screen, I took a breath before I answered it.
“Hello?”
“Alexia…” She hesitated before she murmured, “I’m sorry. I don’t know what else I can say, but I am truly sorry for the way I acted tonight. I don’t know how to begin to make it up to you.”
“I appreciate that, mami. But I don’t think it’s me you should be apologizing to.”
“Yes. You’re right. Is he there?”
I paused, shifting my gaze toward Jed’s bedroom door. He was doing his nightly walk around the house. “Um, yeah,” I stammered. “Could you hold on a moment?”
She agreed just as Jed entered the room. I pulled the phone away from my ear and glanced down at it before holding it out for him.
“It’s—it’s my mom. Uh, she’d like to speak with you.”
Jed quirked an eyebrow at me, and I nodded. Cautiously, he crossed the room, took the phone, and brought it to his ear. “Hello?”
I watched intently as he listened to what I assumed was her apology. It felt like forever that he stood there, not saying a word.
Finally, he said, “I do,” followed shortly by, “She is.” There was another pause before he asked, “Saturday?” He looked my way then replied, “So far as I know, we’re free for dinner. I’ll let Lex confirm.” Another pause. “Alright then. Goodnight.”
He hung up before handing back the phone.
“She said she’ll call you again tomorrow.”
My eyebrows knit together, I slowly accepted the device and asked, “Did you just agree to dinner on Saturday?”
“Yup,” was his simple reply as he got into bed next to me.
“Really? You don’t mind?”
“Not goin’ anywhere, darlin’. Probably best your mama and I learn to play nice.”
I tossed aside my phone and immediately moved to straddle my man, taking his face in both of my hands as I leaned in close. “Jed Barker? Where have you been all my life?”
He chuckled, folding me in his arms. “I’m here now.”
Lining my lips up with his, I nodded and breathed, “Thank God,” before sealing my gratitude with a kiss.