Chapter Fifteen
Jenna
He told me not to wait up, so I didn’t. Not exactly.
Turned out, when the man I was falling for was a tough guy—a Wild Stallion outlaw— and he sent me a vague message about a ride in the afternoon, then went hours without a follow-up call or a text, it made it a bit difficult for me to find sleep.
My stomach had been heavy with worry all night.
What exactly did it mean when he said gotta ride?
Ride where?
And why?
Was it dangerous?
I remembered that as the club’s road captain, when he said he had to ride , it meant he was riding at the front of the pack. When he’d first informed me of this, his role sounded important. Now that I’d attached myself to said road captain, I wasn’t so much impressed by the importance of his title so much as I was concerned about all the unknowns that came along with it.
The Stallions weren’t the type of bikers who took Sunday afternoon joy rides. Neither did they strike me as men who hit the road at a moment’s notice for no reason. Not to mention, I worked in an ER—I knew from experience, nothing good happened after midnight on a Monday .
I wasn’t sure what time I’d succumbed to my exhaustion, but I knew it was after midnight. Rather than be flustered by the fact that I had a hard time falling asleep without Kade after only having him completely for three nights, I merely accepted it.
I’d fought against my feelings for him long enough.
I wasn’t going to do it anymore.
When I woke with my alarm the next morning to find him in bed with me, I was grateful. He looked to be perfectly okay, even peaceful as he slumbered. It didn’t feel right to wake him, so I didn’t. Except, as I got up and got ready for the day, I realized his presence in my home hadn’t done much to assuage my worry.
He was still asleep when I left for the hospital.
The questions that swirled around my head mixed with my lack of decent sleep had me in a bit of a mood all day. It took extra effort not to let it show. Fortunately, Abbie wasn’t working during my shift, which meant I didn’t have to worry about her, too; but Logan was around, so I kept an eye on him when I could. I wasn’t sure if I’d noticed anything noteworthy, but my gut told me not to trust him. Not yet.
By the time I got to the end of my shift, I couldn’t wait to get home.
As I pulled up to my house and saw Kade’s Harley parked out front, I got a new spark of energy. Only, it wasn’t excitement to see him that coursed through me—it was my determination to get answers to the questions I’d worked so hard to keep at bay for the last fourteen hours.
I didn’t waste any time heading inside. As soon as I reached the top of the stairs, I found my man sitting on my couch, his socked feet on my coffee table, his gaze aimed at the television.
Totally cool. Totally at ease. Like nothing had happened.
When he looked my way, it dawned on me that he hadn’t so much as sent a text all day. Granted, I hadn’t either, but I wasn’t the one who’d disappeared for most of the previous night. Apparently, him finding sleep in my bed and then showing up after work was supposed to say it all.
It didn’t.
We weren’t friends-with-benefits anymore.
My heart was in this, and he owed me an explanation.
I was primed and ready to let him know this, so I didn’t hold back.
“What does it mean when you gotta ride? ”
He quirked an eyebrow at me. “Hello to you, too.”
Setting my purse at my feet, I said, “I mean it, Maverick.”
His head jerked back at my use of his road name, but I knew who I was talking to. Not Kade. Not the man who sent me roses at work or spent hours playing me his favorite vinyl records, but Maverick. The Stallion. The man who was capable of things I couldn’t even imagine.
He sat up, his feet on the ground as he replied, “Means club business.”
“And what does that mean?” I asked, folding my arms across my chest.
He was losing his patience, and I could tell—but I didn’t care.
“Means club business ,” he repeated, a scowl tugging at his brow.
I tried not to get frustrated.
I wasn’t mad, I was worried.
I didn’t want to fight, I wanted to understand.
“Is it dangerous?” I asked, going at it from a different angle.
“I’m here aren’t I?” he argued.
“Is it dangerous? ” I repeated.
“Babe—”
I could tell by his tone he was trying to placate me, so I cut him short, dropping my arms to my sides as I explained, “I don’t like surprises. I’m also not a big fan of cryptic messages.”
His scowl disappeared as he raised his eyebrows in mock surprise then turned his head to look at the roses that sat in the middle of my kitchen table. Slowly, he brought his brown eyes back to mine and stated, “So, you didn’t like the flowers. Noted.”
It was getting harder to keep a lid on my frustration.
“Stop it! I loved the roses, you smart-ass,” I cried. “What I didn’t love was going to bed wondering where my man was and if he was okay.”
As soon as I’d said the words, I couldn’t stop myself from saying more, admitting things out loud I hadn’t even fully processed in my own head.
“You said if we were going to do this, I would get all of you. That means this part, too. I can’t handle it if you keep things from me. I don’t like to be in the dark. I don’t like to be the one in the relationship that doesn’t see the bad stuff coming.”
He hesitated for a moment, and I could see him absorbing my words.
Eyeing me carefully, he replied, “Not pullin’ back that curtain, foxy. Not bein’ a dick. Keepin’ you safe.”
I took a few deep breaths, rationally deciding maybe that was for the best.
Still, he had to give me something .
“Is. It. Dangerous? ” I asked for the third time.
“Can be. Wasn’t last night.”
This did not make me feel better.
“And how often do you gotta ride? ”
“Depends. We get an outside job, once maybe twice a month. We get trouble, more than that.”
I frowned, not liking the sound of that either.
Kade got up and crossed the room. I craned my neck when he was standing right in front of me.
“Babe, none of us are reckless or stupid, and we’re never alone. Someone’s always got my back.”
That was the first thing he’d said that eased my worry, but it didn’t make it disappear.
“You text me at, like, three in the afternoon. I know you told me not to wait up, but if you’re going for a ride, couldn’t you at least—I don’t know—check in?”
He reached up then, gently curling his long fingers around the nape of my neck.
“My lady was worried,” he muttered softly.
My words got caught in my throat as I stared up at him and admitted to myself I didn’t want us to end. I’d tossed aside every made-up version of our unhappy ending in order to experience all that was real between us. I could handle the darkness he carried inside of him, understanding everyone had a little of that tucked away in themselves. What I couldn’t handle was someone else’s darkness swallowing him whole.
“Kade…” It was all I could manage to say as I reached for a fistful of his tee, pulling myself closer.
“Liked climbin’ into your bed after it was all said and done. Like your sass in an effort to hide the fact that you were scared. Don’t fuckin’ like that you were scared. Next time, I’ll check in when I can, babe.”
His promise made me feel heard, but it was his kiss that wiped away my worry.
As he sought entrance into my mouth with his tongue, I pressed up on my tiptoes, circling my arms around his shoulders, savoring the taste of him while I surrendered myself completely to his affection. He folded me into his arms, and a surge of butterflies whizzed around my stomach.
A moment later, I lost another hair tie to his wrist, and I smiled against his mouth between kisses as he buried his fingers in my thick strands.
After the hair tie, he rid me of my top. Then my bra.
I kicked my way out of my sneakers as he shrugged out of his kutte.
The kutte ended up folded on the coffee table, and his shirt was the next item of clothing to hit the floor.
It was me who was completely naked first, stretched out on my back across the couch.
Rather than feel an ounce of impatience, I felt utterly elated when Maverick got down on his knees, took hold of my legs, and threw one over each of his shoulders.
As soon as his mouth made contact with my sex, I decided I really liked this version of I’m sorry .
Given he was the best kiss I’d ever had, I was not the least bit taken aback to learn his tongue was quite good at eliciting all sorts of pleasure.
He took his time, only lifting his head after he’d reduced me to a quivering mess, my thighs pressing in on his ears as my orgasm rippled through me.
While I worked to catch my breath, he stood to his feet and unbuttoned his jeans. I watched as he shoved his clothing down over his hips, freeing his erection. He took hold of his length and stroked it a few times, his eyes pinned on me.
“Knees, foxy,” he commanded gently.
After what he’d just given me, I was more than happy to return the favor.
I couldn’t fit all of him into my mouth, but I made it work.
As I sucked and stroked, listening to the changing cadence of his breaths, I felt a new wave of arousal wash over me.
“Fuck, yes,” Kade practically growled as I reached between my legs with my free hand. Grabbing a fistful of my hair, he began to take control, guiding my head as he demanded, “Make yourself come, babe. Wanna feel you moan around my dick.”
I moaned just hearing him dole out his instructions, sucking him harder as I swirled my fingers around my swollen nub.
When I felt on the brink of another orgasm, I dropped my hand away from the base of his cock, needing desperately to hold onto something sturdy. I held the back of one of his thighs and hollowed my cheeks, picking up the pace as I started to unravel. He groaned, his fist tightening around my hair, and I was a goner.
My fingertips digging into his leg, I moaned loudly around his dick, just like he wanted.
“I’m there, babe. Mouth or tits—your choice.”
At first, I hesitated. I generally wasn’t a fan of a man coming in my mouth; but something about Kade in that moment made me want to give it another try.
Before I could make up my mind, he yanked at my hair, pulling me away from him. With his free hand, he took hold of his length and stroked himself until my chest was covered in his release.
Short of breath, I looked up at him and panted, “I thought you said it was my choice.”
“Changed my mind,” he said with a shake of his head. “My lady doesn’t swallow.”
This made me smile. It wasn’t the first time he’d told me what he would and would not allow me to do. So far, it usually worked in my favor, and I kind of liked the rules of being his woman.
“Anything else your lady doesn’t do?”
“Yeah,” he started to say, pulling up his pants. “She doesn’t clean me off her when I’m done. Be right back.”
I watched him make his way to the bathroom, then listened as he started the tap. A minute later, he came back with a warm, damp wash cloth and cleaned me up. When he was done, he offered me his hand and helped me to my feet.
“I’ll fuck that greedy pussy of yours in the bed after dinner if it’s not too late.”
“If you don’t mind leftovers, dinner’ll be quick.”
“Foxy? Don’t mind whatever gets me you in that bed before you pass out.”
My god, I liked him .
I threw my arms around his shoulders, pulling him toward me for a kiss. He indulged me for only a couple seconds, then smacked the side of my still-naked ass. I squeaked in response, and I could feel his lips stretch into a smile against mine.
“After dinner, babe.”
“Right,” I said on a laugh.
Pulling away from him, I quickly gathered my scrubs, panties, and socks from the floor and hurried for my bedroom. I tossed what was in my arms into my hamper, then wrapped myself in my robe. On my trip to the kitchen, I found Kade was already there, pulling a beer from the fridge.
“You want one?” he asked from over his shoulder.
“No, thanks.”
I grazed my fingertips across his still naked back then reached around him for the leftover chicken and rice dish I’d thrown together the previous night. Five minutes later, we were sitting together at my kitchen table, refueling.
I was a couple bites in when I asked, “Can I tell you something without worrying you’ll go acting on it before I’m ready?”
He paused, his fork halfway to his mouth as he brought his eyes to meet mine.
“Depends.”
It wasn’t exactly a straight answer, but I supposed I hadn’t been very clear, either. With the intent to fill in a few more blanks, I explained, “I haven’t been able to talk to anyone about it, and I just—”
“Babe, spit it out,” he demanded.
I drew in a deep breath then freed it in a huff, setting aside my fork before I told him, “Remember that new doctor I told you about a while back? I think he might be abusing one of our nurses. I mean, I don’t have proof or anything. Not yet, anyway. I’ve tried talking to her about it, but she told me to leave it alone. The thing is, telling me to leave it alone is not the same as telling me I’m wrong.”
He finished chewing then asked, “Do you want a couple brothers and me to have a chat with this doc?”
“No. I wouldn’t ask you to do that.”
He quirked an eyebrow at me. “You didn’t ask. I’m offerin’.”
“I—I only suspect , is all. I’m trying to get to the bottom of it myself. I’m a little worried he’s done this at other hospitals. I’ve been thinking maybe I should confide in one of the other ER doctors. She told me she looked into him right after he started, and maybe she could help me do some real digging at the other places he’s worked. I don’t know, though. It’s one hell of an accusation.”
“Any man who abuses a woman deserves a taste of his own medicine, foxy. You think this guy’s shit, don’t sit on it. More than happy to help.”
I nodded, knowing exactly what a taste of his own medicine could look like. I’d seen it. Twice.
“I hear you, but I’m not ready to take it that far. I just wanted to talk to someone about it. I’m worried about Abbie. The nurse. She hasn’t been herself lately.”
“You trust this other doc?”
“I do. We’ve worked together a long time.”
Shifting his attention down to his plate, he filled his fork with another bite and said, “Talk to her. Keep me posted. You find out somethin’ you don’t like, my offer doesn’t expire.”
I fought a smile, not quite sure it was appropriate given our topic of conversation, but pleased he cared enough to listen and offer his help. He didn’t even know Abbie, and he was ready to dole out justice on her behalf.
“Thanks, honey.”
He grunted his response, then jerked his chin at my plate.
Speaking around his mouthful of food, he mumbled, “Eat, babe.”
I thought ahead to what we had planned for dessert, then picked up my fork and did just that.
The next morning, as my shift was starting, I spotted Heather as she was making her way out of the break room. I knew that moment was my best chance to catch her alone, so I hurried over and asked if she had a minute to talk.
“Sure. What’s up?”
I glanced over my shoulder to make sure we were mostly alone. Once I was satisfied, I spoke in a hushed voice, “It’s about Dr. Grant.”
Heather’s eyes sharpened as she nodded, prompting me to continue.
“I think something’s off about him,” I said, treading lightly. “I’m—I’m worried something happened between him and Abbie.”
“So, I’m not the only one to have noticed.”
A huge sigh of relief passed through my lips before I replied, “No. You’re not.”
She leaned in a little closer to me and confided, “I’ve been trying to make some calls to figure out why his tenure over the last five years has been so poor. I’ve spoken with a handful of doctors he’s worked with, but none of them have revealed anything valuable. If I had to guess, they’re either ignorant of his questionable behavior or happy to have washed their hands of him.”
“Have you tried speaking to any nurses?”
“Not yet. It’s taken me weeks to find the time to get in touch with his previous peers at two of the four hospitals. I’ve been doing it alone. Would you be interested in helping out?”
I didn’t even have to think about it.
“I’m in.”
Heather smiled appreciatively as she reached over and gave my arm a quick squeeze. “I’m so glad you came to me about this.”
“I’ve been wanting to. It’s such a sensitive topic with huge implications.”
“I know what you mean. For now, we’ll keep it between us. If either of us learns of something, we’ll figure out what to do about it. And in the meantime, we’ll both keep an eye on Abbie.”
I nodded my agreement.
We had a plan, and that felt like progress.