Chapter 9
The moon loomed, casting silvery light throughout the alleyways. The rain had stopped, but I was still drenched, in both water and regret.
I stood and glanced around, hoping to avoid the gaze of any passerby. A sigh of relief escaped me when the empty street confirmed I was alone.
A part of me wanted to find the General tonight and tell him my answer, even if only to absolve myself of the guilt that now hung heavy in my limbs.
But it was too late. There’s no way I’d be warmly welcomed if I barged up to his door at this hour. Sibyl only knew what situation I would be… walking in on. A shudder ran through me. No, it would have to be first thing tomorrow morning.
I trudged towards our apartment, hoping to find Osta there. It looked just as we’d left it that morning. She was still out.
I had become accustomed to waiting over the last few days, I could handle it for a few more moments…
The tension clawing at the back of my neck said otherwise.
I kicked off my shoes before laying down the few bags of groceries I was able to rescue off the street. Eyeing them, I pursed my lips. Great . I’d also have to explain what happened to the rest of our purchases.
I hit our recycled couch with a thud, and my hand found its way into my hair, releasing it from its drenched knot.
My eyes still burned from the tears, and my knees thrummed with pain from my fall, but nothing came close to the guilt I felt for letting my pride get the best of me.
And if I was being honest, that had been going on far longer than just this week.
A key turned in the door, and Osta peeked in, searching the room with trepidation. Her eyes widened as her gaze met mine. I sat up and pulled my legs into a crossed position on the couch. Where to begin?
“Osta, can we talk? I really need to apologize to you,” I murmured, trying to keep my voice level. Her eyes softened and she threw her head back, sighing, before leaning against the creaking door frame.
“Do you know how nervous I’ve been to come home? After I stormed off, I started thinking about everything, and I felt so terrible, Fia. I shouldn’t pu–”
“Osta,” I interrupted, shaking my head. “There’s no reason for you to feel bad. I’m the one who needs to apologize… You were right. About everything.”
Her eyes flickered with surprise, and then amusement. A smile crept up her lips.
“Did you just say I was right? About everything?” She teased, finally walking over to sit on the couch.
“I know, they're novel words coming from me.” I attempted a smile, feeling heavy. There was still so much to unload.
I spent the next hour recalling the events of the evening to Osta.
She hung on my words as I told her about the group I’d nearly exploded on and my moment of revelation on the pavement.
How relief flooded me once I realized no one was around to witness what surely looked like an insane person losing their grip on reality.
It really wasn’t too far off.
“I mean, they did destroy a good portion of our paycheck. I wouldn’t have blamed you if you had shredded their minds,” she joked, playing with her hair.
I shot her a serious look, but a small laugh escaped my lips. We both leaned back into the couch as she reached over to hook her arm with mine.
I sighed. Osta always knew how to bring light to even the most dire of situations. It was one of my favorite things about her. Well, when it wasn’t being used against me.
“So… you’re really going to do it then? Take the General up on his offer?” She eyed me curiously.
“I mean, I’d rather skin myself alive than be anywhere near him, but I’m afraid I don’t have much of a choice.
It wasn’t exactly an offer, either. More of a threat…
” I trailed off. “Maybe it won’t work, and I’ll be eating my words in a few weeks, but I think I have to try.
I can’t just run away from this.” I shrugged, twisting my lips.
Osta looked down. “So, you were going to run?” she asked, her eyes taking on a glassy sheen.
“I really thought it was the best option… but don’t worry. I’m not going anywhere. I guess if it all goes badly, you could visit me in prison.”
She nudged me. “You’re not going to end up in prison. I think you’re really going to do it. Learn how to control this.”
I wished I could share in her optimism, but I was built differently. Conditioned to assume the worst.
“I’m proud of you, you know,” she murmured. “And I’ll always be here for you. Anything you need.”
She always was. I gripped her arm tighter and nodded.
“Even if we have to make the General’s portrait into our new dart board, I’m along for the ride,” Osta promised .
We both laughed. It was nice spending a few normal minutes together. I wondered how many more of them we would have.
I took a shaky step onto the cobblestone path, eyeing the card that General Ashford had left behind. I knew the street, everyone did. It was where the Sídhe Guard held residence in Luminaria.
But just because I knew the location did not mean I’d ever ventured anywhere near it. In fact, avoiding it was one of my favorite pastimes.
Now I was headed there willingly. Hesitant, but willingly.
I was trying to take a page out of Osta’s book and look on the bright side.
After all, it wasn’t every day you got to sell your soul to the very institution that destroyed your homeland, killed your parents, and branded you a child of the Rebellion.
My jaw twisted.
I was still working on it.
As I trudged through the busy streets, my dream from last night slipped into my thoughts. It was another odd sequence of events–not horrific or traumatizing, just strange.
I was moving quickly through dense fog. Twisted vines snaked across the muddy earth. They disappeared behind me as I floated through the void.
Two glowing golden eyes finally met my gaze, obscured by the mist. They stayed locked on me before disappearing again into the darkness. I tried to follow them, but they were too fast.
And then I woke up.
Either my subconscious was taking it easy on me, or it had run out of material.
I neared the familiar edge of the Western district, heart fluttering as I turned down a street I had never set foot on. I let my gaze wander up. The architecture looked similar enough to the rest of Luminaria–vines cascading over stone buildings, moss spattering the cobblestone.
But as I focused on the view ahead, everything became more structured, more orderly.
Nature faded out, revealing the enormous assortment of towers that made up the Sídhe Guard Compound.
The streets were crawling with armored and uniformed soldiers milling about and talking amongst themselves.
The sheer amount of emerald-encrusted serpents was nauseating.
I tucked my head down and quickened my pace.
For Esprithe sake.
My strides became less confident as I neared the looming monstrosity of the Compound.
The encroaching structures were carved into dark stone, and gilded edges adorned the exterior.
The Sídhe Guard insignia was sprawled across the front in roaring shades of gold.
The General’s card stated that I should take the exterior entrance, the one that would bring me directly to his office.
I glanced down the street that lined the eastern side, identifying the giant staircase indicated in his directions.
Begrudgingly, I made my way to the ramp, careful not to bring too much attention to myself.
The idea of being here was turning my stomach in knots.
The metal stairs absorbed my steps, leaving me in an eerie silence. I put one foot in front of the other, trying to shut my brain off. If I thought too hard about what I was about to do, I might turn around.
As I climbed to the second level, I found an iron door. General Laryk Ashford was etched into the front with gilded lettering.
Taking a deep breath, I shook off the nerves that had grown increasingly noticeable throughout the journey here. Before I could change my mind, I reached out and slung the heavy door knocker three times. There was no backing out now.
I waited. And waited. Maybe he wasn’t even here today. It was the weekend after all …
I had just put myself through the misery of this trek for nothing. Annoyance flooded me as I turned around.
Then I heard what sounded like shuffling inside, followed by a woman’s laughter. Almost immediately after, the door opened with a metallic screech. Out stepped General Laryk Ashford in all his pompous glory.
His copper hair was untamed, cascading down his chest and catching in the breeze. A disheveled black shirt laid open, revealing the chiseled contours of his abdomen. His trousers looked haphazardly buttoned. My eyes drifted down…
Dear Conleth . What had I interrupted? I might as well have come by last night.
A flush of shame spread across my face.
His emerald gaze locked on me. He didn’t even try to hide the smirk forming on his lips.
He leaned back against the doorframe and crossed his arms, cocking his head to the side in what I assumed was supposed to resemble feigned shock.
“You've arrived sooner than expected, and on a weekend, no less. I trust there hasn't been another incident.” The General looked towards the street, aloof. “I assume you’re here to accept my proposition,” he murmured. “It’s a wise choice.”
This was shaping up to be even more difficult than I had anticipated. I released a heavy sigh, mentally urging myself to stick to my promise to Osta and remain amiable. I tried to summon a kind smile, though it likely came across as a grimace.
“I see we haven’t yet lost the attitude. Perhaps that will be our first lesson.” He sighed, irritation creeping into his voice.
“Good luck.” My eyes widened. I hadn't meant to say that out loud.
“Yes. That’s going to be a problem.”