Chapter Twenty
Circle of Trust
Ariana
Present
“You made it!”
Grace wrapped me in a fierce hug before welcoming me inside, taking the batch of cookies I’d made from my hands as soon as I was in the door.
“And you brought cookies?!” Grace beamed before turning to yell down the hall. “Ariana brought cookies!”
There was a cheer of joy from where I assumed the rest of the girls were gathered, and I smiled, my cheeks flushing with heat.
I was so nervous I wanted to puke.
I hadn’t had girlfriends in so long, I couldn’t remember what it was like to have a girls’ night. The last time I’d had anything even remotely similar was when I was thirty.
Almost a decade ago now.
But after I moved in with Nathan, I found myself going out with my friends less and less. I was obsessed with Nathan, for one, and fully in love with falling in love. I wanted him to take up all my time. I craved it.
When the honeymoon phase settled, I realized it had been a long time since I’d seen a lot of my friends outside of work or a group gathering.
And when I did get brave enough to make plans with them, Nathan would lament my leaving, making a big show of wrapping me up and begging me not to go in a playful, teasing manner.
It always ended with us making love before I’d go, and then I was ready to hurry back home to him.
Eventually… I just stopped leaving.
And then when I did want to, it was no longer a playful show of him not wanting me to leave — it was a threatening one.
It was him suspicious of me going to a bar without him, asking me how I would feel if he did the same?
He twisted innocent nights into me not wanting to spend time with him.
He used the fact that he was busy against me, like I should want to spend any time he had at home together.
How could I want any more alone time when he was already gone so much?
So, yeah… friends had rightfully given up on me. Who wanted to keep inviting the person who never came, who never invited you anywhere?
My topsy-turvy stomach situation wasn’t helped any by the fact that I’d been a wreck the last week since I’d spent a day with Shane.
I’d felt so guilty that night when I went home, taking a long hot shower as if I could scrub the impure thoughts from my head.
I’d tucked the wooden page holder away between books I knew Nathan would never touch, and I lit the candle I’d bought, burning it down to the wick before throwing it in the trash and taking the trash out to the garbage can outside just in case.
When Nathan came home the next day, I swore he’d see right through it, like I was standing there at a crime scene red-handed.
But he didn’t notice a thing.
In fact, he’d been more preoccupied than ever since he returned from his trip. He hadn’t even batted an eye when I’d reminded him of craft night tonight. He’d kissed my forehead before he left for work and told me he’d be out late anyway and to have fun.
I knew he was busy with his new team and staff, but it was rare for him to leave me alone so much.
Not that I was complaining.
It was a nice break. I didn’t mind at all that I could spend my days working on Sweet Dreams and my evenings working on the house.
I loved when Nathan texted me that he wouldn’t be home for dinner, and I could order in or make a bowl of pasta and rot on the couch watching Bravo.
I especially loved the nights he was so late that I was fast asleep by the time he made it home.
My gut churned again at that.
What kind of wife would wish to never see her husband?
I tried not to let myself dwell on it too much as I followed Grace inside.
I didn’t need to think about Nathan tonight.
I didn’t need to think about Shane, either — whom I’d insisted leave me to deal Sweet Dreams on my own unless I specifically needed help with players.
The last thing I needed was time alone with him in close proximity.
One day had proven how dangerous that could be.
It was strange, how quickly my emotions had warped after that day. I’d left angry and sad, storming home with smoke fuming from my nose. But even that night, my anger had subsided, leaving only sadness in its wake. And by the next day, I found I just…
I just missed him.
I missed the Shane I spent nearly two years of my life with at a time when I felt like possibility was endless.
I thought the worst of my life was behind me and I had nothing but brighter days ahead.
I’d lost myself in that boy and the promises he made so easily, because I trusted him. I never had a reason not to.
Until the day he showed me how fair-weather love can be.
I shook my head, determined to let it go. No thoughts of Nathan or Shane allowed.
No, tonight was about making friends. It was about building community in my new home. It was about me.
That was probably why I felt so uncomfortable.
It had been so long since I’d done anything for myself that I felt guilty for even considering it.
“Welcome to Craft Night Chaos!” Grace said when we made it to Maven’s living room.
I was stunned enough to stop walking, my lips parting as I took in the gorgeous space.
The sliding glass doors along the back of the room led out to a private beach on the Gulf, which was currently showcasing a stunning sunset.
Pinks and purples darted across the sky, the sound of the waves crashing just barely audible over the soft music playing on the speaker.
Sitting at the dining table near the kitchen was Maven, along with two women I didn’t recognize.
And one who had me even more shell-shocked than the beach view.
“Is that…”
I pointed at the pop star, who looked deceivingly normal at the moment with a messy bun of hair piled on her head and an oversized t-shirt.
Her tan legs were folded beneath her, and she was painting ghosts onto what appeared to be an old, vintage painting of a farmhouse, her tongue out as she focused.
She sat back with an appreciative smile at her work before her eyes met mine.
“Oh, yeah, I forget that she’s kinda famous,” Grace said, waving her hand at her friend like she was just an everyday person. “But yes, that is the one and only Mia Love.”
“You say that so casually like you didn’t fangirl so hard you nearly passed out the first time you met her,” one of the women at the table quipped with an arched brow.
She was working on a delicate necklace, it looked like, her earthy-brown hands meticulously threading beads onto a chain.
She had gorgeous black hair that framed her face in a flowy blowout, her makeup flawlessly applied like she was set to hit the runway rather than hang out at a friend’s house.
“Hi, I’m Livia,” she said to me, her smile warm.
“And I’m Chloe,” the last of the unknown said, and the curvy little redhead popped right out of her seat and skipped over to me, crushing me in a hug. She had metallic pink eye masks under her eyes and brought a set for me, too. “I have heard so much about you. Welcome to girls’ night.”
“Thank you,” I managed, smiling despite the way my neck felt like it could fry an egg.
“So, you already know Maven and my connections to the team,” Grace said, placing my cookies at the center of the craft table before she invited me to sit.
She immediately plucked one off the platter and took a huge bite, moaning with approval before she continued around a mouthful.
“Livia here is Maven’s bestie and is now engaged to Carter Fabri. ”
“She had his baby first, though. Scandalous,” Maven teased.
Livia threw a bead at her.
“And then Chloe here somehow softened our very own Daddy P into the mush ball he is today.”
“Is that how you’d describe him?” I asked, folding my hands tightly in my lap. I hadn’t thought to bring anything with me to craft night.
Idiot.
“Because I’m pretty sure I’ve seen him smile a total of two times.”
“He was even more of a grump before Chloe here, if you can imagine that,” Grace said.
Chloe beamed, pressing her fingertips into the eye masks above her cheeks. “It’s true. You should have seen the man at Disney World. You would have thought we’d dragged him to prison rather than the most magical place on Earth.”
“And this one,” Grace said, nudging Mia Fucking Love — I still wasn’t over that. “She actually grew up with Aleks Suter. And they started dating out of nowhere and had, like, the fastest engagement of all time.”
I remembered, though I wouldn’t dare say a word about it here. I’d followed their whole relationship, fawning over the photos the paparazzi leaked. I especially lost my mind over the one of them kissing on the beach.
“It was so romantic,” Chloe swooned. “I’ll never forget that speech he gave on the yacht when he proposed.”
“So… I actually have a confession,” Mia said, looking around the table with her lip between her teeth. She dropped her gaze back to her painting when she said, “What if I told you we were actually kind of faking it…”
Grace laughed. “Oh sure, so fake.” She rolled her eyes, but then her smile fell when Mia didn’t give in. “Wait. You mean to tell me it was all a publicity stunt?”
“I mean… kinda?” Mia winced. “Until it wasn’t. Obviously.”
“I knew it!” Livia snapped her fingers, pointing across the table at her literal popstar friend. “I overheard your publicist talking to Suter’s agent at your album release party in California, something about getting the money shot.”
“But you two are so in love!” Chloe whined.
“We are. And we were then, too. We were just also both really stupid and thought it was fun to torture ourselves thinking the other was just pretending to like us for a few months.” Mia shrugged. “Sounds crazy, but it was actually kind of fun.”
“You’re all crazy,” Maven said, looking around the table. “And that’s exactly why I love you so much.”
I smiled, looking down at the empty table in front of me. I decided to put on the eye mask Chloe had given me just so I had something to do with my hands.