CHAPTER 16 #2
“Just my legs. I need to move around,” I sighed as I placed a hand on Deacon’s forearm and tried to maintain my balance. “Stupid injury. I walk and push too far and I get pain. I sit and don’t move at all and I get fucking pain too. I guess there’s no winning for me.”
“D you want some pain meds?” Deak offered as he wrapped his arm around my back so I could lean into him more, which helped.
“No. It’s not that bad. Can you just walk me to my room? I’m stiff and off balance,” I admitted.
“I’ve got you,” he told me with a smile that eased my embarrassment a little, but I still hated how much help I knew I needed.
I had been independent for as long as I could remember.
My mom had worked countless jobs to try and keep a roof over our heads when she was able, and when she wasn’t depression would keep her hidden away in her bed for days and sometimes weeks at a time, so I basically brought myself up.
Then she died, and Colt stepped up. He tried hard to take care of me, and over time I learned I could rely on him and gave in some, but ultimately I remained independent.
Then that monster tried to destroy me, and maybe he did in some ways.
That was why for the last decade I had fought like hell not to rely on or fully trust anyone but myself and Colt.
I had been stubborn and snarky, keeping everyone out of my way and my life as much as possible.
Even my police family who I worked with every damned day for a huge part of that time, had never had my full trust. I kept them out of my private life completely and I never asked for help from any of them, no matter how tough things got.
For the last two years, ever since I was shot I had known I could no longer do everything alone.
The bad days were simply too much of a struggle to manage alone, but still I had refused to give in, to my own massive detriment.
I could have called Colt and told him everything, knowing he’s have been there for me instantly, but I hadn’t.
I hadn’t reached out to anyone because I was ashamed.
Now these guys were making me give in and ask for the help I needed, but it didn’t ease the embarrassment I felt, and the terrifying knowledge inside of me that I was weak.
I never wanted to be that way, but this time I wasn’t sure there was much I could do to overcome it.
And there goes another part of myself that’s been ripped away, I thought broken heartedly.
I honestly wasn’t sure there was very much of who I once was left at all at that point.
“Ava?” Kylan answered before the first ring had even finished.
“It’s not bad news,” I told him instantly, knowing what he feared most – me calling to tell him Volt was dead.
“Oh God. I’m sorry….I just…. I need him back. I really love him. As soon as my call rings my heart beats out of my chest,” I could hear tears in his words and his voice was trembling. Sorry. I should shut up,” he added with a sniffle.
“You don’t need to shut up. I know exactly how you feel, Ky. I need him back too, more than I can say, but I do have some thing positive to tell you this time.”
“Tell me.”
“I searched through surveillance footage at Temple around the time Colt disappeared and I found the fucker who has him. He doesn’t show his face, but Mason is getting more footage from building surrounding the club and we’re hoping we’ll get an image of the guys car,” I explained.
“How did you know it’s him?” Ky asked. I hadn’t told him how we knew who had Colt and had killed Helen. I hadn’t wanted to tell him. He was a virtual stranger to me, and telling Jack, Mace, and Deacon had been hard enough.
“Did Colt ever tell you why I moved to Chicago?”
“He told me something happened, but he wouldn’t give me details. He said he made a promise to you and I respected that,” Ky explained, and tears instantly filled my eyes at knowing Colt had kept my secret, even from a man he was very obviously deeply in love with.
“I was attacked,” I admitted with a sniffle. “I was grabbed close to Temple and knocked out. When I woke up I was…ch-chained up to the ceiling. The man who took me was some kind of religious nut. He thought I was a sinner and told me I had to atone. He…fuck.” I paused and took a deep breath.
“It was him, wasn’t it? The man who took you, killed Helen. I know she was branded with he word ‘sinner’ and tortured. I saw the news reports.”
“Yeah,” I whispered. “It was him. I managed to escape and call Colt. He came for me, but I was so ashamed. I made him promise not to call the cops or tell a soul what happened. Now that monster has Colt and it’s all my fucking fault!”
“No. Don’t do that. Colt would never allow you to blame yourself and I won’t either. Whatever had happened is all because of that monster who hurt you and took Colt. Any blame lies squarely at his feet. He’s a sick bastard.”
“Yeah, he is,” I agreed.
“Have you been getting enough rest? I know how important it is to find Colt. Believe me it’s all I want, but you have to look after yourself too.”
“I’m fine, Kylan. Please don’t worry about me. I’m a fuck ton stronger than I look,” I assured him. “How about you? Are you sleeping?”
“Not really. I’ve just been trying to throw myself into the restaurants, but I can barely think straight. Are you sure there isn’t anything I can do to help the search for him? I need to do something!” he insisted.
“Maybe you could look at the footage I found. The guy never shows his face, but he’s still distinctive. I doubt he ever made himself known to Colt, but it’s worth you looking in case you recognize him.”
“Yes! Anything. I’ll do anything I can. If you need resources or to hire a private investigator, anything like that, come to me. I have restaurants across the country and money isn’t an issue. I’d give everything I have it would bring Colt home.”
“I appreciate that, but we’re good. Mason and I are working the investigation and Jack knows a guy who can get us any info we need online. Why don’t you come over here? You can look at the footage I have and meet the guys too,” I suggested.
“Yes, of course. Send me the address and I’ll be right there. Thank you Ava, for keeping me in the loop. I know Colt never talked about me, but we really are in love. He means everything to me.”
“I know,” I assured him. And I did know.
I could feel how much Colt meant to Kylan in just the few short interactions we had.
I was just so annoyed with my brother for not trusting me with the truth.
How could he ever think I’d think less of him.
Or even care that he loved a man instead of a woman.
It made no odds to me, and I hated that he’d had that doubt.
***
Kylan arrived just as Jack was laying out the lasagna he had made for dinner on the dining table, along with salad and garlic bread he’s made from scratch. Jack had already let him into the building when the buzzer sounded, so now he was knocking on the door of the apartment.
“Guys!” I barked when I saw he and Mason looking to each other with question.
They weren’t happy when I told them Ky was coming over, the both of them cautious about us allowing any stranger close – especially to me – with everything that was going on.
They’d only relented because Deacon had assured him the guy was no threat to me when they were all with me.
And he was right. While Kylan was handsome and model worthy with his trim, toned body, he was nowhere near as built, muscled, or aggressive and I knew Jack and Mason could become when required.
Hell, I was pretty sure I could take Kylan down with my martial arts skills if it came to it, not that I had any fear he truly was a threat.
His devastation as Colt being gone was real and soul destroying to witness.
Finally Jack relented first and moved to open the apartment door as Mason moved closer to me, placing himself between me and the entrance.
“You must be Kylan,” Jack greeted. Not the friendliest, but it wasn’t a growl or a threat at least.
“I am, and I’m guessing you’re Jack. You manage Temple, right?”
“I do. Come in. This is Mason,” Jack said as they both walked inside and Jack indicated where Mason stood looking seriously menacing.
“Right, yeah,” Kylan stuttered as he seemed to wilt before Mason nervously, and who could blame him?
“Quit it, asshole!” I snapped as I stood and slapped Mason on the back hard. I rounded his immoveable frame and smiled at Kylan as I approached him. “Ignore him. He’s being insane and over the top. Thanks for coming,” I said as I took his hand in mine and gave it a reassuring squeeze.
“I’m glad to be here. I know I can’t do much, but at least I can feel like I’m helping,” he sighed.
He looked exhausted. His hair was wild and clearly hadn’t been styled in days.
He was wearing navy sweats, a worn pair of sneakers and hoody that was too big on him.
I was pretty sure the hoody was Colt’s, as it looked familiar from the last time I saw my brother in Chicago, almost two and a half years ago.
Ky was pale and his eyes were red and swollen as he released my hand and nervously crossed his arms over his chest, his car keys still in his hand.
“Come and meet Deacon. He may look intimidating, but he’s way less of an asshole that the other two,” I told him as I pulled him to where Deacon stood in the kitchen. He’d been getting water for with dinner, but had pause and was just watching us.
“We met briefly at my restaurant. Colt has mentioned you often,” he added as he looked to Deacon, who stood a good five inches taller than Ky. “You attend his poker nights at the apartment I believe.”
“That’s me. I’m sure Colt loves telling you how he robs me blind every time we play,” Deak chuckled as he gave Ky a friendly smile.
“He is a bit of a cheat. Last time we went away together we ended up playing gin rummy and I know he was cheating,” Ky laughed.