58. Chapter 58
CHAPTER 58
Lucenna
I t was hardly midday, and Lucenna was already restless. She shifted on the velvet green bench that did little in the ways of comfort. After being cooped up in the carriage for three days, she would rather ride a horse than spend another moment inside.
Lucenna hardly listened to Aerina’s story as she recounted how she and Lord Norrlen fell in love. She was busy watching Dyna.
Her distant cousin had been silent all morning. She stared blankly at the hills coated in fog outside. Shadows lined her exhausted eyes, her complexion pale. Dyna’s Essence also seemed dim. Lucenna reminded herself to brew Azeran’s tea whenever they stopped.
Keena giggled with a trilling sound, drawing Lucenna from her thoughts. The fairy’s wings released a puff of golden pixie dust as she flew around the carriage. “My, Lord Norrlen sure knew how to woo a lady.”
Lucenna smirked. “He does bear a certain charm about him.”
“Do you have a beloved, Lady Lucenna?” Aerina asked her. “I see you have a lovely ring.”
“Oh, uh, well—” Lucenna stuttered, caught off guard by the question. She glanced down at the pink diamond sitting on her finger. It once shone brightly, but somehow appeared dull to her now. “I suppose you could say I am promised.”
The statement came out half-heartedly. She didn’t know what to call Everest. Beloved? Love-mate? None seemed to fit.
“She is to marry the Crown Prince of the Magos Empire,” Kenna announced cheerfully.
Lucenna shot the fairy a withering look.
Keena winced. “Oh … forgive me. Was it a secret?”
Crossing her arms, Lucenna slumped back in her seat. “I suppose not.”
Though she didn’t think sharing her story with Keena last night meant it would be shared with others.
“I see.” Lady Aerina’s brows rose high with interest but courteously didn’t press her further. She asked Keena, “Are you promised as well, princess?”
The little fairy’s hazel eyes widened, and she shook her head, making the gold beads in her dark hair jingle. “Oh no. I am not fond of such entanglements.”
“Have you ever been in love?”
“I am not sure I would recognize the feeling. Love is different for faeries. From what I have seen, I find it more trouble than it’s worth. Though it is quite amusing to watch,” Keena added with a with a trilling laugh. The petals of her dress fluttered as she flew over to sit on Lucenna’s shoulder.
“I suppose it can be trouble,” Aerina said with a sigh. “You find yourself on this precipice where everything begins and ends with this person. Suddenly every thought of them has taken over your life and there is this incredible feeling inside of you. Passion and desire are only a facet in the deep well of affection that exists for them. When they are gone, it feels as if one cannot breathe…”
Lucenna watched Dyna carefully for her reaction to the turn of conversation but she hardly blinked, clearly not listening at all. In truth, Lucenna wasn’t sure if she could understand love either. What she had felt for Everest didn’t seem to match that description.
Affection yes, but passion and desire?
Lucenna had shared his bed once, and while an enjoyable experience, she realized now it was done only to please him rather than herself. Her young, impressionable heart had convinced her it was love. Would she even know what true love felt like?
Movement passing the carriage window drew her attention to it as Klyde rode past with Tavin.
“The time Rawn and I had together was very brief,” Lady Aerina said, pulling her back to the conversation. “But each day had been so wonderful.”
“Even when your marriage became too difficult to bear?” Dyna suddenly asked, looking up at her. “Lord Norrlen is a soldier. Who most would consider a step above a commoner. You, Your Grace, are a Princess of Greenwood. Your statuses were so far apart, you may as well be from two different worlds. Was it worth all the pain and backlash you suffered for loving him? For the disrespect and danger you still endure to remain his wife?”
Lucenna and Keena exchanged a glance. She may have had the same thoughts, but to voice them aloud…
Lady Aerina did not look offended, though. She smiled at Dyna, though it was a sad one. “When I married Rawn, I chose to bind myself to him completely. I saw my marriage as not a promise for love so long as our life is perfect. But a promise to love him through every trial for he is the one I chose to face this life with.” Lady Aerina looked down at the emerald ring on her finger. “They say the God of Urn tied each soul to their soulmate with a thread. This thread is to represent the bond between two people. It may stretch and tangle, but it will never break. Even if you are separated by distance, time, or obstacles, they will eventually find each other and fulfill their destined love. It is often used to convey the belief that true love is predestined, and that fate plays a role in bringing soulmates together…” Her voice wobbled and her eyes grew wet. “And if I am not meant to be reunited with Rawn in this life, I fully believe I will see him again in the next one … because he is mine.”
“Oh, you poor thing.” Kenna flew to her and patted her cheek.
Dyna heaved a breath and rubbed her face. “I am so sorry for my thoughtless question. I did not mean to imply…”
“No, no, it’s all right.” Aerina laughed lightly and drew out a handkerchief from her dress to wipe her eyes. “I am quite emotional as of late. Please forgive me for these endless bouts of tears.”
“You need not hold up any appearances with us,” Lucenna said, taking her hand. “You miss your husband and you’re worried about him. You’re allowed to cry.”
Aerina’s eyes welled with fresh tears. “Thank you, but I…I must behave as a princess should. Each day is a burden knowing what he must suffer now and I cannot even cry. I cling to the hope that my Rawn will make it home.” Her hand went to her chest. “I dread the moment I no longer feel him.”
They had a connection, Lucenna recalled. She had seen it on the Essencia Dimensio when helping Rawn with his tracking spell. Elves may not have bonds like Celestials, but they had their own form of a magical link, if only an awareness of their mate.
“I made Rawn a promise that he would see his family again.” Dyna took Aerina’s other hand. “I assure you. Nothing will make me break my word.”
The tears gathering on Aerina’s lashes spilled over like drops of dew. She must have been containing all her worry and fear. They sat with her as she silently cried, watching the land roll by.
The carriage eventually lurched to a stop in the early evening. Horses knickered and voices called to each other.
A rap knocked against the ceiling. “We have arrived, Your Grace.”
“Oh, yes.” Lady Aerina straightened up excitedly, all smiles again, though her pale skin couldn’t mask the redness around her eyes. “We are here.”
“Where?” Keena flew to the windows.
“We have reached the Melodyam Falls. This is my favorite place.” She giggled, a pink blush coloring her complexion. “It’s where Raiden was conceived.”
Dear gods, Lucenna did not need to be privy to that information.
Raiden, having opened the door for them at that exact moment turned bright red. He groaned at the sky. “Mother, please.”
“There is nothing to be ashamed of, dear.”
Raiden returned her smile, though his was sarcastically polite. “Yes, well, I would rather you not discuss the private matter of my conception with our guests.” He glowered exasperatingly at Dyna. Lucenna was relieved to see her crack a smile.
Aerina accepted her son’s waiting hand and stepped out of the carriage. “You should be proud,” she told him. “Your conception is what led to the discovery of these sacred waters.”
“Sacred waters?” Dyna repeated as the rest of them stepped outside.
At first, they only saw the forest and the cliffside south of the game trail. But they followed Aerina round the carriage and Lucenna’s jaw dropped in awe. They had arrived outside a set of ruins carved into the side of a foothill. It held many stone bridges and abandoned structures covered in moss and vines. It overlooked a beautiful arrangement of three cascades that fell into a crystalline pool. The crash of the water echoed through the empty ruins, making it seem as if the halls were singing.
But what Lucenna found most peculiar was the water itself.
From where she stood, it looked pink.
Red petals floated on the surface of the pool. Dynalyas grew everywhere. On the rocky cliffs, the water’s edge, and on the small island in the center of pool grew a large bushel of them. So tall, it may as well be a tree.
“The dynalya flower symbolizes love, yearning, and devotion,” Lady Aerina said. “We elves believe the beauty of its petals reflect the spirit of a woman. What is more, they are also a source of healing. Somehow, its magic has transferred to the waters here.”
As she spoke, Cassiel landed not too far from them. His gaze was already on Dyna, which she pointedly ignored. Klyde called him over to help with the unloading of the horses as the guards set up camp.
“That sounds fascinating,” Dyna said.
“I will tell you a secret,” Aerina whispered to her. “Long ago, the royal bloodline of Greenwood had been cursed.” Her hand came to rest on her flat stomach as she gazed at the cascades. “A King cursed a King to bear only barren children, so one day his line would end. My father’s line. He did not believe it, until my brother’s wife could not bear sons. Then I, too, became sterile. It was a secret well-kept for fear my brother would lose the throne. Until one day, Rawn brought me here, then there was you.” She smiled up at her son. “You do not understand what that means.”
Raiden rolled his eyes. “Mother, I have a rather undesirable understanding of what that means. I think you, however, do not understand what hearing this story an insufferable number of times does to me.”
Lady Aerina gave her son a look that Lucenna could only describe as fond. She patted his cheek. “Come, I must stretch my legs. Would you like to see the ruins, Lady Dyna?”
“Oh, yes, I would be glad to.”
Raiden held out his arm to her. “I will escort you, if only to impede anymore embarrassing tales oh my behalf.”
Dyna laughed, walking off with the young elvish lord.
“Princess, please be careful,” Camsen said as he and Eldred followed. “We are below the base of the mountain, and far too close to River Myst.”
Cassiel watched them go, his gaze on Dyna.
“I can see his mind working to figure out how to gain her trust and forgiveness again,” Princess Keena whispered to Lucenna. “I can’t help but feel sorry for him. The pain and love in his eyes, it’s almost?—”
“Pathetic,” Lucenna retorted under her breath.
Cassiel had always been skilled at maintaining pretenses, but he couldn’t quite hide the misery on his face when it came to her.
Lucenna strode over to Cassiel and blocked his view. “You did it to yourself.”
He only blinked at her idly. “I did.”
She scowled. Being mean to him wasn’t fun if he agreed.
Then Lucenna noticed the large tear on his shoulder where the Other had nearly taken his arm. Dried blood still stained the dark fabric. “Why haven’t you changed yet?” Looking at him more closely, his face as gaunt and his eyes were shadowed. “Have you even slept?”
“No…” Cassiel answered dismissively, glancing past her to Dyna again.
“Have you eaten?”
“I will later.”
“What is wrong with you?” she snapped. “You worked yourself to exhaustion when the Shades came, then you put yourself in harm’s way with the Other. It was reckless.”
Lucenna had always known him to be the cautious sort. But yesterday he could have died.
Cassiel blinked at her at outburst. “There wasn’t much of a choice when people stood to be killed. My power better served in that situation.”
“Perhaps you think yourself invincible now, Celestial, but you are not immortal. Your actions fall on Dyna, and that includes your lack of self-care.” Magic crackled around her hands. “I won’t have you disrupting her sleep any longer.”
His brow furrowed with confusion. Dyna had not slept either and was hardly eating. It was clear why.
“I can feel how tired she is…” Cassiel looked back at where she was. “And her magic is weak. Why?”
“How do you think you survived when you passed out during your fight with the Shades?”
A look of shock crossed his face. Of course Dyna had not told him. She had told all of them not to mention that she had in turn saved his life. But Lucenna was too worried.
“She can’t sleep.”
“What do you mean?”
“She’s having nightmares, Cassiel. They started after you left and became worse when you returned. The bond may be shattered but you are still connected, therefore rest, so perhaps she can.” Lucenna jabbed a finger towards the cook’s tent. “Now go eat something.”
Cassiel stared at her mutely. Then he walked off without a word.
“Was that your way of saying you’re worried about him, too?” Klyde asked with a chuckle. He was a few steps away, building a tent while Tavin gathered firewood.
“She is ice cold on the outside, but soft as dough on the inside,” Keena teased.
Lucenna ignored them. “Where is Zev?”
“He’s keeping to the woods,” Klyde said
That was probably for the best, though she hated to admit it. Lucenna searched the trees for any streaks of black. Zev needed to eat too.
In the morning, Dyna had healed him before he vanished into the forest. To follow the convoy at a distance.
“I heard the elves whispering about him,” Keena said worriedly. “They called him a demon.”
“I am.” They all turned at the rumble of Zev’s voice.
Lucenna spotted his glowing yellow eyes first. He was a large shadow in the dim brush of the forest, wearing only his trousers. A sheen of sweat coated his chest, his dark hair windblown. He looked exhausted but much better than he usually did after a full moon.
“Zev, how are you feeling?” Lucenna went to him. She handed him a waterskin and he tilted his head back as he drank it to dregs. Up close, it was clear he had not suffered any new scars since he had spent the night without his silver chains.
“Better,” Zev said, wiping his mouth with the back of his arm. He fleetingly glanced at the camp.
“Von is fine and no one else was hurt,” she assured him. “Dyna and Cassiel stopped you in time.”
The mention of Cassiel seemed to stump him. Zev nodded curtly and turned to go.
“You won’t stay, mate?” Klyde called out from behind her.
“It’s best I don’t. I’ll keep to the trees.”
“Have a meal with us at least,” she said.
“Plenty to hunt in the forest. Will you let Dyna know I came by?”
“Of course.”
He ambled away.
“Zev…” Lucenna called, and he paused, glancing at her over his shoulder. “You’re not a demon.”
He smirked faintly, though it was resigned. “Our origins began with the bite of a warg. What else could I be but a demon?”
That little tidbit tied Lucenna’s tongue. Wargs … she remembered reading about them. They were demons that had roamed the Everfrost during the First Age.
Zev walked away, fading into the trees.
Sighing, she returned to the camp spot Klyde was putting together with his nephew. With a sweep of her purple Essence, she levitated some logs around the circle of stones already containing a pile of firewood. With a snap of her fingers, she lit them aflame and took a seat.
“Intriguing.” Keena shifted to her full height in a puff of gold dust and took a seat beside her. “I heard his kind carried traces of demon in their blood, but I wasn’t sure if it was merely rumor.”
Klyde took out a sleeping mat from his pack then folded blankets. “Werewolves came into existence during the First Age. The first was once human, until he had been cursed with magic from the God of Shadows and the God of Death. It had turned him into a monstruous, bloodthirsty beast.”
Lucenna thought of the Other and shivered. “Zev isn’t like that…”
“Except for last night,” Keena stated. Lucenna shot her a glare and the fairy smiled sheepishly. “Only an thought. I’ll go about seeing if I can find us something to eat.”
She shrunk again and flew off, zipping like a yellow butterfly through the camp.
“You’re a tad short-tempered today,” Klyde said, taking Keena’s seat. “Though you’re a ray of sunshine compared to his royal highness over there.”
He motioned at where Cassiel spoke with his Valkyrie, his arms crossed and brooding.
“Then perhaps you can attempt to not be a tad exasperating today,” Lucenna retorted.
Klyde sighed.
“You’re already doing it.”
“Lass, not everyone knows Zev as we do.”
Lucenna arched a brow. “We?”
“You forget I had the privilege to know him over the winter.”
“Right, and you are an observant bloke with an opinion on everyone,” she retorted, flipping her white hair over her shoulder. “So what do you make of him?”
“I believe Zev is a good man with an unfortunate curse.”
“Do you think he’s a monster, too?”
Klyde fell quiet as he observed the dancing flames. The low sun caught his features, gilding them in a soft orange hue. “We all have a monster in us, and they take different forms. Sometimes they sleep and never wake. For others they appear once a month. Sometimes … they take over who we are.”
Lucenna studied him, wondering if he was thinking of his brother. She tried to imagine what Klyde’s monster looked like but failed in her imagination.
He caught her staring at him and grinned. “What? Are you thinking I look rather handsome in the golden hour?”
She rolled her eyes. “No. I was attempting to imagine what your monster would look like.”
He laughed, the sound low and husky. “I meant it figuratively, lass.”
“I know, but if you did turn as Zev does, I’d imagine you would look like a Skelling.”
His grin widened. “Aye? And why is that?”
The answer caught in her throat and Lucenna’s face warmed. She didn’t dare tell him because it would only encourage his ego. The world would freeze before she ever admitted that the blue of his eyes reminded her of the seas his ancestors once ruled over.
At the lack of her answer, Klyde’s gaze roamed her face. “There you go again,” he murmured. “Having me wonder what you could possibly be thinking.”
“I think you can find a better use of your time…” Lucenna murmured. They jumped at the sudden clatter of firewood dropping on the ground.
Tavin wiped his dirty hands on his shirt as he asked, “Who is that man?”
They followed his stare to Von walking away from the camp.
He had done well to leave the boy alone. Probably because Klyde looked ready to murder him if he came near. But Tavin was beginning to notice Von’s attention on him as well.
Klyde gritted his teeth. “I told you. He’s no one.”
Tavin’s pale gaze studied his uncle a long moment and Lucenna found herself holding her breath. “Then why does he look like mother?”
His mother?
Lucenna canted her head and her eyes widened when it hit her. Gods, in the right light, Von did look similar to Edyth. She stared at Klyde and his grim expression all but confirmed it.
“Stay away from him, all right?” Klyde said gruffly. “He’s dangerous, Tavin. Go on now. Leave your gear and fetch water for the horses.”
His nephew glowered. He yanked off his harness and tossed it on the ground before wordlessly storming away.
Lucenna shook her head. “You can’t lie to him forever, Klyde. He’ll eventually learn the truth. Secrets have a way of coming to light.”
A strange look crossed Klyde’s face as he watched his nephew go. “I fear what it will do... to reveal the truth.”
“I understand that. But take it from someone who was raised with secrets and lies. The truth is always better.” Lucenna looked down at her ring. “Even if they cannot accept it or hate you for it. A life of lies is not a real life.”
Klyde leaned forward with his head in his hands. She could see how much this secret weighed on him because she felt that same weight.
It was about time she told Everest everything.
What if he hated her and called off the wedding? Strangely, it didn’t bother Lucenna like she thought it would. If he cared about her then he would care about what she stood for.
Too many years had passed, and she was not the same girl who had been infatuated with a prince.
Dyna’s voice echoed in her head. Do you love him?
At the time she couldn’t answer. Whether it was love or duty, Lucenna knew she had betrayed him a long time ago. She needed to speak to Everest and set things right.
But she had to arrange it with Lucien first. Today.
Klyde lifted his head and blue eyes carried much as he looked at her. “You’re right, lass,” he said after a breath. “I need to tell the truth … but that doesn’t stop me from being afraid.”
“I know.” She was afraid too.