Chapter 9
HAYDEN
“Oh, you motherfucker.”
A smile curls at my lips at her voice as I walk out the front of the hotel.
“Everything okay?” I ask, stepping up behind Hailee and lowering my sunglasses over my eyes.
She groans in frustration, and I try to convince myself that it’s not because of my presence, but after the way she was at breakfast this morning, it’s harder than it should be.
“My Uber just cancelled. That’s the third one in a row.”
“Shit.”
“Yeah, shit. I just want to go home.”
It doesn’t escape my attention that not once has she looked me in the eye this morning. It’s annoying the shit out of me.
As far as I’m concerned, last night, or more so, this morning, wasn’t a big deal.
Okay, that’s a lie. It was a huge fucking deal. I woke up with the woman of my dreams in my arms, my cock nestled against her luscious ass, and her scent filling my nose. I slept better than I have in fucking months, and there are zero doubts in my mind that that’s because she was beside me.
But aside from all that, it isn’t a big deal. Or at least, I can pretend it isn’t.
“I can take you,” I offer, figuring that it’ll be the perfect time for me to assure her that I’m not going to make a thing out of yesterday, or this morning.
She was just being a good friend. We both fell asleep, and…the rest was an accident. Or at least, I’m happy for her to believe that.
“Oh no, that’s okay. I’ll call another. Fourth time’s the charm, right?”
“Hailee, don’t do that,” I warn.
“Do what? I’m not doing anything,” she mutters as she taps her cell.
“Well, firstly, you won’t look at me,” I point out.
“I’m just trying to order a—hey,” she complains when I pluck her cell straight from her fingers, and finally, fucking finally, her eyes jump to mine.
“Hi,” I say, my smile growing.
Her eyes bounce between mine. She wants to look away again, I can see it, but for some reason, she doesn’t.
Maybe she likes what she sees.
Or maybe you’re a deluded idiot who’s living in cuckoo land. Whatever.
“Hi,” she breathes. “Look, I appreciate the offer, but I don’t think—”
“Hailee,” I snap, interrupting her. “It’s just a lift home.
I promise you, there won’t be anything glamorous about it.
My car is a heap of junk; the air conditioning is glitchy, and there’s a weird smell I can’t find the source of, but it’s better than standing out here being cancelled on repeatedly.
No one needs that kind of rejection in their life. ”
Her mouth opens and closes, and I mentally give myself a high five for rendering her speechless.
“You’re really not selling it,” she finally says.
“I’ve already got the High School Musical playlist locked and ready to go,” I add.
She shakes her head, but not before I spot the smile.
“Fine, but if it smells that bad, I might chance my luck walking.”
“It’ll take hours.”
“How do you know where I live?” she counters.
“I-I don’t, but…we’re quite a ways out of the city here, and—”
“Thank you, Hayden. I really appreciate it.” Warmth spreads through me. It’s a feeling I could get a little too used to, especially the way it pushes aside some of the grief for the briefest of moments.
“It’s the least I can do for everything you did yesterday.”
“It was nothing.”
I glance over at her as we start walking toward the parking lot.
“It wasn’t, and you know it. Without you, I probably would have spent the rest of the day hiding in my room. And I’d have regretted it.”
“I’m glad I could help.”
When I look over again, she’s trying to wrestle with her purse and small suitcase while attempting to take her jacket off.
“Let me take that,” I say, reaching for her luggage.
“No, it’s—” Her words cut off as my fingers brush against hers, taking the handle from her.
“I’ve got it,” I assure her, moving it against mine, wrapping my fingers around both handles. “Nice choice, by the way.”
“What?” she asks as she finally shrugs her jacket off, leaving her in a pink floral silk cami that’s tucked into her pants, the straps are so delicate against her slender shoulders and I can’t help wondering just how soft the skin is..
“Your luggage.”
She looks down at the two suitcases and laughs when she discovers they’re identical.
“Oh, what are the chances?”
Pretty fucking high considering I copied her when the luggage I brought to LA with me lasted all of three road trips. I figured that she had good taste and would have bought quality, so I bought the exact same ones.
“This is me,” I say, pulling my key from my pocket and unlocking my car.
As I pop the trunk for our luggage, I watch as Hailee takes in the state of it.
I’m sure most guys go out and blow their signing bonus on their dream car, or even a luxury apartment, but I had more important things to do with that money.
“It’s not so bad,” she lies.
“It gets me where I need to go,” I say, a little disappointed when she opens the passenger door herself and drops inside. “So, where are we going?” I ask once I’ve joined her and pull my cell free to use as a GPS.
“Can I?” she asks, holding her hand out.
“All yours,” I say. “Feel free to take a selfie while you’ve got it, so I can add it to your contact. The one I have now is a little serious.”
Without missing a beat, she ignores the Maps app and goes straight for my contacts.
“Oh my god. That’s awful. When did you take that?”
My face heats as I remember snapping it one day when we were waiting to start a press conference.
She was losing her mind because it wasn’t running according to her plan.
I was in awe of her fierceness as she shouted at men well over a foot taller than her as if they were nothing but little kids.
She commanded that room and every single person in it.
I always thought she was hot, but that day, she hit a whole new level.
“So, are you going to redo it?” I ask, avoiding answering her question.
“I don’t think I have a choice. I can’t have you looking at that every time I message you.”
“Planning on doing that often?” I ask, hoping like hell she is. I could use a little more of her in my life.
“I…uh…for work things, yeah.”
“You usually email,” I counter.
“And you usually reply with a GIF,” she points out.
“Just want to make you smile.” I glance over in time to catch one twitching at her lips.
Her eyes meet mine, and she shakes her head.
“Fine,” she finally concedes, opening my camera, turning to her left, and capturing a softer image of herself.
“Happy?” I ask, already knowing that I’ll love it.
“I mean, I don’t look like I’m about to murder someone, so I guess it’s better than the previous one.”
“You looked hot,” I say before I can stop myself.
“I looked terrifying,” she argues.
“A woman who knows what she wants and gets it is always hot, in my opinion.”
She saves her image to her contact without responding to my comment before finally pulling up the app we really need.
Her thumb flies across my screen as she types her address in, and I try not to get carried away with myself at learning where she lives.
I try to picture what her home looks like, how it’s decorated, the kind of furniture she surrounds herself with, but just like all the times before, I can’t quite get a grasp on what she’d choose.
I’m sure many would assume she’d live in a minimalist apartment with bold colors and harsh lines.
Maybe she does. But something tells me that at home, she’s a softer version of the woman we all know and love.
I like the idea that she has a million cute cushions and furry throws on her couch, along with an array of candles, and flowers.
“There,” she says, reaching out and putting my cell in the stand attached to the air vent.
“Let’s get you home then.”
“Yeah,” she muses as I put the car into drive and navigate us out of the parking lot.
The radio plays as we drive, but I don’t register anything that’s said or the songs that play. I’m too busy freaking out over the fact that Hailee Caldwell is sitting next to me, the sweet floral scent of her perfume filling the air and masking the damp smell I can’t get rid of.
“Didn’t you promise me a High School Musical playlist?” she eventually says, breaking the silence.
I chuckle. “Yeah, I guess I was distracted.”
“Glad you’re focused on driving.”
“I don’t remember the last two intersections we passed,” I confess. “I’m not distracted by driving.”
“Oh,” she breathes.
“This morning—”
“Don’t,” Hailee begs, lowering her head.
“I just…I know you want me to forget about it. But…I don’t think that’s going to be possible.
Yesterday, last night, this morning. Fuck, Hailee,” I mutter, dragging my hand down my face.
“It’s like you knew what I needed when I didn’t even know myself.
I need you to know how much I appreciate everything you did.
I know you didn’t have to. I know I’m just the annoying rookie and that you had plenty of other things to be doing, but—”
“Don’t do that,” she warns, cutting me off. “Don’t make out like what you’re going through is less important than anything else. And you’re not annoying, Hayden.”
I can’t help but smile.
“I’m not?”
“Well, okay, you have your moments. But not enough to stop me from being there if you need me.”
“And what if I need you again?”
She cuts me a look. “Don’t push your luck.”
“I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable this morning. I didn’t mean to…you know.”
Liar.
“It’s my fault for falling asleep."
“One thing I know for sure is that none of this is your fault.”
Hailee sighs softly. “It isn’t yours either. I know you wish you could change everything, but you did everything you could.”
“One day, I might agree with you. Right now, all I can think about is how much time I didn’t spend with her, all the times I didn’t return a message or return her call.”
“Did she ever hold it against you?”
“Christ, never. She used to shout at me when I apologized for being busy.”
“You have nothing to worry about. Your sister knew you were living out your dream, and she knew you were there if she needed you.”
“I hope so,” I mutter.
“I know so. She was so proud of you, Hayden. I know I only met her a couple of times, but I could see that from a mile away. And I know she’s gone, but she’s still here watching you, cheering you on.”
I sniff, desperately trying to fight the emotion and the tears that follow right behind, but it’s impossible.
I lift my hand, swiping away a tear that spills over.
“I’m going to keep her alive. I’m going to make sure that people know her name, that she gets to do what she always dreamed of.”
“She’d love that.”
“I hope so. I just…I never want to forget her.”
“Impossible. She will always be with you, Hayden. Always.”
I blow out a shaky breath as I take the final turn, bringing our time together to a close.
My stomach knots with dread. I don’t want to go home alone. I don’t want to say goodbye to Hailee. But I don’t have a choice. It’s time to pull up my big boy pants and try to restart my life.
“There you go,” I say as I pull up out front of her building.
“Thank you, I really appreciate it.”
“It was nothing. I owed you after last night. And this morning,” I add, remembering just how good it felt snuggled up against her.
“You don’t owe me anything,” she says as she pushes the door open and climbs out.
I follow, pop the trunk, and place a suitcase at her feet where she waits on the sidewalk.
“So, I guess I’ll see you next week,” I say, hating how awkward I sound.
“Media day. Yep. I’ll make sure there’s no mention of…anything. Unless…”
I stare down at her, hating the space between us.
“I’m going to have to tell the guys. Everyone.”
“When you’re ready.”
I nod, unsure that I’ll ever be.
“If you need anything in the meantime…”
“You probably shouldn’t offer that. I might be standing at your door later tonight in my pjs for another sleepover.”
Hailee’s brows shoot up.
“I’m joking. I won’t do that.” I already know I want to, though.
“Okay, good. Last night was a one-time thing.”
I smirk at her. “I bet that’s what you tell all the boys.”
Panic washes across her face. “Oh no, that’s not. I don’t…I don’t do what we did last night. I’m professional. I never, ever cross the line. I don’t—”
“Hailee,” I say, squeezing her upper arm. “I’m joking. I know you’re not working your way through the team. You’re the most dedicated and professional person I’ve ever met.”
Her cheeks burn as she shifts on her feet.
It’s so strange seeing her like this. She’s usually so strong and takes zero shit from anyone. So to see her blush, and to be the one who makes her do it…fuck. It does things to me.
“I’ve never slept with a player or anyone at the organization,” she blurts.
“Okay. For the record, I haven’t either.”
“Right, well. Thanks for this,” she says as she pulls the handle of her suitcase up and takes a step back. “I’ll see you next week then.”
She takes off toward her building, but I don’t move. I can’t.
“Hailee?” I call when she’s halfway toward the entrance.
She looks back over her shoulder and startles when she finds that I’m chasing her.
The second she’s in reaching distance, I pull her in for a hug.
It takes her a few seconds to react, but eventually, she wraps her arms around my waist.
“Thank you,” I whisper against her hair.
“Y-you’re welcome,” she stutters into my chest.
Unable to release her within an appropriate couple of seconds, I hold her a little longer before I force myself to unwrap my arms. I don’t look at her, I can’t.
Instead, I turn around and march back to my car.
I climb into the driver’s seat, put my seat belt on, start the engine—and just before I pull away, I finally let my eyes close.
But she’s gone, and the time we shared together is over.
I drive home with a heavy heart, and it only gets worse when I step into my apartment.