Chapter 11
HAYDEN
“This is an intervention,” Killer states the second I open my front door. He shoves past me, inviting himself inside, quickly followed by Rett, Handsy, Linc, and Kodie.
“Uh…sure. Come in. I wasn’t busy or anything,” I mutter, watching them all make themselves at home in my tiny apartment.
If I didn’t already know it was ridiculously small, then I would now seeing four hockey players inside.
“You look really busy,” Linc points out, jerking his chin at my glasses, before glancing at the book on my coffee table.
“Have you even showered today?” Rett asks, wrinkling his brow.
“I was going to after I finished my next chapter.”
“Well, that’s the biggest load of bullshit I’ve ever heard. Freya never does what she says she’s gonna do after another chapter. There’s always another, and then another, and then another. And before you know it, she’s finished the whole thing.”
“Bookworm problems,” I mock, combing my fingers through my messy hair in a pathetic attempt to tame it.
“Go and shower, then we’re going out,” Linc states.
“Going out where?” I ask hesitantly.
“That’s for us to know,” Rett teases. “Now go and shower and get dressed or we’ll drag you out like you are. But I gotta tell you, man, NHL contract or not, the women won’t want you smelling like that.”
“Fuck you,” I grunt before turning my back on them all and marching toward my bathroom, grabbing a clean pair of boxers and shorts along the way.
But as I close the bathroom door behind me, I can’t help but smile.
The afternoon we got back from the wedding, I felt brave and I messaged our group chat and explained what had happened and apologized for avoiding them.
As I should have expected, every single one of them was incredibly supportive. While our group chat continued, each of them messaged me privately, sending their condolences and asking if there was anything they could do, if me or my family needed anything.
I’ve seen Rett and Linc since. We hit the gym the following day, and I worked out until I couldn’t feel my legs. I tried to keep up with my training while I was at home, but it was hard. Who am I kidding, everything was—and still is—hard work.
But I must admit that day by day, it’s getting easier. And I’m hoping by the time we’re officially back at work that it’ll get easier still.
I have a quick shower. I should probably shave, too, but I don’t want to make them wait longer than necessary out there. Unlike their places, it’s not exactly luxury, and my couch is anything but comfortable.
“Gonna tell me what we’re doing yet?” I ask when I emerge and find myself a T-shirt.
“You’re gonna need these,” Rett says, passing me my rollerblades.
I raise a brow, keeping my arms by my sides.
“Ours are in our cars. We’re going to the beach.”
“Keep talking.”
“Breakfast at Kath’s, and then a little soccer, go for a swim. Pizza after?”
I pretend to think about it. “Will there be ice cream?”
“If our rookie wants ice cream, then we can get ice cream,” Kodie agrees.
“Aw, I’ve heard him say that exact thing to Sutton,” Killer teases.
I shake my head, unable to fight my smile. Damn, I love these guys.
They don’t care that I’m younger or less experienced than they are. They accept me for exactly who I am and show up for me when I need it the most. I’m so fucking lucky to have been signed by the Vipers and ended up with these guys as my teammates. My friends.
“If I can get sprinkles and sauce, I’m in.” I laugh.
“You can have whatever the fuck you want, Marilyn,” Kodie says, pushing to his feet and walking toward the door.
I keep my lips slammed shut, because what I really want isn’t possible.
My eyes catch on the suitcase sitting beside my couch.
It’s been five days since the wedding. I thought I’d have heard something by now.
The fact I haven’t tells me everything I need to know about those few hours we spent together.
She really meant what she said that morning in my hotel room.
She has forgotten all about it. All about me.
I thought… I thought she’d a least check in after everything that happened.
With a sigh, I slip my feet into my sneakers, shove my skates into a rucksack, pocket my cell, place a hat on my head, and follow them out.
I wasn’t planning on spending all day on the couch reading; I was going to hit the gym and go to the grocery store. But this is so much better.
The guys all joke around as they get their skates on. Just hearing their voices and their laughter makes me feel lighter.
In only a few minutes, we take off toward the ocean.
It’s a fucking distance from my place, but I’m up for the challenge, and by the time we skate down the promenade, I am more than ready for the breakfast I was promised.
“Fuck,” Linc grunts as he falls into a chair at one of the diner’s outside tables. “I need another few weeks.”
“If only,” Kodie agrees.
“Nah, I’m ready for it,” Killer states.
“Same,” I agree.
“I’m not ready to constantly be saying goodbye to Bea and missing out on all the baby stuff.”
“Who are you, and what have you done with Everett Donnelly?” Linc deadpans.
“I dunno what to say, man. I’m fucking gone for that girl.”
I watch Rett, the way his whole expression softens as he talks about Bea.
I’m sure he’d be the first one to say he never saw her coming, but damn, we didn’t either.
“Just you and me now, Marilyn,” Killer states. “I’m gonna need you as a wingman after our home opener.”
“You don’t need my help. You’re more than capable of pulling multiple bunnies in one night.”
“Pfft, of course I am. That’s not in question. It’s just nice to have a partner in crime.”
“You know, it’ll get old eventually,” Kodie warns.
“Maybe so. But that isn’t now, and with you lot out of the game, someone needs to reassure the bunnies that we haven’t forgotten them.”
“There are plenty of others on the team who are willing to play that game,” Linc points out.
“Yeah,” Killer mutters. “But they’re not you guys.”
“Aw, Calvin. Are you getting all soft on us?”
“Hell, no. What I meant to say was that you’re a bunch of assholes, but I’m grateful you’ve left all the bunnies to me. It’s going to be a fucking epic season, boys.”
We don’t have drinks yet, so instead of raising a glass, we all put our fists in.
“To an awesome season,” we all sing.
Thankfully, the server comes over with menus and a coffee pot, and we all fall silent as we decide what we want to eat.
I make my decision pretty fast, and after lowering the menu, I scan the faces of the men around me.
“I don’t want to make a big deal about it because I’m kinda a mess and I don’t want to ruin the day by getting emotional, but I just want to tell you all how much I appreciate you.” Despite not wanting to get emotional, my voice cracks on the final few words.
“What did I tell you, man?” Rett says after throwing his arm around my shoulder. “We’ve got you. Always.”
The others agree, and thankfully, the conversation changes to the upcoming season and all attention turns away from me.
We have the best day. My skin is tender from the last of the summer sun, and my cheeks ache from laughing so much. It’s not something I thought I’d feel again for the longest time. But clowning around on the beach with the guys allowed me to let go of everything for a few hours.
At some point this afternoon, we were joined by Casey and Sutton, Freya, Bea, and Parker, who also brought Darcy and Brooke with her.
Brooke has spent most of the afternoon filming footage of us. Thirst traps, apparently. I swear to God, if she tells me to walk out of the ocean pretending I’m James Bond one more time, her cell is gonna be swimming with the fishes.
“Oh, yeah. That’s the one. The bunnies are gonna go feral over this.”
“Can you not stop her?” Kodie complains to Casey.
“You think I want to stop this? Are you crazy?” Casey shouts back from her position, lying out on a lounger with the others. Each of them has their sunglasses on, but I know they’re watching. I can feel their attention on me. I’m pretty sure Darcy is enjoying himself a little too much as well.
“We’re not exhibits at the fucking zoo.”
“Aw, Big D is getting grumpy,” Rett teases. “Do we need to get you an ice cream with sprinkles and extra sauce?”
“Fuck off, Donnelly.”
“Looking good, baby,” Parker catcalls Linc, making Rett groan.
“It’s all yours, pretty girl. You can make the most of it later. Aw,” Linc complains when Rett smacks him around the head.
As I watch the girls watch us, I can’t help but think someone’s missing.
I know she hardly ever hangs out with us all, but it still feels wrong.
When Brooke finally lets up, we all collapse on towels and loungers.
Unable to stop myself, I reach into my bag for my cell, and I’m tapping out a message before I can second-guess it.
Hayden: Hey, how’s it going? We’re all hanging out at the beach if you fancy joining us.
My heart slams against my ribs as I read back my message.
I shake my head, wondering why I thought it was a good idea.
She’ll never come. Hell, she probably won’t even read my message.
Feeling stupid, I put my cell face down on the towel and try to forget it ever happened.
“Beer?” Rett asks, passing a bottle over.
I shouldn’t. Training camp is almost upon us, and despite all my distractions, I want to be ready.
One won’t hurt, though.
I twist the top off and lift it to my lips, swallowing down the cool liquid. But it does very little to calm me down.
“Shall we order food?” Bea asks, clearly forgetting who she’s surrounded by.
The loud “yes” that comes back nearly knocks her off her lounger.
We place a colossal order that includes almost every side being delivered right to us.
Despite my cell being right there, I refuse to pick it up and check.
I know she won’t have read it, and she certainly won’t have replied. I don’t need the disappointment.
Instead, I focus on my friends. On Bea’s pregnancy tales, Sutton’s hilarious stories about school and her future husband, Adrian. Casey talks about Coach and the things he’s told her he has planned for us. It’s all so normal, everything I need.
Of course, the huge, gaping hole in my heart is still there, but the pain has eased a little.
“I need to pee. Anyone fancy escorting me?” Bea asks, climbing to her feet.
“I’ll go,” I say, mindlessly reaching for my cell before hopping to my feet and catching up with her.
When I glance back, I find Rett watching us.
He catches my eye and nods, silently telling me to take care of his girl.
I nod back in agreement.
Bea’s been checking in on me daily, and I know she’s the one behind the care packages I’ve been receiving every day since I got home.
Rett is really fucking lucky to have found her.
“You’re looking good today,” Bea says once we’re away from the group. “How are you feeling?”
“It’s been a good day,’ I say honestly. “I should have told them all sooner.”
“It doesn’t matter now. They know, and they’re here for you.”
“Yeah,” I muse.
“What? What’s wrong?”
I shake my head, unsure what to say. “I…” I trail off. “Thank you for all the deliveries.”
Bea tries to hide her smile, but she fails. “You’re welcome,” she mumbles. “I hate that you’re hurting, and I want to help.”
“You are. You all are.”
She pulls me in for a quick hug before darting into the bathroom. I make the most of the facilities, and I lean my ass against the wall outside the restrooms as I wait for her.
Despite knowing I shouldn’t look, I pull my cell from my pocket and wake it up.
My heart sinks.
She hasn’t replied.
But I discover the second I unlock my cell that she’s read it. Disappointment and embarrassment crashes into me.