32. Chapter 32
Maryn
The days after a ball were always the calmest of the week. Too quiet. Too still. I’d been pacing my room for an hour when voices in the hall stopped me.
I pressed my ear to the door as they grew louder.
“I don’t know, Lydia. What do you want me to say? You should be happy.”
Lydia’s words were softer, and I cracked my door.
“I don’t care about my brother. I care about what happens to us if we can’t have sons within five years.”
The silence stretched, and I poked my head into the hall.
“Can’t you ask your dad to do something?” Lydia’s voice was low and vicious.
Sera gave a dry laugh. “Who do you think passed the new law?”
The sound of a bowl crashing against Sera’s wall made me wince, and I ducked my head back into my room as Sera’s door flew open.
I pressed the door closed softly, leaning against it, my heartbeat loud in my ears.
A tap against the door made me jump. I held my breath.
“Eavesdropping, Middle Girl?”
I pressed my palms flat against the door, planting my heels.
The door handle rattled. “Even if he chooses you, you aren’t safe,” Lydia sneered. “None of us are safe now.”
Footsteps sounded as she retreated from my door, and my breath escaped in a rush.
“Five years is all we get,” she shouted as her door slammed shut.
I leaned against the metal at my back, eyes sliding closed. My heart raced, but it wasn’t Lydia’s threat. It was the threat to all women.
My tablet buzzed. I pushed off the door, lifting it from my bedside table.
Private Message.
Frowning, I touched the screen.
Elias Hale glowed in white letters. I tapped his name, my pulse speeding.
I want to see you. Tonight?
I read it twice. Then a third time. My thumb hovered over the screen.
Yes.
My fingers drummed the side of the device.
Six?
I glanced at the time. My heart hadn’t slowed.
Perfect.
***
A black car rolled to a stop, and Elias stepped out. His bright eyes lit as he took me in, none of the coldness from our last interaction present.
Had he forgiven me?
I descended the steps, pasting a demure smile on my face.
He reached for my hand, lifting it to his lips. His gaze drifted to my ears. “You wore them.”
I touched the chip of blue at my ear. “Yes.”
He held the door wide, and I sank into the passenger seat.
“Where would you like to go?”
His question took me by surprise. But it wasn’t one I could answer honestly. I pursed my lips.
“Back to The Eden? Somewhere new?” His fingers tapped lightly on the wheel as he pulled onto the empty street.
This was my chance to ask for anything, but my mind was full of only one thing.
“Does it matter?”
I bit down on my lip, but it was too late; the words were out.
Elias’s fingers stilled. A stone settled in my stomach, and I closed my eyes, wishing I could take it back.
The car drifted to the right. Stopped.
I swallowed, opening my eyes. He was staring at me, sharp eyes cataloging whatever my face had given away. He wasn’t Calden, but his discernment could be unnerving—when he was paying attention.
“Did you want to come on a date with me?” The words were soft, a little broken.
My heart squeezed involuntarily. “Yes.”
He frowned. “Even I can’t convince myself that was true.”
My breathing faltered as my gaze dipped to his hand squeezing the steering wheel.
“I heard about the new law.” I tore my gaze away, staring out the window, everything I’d been carrying too heavy tonight. Something cracked inside me. Something dangerous.
I blinked several times, turning to face him. “Why are we made to go through all this for a chance at happiness, if it can all be wrenched away in an instant?”
My eyes burned, but this time I didn’t blink the tears away.
Elias stared, saying nothing.
Stupidly, I went on. “What hope is there for any woman?”
We looked at one another, the silence more damning than any words.
When my tears had stopped, and still he said nothing, I clasped my hands in my lap, my thumb tracing the edge of each of my fingers.
“I want to show you something.”
He faced forward, both hands back on the wheel, and we lurched ahead.
I exhaled a slow breath, eyes drifting to the window. My thumb continued its path over each of my fingers, and I fixed my gaze on the blackness outside.
We stopped at the wall, and my stomach dropped. In the back seat, our silent chaperone sat forward. Elias raised a hand, and she slid back once more.
The door cracked open, and Elias rolled down his window. “We’re going to visit my match’s parents.” He smiled; it was all teeth.
I longed to tear my glove off and feel the rough edges of my nails.
On dark streets, people walked in pairs or groups, moving aside as we passed. We turned down a road I didn’t recognize, passing the one to my house without a sideways glance from Elias.
My pounding heart beat harder as we left the Middle and approached the Lower.
“Elias,” I breathed.
He glanced at me but said nothing.
I unlaced my fingers, digging my nails into the armrests as our speed increased. Out here, so far from the Center, the buildings became one long row of windows. No lights. No people on the street.
My tablet buzzed, and I glanced down. A red box flashed around a warning message.
“Elias?”
“Almost there.”
His words were clipped; my pulse galloped.
Finally, we slowed, pulling to a stop in front of a massive building with blacked-out windows. I leaned forward, swallowing when a drone circled overhead.
“My windows are one way,” Elias said.
“What is this place?”
He ran a hand through his hair, staring at the building illuminated by his headlights. “This is my father’s answer to making more sons.”
I inhaled sharply. From the outside, there was no way to tell what they did inside. Ben Cannon’s answer during my fourth trial came back to me. The one they had cut when they aired it on Monday.
“They’re working on serums to increase the likelihood of male offspring.”
I hadn’t spent much time thinking about it then. Now, pieces of a puzzle were beginning to fit together.
“What happens in there, Elias?”
He angled himself toward me, searching my face, and his jaw tightened.
“It doesn’t matter. When I’m president, I’ll put a stop to it. This facility, the new law, all of it.”
He was the most powerful man in the nation, save his father. And he was making promises about some day.
A hysterical laugh burst out of me. I slapped a hand over my mouth. Too late.
His lips pressed into a flat line. “You don’t believe me.”
I sat back, unable to look at him. “Take me home.”
“Maryn.”
“Please.”
Elias ground his teeth together, but I stared straight ahead. His eyes burned the side of my face.
“I’m not like other men. I wouldn’t leave you after five years.” He slammed his hand against the steering wheel, and I jumped. “After ten years… ever.”
I said nothing, the tightness growing in my chest with each moment we didn’t move.
He looked away.
The car circled around, pulling onto the main road, and he pressed down on the pedal.
When we reached the Middle, familiar street signs twisted my gut. I closed my eyes so I wouldn’t have to see them and be reminded of my once naive life.
The car slowed, and I blinked, glancing around. We stopped in the middle of the street.
Elias turned toward me, reaching for my hand.
I flinched back, and he halted, hurt painted across his face.
“I didn’t know. I swear.”
A flush of heat rose in my chest, an angry cloud of rage I couldn’t suppress any longer. I opened my mouth, but nothing came out. I didn’t have words. I couldn’t muster another lie to placate this man.
Reaching for the door handle, I gripped it hard.
“Maryn.”
I swiveled to face him.
“I’m trying.”
His eyes were pleading, begging me to see him as the hero he thought he was. I scoffed, twisting toward the door and shoving it open, stumbling out onto the street.
My feet were moving before my brain could catch up.
Elias’s door swung open behind me.
I moved faster, running.
“Maryn!”
I ducked into an alley, breathing hard and pressed my back to the wall.
“Maryn!” Elias’s voice was quieter as he ran in the wrong direction.
I exhaled a long breath.
A hand clamped over my mouth, muffling my scream as another arm wrapped around my middle, pulling me farther into the darkness.
I opened my mouth and bit down hard on meaty fingers.
“Mother Damn,” Lucen hissed in my ear, and I let out a small sob.
He released me, shaking out his hand.
“Lucen.” My voice came out smaller than I intended. My hands were shaking. I pressed them flat against my sides.
He peered around me before meeting my eyes. “What are you doing out here?”
“Elias brought me.” I glanced back toward the street. "How did you know I'd be here?"
“Why aren’t you with him?” he asked, ignoring my question.
I shook my head. “It’s awful. I can’t—”
Lucen’s jaw tightened. He looked away.
“I have information.”
His frown morphed into a scowl. “That’s not your job.”
“But I know about a secret building. I think I cou—”
“You have one mission,” he cut me off.
My gaze dropped to my shoes. “I messed up.”
Lucen’s rough fingers found my chin, lifting it. “What happened?”
“I said something I shouldn’t have.”
“Are you out?”
I looked away.
“Are you?”
“I don’t know,” I admitted, meeting his eyes. “How did you find me?”
“We have eyes, don’t we?”
“Has the inside man revealed himself yet? I could send you information if—”
Lucen growled, spitting beside my feet, and I stilled. “Get yourself back inside the wall. You’re almost there.” He shoved a small pouch at my chest. My fingers curled around it and I stuffed it into my pocket.
I nodded, my lower lip beginning to quiver. “I’ll try.”
“No.”
“Dad.”
Lucen’s shoulders went rigid, eyes widening, and he looked around the dark. His eyes met mine, cold as steel. “Never. Say that.”
I blinked several times. “I’m sorry.”
“Go.”
He melted back into the shadows, and I gave myself a moment, one breath, before straightening and stepping out of the alley.
I walked back the way I’d come, touching the bulge in my pocket.
His car sat in the middle of the street right where we’d stopped. I marched toward it, chin high.
My chaperone darted for me, grabbing my shoulders and shaking them. “I’m sorry,” I whispered, shame washing through me. She would have been severely punished if anyone knew. I lifted a hand, touching her arm.
She shook me again, eyes wild.
“Maryn!”
Elias jogged toward us, and she dropped her hands, stepping back.
He stopped half a foot away. “I was so worried.”
I nodded. “I shouldn’t have run from you.”
“I shouldn’t have brought you out here.”
I looked up, meeting his eyes. “You wanted to share something with me and I… wasn’t receptive to it.”
Elias closed the distance between us, wrapping an arm around me. I willed myself to relax, to melt into him.
He dipped his head to the top of mine, stroking a hand over my hair. “Just promise me you won’t run from me again.”