49. Chapter 49 #2
I splashed my face. Again.
The welts were deflating.
I lifted a leg into the sink, cupping water and pouring it over tender flesh, then did the same with the others. The water ran down my thighs, and I reached for the soap, foaming it between my fingers and scrubbing between my legs.
I rubbed harder. Until it burned from my fingers and nothing else.
When I’d washed the rain—and his dirty fingers—away, I slid down the wall, my head falling against it.
Thoughts strayed to the tender flesh at my hips, my breast.
I had killed a man tonight. He had put his hands on me, and I had killed him. Both of those things were true; I didn’t know which one my body was still shaking from.
I stood. The night wasn’t over.
Calden wouldn’t leave. He would wait all night. I would too.
Ear pressed to the door, I waited for the sound to die before moving haltingly to August’s office, leaving the door slightly ajar.
The steady thud of boots in the hall only seemed to grow. Every guard in the area had come inside to get out of the rain.
I stood, touching the bottles that had been saved after my failed assassination attempt. If it had gone according to plan, I wouldn’t be here now.
My hands were clean. I’d scrubbed them twice. I could still feel it.
I tipped a bottle to my lips, taking a swig.
It didn’t matter. None of that mattered now.
***
I lifted my head, staring groggily around the space. I must have dozed off at some point, waiting for the soldiers to go back outside. There were no windows in this room. No way to tell how long it had been.
I stood. Stretching out my aching knees. I listened; hearing nothing, I stepped back into the hall.
A man, dressed all in black, weapon holstered, rushed toward me. “Miss. Come with me.”
“What?” I backed up.
He followed, and my pulse thrummed wildly. “What’s wrong?”
“The president is looking for you.”
My heart climbed into my throat. “Elias? Why?”
“I don’t know, miss.”
He made no move to grab or restrain me as he stood in the doorway. I moved past him, and he followed, steps smacking the floor at my heels. I walked faster.
We reached a small alcove lined with windows. Helena spun around, hair a fluffy ball on her head. Her eyes were wide, a look of shock painted over her face.
She rushed forward, arms outstretched. “Oh, there you are, my darling girl.”
She pulled me into the weakest hug I’d ever felt. Her featherlight fingers touched my shoulders as she leaned back. “Elias is so worried. We thought the rebels took you.”
I glanced around at the guards in black standing around the room, staring at nothing.
Behind Helena, purple streaked the glass, running in long lines over my view of the outside world. My view of freedom.
My stomach sank.
“Maryn!” Elias burst into the room, gathering me up in his arms. He kissed my head, my face, then he leaned back, looking me over. “Are you hurt? I thought you were taken.”
He pulled me against his chest, squeezing until I couldn’t breathe.
“I’m fine.” I gasped out, thanking the mother that the welts had faded to nothing overnight.
He loosened his hold. “What happened to you?” His eyes bored into mine. “We searched everywhere.”
My stomach bottomed out. What could I say? What would he believe? How would I ever escape now?
“I was in your dad’s office.”
He gave me a strange look, as if trying to puzzle me out.
The guard I’d followed stepped forward. “It’s true, sir. She came out of President Hale’s office.”
Elias was silent, the entire room was, as he stared at me. My fear was so thick I could taste it.
Finally, his hands dropped from my shoulders. “Why?”
Think Maryn. Fucking think.
“I wanted… to see him again.”
Elias stared with utter disbelief. Around us, the soldiers shuffled their feet.
Helena rushed forward, wrapping a thin arm around my shoulder. “Of course you did, honey. He was your president. It’s natural to feel that sort of loss like a personal blow.”
She patted my arm, leading me out of the room and toward the kitchen. “Come, let’s have some tea.”
A pang of homesickness hit hard, making my knees buckle. Helena’s hold tightened, unnaturally strong for her, and she held me up. “Keep walking.”
Her tone was sharp. Nothing like the soft woman she always played.
In the kitchen, Elias stood behind me. I felt his eyes on my back.
I hunched my shoulders, accepting a cup from Helena.
He came around and stood beside me, taking the tea his mother offered. His gaze darted back to me. I was frozen, unable to look at him. No one would believe that lie. I didn’t believe it.
Helena sat across from us and smiled. “It must be so hard.” She patted my hand.
I lifted my cup to my lips, knuckles white. “What?” It was a little breathless, and I cursed myself for struggling so hard to keep my composure.
“I haven’t been able to sleep in this house either.” She glanced at Elias.
I exhaled into my cup instead of answering.
“Elias. Why did you make her sleep here, knowing the rebels can get in?”
He stiffened, gaze darting between us. “Are you scared?”
I nodded, not trusting myself to sound believable. I didn’t know why Helena was helping me, but I would give her anything she asked for after this.
I turned toward him, squeezing my cup handle.
His jaw worked. Then his expression settled. He touched my cheek, tracing a line under my chin and lifted it until our eyes met.
“I won’t let anything happen to you. I promise.”