20. ALEX
20
ALEX
E very time I spent time with Charlotte, I got to know a different side of her. She was witty, sharp, a challenge. But she was also kind and gentle and caring. And if she’d offended me by assuming things about me, it was only because of her past.
Gabe talked about his life before he moved to Rhode Island so little, and maybe I should have asked about it more. But Gabe was always so happy-go-lucky. It didn’t look like anything bothered him, ever.
Maybe it didn’t. Maybe between the two of them, Charlotte was the one who carried all the pain, and Gabe was the one who’d escaped it all.
That happened in families. Even when they weren’t blood related.
My brothers and I each had our own burdens to bear, and sometimes, it felt like I was the only one carrying the heavy weight by myself when Chris had his adventures and Daniel could fly away from here whenever he felt like it.
Charlotte stood in front of me, only a blanket wrapped around her, and she looked up at me with hazel eyes that filled with so much emotion I felt like I was drowning in it.
The moment between us was electric.
I knew all of this was wrong. I wasn’t supposed to feel about her this way. Hell, I didn’t ever feel about anyone this way. Something about her was so different, and it made me feel different.
And that was scary as fuck.
I wasn’t scared of a lot. I’d been to hell and back more times than I could count before I was a teenager, and when shit like that happens to you, there isn’t a lot of pain that can still scare you off.
It wasn’t pain that scared me now, though. It was everything about Charlotte that was good. I didn’t deserve good. She was perfect, blemish-free.
And I was scarred.
Maybe not on the outside. The scars I’d had as a child had faded, healed after years and years of not being hurt anymore. But that didn’t mean they weren’t still there on the inside. I was marred and Charlotte was perfect.
She closed her eyes and leaned her forehead against my chest, and I wanted to protect her from everything out there. All the pain and hurt and all the horrible things people did to each other.
Thunder clapped loudly overhead, and lightning struck dangerously close to us. This storm had become wildly electrical, and if we stayed up here, we were in trouble.
Charlotte relished in the danger up here, but I knew what could happen. I knew how the sea could consume you, how a storm could drown you or burn you to a crisp.
“We should go back downstairs.”
Charlotte looked up at me, lips parted. She wanted to say something, but then another bolt of lightning snapped so close I could feel the electricity running over my skin.
“It will be safer lower down.”
She nodded, and I took her hand, leading her back to the stairs. I let her go first, making sure she got down okay before I followed her to the tarp.
“Do you want some more water?” I asked.
She shook her head. “I think we should save it for when we really need it. I’m okay for now.”
I nodded.
I wished I had something with me that could make this evening a little more romantic. A picnic basket with bread and cheese and grapes, maybe. Some wine would be nice.
And candles to light up the place.
I walked to the shelf.
“What are you doing?”
“There might be supplies here we can use.”
“Like what?”
“And old lamp, maybe. Matches. This room has stayed dry over the years, from the looks of things. Maybe we can make something work.”
A lamp stood on the shelf. It was an old kerosene lamp. I grabbed it and studied it, but the kerosene had long since dried up.
“Fuck,” I muttered.
“What?”
“The lamp is out of kerosene. I was hoping we could have some light.” Lightning lit up the place, and my gaze fell on the old trunk.
“We’ll be okay,” Charlotte said. “We don’t have anything we need to cook, and our body heat will keep us warm. At least it’s not winter.”
“Thank God.” I tied my blanket around my waist like a towel so I could use both my hands.
I opened the trunk and rummaged through it. I found bits of rope, rags, a few odd tools. Lightning struck again, and the light reflected off a tin. When I lifted it up, it had liquid in it. I shook it to be sure.
“What’s that?”
“If this is what I’m hoping it is…” I opened the cap and sniffed it, coughing when I inhaled the pungent, diesel-like smell.
“Kerosene.”
“How is that possible?”
“It’s been sealed, and I think it might have been left here more recently. Maybe we’re not the first people to use this place as a haven overnight. Now all we need…” I kept rummaging, hoping beyond hope that this good luck would last and I would find the last thing I actually needed.
My fingers found a little box, and when I pushed it open and fiddled inside, it was exactly what we needed.
Matches.
There were only two left, but it was better than nothing.
I carried the lamp to the table.
“I can’t see much,” I said. “Can you help me?”
Charlotte shifted, coming closer to the table. She sat on a chair.
“What do you need me to do?”
“Just hold the lamp steady.” I carefully screwed off the glass chimney. I opened the brass lamp, and feeling where the opening was with my fingers, I poured kerosene into it. The smell of the fluid filled the air, and Charlotte coughed.
When the lamp was filled, I put the wick back in place.
“Here goes nothing.” I struck a match.
By some miracle, the match caught fire, and it didn’t burn out. It had to be some kind of miracle because finding a lamp, kerosene, and dry matches in this place was highly unlikely. But I wasn’t going to question fate right now.
I held the match to the wick. It took a moment before it caught alight, but the kerosene seeped into the wick, and the flame burned bright.
Warm golden light flooded from the lamp, and when I looked at Charlotte, she beamed at me. The soft light made her features that much more beautiful.
I screwed the chimney back onto the lamp and pushed it to the middle of the table so that we didn’t risk knocking it over.
Charlotte sat back, and I took a seat on the other side of the table. We stared at the little flame, dancing happily now that it had enough fuel to burn.
“How did you know how to do that?” she asked.
“What? It’s just a kerosene lamp.”
“Yeah, I know. But you’re just… you know, rich. ”
I blinked at her, and she blushed. “I mean…” She shook her head. “You just seem to know a lot about survival, and I didn’t think you would need to know anything like that. Since you have enough money to survive.”
I chuckled. “Just because I have a lot of money doesn’t mean I don’t want to learn about things like survival. Chris and I used to go on adventures together all the time. We learned how to pitch tents, how to follow tracks, read the stars, start fires…”
“I didn’t take you for that kind of guy. You look like the type who belongs in a boardroom, not in a tent.”
I cocked a grin at her. “The wild mountain man idea doesn’t suit me?”
She blushed again. In the dim light, I could see her cheeks flush now, and I liked it when she was flustered like that.
“Well, it actually does. I mean, a rugged beard and some tattered clothes could work. But I don’t think they’d take you so seriously in your meetings.”
I barked a laugh. “No, they wouldn’t. It’s all about image out there, isn’t it? Sometimes, I wish I could just head into the mountains and disappear.” I ran my fingers over my chin, which had become stubbly. “Grow a beard, not worry about tailored suits and shiny shoes and using the right words so that the world doesn’t think we’re the bad guys.” I glanced at her. “Words like sustainable and eco-friendly.”
Charlotte shook her head. “I know I was wrong to call you out in the press release. I shouldn’t have done that. I wasn’t thinking.” She glanced up at me. “I’m sorry about that.”
“It happens,” I said. “I think it pissed me off because you were drawing attention to something I didn’t want the world to see. I mean, you weren’t wrong.”
She frowned.
“I’m planning to make changes, you know. That’s what I wanted to brainstorm with you about when I called.”
“What?”
“New yachts. Electric engines, maybe solar or wind energy… something that might change the emissions.”
Charlotte’s eyes widened. “That’s very forward-thinking of you.”
“And they say billionaires can’t change.”
Charlotte chuckled. “Do they say that?”
“I don’t know. I think I pretty much think that about us and our company, sometimes. Not in a bad way. We’ve just always done things one way, and we’re very serious about what we do and carrying forward the family legacy. The Blackwood name…” I thought about the company my dad had started and given to four children who weren’t related to him by blood. He’d given us everything, changed our lives, given us a shot at greatness when we didn’t deserve it. At least, I didn’t deserve it. “It means a lot to us.”
“It’s so nice to have such a close family,” Charlotte said. “It’s rare, you know. Some families can be so broken and so twisted.”
“Yeah.” If anyone knew, it was me.
“Life is strange sometimes. What are the odds that you and me would end up here at an abandoned lighthouse together? The yacht manufacturer and the activist?”
I chuckled. “It sounds like the start of a bad joke.”
She laughed.
Or a good love story , I thought, but I didn’t say it.
The rain beat relentlessly against the lighthouse, but the lightning and thunder had moved further away.
Charlotte shivered.
“Are you cold?”
“Yeah.”
“Come on,” I said and stood. I held out my hand, and when she took it, we sat down on the tarp together. I pulled her tightly against me, the length of my body pressed against hers to warm her up. She shivered another time, but then she slowly started to relax.
It was intoxicating to have her this close, her warmth seeping into me. Her natural scent was incredible, and her body fit against mine perfectly.
I stroked my fingers through her hair.
I wasn’t supposed to get this close to her, but I didn’t want this to end. We were stuck here on a little island in an abandoned lighthouse, and right now, there was nowhere else I’d rather be and no one else I’d rather be with.
The world was so far away, on the other side of this massive storm, and it was just the two of us together.
I traced my fingers around her ear, slowly dragged a finger down her jaw, and cupped her cheek.
Charlotte tilted her head up to look at me, and in the dim light of the little lamp, her eyes were pools of brown, drinking me in. I brushed my thumb across her lower lip and looked into her eyes.
Her gaze slid to my lips, and she shifted up a little, the swell of her breasts pushing against my chest.
“We shouldn’t do this,” she whispered.
“I know.”
She touched her fingers to my lips before she replaced them with her mouth and pressed her lips against mine.