Chapter Three
A steaming plate of braised short ribs was placed in front of me, making my mouth water.
I knew it was delusional, but my parents had been so nice all day that I was holding onto a glimmer of hope that maybe they would magically present me with a set of shiny car keys by the end of dinner.
A groan worked its way out of my mouth when the ribs almost melted on my tongue.
“Do you want your present now or after dessert?” my dad asked, already knowing the answer. I shot him a pointed look. My mother’s forced smile let me know that she might not totally approve of this gift, and that did nothing to dampen my fantasy about a car with a big red bow.
Cautiously, I opened the manila envelope he handed me and found what looked like graph paper. I squinted, confused.
“It’s a blank floor plan of our basement,” my mom said, not helping with my understanding at all, and handed me a purple gift bag. Inside were stacks of design magazines and a note with a number on it. A number with many more zeroes than I was accustomed to seeing.
“We’ve decided to let you remodel the downstairs,” my dad finally explained. “You may take the lead, work with the contractor, and make the decisions.”
All previous thoughts of automobiles forgotten, my chest suddenly felt like someone had overfilled it with air. Every month, I devoured design magazines and had ripped-out pages stashed all over my room.
“We’ve been meaning to do it forever, and now seemed like as good a time as any. We will have veto power, but the choices are yours,” my mom explained.
I skipped the verbal ‘thank you,’ instead throwing my arms around both my parents.
The rest of the evening could have featured flying monkeys, and I wouldn’t have noticed.
I was lost in a world of color and fabric, hardly looking up when servers brought cake with a candle.
It no longer mattered how I traveled to and from my house because I was going to design my own personal haven while I was there.
* * *
Saturday night had finally had the decency to arrive, but a frown was slowly settling on my face as I caught a glimpse of my sweatpants-clad self in the mirror.
I’d picked out a light blue sundress earlier that morning, but it was clearly not right for the bonfire now that I was supposed to be dressed and ready.
Everything from my closet currently resided elsewhere, ranging from the floor to hanging over the door, and yet nothing was calling out to me. Livy’s Jeep pulled up outside, and I knew my friends were going to lose their shit over my general state of chaos.
Oh well.
They let themselves in as usual, their voices growing exponentially louder as they giggled their way up the stairs.
“Holy hurricane, what—” Livy started, daring to criticize my outfit curating process, but after I shot her a look, she shut up, pressing her pink glossy lips together and flopping onto the unmade bed.
“I take it we’re not leaving yet,” Kim stated obviously, her hair done up in curls, making her look like a member of a musical ensemble.
I wished Kimmy would let me give her a makeover right then and there, but I bit my tongue.
She was adorable in a girl-next-door way—her tiny features sprinkled with freckles.
But she just never looked quite comfortable in her skin.
“I know the right outfit is here…I’m just not seeing it,” I contemplated.
Nothing too slutty, nothing too juvenile, nothing too casual…that leaves what ?
The pieces finally came together in my mind, the same way a room design did if I gave my brain long enough to work it out.
I grabbed a hot pink lace cami from the floor and a flowing black sleeveless top from the closet door handle.
I partnered them with the tightest skinny jeans I owned and a pair of four-inch black wedges.
A look in the mirror had me brushing out my long blond hair one more time before grabbing my new necklace and a black clutch off my crowded dresser while my friends looked at me with something like to disbelief.
“You realize you were in sweats five minutes ago, right? How did you do that?” Kim asked.
“Right?” Liv asked. Livy’s deep red hair was curled perfectly at the ends, and meticulous eye make-up complemented her green eyes.
She sort of looked like Ariel from The Little Mermaid , and there was a distinct possibility that was why I had made it a point to invite her to sit at my lunch table when she moved to town sophomore year of high school.
“Practice, my friend, practice.”
“Okay, well let’s go. I don’t want to be late,” Kim complained. “And won’t you be cold?”
Always the voice of reason.
“Of course I’ll be cold, until I get Zack Rhodes to lend me his jacket.” I smiled, leading the way downstairs. “And yes, we do want to be late. How horrific would it be to arrive there before anyone else?”
Liv agreed with that last point, so Kimmy resigned herself to us driving the long way to Vader’s house. Fox Falls wasn’t exactly an expansive metropolis, so even the ‘long way’ took only took ten minutes.
“Hey, what’s Vader’s real name?” Kim mused. “Like, we don’t really know him…is it okay to call him that?”
I had been wondering the same, but I wasn’t about to admit it.
“Eh, I figure you can call a guy just about anything as long as you say it in the right way,” Livy said, shimmying in her seat a bit. “ You worry too much—ohmygod I LOVE this song!” she exclaimed without missing a beat, apparently ending that conversation with music blaring through her speakers.
I tried to tamp down the blip of jealousy that appeared on my radar at still not having my own car to blast my own music in.
You have your new project. It’s fine .
We pulled up to a house on the outskirts of campus, and there were vehicles already lining the road stretched out in front of it.
The smell of the bonfire air surrounded me as soon as I was clear of the car.
We had to walk down a moderately serious hill to get to the party, and I was rethinking my shoe choice.
If you fall and roll down this hill, that will be the end of you.
While there were a few familiar faces in the glow of the fire, it was mostly people I didn’t know. I followed Livy over to the coolers.
“And what can I get for you ladies this evening?” a voice asked when we walked up. A voice attached to a very tall, lanky guy with a devastating smile.
He’s almost too tall, I thought, craning my neck to look up at him.
“I’m Vader, by the way,” he said, grinning.
“Nice to meet you!” Kimmy said a little too quickly, a little too loudly.
“You too,” he laughed.
“I’d love a drink,” Liv said, blinking her long eyelashes up at him. “Whatever you recommend.”
I almost rolled my eyes, but I wasn’t really one to judge anyone else’s overt flirting at this point. I watched her take a pretty pink wine cooler from his outstretched hand.
“I guess I’ll be driving us home,” Kim muttered from behind her.
“Thanks, Kimmy. You’re the best,” Liv replied, clearly having heard every word .
I took something red and fruity looking too and made my way toward the fire. We gathered a few rogue lawn chairs and plopped down close enough to feel the heat. I hadn’t lied, I was fucking cold already. Twisting off the cap to the wine cooler, the scent of a liquid SweeTart hit my nose.
“Yeah, I would definitely not drink that,” an amused male voice chuckled very closely behind me. I lowered the drink and turned around slowly to find Zack, looking like he stepped out of and Abercrombie ad, wearing a dark blue hoodie and a well-worn backwards hat.
“Because…?” I asked with forced casualness. His expression was relaxed, and I was determined to hold my own as if I did this all the time. Livy had tuned into our not-quite-conversation and defiantly took a long sip of her drink.
“Because the sugar in that thing is going to make you feel like shit long before you have a buzz. I’ll get you a beer,” he offered directly to me, and I felt a rush of smugness come over me with his blatant disregard for Liv. “Bring your friends if you like.”
“Nah, we’re good here,” Liv insisted, practically holding Kim down by her wrist and giving me a not-at-all-subtle stare.
I let Zack help me up, taking in his dark brown hair curling slightly under his hat and his full lips turned up in a smile at me.
He didn’t drop my hand as we walked toward a keg.
His palm was warm against mine, and I wanted to memorize the anticipation I felt as he squeezed my hand.
He handed me a cup, and fear bubbled up in my chest as I realized I had no idea how to actually use a keg. I didn’t drink that often, despite what my almost-DUI might have suggested, and I definitely wasn’t out doing keg stands every weekend.
“Will you pour mine? I just did my nails.” I smiled sweetly, and he grinned back with his perfect white teeth and did as I asked.
“I’m glad you came out,” he stated, looking over at me .
“Yeah, well, small town, not a whole lot going on, ya know?” I said, desperately wanting to downplay that I’d done a happy dance in Liv’s car after he invited me.
“I hear ya. We have to make our own fun around here.” He nudged me playfully, and I felt my confidence swell. I took a sip of the beer he’d poured and managed to let it roll down my throat without a reaction. I hated beer.
Why does anyone choose to drink this? I wondered seriously, wishing I had the pretty drink back.
Quite a few people had shown up, and someone had backed a truck down the hill and added a beat to the party.
The music was not necessarily my style—a little rap-tastic for my normal taste—but I liked that Zack now needed to lean in to talk to me.
He was tall-ish, but not insanely so like Vader, and I imagined his arms would fit around me nicely.
He introduced me to some friends as we walked, and eventually we sat down on some uneven stumps set up around the bonfire to roast some hot dogs.