Elsie
Chapter Forty-Two
“Tell me the truth,” I said, kneeling on Will’s lap, staring into his eyes, my hands gripping his shoulders. “Are you mad?”
“I’m not mad.”
“I feel like you’re mad.”
“Why would I be mad?”
“Because I just spent the last two hours talking your ear off, and I know I usually do that during the day, but I feel like at night when you’re home, it’s like, your personal time and now I’m bothering you after hours, so I feel like it made you mad.”
“It did not make me mad.”
He looked serious, but I couldn’t be sure.
“Irritated, then?”
“No.”
“Frustrated?”
“No,” he said, hands tightening around my waist.
“But you didn’t have anything to say about any of it.” I frowned, trying to make sense of the conundrum.
He laughed. “Els, you didn’t give me a chance before you went off on a different tangent.”
“Oh,” I said. “Well, what do you think now?”
“I think that I don’t have any counter logic to your half hour spiel about how you think the Egyptian pyramids were built. But that didn’t mean I wasn’t fascinated by your theories.”
“Really?”
“Really,” he promised.
“So, do you agree then?
“I agree about the giant cranes, but I’m not sure about any curses on the tombs.”
“What!” I shrieked, nearly falling off him until he steadied me with his grip. “But the evidence is so compelling! Everyone who interferes with them dies a strange and unusual death!”
“That’s just human stupidity.” He shrugged. “Why are you smiling?”
“Because you really were listening to me.”
“Of course I was,” he told me. “I like listening to you talk.”
“It just doesn’t make sense.”
“Why not?”
“You like being alone.”
“I like being alone with you.”
“You like peace and quiet.”
“Your chatter is like white-noise to me.”
“Annoying and staticky?”
“Peaceful and relaxing.”
“Even when I’m asking you for help doing something stupid?”
“Especially then.”
“Will Hughes,” I stared into his eyes, wrapping my arms around his neck, “where have you been all my life?”
“Waiting for you to find me, I guess,” he said so simply, but I had to bite my lip to stop the smile that his words caused.
“But now it’s my turn to ask,” he said, “where have you been? What was your life like before?”
“Oh.” I deflated, crawling off him and sitting back against the couch. “It was uneventful. Nothing noteworthy.”
“I doubt that.” He frowned. “Come on, humor me.”
“Why?”
“Because I feel like I have a pretty good picture of who you are, I’m just missing the backstory component.”
“I don’t know, Will. I lived in Boston. I had a crappy apartment. My parents hated it. I had a crappy writing job. They hated that too.”
“Do you not get along with them?”
“Does anyone get along with their parents?”
“Yes?”
“Oh. Well, whatever.” I shrugged. “They’re fine.”
“Fine?”
“They just have certain ways of viewing the world,” I fumbled to explain. “A lot of our disconnect came from the fact that I had my own.”
“Doesn’t everyone have their own?”
“Not the people in their circle. That’s why they all get along with each other.” I picked at my nail, wishing we could talk about anything else other than my family.
I mean, I hadn’t even got into my Amelia Earhart spiel yet. Surely that was more interesting than the rundown of the Cameron family and their greatest disappointment: me.
“So, how do they view the world?” Will pressed.
“I don’t know.” I heaved a sigh. “For them, well, it’s either this or it’s that. It’s black, or it’s white. That type of mentality.”
“Are you being incredibly vague on purpose?”
“No, I just think I’m about to break out in hives if I have to talk about my parents any longer.” I turned my head slightly, embarrassed for him to see how affected I got over such a normal topic of conversation.
I mean, of course he’d want to know about my parents. That was a normal thing to know about someone you were dating.
Wait. Were we dating?
Geez, I was relieved I hadn’t said that out loud, because while I was very much into Will, I couldn’t be entirely sure if his head was in the same place as mine.
“I’m not trying to stress you out,” he said, reaching over to bring me closer. “I was just trying to figure out what caused that look on your face after talking to your mom this morning.”
I thought about telling him the truth, but figured the idea of his new…
girl he was seeing…being fresh out of a semi-arranged marriage that didn’t reach the altar might be slightly off-putting.
Especially considering it had only been twenty-four hours since Will and I had transitioned from friends to whatever this was.
And I liked whatever this was so much that I was scared to even ask exactly what it was.
“Hey,” Will said worriedly, apparently aware of whatever spiraling storm was brewing inside of me. “It’s okay, Els. We don’t have to talk about your family anymore.”
“Oh, no,” I told him. “It’s not that. Now I’m stressed about something different.”
“What? When did that happen?”
“Just now, in my head, when my thoughts went down the dark and twisty road they always managed to go down.” I faked a laugh.
“Tell me.”
“No, it’s kind of embarrassing.”
“When has that ever stopped you?”
“Well, I don’t know. Things are different now. Between us.”
“I thought that was a good thing.” He moved to tuck a piece of hair behind my ear.
“It is,” I said. “I’m just overthinking.”
“Well, I don’t want you to overthink us.” He looked concerned. “If something’s bothering you, we can talk about it.”
I guess I’d rather get it over with now than the possibility of continuing on like this for days or weeks or months and losing my nerve and becoming one of those people who were together, but not really together because they never defined their relationship.
“Can I ask you something?” I asked, biting my lip to fight the anxiety screaming at me to just leave well enough alone.
“Of course,” he said. “You can ask me anything.”
“Are you—I mean, are we—um,” I said, feeling a bit breathless as I tried to string together a coherent thought. Would asking the status of us after one day be the most blatantly clingy move in the world? “You know what? Never mind.”
“Elsie,” he said, tone commanding.
“Are we dating?” The words came out all in one tumble, and I instantly felt my face flame with embarrassment.
“See, that sounds stupid, doesn’t it?” I groaned, burying my face in my hands before I could see his reaction. “Oh, God. Forget I asked that. What am I? A girl with a poodle skirt and a milkshake, asking you to go steady with her? Ridiculous.”
“Elsie.”
“No, leave me here to rot in my shame. That was an awful thing to ask. I mean, it hasn’t even been twenty-four hours.”
“Elsie, would you please look at me?” he asked, tone gentle and tender.
“Why?” I peeked out between my fingers, watching as his hands came up to lower mine from my face.
“Because I want to answer your question.”
“Please don’t.” I tried to hide again, but he held my wrists firmly, forcing me to look at him.
“The thing is, I don’t really understand what all the lingo is, but to me, dating implies that we’d be hanging out, trying to see if we like each other,” he started. “But I already know I like you.”
“I like you too,” I whispered.
“That’s a relief,” he said. “Because I don’t want to date you. I want to be with you. Exclusively and long term. And whatever term applies to that, then that’s what I want.”
“Oh,” I said, feeling suddenly giddy at the thought of the man beside me saying all that to me.
“Oh?” he asked. “Come on, Els. I need something more than that.”
“Right. Sorry,” I said quickly, turning toward him before sitting into a crisscross position. “I was just overwhelmed because, well, I really like you, Will. Like, really, really like. Like, I think I’ve had a big, stupid crush on you for the last month, at least.”
“Just the last month?” he asked with a scoff. “I’ve been done for since that first day.”
“Nuh-uh.” I slapped his arm. “You hated me. I remember.”
“Did not.”
“Did too. But it’s okay, because I hated you too.”
“Hated me?” He barked a laugh. “That’s kind of harsh, Els.”
“Don’t you remember? You were a jerk to me.”
“Because I was pissed off that you infiltrated my brain without me having a say in it.”
I rolled my eyes dramatically before resting my head against his shoulder, my arm coming up to wrap around his bicep and hug it toward me.
“Fine,” I said. “Prove it then.”
“Prove what?”
“If you liked me right away, what’s the first thing you noticed about me?”
“Easy. Your hair.”
I shook my head. “Boring answer. Everyone says that. Pick something else.”
“But it’s the truth.”
“Don’t care. Make something up.”
“Fine, well. I guess the next thing I noticed was your hands. When I got up closer.”
“My hands?”
“Yeah. You had ink stains all over them, smudged on the sides of your fingers.”
I laughed, shocked that he actually noticed such a trivial thing about a stranger.
“Why on earth would you notice my hands?”
He paused.
“I was looking for a ring,” he said, almost abashedly. “To see if you were married.”
Silence fell over us, but not for the reason he thought.
“I’m sorry,” he said quickly. “I didn’t mean to freak you out. It was just a—I don’t know, I hope you don’t think I had ulterior motives right off the bat or something—”
“No, no,” I reassured. “No, it’s not that. It’s just…” I trailed off, biting my lip as if I could keep the words in. How if he’d met me two weeks earlier, I would’ve had a ring on my hand.
But I just couldn’t bring myself to say it.
So, I deflected.
“It’s just that the first thing I noticed about Ava was the ring on her hand. So, really, you’re not so weird at all.”
He let out a huff of a laugh, but I heard the relief in it.
“Oh, yeah. With the size of hers, I’m surprised you didn’t see it from Boston. Matthew was paying that thing off for three years.”
There it was. The mention of his brother had the wheels in my brain turning with curiosity. Was it overstepping to ask what went down all those years ago? Would it be too soon to prod into the intricacies of his family drama?
“You have something to say,” Will noted immediately.
“How the hell do you always know that?”
“Because you open your mouth like you’re about to ask, and then the words don’t come out. You look like a goldfish.”
I swatted at him again.
“A cute goldfish.”
“I guess I just wanted to ask you why sometimes I’ve noticed a weird vibe between you and Ava.”
“I hate the word vibe,” Will said, but the way his body went rigid told me there was a lot more to the story than just town gossip.
“Okay,” I humored him, “let me rephrase. Sometimes, there’s a decidedly hostile air between you and your sister-in-law, and I’ve always been curious as to why that is. Better?”
“Look, I know what you’re talking about, and things have definitely been bad the last few months, but Ava and I actually came to sort of an understanding. I think it will be better now.”
“Okay, but that doesn’t explain why everyone in town seems to think something major went down between you and her at your brother’s wedding.”
“What?” He went rigid. “Who said that?”
“I’ve just heard it around.” I shrugged, not wanting to get Theo into trouble. “But the way you’re reacting makes me think there’s some truth to it.”
“I’m reacting this way because people in this town are nosy as hell to still be talking about something that happened five years ago.”
“So, something did happen?”
“Yes,” he gritted out, reluctant in a way that made me burn to know more.
“Are you going to tell me?”
“It’s not worth talking about. I promise you that.”
“You weren’t in love with her, or anything, were you?” I held my breath, waiting for the answer.
“No,” he said finally.
“But you hesitated,” I pointed out, voice sounding small and fragile. “Am I close?”
“Elsie, please. I really, really don’t want to talk about this.” He sucked in a weary breath. “Maybe someday, but not tonight.”
“But—”
“Elsie.” Suddenly he was over me, kissing right below my ear before whispering, “There’s so many other things I’d rather do than go over something that’s ancient history.”
“You’re trying to distract me,” I noted, arching my neck up to give him better access to the spot he was trailing his way down.
“Is it working?”
“For now.”
“Works for me.”
And then, suddenly, I didn’t really feel the need for any more conversation.