Chapter Seven #2
My heart tripping in my chest, my mind whirring, I forgot
all about grabbing the book Liam called to tell me he forgot for school and
marched up the stairs, straight to my son’s room.
They knew I was there. I knew it when I stood in the doorway
and stared at them staring at me.
Darius, Lee and Eddie.
My son’s Transformer décor was in boxes in the hallway. His
furniture had plastic over it. The walls were mostly painted a pretty, but
masculine, blue. And there was a plethora of Target and Dillard’s bags outside,
not to mention a queen mattress resting up against the wall and a new,
dismantled bedframe still bound in its delivery protective wrap leaned against
it.
Where Liam’s twin bed was, I didn’t know. Just his dresser
and desk were under the plastic wrap.
I ignored Eddie and Lee, looked to Darius, and ordered, “My
room. Now.”
I also ignored Eddie and Lee glancing at each other, lips
quirking.
I marched to my bedroom.
I stood, holding the door, until Darius walked through it.
I slammed it behind him.
“So, five years, you’ve still been letting yourself in and
checking things out,” I said with false calm.
“Malia, he’s growing up, and he’s got a little kid room.
He’s gotta have a growing man’s room.”
“So you decided just to show up with your buds and make that
happen without speaking to me?”
“It’s been a while,” he said cautiously, “so I see I gotta
remind you that me stayin’ away—”
“Fuck that!” I shouted.
His brows drew low. “Calm down,” he growled.
“Fuck calm too,” I retorted. “You can’t waltz in here and
give your boy everything he wants—”
“Wrong,” he bit off and stabbed a finger at the wall through
which, beyond the guest bedroom and the upstairs bathroom was our son’s room. “Seein’ as that’s what I’m doing right fuckin’ now.”
“You made the decision it was nothing but envelopes and cash
and no promises,” I reminded him. “That wasn’t me.”
“It was the hardest decision I’ve made in my goddamned
life.”
“Seems like it was easy to me.”
“Yeah?” he grunted, eyes flashing with rage.
“Yeah,” I replied fake easily, swinging a hand out in front
of me for good measure, then settling it on my hip.
Darius watched my hand move, then his eyes sliced to my
face.
I glared at him.
He scowled at me.
For the life of me, I couldn’t say who made the first move.
Though, I thought it was the both of us.
I went at him.
He came at me.
He was bigger, stronger. He had me up against the wall and
then we were kissing and tearing at each other’s clothes.
I couldn’t tell you who gave up on the clothes-tearing thing
first either, but I again thought it was the both of us.
He’d yanked up my skirt and pulled down my panties.
I stepped out of them at the same time I unzipped his jeans.
My blouse was half unbuttoned and his tee was misshapen, but
we left them as they were.
I reached in, pulled him out and stroked…long and tight.
He groaned and I gasped when he lifted me up.
He pinned me to the wall then drilled into me.
My head flew back and hit wall.
Yes.
He thrust and grunted, “Mouth, baby.”
I bent my neck, gave him my mouth, and wrapped him up with
my arms and legs and held tight as Darius fucked me into the wall.
Eventually, all he was giving me overwhelmed me, and I tore
my mouth from his.
“Harder,” I begged.
“Can’t,” he gritted.
“Harder,” I demanded.
“Can’t, baby. I’m close.”
“Har—”
I cut myself off, whimpering and moaning through a sharp,
sweet, long, beautiful orgasm. He went harder, faster, drawing out my climax,
then he tucked his face in my neck and groaned, long and low.
I had my cheek against his temple, was fiddling with one of
his short twists in my fingers and taking him in. His spicy, earthy smell. His
strength surrounding me. His big cock still buried deep.
He moved his head so his lips were at my ear.
“He needs a growing man’s room,” he whispered there.
“Okay,” I replied.
His arms around me got tight. “Fuck, I miss you.”
I closed my eyes, and it was me who shoved my face in his
neck.
It took me a second to build up the courage, but I did it
and then it was also my turn to put my lips to his ear.
“Whenever you’re ready, however long it takes, we’re waiting
for you.”
“Don’t,” he grunted, the word hoarse, raw.
“Baby, you’re giving him the room he’s been begging me for.
You don’t think it’s true. But you prove it. Over and over again. You’re worth
waiting for.”
He pulled me off him, dropped me to my feet but held me to
the wall until my legs were steady under me.
He also tugged down my skirt.
Only when I was standing on my own power did he step back
and tuck himself away.
He didn’t look at me.
“I know what you do,” I shared.
His head snapped up and his gaze pierced mine.
“And I don’t like it,” I said. “But I understand why you do
it. And we’ll be waiting for when you’re done doing that too.”
He said nothing, just stood there looking into my eyes.
I said nothing more either, just stood there, drinking in
the man I adored.
Then he made a move to go.
When he had his hand on the doorknob, I called out, “I love
you.”
He turned to me then and said, “You’re beautiful. You’re
crazy. You’re too damned loyal. And you’re a huge pain in my ass.”
I smiled at him.
He shook his head.
And then he was gone.
It wasn’t long after the incident against the wall in my
bedroom when I found myself in the underground parking of an office building on
15th Street in LoDo.
I knew he showed because the cameras I saw everywhere caught
me leaning against the door of my car and someone at Nightingale Investigations
headquarters told him I was there.
Nightingale Investigations being Lee Nightingale’s private
detective agency.
Where Darius now worked.
This was not something Darius told me.
Oh no.
It was something Tony shared with me, seeing as he was
surprised Darius had turned his back on the life that had kept him away from me
and our son, and we were not together.
One could say, when I learned this, I was surprised too.
But that was only a very small part of what learning this
knowledge made me feel.
Hence, why I was standing right there.
But I didn’t move when he showed.
I didn’t because I was drowning in sorrow, in
disappointment. So much, I didn’t even have it in me to feel rage.
He stopped in front of me.
“Malia,” he greeted.
“You’re out,” I stated flatly.
“Malia—”
“You got out, you’ve been out for a while, and you didn’t
come to us.”
“You don’t understand.”
“No, I don’t. And that’s tired, Darius Tucker. And you know
it.”
“You think my boy wants an ex-drug dealer as his dad?”
He asked that, and he wasn’t done talking.
But I was done listening.
“I think it’s clear you don’t have the balls to find out.”
His head jerked like I’d slapped him.
But…
Fuck that.
It was official.
It had been a good run.
But I was clean out of patience.
I said what I had to say.
I got in my car, started it up and drove away.
Darius, no surprise, didn’t try to stop me.
“Someone kill me,” I said to myself as I drove up my
driveway and saw Lee Nightingale and Eddie Chavez sitting in the cute, wicker
chairs on my front porch.
I’d already hit the remote, so I drove right into the
garage.
I then hit the remote to close the door, but I knew this
wasn’t something I could avoid.
So I didn’t.
I went into the house, dropped my bag and attaché, and no
matter that I was dying to kick them off, I didn’t take off my pumps, because
going up against those two, I’d need my height, even if it came in a three-inch
stiletto heel and they’d both still tower over me. So I kept them on and headed
to the front door to let them in.
I said nothing, just walked to the kitchen and put the
island between them and me.
They followed me but barely came into the room.
I’d seen the newspaper articles. I’d bought but hadn’t read
the book.
I knew they were semi-famous. Also that Lee and Indy had
finally gotten together (and I was glad for both of them) and Eddie had found
his own woman, a lady named Jet.
But I didn’t figure they were there to catch up.
I started it.
“I know why you’re here.”
“No, you don’t,” Eddie replied.
“He had chance after chance,” I informed him.
“No offense, Malia, but this isn’t about you. It isn’t about
Darius. It’s about Liam,” Lee reminded me.
That shut me up.
“He’s nearly grown now. He’s a smart kid. And he can make a
mature decision,” Lee said.
“He’s sixteen,” I pointed out.
“You got pregnant with him at sixteen, decided to keep him
and…” he looked around, and really needed to say no more.
Yes, I had Darius’s help, but even if I hadn’t, we’d have
been just fine.
Because I’d made my decision determined to be a good momma
and give my son a good life.
And with the help of loving family and friends, I’d done
that.
But I’d decided it at sixteen.
“I’ve already asked him if he wants to meet his dad,” I told
them.
“When?” Eddie asked.
I bit my lip.
Eddie sighed and quietly urged, “Ask him again.”
I opened my mouth.
But Eddie beat me to it.
“He won’t forgive himself. For the decisions he made. The
things he’s done. He’s buried deep under that shit. He left that life behind,
and it wasn’t easy, extricating himself from all that. But he did it. Though,
he’s still mired in it. He needs forgiveness. He needs redemption.”
“He needs to be reminded that he was always who his father
raised him to be,” Lee put in. “He made some shit decisions and did some shady
things. But he’s always been Darius.”
He’s always been Darius.
I held no hope for me. I was thirty-three years old, and I’d
given the last seventeen years of my life to a ghost.
But I was also a mother.
And if I could give my boy what he deserved to have in this
life, I was going to do it.
“I’ll talk to Liam.”
Eddie’s dimple popped out.
Lee smiled the famous Lee Nightingale smile.