Chapter 13
Jodi Castle
Lee pulled Jodi off her knees and dragged her into the bus lounge. They all knew too well what Nash was like when he was pissed off, and currently he was at the mighty end of that scale. The sound of the bolt being thrown turned both their heads.
“Hey,” Balin protested, and banged his fist against the door. He was still stark bollock naked apart from his socks, his clothes somewhere on the floor of the bunk room.
In a surprising show of sense, Jez ushered the ladies that they’d been entertaining off the bus, while Lee backed Jodi onto one of the banquettes. She sat heavily, bruising her arse on a stray beer can.
Stupid…stupid…stupid…
What had she done? How did she make this right?
Balin began raking amongst the bits of discarded clothing on the floor, and turned up a T-shirt, possibly Nash’s.
No, Jez’s. Who took it straight off him and handed him a hoodie instead.
Who that belonged to was anyone’s guess.
It made him less distracting, but still meant he was flashing his naked butt cheeks left, right, and centre.
Lee stood before her rubbing the knuckle of his thumb against his lips. “Tell me if I have this right. Despite being engaged to Nash, you’ve started something with Rock Giant, the bass player of the band we’re supposed to be supporting on a world tour?”
She swallowed the hard lump in her throat, but her voice still came out hoarse.
“I haven’t started anything. Nash ditched me last night to watch you lot fornicate.
I might have reacted a little irresponsibly in response and got a tiny bit…
wasted.” She wasn’t about to admit she’d been tripping her arse off on magic mushrooms to them all.
It was easier to let them believe she’d drunk too much.
Excess drinking they’d be less judgy over. Maybe.
“So, what was all that shit about a handfasting?” Balin asked. She couldn’t look him in the face, but the sight of his hairy legs and Mr Tickle socks made her want to giggle. That, and had she really just seen him fucking some woman?
God, they were all disappointed with her. She hadn’t just fucked things up with Nash, she’d dented her relationship with the rest of the Ghost Boys, too. If Nash dumped her over this, they’d ditch her, too.
“Nash arranged for the pair of us to get handfasted up at the standing stones last night.”
“No one invited us.”
“It was supposed to be a romantic thing between the two of us, before the official exchange of vows. We were supposed to meet there at quarter to eleven... or midnight.” Whatever. “Except, he didn’t come.”
“Oh, he came plenty,” Jez remarked flippantly from the other end of the seating.
“Not helping, pal.” Lee levelled a scowl at him. “And don’t muddy things unnecessarily. Nash didn’t cheat on you, Jo. Can you say the same?”
“Fuck you.” Fuck him for even suggesting she’d been unfaithful. “I didn’t sleep with Rock Giant if that’s what you think.” Well, technically, she had slept with him, or at least next to him, but she…they hadn’t shagged one another. At least, not last night.
“What are we supposed to think? Seems clear cut from where I’m standing. Nash allegedly failed to show, so you retaliated by buddying up with Black Halo’s bass player and made pretty promises to him instead. There’s no way that went down without some action.”
It hadn’t been like that. Actually, it hadn’t been anything like that. What he said implied pre-meditation, and there’d been none. It’d all been the very opposite of that.
“I’m not proud of what I’ve done, Lee, but I’m no cheat.
What happened is that I got wasted. Same as any of you would have done in that situation.
Ever been stood up? It sucks. Now imagine it wasn’t just any date; it was a fucking significant date.
The person you’re fucking engaged to and are supposed to be spending the rest of your life with, stood you—he stood me up. ”
She guessed her words hit home, because sympathy started creeping into their expressions. “I don’t even remember what happened properly.”
An ever-increasing number of snapshots were coming back to her, enough to piece a line of events together, beginning with Rock Giant kissing her, and ending with them constructing that ridiculous bird’s nest to sleep in.
“I know I’ve fucked up big time when drunk.
” To her surprise, Balin flopped down beside her and leaned his head over until it met her shoulder.
“Nash’ll calm down eventually, and it’s not like you made out with the guy or actually tied the knot with him.
” He laced his fingers with hers and gave her hand a squeeze.
Actually, tying the knot was precisely what she’d done, but she got what he meant.
“So, you just need to stay away from him.”
Yeah, who was going to keep Rock Giant away from her? To him, those vows they’d made were apparently eternal.
“Really it’s just like the pair of you role-played getting hitched.”
Kinda. But not really.
“I’ll talk to him,” Jez offered. She wasn’t entirely sure who he meant to speak to until he moved towards the backroom door.
Right, Nash, not Rock Giant. Good, because frankly she was probably better off handling Rock Giant herself.
Sitting him down, and having a nice, sensible, adult conversation with him.
Once she made sure he really understood what was at stake, then maybe they could figure something out like the grown-ups they allegedly were.
She’d never felt less like a responsible adult.
But nor did she want this to turn into a high-school drama with people being jerks to one another and assaulting one another in grimy bathrooms.
Lee intercepted their drummer. “Sit back down, Jez. Nash’s better left to stew. If you try to reason with him now, it’ll just make it worse.”
Jez pitched a sigh in the direction of the door. “I’d rather he didn’t trash the place and land us with some bollocks bill for the damages. We’re not made yet, guys.”
It seemed to her they’d managed to trash the place successfully already. She wasn’t about to make that point though.
“The worst he can do in there is massacre a few pillows.” Balin gave her hand another squeeze. “He did miss you last night, Jo-Jo. He made us all swoop by your tent to try and find you, and he asked that security bird and Brian about your whereabouts.”
It sucked some of the hurt out of her to know Nash had hunted for her. And the handfasting had been a maybe, not a definite.
“Said he was going to carry you back here and roll you onto his bunk.”
“That’s what we were gonna do?” Jez said. “I thought we were going to have a Valencia style snugglefest. Remember those?”
She did. Back when the digs they were staying in had accommodation that consisted of one enormous bed, and a bunch of cribs that were barely long enough for her, let alone the guys to sleep comfortably on.
There’d been many a night when they’d all crashed together on the big bed, snuggled up, legs entwined, no covers because their combined body heat was more than enough to keep them all cosy.
It hadn’t been sexual. Just friendly. Although, looking back, she guessed Nash had always managed to wind up spooning her.
She missed those times. Missed the closeness, and how they’d been like a family.
It’d been like having four—five with Rune—big brothers who gave a shit about her, the total opposite of her relationship with her actual brothers.
Nash putting a ring on her finger had kinda tempered all that.
Stopped the late-night chats with Jez and Lee snuggled together under a blanket, and the early morning ones with Rune.
Maybe things hadn’t changed so much with Balin.
He still licked her if he wanted to, and licked Nash too if he dared to protest. But she hadn’t minded the changes too much.
Except if things truly went tits for up them what would happen, would she lose all the guys as well as Nash… Lose her family?
“You’ve gone awful pale,” Jez observed.
The three of them peered at her closely.
“Need some rescue remedy?” Lee asked.
She shook her head. “I’m really sorry, guys. I know how jizzed up you all were about touring with Black Halo, and now I’ve gone and fucked it all up for you.”
Balin punched her in the thigh. “Hey, less of the past tense. We’re still hitting the road with them. What’s a bit of fucking between friends, right?”
Lee slapped him around the back of the head. “She didn’t fuck him.”
“Hey! All right. She didn’t fuck him, but come on, we’re looking at this the wrong way. Shared experiences are how friends are made. It’s something we can all bond over.”
Neither Lee or Jez seemed convinced, and while Balin’s optimism was endearing, Jodi couldn’t see things working out that way either.
Black Halo certainly hadn’t shown signs of seeing the funny side while she’d been on their bus, and it was more likely that Nash would attempt to chew Rock Giant’s face off than laugh about it over a pint.
She’d fucked up.
Completely and thoroughly.
Just like she always did.
Best thing she could probably do right now was get the hell out of here and hope they managed to pick the pieces up.
“I ought to feed my cats, guys.”
Excuse meet reality. There was nothing to be gained by sitting here. It could be hours before Nash emerged. Days… He’d come out for their set later, wouldn’t he? But would he want to see her right before that? Probably not.
“I’ll walk you back,” Lee offered. It didn’t take him long to do so.
He stuck around while she fed the kitties and let them stretch their legs.
Even went and filled up her water carrier.
She wished he’d stop being so nice. It made her feel twice as bad about how she’d fucked things up for them all.
Maybe it’d be okay, like Balin suggested, but it was just as likely that it’d all go tits up.
“You should be on the bus, not sleeping over here on your own. It’s not very safe.”
Now didn’t seem like the right moment to be making that move. Not when the chances were high that Nash would chuck her straight back off and demand his ring back too. She said as much to Lee.
“He loves you, Jodi. That’s why he’s pissed off. He’s not going to end things with you. He won’t—”
“Jez broke up with Rune, and what did he do?”
Lee gave a sad sigh. “Nash isn’t Jez. It’s going to be fine, Jo. You know what he’s like. He always goes up like a rocket but give it an hour or so and he’ll be back to his usual self.”
Maybe. She could only hope. If only everything else would miraculously be back to normal by then too. Maybe the rest of Black Halo would talk some sense into Rock Giant. Make him see that it’d be best all round if he just forgot about the whole knot tying, vows thing.
She could dream, right?
After Lee left, she found some fresh clothes and ate some peanut butter out of the jar, and a banana that was two days past its best. Stomach, at least quelled in terms of its rumblings for food, but not remotely relieved of the acute case of anxiety butterflies, she curled up on her camping mat and pulled her sleeping bag over herself for comfort.
God, you’re such a screw up, woman. If it all implodes, it’s your own damn fault for being such an idiot.