Chapter 36
The biggest damn library
Oliver
“Looks like your due date will be about November fourth.” The ultrasound lady pulls away the probe and tucks Sophia’s gown down.
I’m fixated on the still frame she has on the screen.
A black and white set of shapes that I can’t understand, but I saw the heartbeat of my child.
When she hands me the warm curled paper images, I can’t stop staring at them.
Ours.
“We’re all done, everything looks great. Go ahead and get dressed, then we’ll see you back in a few weeks.” She smiles, turning off the machine, and leaves.
Sophia looks up at me from the stretcher, tears shimmering on her cheeks. “Why does it feel more real now?”
I help her up, then pull her close before she gets dressed. Wrapping her tightly, I just want to hold her until she knows I’m here with her.
The tension is slow to melt from her shoulders, but when she finally sags against me, I press my lips to her temple. “We got this.”
By the time we get to the truck, I can tell she’s lost in her own head.
“Soph? Are you okay?” Squeezing her thigh makes her glance up from the vacant stare she had out the window.
“Oliver? Why did Paige…do what she did? I know we talked about red flags in the past, but now that I know who—” She diverts to tracing my knuckles.
“—I mean, do you think you had a part in it? Because you seem pretty perfect.” When she looks up, I can see the shine of more tears gathering on her lower lids.
I take a deep breath and let it out. “That’s a fair question.” My jaw tics at the realization that Paige is, once again, making strife for me.
“I met her at a party. We both got tipsy and messed around, then I didn’t see her again. Not until weeks later when she told me she was—” I swallow hard.
I don’t even want to compare Paige and Sophia.
“Pregnant,” Sophia finishes for me.
After a moment, I nod. “She wasn’t. But by the time I had figured that out, I had already committed to her. I thought I was doing the right thing.”
“She hated where I lived. At first she wanted to move to Missoula. Then California. Didn’t want kids, so she stayed on birth control and made me jacket up.” I let out a rueful laugh. “I think the part I was most excited about was being a dad.”
Sophia snuggles into my side. “I think you’re going to be a great one.”
That makes a burst of warmth sear through my chest.
“I work long hours, Soph. In the summertime, sometimes I’m on sixteen, even twenty hour days when we’re on a project. Then when I got home, I’m sure all I talked about was moving dirt or roping.” I remember the arguments with Paige.
She wanted to go out all the time. Bars, clubs, concerts.
And added a new wardrobe every other month.
“I got tired of burning at both ends trying to keep her happy, so she started going out without me. Then I think she liked the attention she was getting since I wasn’t there.
I’m boring, Soph. When it really comes down to it, I’d rather sit at home with some half-burned mozzarella sticks, a good book, or a horseback ride around the property.
” Reaching over, I entwine my fingers in hers.
“I just want you to know, my favorite thing in the world has become those moments in the mornings, when we’re both awake, and I can just hold you wrapped against me. ”
I lift her thumb to my lips, feeling the burn of grief trying to take over.
“My mom would have reading days when we were kids. All three of us would find a story and sit in the living room with a fresh plate of cookies, existing in our own little worlds for a few hours. Those quiet memories? They’re what I want. ”
Her tears soak into my shirt when she burrows against me.
“My mom used to read to us every night,” she sniffles.
“After she died, Dad tried. He worked a lot too. I understand that he does it because he loves us. He couldn’t always be there, so he made sure we had all the books we wanted.
” Sophia tilts her head to reveal her puffy eyes, yet a smile tugs up her mouth.
“When he’d get home in the evening, he’d make us a cup of tea before bed and ask us about what they were about. ”
She really gets it.
It makes me love her even more.
Her lip quivers, rolling between her teeth and drooping into a frown. “Ollie? I can’t wait until we can do that for our kids. Is it weird I’m not even upset that I won’t finish the competition season? I’d rather be with you.”
“I’m going to build you the biggest damn library,” I groan.
She giggles, then presses my thigh to raise high enough to give me a soft kiss on the side of my chin. “Can we start with some cheese sticks? Now that you’ve mentioned them, I’m starving.”
“We’re almost to Hilltop. Want to stop, get lunch, and you can say ‘hi’ to your brother?” I have to pass it anyways on the way home.
“Oh, yes please. I haven’t seen him since that day.” Her eyes get brighter as I turn into the parking lot. “I wonder if they know Val’s due date yet? Oh my god, wouldn’t it be crazy if they were the same?”
I’m more concerned about how her brother will react when he actually sees Sophia and I together.
It’s one thing to develop a working relationship where he’s always been reserved because of the rift Sophia had with me.
Let’s hope he’s as understanding as Mason.
Sophia tugs me in by my hand with a triumphant grin on her face.
“This is better than winning any silly ribbon at the rodeo,” she whispers, wrapping her palm around my elbow.
I’m the happiest man alive knowing she feels that way.
“Val!” Sophia squeals, letting go of me to run towards the maroon-topped bartender. “When are you due?” she asks as she crushes Val to her in a big hug.
“It’s fucking karma,” Val laughs, eying me over Sophia’s shoulder. “Halloween of all days.”
“November fourth. Can you wait for me? We should deliver together.” Sophia backs up, reaching for me as Sawyer steps from the swinging door of the kitchen, wiping his hands on a towel.
“I don’t think it works that way, Soph,” he mutters.
His gaze is definitely sharper when he focuses on where her hand rests on me.
“Oliver, can we have a word?” he says roughly.
“Sawyer, be nice.” Sophia clings tighter to me.
“I will.” His blue eyes, so much like his sister’s, narrow at me.
Then he nods curtly towards the outside door.
“It’s fine, Soph.” I disengage from her snug hold and follow him.
Whatever it is, he needs to get it out so we can move on.
The bell above the frame marks our departure, the chime barely fading out of the cool spring air before Sawyer has whipped around.
“I know she can be sweet and sour, but she’s been cranky with you a hell of a lot longer than nice.
Did you plan all this? It is some sort of long prank that you’re doing to try and get back at her for something?
” He waves the white cloth between us before tucking the corner into the rear pocket of his jeans.
Then he crosses his arms over his chest, reminding me more of Dixon than Mason.
He might be quite a bit younger than me, but he looks like he could be scrappy as shit if he wanted to fight.
“No prank. She’s the one who reached out to me to start, long before I knew who she was.” I lift my palms in some sort of hope it keeps him calm.
“I have never seen her dislike someone as much as she did you.” His finger jabs out, dangerously close to landing on me. “I ain’t one to just standby and let someone close to me get hurt.”
“I love her, Sawyer.” My gaze doesn’t waver. “More than anything. I know it sounds crazy, but I’ve known her. Her dreams, her fears, and her secrets, long before I even knew it was her.”
His arm drops while he squints at me. “Did you fuck around on Paige?” He keeps his voice low, but I can hear the threat under it.
“Not even once. Not even a little bit. I’m as stubborn as an old mule when it comes to that. Sophia will have me for as long as she wants me.” I swear these twins have some sort of psychic link.
Both of them are questioning me about the same thing in short order.
I’ll tell them over and over.
She’s the one for me and I’ll do anything to make her happy.
Sawyer’s lower lip sticks out, appraising me like he’s on a grand jury.
“Just for the record—” His shoulders relax. “—there’s a lot of room to hide bodies at Black Gulch.” Then his mouth tilts in a smile and he reaches out to slap my arm. “Until then, welcome to the family.”
Swiveling on his boot heel, he opens up the entrance and waits for me to go in.
“You okay?” Sophia mouths from her stool at the bar.
I nod, sliding into the seat next to her. “I think y’all have some serious initiation rites though. I have never been threatened this many times in a week.”
It kinda makes me chuckle knowing how protective the McCullough’s are.
Sophia lets out a bit sigh, rolling those pretty blue eyes.
“Like a cowboy mafia, huh? I could have told him it was a waste of time.” Her fingers spread over my thigh far enough that her pinky brushes my crotch.
“But I guess, since you’re upright—” She leans closer, feathering her lips over my throat. “—you passed.”
The only person in the world who would ever consider standing up with me is Brent.
Yet somehow, I think that once Sophia and I are married, there’s a whole ass Black Gulch clan who would fight to the death for me.
And I would for them.