Chapter Seventy-Two
Jane could not sleep. It had occurred to her, quite suddenly, that it would be terribly, terribly wrong to marry Mr. Bingley and then immediately present him with a demand for three thousand pounds!
He would hate her forever as a fortune hunter, and who could blame him? How had she not realised this before?
She could imagine the look on his face, the disappointment in his beautiful, clear, honest blue eyes! She would never be able to convince him that she had married him for love, and their lives together would be miserable.
No, she would rather not marry him at all!
For it would be horrible to marry him and then have him look at her with disdain forever after.
Let him find someone who could marry him without needing to ask for money!
As difficult as this was, Jane knew she should go to London at once and try her luck there.
Better not to marry for love at all than to marry for love and have it immediately turn sour!
She would have liked to write to Lizzy right then and there, to pour her sorrow and disappointment and anger out on paper, but she was no longer permitted to use candles for anything other than emergencies, so it would have to wait until morning.