12. Olivia
12
OLIVIA
I get clothes for all of the girls that are still here. Elle is here with Tiffany, but Tiana seems to be missing, so I sent her a text inviting her over. I feel like she has been kidnapped by the guy she met at the bar, but I don’t know if I can even call it that.
The girls are all lying on the couch, watching TV and exhausted. I feel numb because it feels like it’s my fault that this happened at the club.
Bell is here still, babying all of us and tucking us in with my hoard of blankets that I like to collect.
Madeline is fast asleep in her bassinet in our room with the baby monitor on, so we can hear her if she wakes up.
Trixie is out for the count with her head lying on the arm of the couch. There is a knock at the front door, and I unlock it to let in Leah. “When did you get home?” I ask her as she hugs me tight.
“Earlier, and I heard there was trouble.” I wince at that, not liking that this is all happening because of me, even though realistically it’s not my fault, but that doesn’t stop the feelings of guilt from surfacing.
Tiffany runs over and hugs her tight next. “I missed you! How long will you be home?” she asks, and Leah grins back at her. “I’m done. I’m tired of living on the road, and I want to be home with my family.”
Tiffany squeals with happiness and I grin at the happy moment. I move to the couch and plop down next to Elle. “You okay?” she asks me, hugging me loosely.
I nod. “I do feel guilty, because it’s like I dragged you all into this.”
Trixie rises from the dead, literally sitting up like out of a horror movie to glare at me, and I try not to laugh at how ridiculous her hair looks with it smushed to one side.
Her sleepy eyes are directed straight at me and I cover my mouth, the laugh wanting to burst free. “You don’t blame yourself because a man has short dick syndrome. He was a bitch, and it’s not your fault.” She wags her finger at me before grabbing her blanket closer under her chin and falling back to sleep almost instantly.
Bell is full-on laughing. She walks over and tries to smooth Trixie’s hair out of her face but she just ends up making it worse.
“We have a ton of guest rooms if anyone wants to go crash in a bed.” At that, Trixie points her finger in the air, taking her blanket and walking up the stairs.
“She is just like her mother.” Bell laughs out loud, and I have to agree. I have heard the story of how Jean found out her ex was cheating on her—she beat her ex and his mistress both up with a huge-ass dildo.
She is epic, just like Tiana’s mom who is super badass. And so is Bell’s daughter River who is neck and neck with Shaylin.
Ronny’s mom sits down on the other side of me on the couch. “Sweetheart, it’s not your fault. You are not responsible for someone else’s actions.”
I lean over and rest my head on her shoulder; she is what a mother should be like. She is an angel, I love her, and she has always been so kind to me.
I’m not sure how much time has passed when we are woken up by the sound of bikes pulling up into the driveway.
I sit up and look around the room to the clock, noting we have been asleep for a couple of hours. I yawn and look at the small screen on the monitor to see if Madeline is still asleep, when the door opens.
In walks Ronny, Maverick, Christopher, and Carter, which confuses me—why would he be here if Arabella didn’t come with us? “Trixie here?”
My mouth opens in an O shape, and I school my features. “She is upstairs in one of the guest rooms, asleep.”
He rubs the back of his head like he wants to ask something but is scared to, and I look at Ronny who is grinning. “Brother, you can go stay with her. I didn’t know she was yours.” He gives Carter the go-ahead.
Carter chuckles. “Trust me, I have tried to tell her, and it went over her head,” he confesses, and I burst out laughing, thinking of the way she rose up off the couch to glare at me.
“Good luck!” I tell him as he walks up the stairs.
“Come on, girls, I will drop you off at home,” Maverick tells Tiffany and Leah.
Bell makes sure to hug the two of us before leaving me and Ronny alone.
The silence is almost creepy as Ronny takes my hand and drags me up the stairs. I can’t fight the urge to look into the guest bedroom on the way to ours to see Trixie hanging halfway off the bed, while Carter looks down at her, shaking his head. He looks over at us, smiling as he carefully lifts her, settling her in the middle of the mattress. She peeks one eye open at him and lifts her hand, wiggling her fingers at him.
They’re total opposites and I love that for them.
I shake Ronny’s hand loose then peek back into the room one last time to see him climbing into the bed beside her. Be still my heart.
Ronny rolls his eyes at me, but I can’t help it. We go into our room, locking the door behind us so no one accidentally walks in.
Madeline is fast asleep in her bassinet. Ronny walks into the bathroom and I hear the shower turn on.
It hits me that he didn’t ask me to join him or really love on Madeline. Something is wrong.
I hurry into the bathroom to see him under the spray, washing his body like he is trying to wash away a memory.
I strip out of my clothes, too, and open the shower door to step in with him. Then I throw my hair up in a bun, so it doesn’t get wet.
“Ronny?” I say softly, getting his attention. I press my front to his back, wrapping my arms around him. “What’s the matter? What happened?” I ask.
He turns around to face me, cupping my cheek. He doesn’t say anything, it’s almost like he is trying to think of the right words to say.
“You’re starting to scare me.” I can feel the tears starting to form behind my eyes.
I do know that the MC men are intense when it comes to servicing their form of justice and that jail is not usually an option, so I have an idea.
Ronny runs his hand over his face then over his hair. “Elliot has been using his job to sell off kids to this hippie commune.”
I gasp dramatically, thinking about how all of those kids already had a rough go of it and they’re the most vulnerable. This is really bad.
“Oh my God! No, he didn’t.”
He nods. “Well, the gang members were the middlemen between him and the hippie communes. He gave the kids to them and then they brought them to the hippie commune.”
I cover my mouth, trying not to cry out in disbelief that this has been happening.
“Elliot couldn’t keep up with the demand. I really don’t want to tell you the rest because it’s going to hurt you, angel.”
I close my eyes, resting my head on his chest before nodding. “Go ahead and tell me. I need to know.”
He growls, holding me tight to him like he can stop the hurt from getting to me. “He told them that his wife would help him keep up with the demand. Then he started stealing some of your cases.”
My heart shatters, I feel like I can’t breathe. He told them I was his wife, so they were really there for me. “He made a deal where if he couldn’t get them the girls then you would pay, he told them you had the money.”
I close my eyes, hating that Elliot has betrayed me in this way. I knew I got bad vibes from him but I never dreamed that he would do something like this. I thought he was just a nerdy guy that didn’t know how to speak to girls.
“What if I hadn’t been able to pay that debt, Ronny?” I know I’m not going to like the answer.
“They were there to get you to pay up, or you would be working off his debt.”
Tears are falling at this point, I’m so hurt. This is pain because someone thinks they’re so above women, that we are disposable and can be used and hurt. Those little kids are going through God knows what, and this happened right under our noses the whole time.
I sniff, clenching my eyes shut tighter to stop the tears. Ronny pulls back to look at my face. “Why do people do this, Ronny? I have tried so hard to better my life and deal with the pain that has been afflicted to me. I’m trying to be happy with you, starting our life together, and someone always wants to take things from me.”
I shouldn’t be telling him my thoughts right now, but this has truly hurt me, because if Ronny wasn’t there, I would be in a horrible situation—again.
But the most hurtful thing is those kids. We are meant to protect them, and they trusted us to take care of them while in their most vulnerable moments of their lives.
They have either lost their parents or have been hurt by them. Their whole lives were uprooted, and now, they may be lost forever.
“Were the kids girls?” I choke out.
He growls loudly. “Yes. Twelve to sixteen years old.”
I break out of Ronny’s arms, trying not to have a panic attack, though the feeling is bubbling up in my stomach to suffocate me.
My heart is beating so hard.
“I’m so fucking sorry, angel, I hate that this is hurting you so much. I would take the pain over and over again if I could.” Ronny holds me from behind, while I’m facing the spray in an attempt to calm myself.
I haven’t had a panic attack in a long time, but I’m not sure I can fight this one. I swallow hard, trying to speak.
All I can picture is these girls being hurt or raped—or even worse, tortured.
“We have to find those girls,” I manage to say minutes later as the panic attack starts to slip away and I can face Ronny.
His name is the only one I can say, filled with pain and rage. “Elliot is dead?” I ask him, my voice rough from all the crying.
He smirks. “Oh, trust me, he is dead.”
I feel like I can breathe a little easier. He deserved to die, because what he has done is unforgivable.
“Tell me what you have done to him,” I urge, wanting to know he suffered, but I know no matter what it won’t ever be enough.
Ronny’s eyes widen. “Darlin’, I don’t want this shit to touch you. You’re an angel, you don’t need this.”
“Tell me something.”
He sighs and grabs the bodywash, pouring it on my bath pouf and rubbing it down my body. “He touched your ankle, so I made sure he could never use that hand again—I cut it off.”
Holy shit.
Heat rushes through my body, though it’s not in fear. It’s the feeling of wanting to take his cock deep inside of me.
“What’s that look?” He tilts my head back roughly, running his finger over my bottom lip.
My fingers slowly drift down his side to his dick, then I wrap my hand around it, running my thumb over the tip.
“It turns me on knowing the lengths you would go to, to protect me,” I confess, my voice breathless. I bite my bottom lip, wanting to climb him like a tree and sink down on him.
“Oh yeah?” he says, his voice darker, and I clench, imagining him inside of me. His voice making me ache even more.
“Yes,” I moan, and he takes mercy on me. Ronny lifts me up and I wrap my legs around his waist. Not a second to waste before he’s buried to the hilt.
I throw my head back, loving this and loving him.
My nails make marks down his back, and he lifts my hips and brings me back down on him over and over.
My teeth make indentions on his shoulder to keep the scream from bursting out of me and waking everyone in the house.
I barely last seconds, my legs jerking, my back arched as I hold on to him as best I can so I don’t fall and hit the shower floor.
A few moments later, he comes hard, filling me and making sure he is buried all the way inside of me so he doesn’t waste a drop.
“I think that was the one to get you knocked up,” he says a few moments later, and I bust out laughing, feeling much better and lighter, even if it feels like outside of this house the world seems like it’s going to shit
“I believe it was the one,” I joke back with him. I lean back to kiss his delicious lips.
“We better keep practicing, just in case.” He winks at me and sets me down, and we both clean up then go to the bedroom to check on Madeline whose eyes are starting to flutter open.
She lets out a little yawn, a tiny smile on her face. “Come here, my angel.” Ronny lifts her out of her bed, kissing her cheek. “Are you getting hungry?” he talks to her softly.
I grab her bottle and add formula to it before shaking it up for Ronny, then I climb in bed next to them.
He has her lying on his knees with him looking down at her. “How can someone ever hurt a baby or neglect one?” I ask really no one because there is no answer for that.
“I’m not sure, baby. I would do anything to make sure Madeline had everything she needs or wants. I would fucking destroy anyone that dared to harm you both.”
God, when he says stuff like that, he wrecks me.
“You girls are my whole entire world and I would burn everything down to make sure nothing touched you.”’
Fuck me.
My nose burns from the tears I’m trying hard to fight back, but it’s futile. I lean my hand on his shoulder. “I love you too, Ronny, so much.”
I hand him the bottle and he expertly feeds Madeline, her little eyes drifting closed within a minute. I feel the bottom of her diaper to see if she peed and it’s still dry.
He leans over the bed and sets her in her basinet, making sure to drag it closer to the bed so he can reach her easily during the night. Then Ronny pulls me under the blankets and holds me tight. I’m lying half on my stomach and half on my side, with his leg thrown over mine and his face buried in my hair.
“Good night, Ronny. I love you,” I tell him through a yawn, closing my eyes.
“I love you, angel.”
* * *
The next morning, I wake up before Ronny for the first time, and Madeline is starting to get angry, so I take her from her bed, allowing Ronny to sleep in as long as he wants.
Every time she made a noise throughout the night, he jumped up. I know he is still on edge from everything that he learned last night.
I gently shut the door and make my way to the stairs when the door that Trixie and Carter are behind opens. “I thought I heard you up,” Trixie says happily like she wasn’t drunk off her rocker last night.
Carter is dressed in his jeans still, but he has taken his shirt off. I turn away, not wanting to look at those abs because, holy hell, but my Ronny is hotter, no one can top him.
Carter is a member of the Devil Souls MC and he has been the MMA world champion for the last five years on a roll.
“Sorry for crashing on you last night,” Trixie tells me.
“Don’t sweat it, you can stay here as long as you want,” I reply, and she walks over, hugging me before looking down at Madeline. “God, she is such a beautiful baby.”
“She is. And she’s ready for her bottle and a change.” I take her down the stairs with them following me.
I get her changed and into a fresh outfit. “Does anyone want to hold her while I fix her bottle?”
Carter holds out his hands and he takes her from me, moving to the couch. Trixie looks like her feet are barely touching the ground as she follows after him.
I don’t care who you are, nothing makes a man look better than being soft and caring toward a baby, especially the ones that are tattooed and look scary.
She sits down next to him. “I think I want one,” she states.
Carter winks at me and then turns to her. “We can start tonight.”
Her face shows her shock at his words, and I can see she tries to speak a few times but her words come out making no sense. Holy shit, he has left her speechless. I don’t think I have ever seen that before.
I take the prepared bottle, handing it to Carter who feeds her while Trixie looks like her brain is fried. Her hair is still completely sticking up on one side, her shirt is hanging off her shoulder, and she still has sleep marks on her face from the pillow she slept on.
But the thing about Trixie is, she is utterly gorgeous, she doesn’t have to try and it’s totally unfair. She jokes a lot but her heart is one of the best, I would love for her to be happy.
She is an RN, but she travels all over to trauma victims to conduct examinations involving sexual assault and rape kits. She specializes in it, and it tears her up when she does them but her personality and how happy she is makes the process easier on the victims.
I even asked her once that if it hurts her so bad, why does she do it? She told me someone has to because no matter what, what she is feeling is nothing compared to the victims’ trauma.
It’s like me and my foster kids, it was hard and it hurt to see so many of them the way they were living, but nothing I feel can compare to their feelings.
Quitting is something I want to do even more now, as Elliot kind of ruined it further for me. I don’t have the fire in my stomach for it like I did when I first started.
I just want to be a mom to Madeline and be happy. One day I know I will go back, but right now my heart isn’t in it.
I ordered breakfast from one of the restaurants in town because I’m not feeling up to cooking, plus I didn’t want the smell to wake Ronny as I cooked.
Carter and Trixie are in their own world as I sit on the couch opposite them, when I hear a door open upstairs.
I get butterflies as I wait for him to walk down the stairs like how I felt when I first saw him.
Ronny is shirtless, only in a pair of sweatpants, and I fight back the moan at seeing his amazing body, his face soft from sleep.
He leans over the back of the couch, kissing me sweetly on the lips. I smile against them. “I wanted you to sleep in.” I catch his hand, dragging him around the couch to sit beside me.
He lifts me before settling me in his lap sideways with my legs on the couch cushions.
“Have you heard from anyone yet this morning?” Carter asks as he passes the baby off to Trixie who cuddles her to her shoulder.
I love that my girl has so many people that love her so much; she went from sleeping in that dog bed to a whole new life full of love.
I can’t fathom the thought of her going without or what would have happened to her if we didn’t intervene.
Ronny runs his hand down my arm, and I lay my head on his shoulder, feeling sad thinking about what happened—well, what Elliot has done.
He has ruined so many people’s lives with his selfishness. “No, I checked my phone and I know that they will be getting the Devil Souls MC involved too, because you guys were attacked last night also.”
“Yeah, I thought so. As if we will not stick our noses in this after what we learned,” Carter says, and Trixie looks confused.
“What happened?” she asks, and I can’t bear to hear about it all over again.
I clear my throat. “I think I’m going to go wash Madeline’s bottles and clean the kitchen.” I hurry out of the room, trying not to let it all get to me like it did last night.
* * *
Ronny
She leaves the room and it takes every part of me to not run after her, carry her off, and protect her from this shitty world.
Trixie watches her leave. “What happened? She okay?” she asks.
I sigh, sitting forward, running my hands over my face. If Olivia hurts, it hurts me ten times worse.
“She is having a hard time with what Elliot has done, what he dragged her into,” I confess to them, but not wanting to reveal anything more.
“Carter can explain,” I tell Trixie.
I find Olivia leaning over the sink with her hands braced on the edge, her head bowed down.
“Angel,” I call softly, not wanting to startle her.
She turns to look at me, her eyes glistening, and she swallows hard. She is fighting tears, and it fucking destroys me to my soul.
“My girl, please don’t let it hurt you. It’s not something you could have stopped,” I plead with her. I would do anything to stop her from the pain she is feeling.
“I’m not sure why I’m so upset, but I can’t stop thinking about those kids and what might be happening to all of them right now.” She rubs her chest, right over her heart. “I just think of how scared they are, whether someone is hurting them.”
I pull her to me, holding her head to my chest. Right now, I wish I could kill someone because then I could stop the thing that is hurting her, but this is something I can’t fix until we get those kids.
“Baby, you’re breaking my heart.” She sniffs, her hands clutching my back.
It hits me in this moment. She is sad and hurt by everything, but this is bringing back a lot of old feelings with her PTSD.
“Baby, do you think this has made your PTSD flare up?” I ask.
She holds completely still for a moment like the idea didn’t come to her. “I think that might be the reason for the panic attack.” She leans back, but I stop her from going too far, not wanting her away from me.
A tear rolls down her cheek, dripping off her chin and to the floor. I dry the rest of her tears. “You are so fucking strong, and I love the fact that you care so deeply for people. We will get those kids and we will make sure they get all the care they need.”
She lets out a shaky breath, nodding at my words. “You’re right, my tears aren’t going to change a thing, and I know that you will find them.”
I will find them if it’s the last thing I fucking do, and I’m going to plant a bullet in every fucker there that took those kids.