Chapter Nineteen #2
“Sure, that’d be great. I’m holding a lot of tension.”
No shit.
We walk down the hallway to the recovery room and continue talking. Turns out Cody’s from British Columbia; his parents run a fruit tree farm in the Fraser Valley and he’s a country boy like me. Since graduating, he’s worked for various professional sports teams in Vancouver.
“I’ve lived in the country and in the city, and I love both, but something about the Big Apple hits different,” he explains. “The energy in New York is ten times more frenetic than Vancouver.”
“So, it’s not just me, then?” I quip. “I’m from a farming community outside Omaha and I went to college in small-town Vermont, so this is a huge shift for me. I told Sel when I first arrived here how freaked out I was. Still am sometimes.”
“I’d be happy to give you a tour of some of my fave neighborhoods if you want?”
“I might take you up on that. Apart from a few bakeries and coffee shops, I’ve barely spent any time exploring. I think I’ve seen more on the road than I have here. But it’s been awesome to travel. Seattle was one of my favourite spots.”
I’m not thinking about the city but the time I spent with Sel, and I feel a blush creeping up my cheeks.
I clear my throat. “I can’t wait to play Vancouver and take a tour. It seems like a cool place.”
“It is. I miss it, but this job offer was too good to resist.”
I hear footsteps and look over to see Sel walking towards us wearing a Rush tank top, matching shorts—why are they so tight?—and running shoes.
“Headed to the gym?” I call out.
Ask the obvious question, Finn.
“Yep.” He offers a smile. “Where are you two going?”
“Massage time for Finn. He’s stiff,” Cody replies and turns to me. “Think about my offer.”
“I will.”
Sel glances at Cody, then back at me. Sel’s expression is closed off, like it was in practice. I’m confused. Is this for show again?
“Meantime, I’m going to get the table ready. See you in a few, Finn,” Cody says, then offers a nod to Sel and walks off.
Only, as soon as Cody’s out of sight, Sel leans back against the wall, crosses his arms, and clenches his jaw. Those deep-set eyes flare again, and it’s all aimed at me.
“You two are chummy,” he grumbles.
“He’s a great guy. Easy to talk to.”
“What was his offer?” Sel asks, only now he’s looking down at the floor.
“Oh, to uh, show me around the city.”
Sel’s head snaps up.
“I haven’t taken much of my time off to do that,” I continue, and Sel’s intense stare is starting to make me sweat. “Not that we’ve had a lot of time off, but still, it was nice of him to offer.”
“A tour guide?” Sel huffs and shakes his head. “Right. He was flirting with you, Finn.”
I laugh at his suggestion. “You need to hydrate; you’re clearly imagining things.”
“I know flirting when I see it.”
No one’s around in the hallway, so I take a chance and step up close to Sel.
“He’s a professional. He’s not gonna risk his job here—which he loves—by trying to hook up with a player.”
“Why not? We’re doing the same.”
“That’s different.”
“How?”
“With you, it’s more than—”
Flirting. Sex. Just say the words.
But if Sel doesn’t feel the same…
“Remember that first day I stopped by your place?” I ask. “Was Cody flirting with you when he gave you a massage?”
“Of course not.”
I cross my arms. “The way he was smiling at you, I thought maybe you and he had—”
“He’s just friendly that way.”
I stare at him and shake my head.
“Okay, you made your point.” Sel sighs and rubs a hand over his head. “Sorry. Jesus, I’m acting like a jerk. I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”
I don’t know either. I find it difficult to believe that Sel is jealous.
“Cody knows I’m new to big city life,” I add. “And I have limited time.”
Sel mumbles something under his breath, but I don’t catch it. I try to lighten the moment and give him a teasing grin. Looking around, no one in sight, I take a chance and lean in, my mouth brushing Sel’s ear.
“How about you volunteer to be my personal guide?”
“Finn.”
“You know I want to spend more time with you. For fuck’s sake, you’re the reason I’m stiff,” I whisper. “And it has nothing to do with practice.”
He inhales sharply. It takes every ounce of willpower to stay still when what I really want to do is kiss some sense into him. Instead, I take a few steps back and Sel’s face visibly relaxes.
“I—” Sel starts but pauses when another voice echoes down the hallway.
“Thanks to that vitun idiootti, I’m fucking sore.”
It’s Makela, and when I hear the hum of additional voices, I know he’s not alone. They’re getting closer, just around the corner.
Sel and I are skating a razor-thin line out here and we both know it. He turns and walks away first. I watch him go and head for the recovery room.
Man, I desperately need that massage now.
What was all that about Cody? Is Sel really jealous? Because it sure as fuck sounded that way. I was never concerned when my ex got attention, and she didn’t feel that way about me either. Plus, there was no hiding or sneaking around. It was all so easy, uncomplicated.
Me and Sel? It’s anything but.
“All set?” Cody asks when I step into the office.
No.
“Uh, yeah. Thanks.”
Cody leads to me a private room with the table set up, soft music in the background, and the lights down low. There’s the usual pre-massage rundown of my health history, and once I’m done giving him updates, Cody leaves the room to let me change.
I lie down on the massage table, under a warm sheet, and while it feels awesome, my mind keeps churning. I know it’s risky, but I want to continue seeing Sel. He might think differently given everything he’s been through, not to mention he doesn’t look at sex the same way I do.
Sel could be the best thing to come into my life or he’s leading me to the worst heartbreak ever. Yeah, my heart’s involved, and I think it’s too late to backtrack.
Fuck, what do I…
Knock, knock.
“Is it alright to come in?” Cody asks from the other side of the door.
“Yes,” I reply, then lower my head back into the cushion.
The door opens and footsteps draw near.
“You mentioned in your form that you have tightness in your shoulders, back, and hips,” Cody announces. “How about I start there, and then we can move on to your legs?”
“Works for me.”
I stay quiet after that, willing myself to clear my mind, focusing on the soothing sounds of the music.
Cody’s great at his job; he doesn’t make a lot of conversation but checks in to make sure he’s not pushing too hard and asking if I feel any pain.
My body feels so much better already, but I tense when he gets to my hips.
Did Sel leave marks on me last night? I swear I can still feel his hands gripping me tightly.
He didn’t hold back and I was wild for it.
“You’ve got an odd bruising pattern on your lower back, both side of your hips, does it hurt?”
My cheeks are burning… The ones on my face. Thank fuck I’m lying face down.
Hockey players get bruises and marks all the time. Totally normal.
“Nope,” I mumble. “Fell during training.”
“Oh, okay.”
Cody moves on to my legs and feet and then has me turn over. He finishes up with my arms, shoulders, and neck, and I’m ready to fall asleep. But that doesn’t happen, because the music ends and so does my rest.
“Take your time getting dressed. And take a good soak later with Epsom salts. That should help ease your—” He pauses. “Bruising and stiffness.”
As soon as he leaves, I get up with the sheet wrapped around my waist and walk over to the mirror in the far corner of the room. Turning around, I lower the material to peek at my hips.
OMG.
The pattern of bruises resembles handprints.
There’s no way Cody didn’t know. I drop the sheet further and notice my ass is the same.
Thank fuck he didn’t see those. Then again, what difference does it make?
Cody doesn’t know who left the prints. He’s a medical professional, so he won’t say anything.
Once I’ve changed, I wander out to find Cody at his desk, typing notes on his tablet.
“Feel better?” he asks.
If he suspects my tension, he doesn’t say a word.
“Amazing.”
Amazingly embarrassed.
“Do you want to book another slot?”
“How about after our next game?”
“You got it.”
With a nod, I head into the hallway. Sorensen walks by and offers a wave.
“Hey, Baran, you want a lift back to the building?”
“That’d be great.”
“Makela’s coming to hang out at my place, you know… video games, massive amounts of food. You in?”
I could use some time to wind down. Even if I want to be with Sel, I have no idea where he’s headed after practice. And my phone is silent, no text from him either.
“I’m in.”