Chapter 26 Then
Then
I clutched the colorful bag with tissue paper as I headed to the front door.
Inside the bag was a candle I’d gotten for my birthday last year and hadn’t used yet and a pair of fuzzy socks, same story.
I didn’t remember who’d given me either gift.
I was pretty sure they were from my mom, but I pleaded with the universe that they weren’t from any of my friends.
And if they were, that they wouldn’t remember.
They were great gifts. I loved fuzzy socks and candles.
I just hadn’t gotten around to opening them yet.
I’d driven my own car tonight. Unlike the Halloween party at Harper’s house, this one seemed to be smaller (judging by the number of cars out front) and taking place inside. It made sense. It was December now, and colder.
I knocked on the door. It was opened by a girl I didn’t recognize. Her hair was up in a bun on top of her head and she had bright red lipstick on. She seemed older, maybe college-age.
“Hello! Come in,” she said.
The music was loud and coming from the great room toward the back of the house.
“Thank you,” I said, and stepped inside. “I’m Indy, by the way.”
“Oh hi, I’m Lucy, Madison’s friend.”
I didn’t know who Madison was, so I just nodded.
“Everyone is back here,” she said over her shoulder as she walked away.
I shut and locked the door behind me and followed after her.
“Indy!” Harper yelled when I reached the party. “Welcome!”
“Happy birthday,” I said, holding out my gift.
“Thank you!” She took it and added it to a pile of other gifts on the kitchen table. Then she pulled me by the arm to the island. “Eat!”
“Oh, uh, okay, thank you.” I wasn’t even all that hungry.
She skipped away, rejoining a group on the couch, which consisted of Beau and some people I didn’t know, including the front door girl. Lucy?
Ava and Caroline weren’t here yet.
I loaded a paper plate with some finger food—veggies and ranch, mozzarella sticks, chips—then went to sit down. There wasn’t room on the wraparound couch, so I sat in a nearby velvety green armchair.
Beau gave me a small nod, but nobody else acknowledged me.
I listened to their conversation and found out through context that Madison was Harper’s older sister, visiting from college for the birthday party.
And Lucy was Madison’s friend. They both appeared to be drinking some sort of alcohol.
The other people on the couch went to our school.
I’d seen them around but didn’t know anyone’s name.
I crunched on a carrot stick and let my eyes wander the room.
There was a built-in entertainment center with a large television on one wall.
A bookcase took up the wall behind me. It was a lot of adult books and classics.
There was also a section of children’s literature, authors like Roald Dahl and Beverly Cleary and Judy Blume.
My eyes landed on an entire Agatha Christie section.
This was probably why Harper liked mysteries so much.
I should’ve driven over with Ava and Caroline. Ava had offered to get me but I wanted some alone time in my own car before a night full of people. I told them I’d meet them here. I set my plate on my knees and pulled out my phone to see if they’d texted. They hadn’t.
Are you guys on your way? I’m all alone! I texted.
I thought it was the thread I’d started with just Ava and Caroline earlier, but I realized, too late, it was the group chat that included Beau.
I watched him read the text and then we met eyes for a millisecond before Harper said something to him and he smiled.
Maybe he thought my text was wrong, that I wasn’t here all alone.
After all, it used to be Beau and I who were the closest in the group.
I’d never felt alone when he was with me.
But he wasn’t with me. And I felt more alone than ever.
I wasn’t sure how to fix things with Beau.
I knew he’d put some distance between us because he was waiting for an apology, but I didn’t know how to say sorry when I couldn’t explain why I’d cheated.
Before, I’d been so ready to tell him everything about what was going on at home, but after how he’d been acting toward me lately, how quick he was to basically cut me off, maybe I was wrong to think I could trust him with any sort of secret.
I entered a new name into my phone: Cody. And texted him a message.
You home tonight? I’m at Harper’s birthday at her house. He lived two doors down. Was I trying to create trouble? I really didn’t think I was. I was hoping he’d just text back something like: Yes, come see me.
And I would’ve in that moment. I would’ve carried my plate of food two doors down and kissed him on his porch. Maybe even talked to him. Gotten to know him better. Because I really didn’t know much about him.
My phone buzzed.
It wasn’t Cody. It was Caroline: Not on our way, but soon. Be there in thirty?
I sighed and ate another carrot. The mozzarella sticks were cold, gross, but I ate them anyway. Then I went to look for a trash can for my plate. I found one in an open pantry.
On the way back out, Beau was at the counter filling a plate.
“Hi,” I said.
“I’m surprised you didn’t come with Ava and Caroline.”
“Yeah, I was excited to drive my car. I should’ve come with them. I don’t really know anyone here.”
“Most of them are Harper’s band friends, and a few are from choir.”
“Makes sense.”
“You didn’t have to come,” he said.
I nodded because that sounded an awful lot like You shouldn’t have come.
“The mozzarella sticks are good.” I pointed.
He grabbed several and put them on his plate. I felt smugly satisfied about him eating cold cheese in a couple of minutes.
“You know who Indy is dating?” I heard Harper say loudly behind me. I turned to see her talking to her sister.
Madison must’ve asked who, even though I couldn’t hear it, because Harper said, “Cody. Neighbor Cody.”
Madison laughed, hard. “Not Stoner Cody! Tell me it isn’t so.” She said all this while obviously drunk and clutching a beer can, which felt very ironic to me.
Beau smirked. I wanted to slap him. Maybe an apology wouldn’t be good enough to fix things.
I didn’t need even more complicated feelings right now; I already had enough of those at home. I whirled around and walked out of the room. It felt like a dramatic exit, but my life felt pretty dramatic these days.
“Indy, wait!” I heard Beau say, but I didn’t stop and he didn’t come after me.
I walked outside. The night was cold and I hadn’t brought a jacket, because I wasn’t expecting to spend any length of time outside. Besides, cold was relative. We lived on the central California coast; it wasn’t like it was snowing. It was just a little windy.
I started to walk to my car when I changed my mind. I headed down the sidewalk toward Cody’s house. He hadn’t texted me back, nor had he come over, like I thought he might’ve.
I’d never been to his house, just knew which one it was because Harper had pointed it out one time when we were all driving by.
I wasn’t sure if he was home; there wasn’t a car out front.
I’d only ever seen Cody on a skateboard, though.
Maybe he didn’t have a car. The porch light was on, so I decided to knock on the door.
An older woman answered. She wore a loose-fitting dress and house slippers. Reading glasses hung around her neck. “I don’t want to buy anything,” she said.
“Good thing, because I’m not selling anything. I’m Cody’s friend. Indy?” I wasn’t sure if she’d heard my name before.
“Are you asking me if that’s your name? Because I don’t know.”
“No, sorry, I’m Indy. Is Cody here?”
“He’s not. Probably at his dad’s place. He’s supposed to be here every other weekend, but he does what he wants.”
I’d already figured that out about Cody—that he did what he wanted. “Okay, thanks.”
“I’ll tell him you stopped by, Indy.”
“Thanks,” I said. “I can just text him too.” I patted my pocket.
“If that’s the case, I wonder why you wasted my time.” With those words she shut the door.
She wasn’t wrong. I should’ve just texted again. I headed back down the walkway to the sidewalk. Ava’s car was parked behind mine in front of Harper’s house now. I took a breath of relief, glad my friends had arrived. As I walked toward Harper’s front door again, I heard voices. One was Beau’s.
I took several more steps until he came into view. He stood with the girl who’d answered the door earlier—Lucy. He looked angry, but that seemed to be his default lately. At least when I was around. Before I could register what was happening, they were kissing.
A surprised squeak escaped my mouth and I froze. Then Lucy laughed and ran back inside the house. She had been blocking his view of me but now, with her gone, I was right in his line of sight.
“It’s not what it looked like,” he said. His expression had changed to panic.
“Okay,” I said.
“She wanted to get French fries. She’s drunk. I told her I wouldn’t let her drive drunk. She kissed me. I pushed her away.” He raked his hand through his hair. “She was so drunk. I didn’t want that.”
He seemed shaken up.
“You okay?” I asked.
“Yeah.” He sighed. “Yeah, I’m fine.”
He didn’t seem fine. I softened a bit. “Are you sure? Should I go beat her up? I will.”
He smiled. “I’d like to see that.”
“Jones!” a voice called from down the street, followed by the sound of wheels on sidewalk.
I turned to see Cody skating my way. As he reached me, he hooked an arm around my waist, slowing himself to a stop.
Then he stood behind me, on his board, his chin resting on the top of my head, both hands on my waist now.
“Hi,” I said, putting my hands over his.
“Is that thing attached to your feet?” Beau asked.
“I wish,” Cody said.
Beau’s eyes shot to mine. I knew what he was thinking—that I was too smart for Cody. But that was a snobby thing to think. Cody could’ve been a genius for all we knew. And even if he wasn’t, he seemed like a nice guy.
“I met your mom,” I said to Cody.
“That’s my grandma.”
“Oh, I met your grandma.” I played with his fingers at my waist. Picking them up one at a time and then letting them go.
“Was she grouchy?” he asked.
“Very.”
He laughed. “She makes a killer chocolate chip cookie if you don’t mind a little cigarette ash in the batter.”
“I think I do mind,” I said.
“Then you should probably avoid her cooking.” He jumped off his board. “Can I take you for a walk?”
“Take me for a walk?”
“Step on.” He pointed to his board. I obeyed; then he did just what he said he was going to—took me by the hand, like my arm was a leash, and pulled me along.
I looked back at Beau. He was standing with his arms crossed.
“See you in a bit,” I said.
Only I didn’t see him in a bit. After Cody walked me around the block, I pointed to my car. “I just got it.”
He changed directions until we were standing at the driver’s-side door. He tugged on the handle, but it was locked. I dug my key fob out of my pocket and unlocked the door. He climbed into the passenger seat from the driver’s side and then said, “Let’s get food. I’m hungry.”
I glanced back at Harper’s empty porch, then climbed into my car and drove us to Taco Bell. As we sat in the parking lot eating burritos, Ava texted me.
Where are you?
Food and kissing, I responded before I realized she had texted in the group chat.
Are you coming back??
My chest tightened with guilt. Later.
“I left my backpack at school,” Cody said, pulling my attention away from my screen. “In chemistry. Let’s drive there.”
“To school?” I asked, placing my phone in the cup holder.
“Yeah.”
“You have a homework assignment in there that you need to do or something?” See, he worried about homework too.
He laughed. “No.” But he didn’t tell me what was in there that he needed now.
I started the car anyway and drove to the school. “It’s probably locked,” I said as we made our way to the main doors.
But he bypassed them and headed around the side of the building.
“What are you doing?” I asked, pushing a tree branch out of my way and stepping over a bush to follow him.
“There’s a side window that I keep unlocked.”
“You keep it unlocked?”
Sure enough, he was able to pry open a window. He wiggled his eyebrows at me, then held his hands out in front of him as if he wanted to give me a boost inside. I swallowed down my hesitation and climbed my way into the room.
The school felt eerie at night. The room was dark except for some glowing under-cabinet lights.
I searched the floor for Cody’s backpack, wanting to get out of here as quickly as possible.
He dived through the window behind me with a laugh.
Then he was sitting on a table messing with a Bunsen burner, its flame blue in the darkness.
“Where’s your bag?” I whispered. Now I was searching in earnest, looking under the long countertops and in the corners.
Behind me I heard glass breaking. Cody cursed loudly. I turned to see him standing at the glass-doored supply cupboard, one of the panes now broken.
“Cody! What happened?”
“Oops,” he said. “We better run.”
So we did.