Chapter 5
Roishin
W hen Carl made me hide, I thought I’d been spared from his anger. I don’t know if it was the pain from the procedure or wrecking the car, but he was in a mood. Or maybe he was ready to enact the retribution he’d promised?
I tried everything to avoid it, appease it…
control it. I baked bread. I made the stew recipe his mother made for him.
I didn’t mention the cilice, or his promise to let me remove it.
None of my efforts worked. He blamed me for the pain.
He said vile things about his sister. And he was breaking his promise.
“ I’m done suffering at your hands, Rose . You’re going to suffer now.” After that declaration, Carl came at me with the broom. I blocked it.
I yelled back, “ If you kill me, Beth and her husband will know it was you. They’ll tell the cops, and your parents.”
He growled because he knew I was right. But that didn’t stop his rage. “ I won’t kill you tonight. But you’re going to wish you were dead. I swear it!” Right before he swung again, an alarm started beeping. Carl set the broom in the corner of the kitchen, checked his computer, and told me to hide.
Whoever the huge man on the monitor was, he scared Carl so much that my misery could wait.
That scared me.
The intruder stood at least a hand’s width taller than six feet. I’d heard the nickname “ Bear ” mentioned. It fit. His arms were thicker than my thighs. One fist could probably fell a small tree.
And he was hairy.
The wiry brown hair on his arms matched his beard. There was so much of it you could barely see the tattoos underneath. Both sides of his scalp were shaved, and tattoos coiled around his skull randomly. They even encroached on his face.
Metal piercings glinted at his eyebrow, ears, and lip. More objects were embedded in his beard and hair.
Like his beard, his hair was dark and long.
But he kept it controlled by a thick mess of twists and braids that ran from his forehead to the nape of his neck before trailing down his back in a waterfall of smaller braids, shiny beads, and bits of wood or stone wrapped into the pieces like they’d been trapped there as it grew.
It was wild, like an animal’s.
No , like a feral animal’s mane.
Something shiny glinted at his throat. I tried to see what it was without moving my head to look. But my angle was all wrong. I’d have to move.
Which would be a mistake. One I couldn’t afford to make.
Carl might be evil and cruel, but he wasn’t nearly as strong as the man named Bear .
He’d thrown the couch one-handed.
A whole couch.
It made Carl’s fit with the broom look like… amateur hour. With that strength and that gun, Bear had the will and means to make good on his threat to kill Carl .
And then?
I’d be free, but Beth might die without him alive to donate again.
And I would not risk that. Not until I knew she was getting better.
When Bear talked so casually about killing Carl , I couldn’t help the catch of my breath.
It swamped me with how fragile life was.
How all I’d suffered so far was for naught if Carl’s drug-dealing antics ruined everything.
And as much as I wanted to be at Beth’s house right now, I couldn’t just leave Carl with this man. Not until I was certain that his donated stem cells were enough to kick-start Beth’s recovery.
Then I’d gladly hand Carl over to Bear myself. Maybe even ask for the gun so I could be the one to shoot him.
He deserved it for ruining my life.
Carl’s smarmy voice filled the room. “ If you want her, she’s for sale.”
Not this again.
Bear laughed. “ I’m here, bitching at you for being seen with a cop and shorting the club on profit opportunities, and you think selling me some gash is going to make me forget that you’re putting my club at risk?”
What did he call me?
“ Ah . Then I think we both need a gesture of goodwill,” Carl said calmly.
“ I need you not to be sticking your ass out in front of the cops and freaking out buyers. What the fuck, man? We own you. The only reason you’re where you are right now is because you didn’t attract attention.
” Bear was unhinged. His words spat out at a rapid pace, the Destroyers skull on his vest adding weight to his words.
In contrast, Carl was calm. “ Times change. Maybe profits are down because I’m getting out.”
Bear fired back, “ Times can go fuck themselves. You want out? Buy your way out. And do it without the fucking cops involved, got it? Otherwise , you and I both know that me and my brothers have no problem with losing you, permanently .”
There was weight in the silence that echoed through the house.
I could feel the touch of the Goddess in this moment.
The hair on my skin prickled, electrified.
It burned where the cilice had rubbed me raw.
I almost groaned out loud, but I managed to clear my head and think only about the presence of magic surrounding this place. It hung in the air, waiting…
Bear broke the spell. “ You owe us eight grand. And another eight grand for losing out on one month’s best earnings. Pay me tonight and we’ll wash our hands of you. But we’ll be watching you. In or out, it doesn’t matter. Watching you. Got it? No more cops.”
Carl didn’t hesitate. “ My payment date is in three days. You’ll get your money then. But I have a question, perhaps two. One of your hookers takes in what? Four hundred a night? Maybe even more on a good day, right?”
“ What are you getting at, Carl ?”
He grabbed me by the hair and lifted my head.
“ She’s yours for one month. Do anything you like to her, but I want her alive when you return her.
And don’t go stashing her somewhere she can run away and snitch to the cops.
I need her visible and seen with your club for one month.
That’s all. When the month ends, I’ll buy out any remaining debt and even pay extra for the best earnings you should have had, and we’ll both be done with each other.
“ With the use of her, that’s at least thirty grand in addition to the double payment.
Plus , you’re guaranteed another witness to your club brothers’ indiscretions is silent, and I’ll not have to deal with her insubordination for a month.
That’s more than generous enough. Do we have a deal?
” Carl shook me. I realized this was his way of making me suffer.
A way that wouldn’t trace back to him. He hadn’t changed one bit.
Carl wasn’t selling me for money; he was selling me for time. And in one month, I might know whether his stem cell donation had helped Beth . And in one month, if it didn’t, I’d have to return to Carl and beg him for help. Or , in one month, Beth would be alive and thriving, and I’d be… dead.
Getting me back from this terrible man alive was only a means to an end.
Carl was working a game. One he’d just looped Bear into.
I could walk back into this house without a scratch on me, and Carl would see to it that my dead body washed up somewhere the next morning with all the earmarks of torture.
And since he wasn’t connected to me for over a month?
He’d walk away, free. That’s how he operated.
I needed leverage.
“ I’m not buying her,” Bear said.
“ Of course you’re not. She’s on loan to you as a gesture of goodwill and insurance of that silence you want so much.”
I searched Bear’s face for some hint that he wasn’t worse than Carl . I needed hope. And found none.
His scowl deepened. “ This goodwill? You go to the cops and say, ‘the Destroyers took my woman’ and fuck us. Is that your game?” He pulled out his gun again and pointed it at Carl .
In a voice too calm to be real, Carl slowly spoke, “ You’re not listening.
I need her trained to behave, and quite honestly?
I know you and your club would do a much better job of breaking her than I ever could.
Do whatever you want to her. I don’t care.
I’ll pay sixteen grand to you—not as a buyout—but for teaching her how to be a good slave.
And remember, if she can’t behave, it’s your reputation on the line.
One that’s been a bit…tarnished lately. That’s all this is. ”
“ And between then and now?” Bear prompted.
“ I’ll lie low. No more cops. No rumors. You won’t even know I exist.”
All hope fled. I’d walked right into Carl’s trap. Freely .
“ One month?” Bear asked to clarify.
“ One month. You can return her on All Saint’s Day . Do you know when that is?”
“ I’m not stupid. It’s right after Halloween .”
“ It’s the day to celebrate the martyrs!”
I flinched at Carl’s uncharacteristic volume.
Bear , however, didn’t balk. “… And the dead.”
That pleased Carl . He let go of my hair, then rubbed his hand against his jeans. “ Go with him.”
Was this really happening?
“ She got any clothes or shit?”
Carl laughed. “ She won’t need clothes.”
“ To get her ass where I need to get her, she needs clothes. I’m on my bike tonight. You , Rose or whatever it is, grab enough shit you won’t freeze or get me pulled over. You got one minute. Go !”
I ran to my “room” which was more like a closet than a bedroom. I grabbed what I could and stuffed it into my laptop backpack. I slipped the device into the padded back pocket and stumbled, overwhelmed by the futility of it all.
I ripped off the dress, but couldn’t untie the hair shirt quickly so opted instead to toss a sweatshirt over it. Then jumped into my jeans and my good boots, no time for socks. I stuffed a bra into the side pocket of the pack. The clock in my head was ticking.
From downstairs, Bear yelled out, “ Don’t forget whatever woman shit you need. I ain’t buying tampons!”
I froze.
I hadn’t even thought about all that stuff. My hair products, my makeup, my…
My leverage.
I tore through the bathroom, spilling my products out of their box and only grabbing a handful.
If I wasn’t going to see Carl for one whole month, I’d have time before he killed me for this mess.
As soon as I had enough stuffed in a pocket or two, I reached behind the toilet tank.
Carl had a stash point in this bathroom.
Whenever one of his dealers came for a buy, he’d finish by walking up to this bathroom and hiding the cash in the little hinged hole in the wall.
I pulled out the twin stacks of bills hidden there and shoved them under the spot in my pack where the lining had worn thin.
The padding for the laptop worked away from both sides.
I tore the wrapper bands off the money and flattened the bills out at the bottom of the bag where they were concealed by the half-inch foam.
I’d lost pens, coins, lip pencils, bobby pins, hair ties, and receipts in that gap, swearing each time I’d replace the bag.
But I never had. It was about time the black hole of doom swallowed something else.
The cash I needed to buy my freedom. I ripped off the tape holding my cab fare to my skin, pulled the money out of the Ziplock , and stuffed half into my makeup bag as a decoy, and the other into a package of facial wipes.
I used folded pieces of the tape to secure the ripped hem of the lining so the larger portion of cash couldn’t fall out.
Carl would eventually miss his money. When he did, I’d bargain with it.
And if Beth was better by that point? I’d hand it over and walk away.
Finally free .
Just one more month. I could do this. I’d endured worse.
“ Get your ass down here!”
Bear was much more vocal than Carl . I grabbed what else I could and zipped up the various pockets and swung my pack over my shoulder.
Then scrambled down the stairs to face my new fate.
Whatever the Goddess had planned for me, I’d accept it.
I’d asked for freedom. And I was getting it.
Just delayed by one month. There was always a price for magic.
Nothing was without cost. And everything worked on the world’s timeline, not the individual’s.
And maybe this wasn’t exactly how I envisioned my freedom would start. But I wasn’t about to question the will of the Gods .
Carl stopped me and yanked the pack from my shoulder. “ Not so fast. I gotta make sure you didn’t take anything that wasn’t yours.”
My heart threatened to escape my chest. If he found the money, I’d never be free.
Carl searched through the bag, spilling the loose bottles and tampons onto the floor, shaking out my laptop and my clothes to join the clutter at my feet.
He unzipped my makeup bag and took the cash I’d stuffed there.
Satisfied I hadn’t pilfered anything of his, he tossed the empty backpack at me. “ Clean that shit up.”
I stuffed everything back into its place under both of their watchful eyes. Bear took the bag from me, then Carl groped me. His hand poked at my crotch and squeezed my boobs hard as he made certain I had nothing stuffed down my pants or into my shirt.
His grin as he smoothed along the cilice was awful. His hand paused where the tape residue made the fibers in the fabric dig in worse. He leaned close and whispered, “ Try to keep this. I’ll want you in it when you return.”
Then he shoved me at Bear . “ You’ll love her under garments. They’re custom made.”
The night air was chillier than I had anticipated. I shivered as Bear herded me onto the back of his bike. Carl watched us leave, standing in the doorframe, lit from behind. Almost like a parent bidding their child goodbye. Light bounced off his sinister grin.
Bear fired up the motorcycle, and I grabbed onto his coat to avoid being tossed off by the violent jerk of power as he tore out of Carl’s realm and entered his.
I was truly screwed. Loaned to a biker with less care than a library book gets. I should just let go and roll to my death.
One thing kept me clutching at the dirty black leather coat Bear wore.
It was doubt.
What if Beth didn’t get better? What if I needed Carl to save her again?
If I were dead, no one would be able to con or bargain with him to help.
No pleas for mercy would be heard. That was beyond his ability to care.
Carl only helped himself. I knew this long before I’d approached him for a deal. It was a miracle he’d agreed.
It was an even bigger miracle that he hadn’t demanded more.