Chapter 11
Roishin
I woke before Bear did and moved the table and all the altar paraphernalia out of the way. His running shoes sat outside. They had to be damp with the dew, yet, as filthy as they were, I didn’t blame him for not bringing them inside.
There was a bristle brush under the sink.
It was brand new, never used. Which was a shame.
Tools should be used. I sat down outside, bundled up in a blanket and shivered while I sloughed off the remaining caked mud and grime.
The fancy running shoes would never be pink again, but they were a far cry better than before.
And I needed to atone for my outburst last night.
“ What are you doing to my shoes?”
Bear was dressed in workout sweats and a performance thermal shirt that clung to his chest and abs.
I got slightly distracted by the muscle definition so didn’t answer right away.
Realizing my gaffe, I quickly replied, “ They were dirty. I cleaned them.” I handed the shoe I was working on to him.
The other wasn’t much better, but they’d do.
He looked at them. A sour expression scrunched his face into a grimace. “ I hate pink.”
“ Why did you buy them then?”
“ The salesperson was good.”
“ Really ? You know there’s dye.”
“ Yeah ?”
“ A good leather dye would make them almost any color you want.”
“ Black .”
I smiled. His pants were charcoal, the thermal, black. The bands at his wrists were black, and his piercings varied between silver or black. He definitely wasn’t the pink type.
He snapped his fingers. “ That reminds me, we’re riding today.”
“ Not tomorrow?” I asked.
He froze as he slipped on a shoe. “ What do you mean?”
“ Kate said there’s a ride tomorrow.”
“ Ah , right. There’s a ride today, too. Then church.”
I waited for him to ask me, rather than demand. But it never came.
“ I’ll be back in an hour.” He took off at a light jog, turning right as he hit the T in the path where it intersected with the trail.
Breakfast was ready when he returned. He stopped at the doorway, dumping his shoes outside and inhaled deeply. “ Sausage ?”
“ And eggs, I made biscuits, too.”
He stood there, hovering in the open door.
“ You’re letting the cold in.” I’d finally warmed up. The basement didn’t hold heat well, and I shivered most of the night.
“ Sorry . I … I’m not used to breakfast.”
I stared at his supplements. “ I would understand if you didn’t want to eat my cooking. I can always save your portion for later and maybe make a casserole or something with it.”
A heavy hand dropped onto my shoulder. His body was directly behind me, the heat of it both welcome and not. I tried not to flinch. “ Thank you for cooking for me. I appreciate it.”
My sigh of relief slipped out before I could stop it.
He squeezed my shoulder. “ Bet Carl didn’t appreciate you enough, did he?”
That didn’t need to be answered. The less I heard that name, the saner I felt. “ Please don’t talk about him.”
“ Why ?”
I had the pan of hot food in my hand and had the overwhelming urge to smash it against something. Like his thick head. But I calmly set it down and turned until I wasn’t so close to the stove. “ I do not want a whole month of comparisons. That will get old.”
The blow I’d braced for didn’t come.
Bear slowly nodded, agreeing with me. But then opened his mouth. “ On a scale of one to ten, with Carl being the one and your dream man being a ten. Where do I rank?”
Right now? A two. But that was unfair. He’d done nothing so far to deserve to be lumped so closely with Carl . “ A four. You pulled a gun on me, and a knife.”
“ And if I hadn’t done that?”
“ A seven, maybe?” Maybe an eleven?
He smiled. “ Good . That’s what I needed to know.”
With that, he pulled the plates down and arranged two settings.
I took the side seat, knowing he’d want the short end of the table.
It was all cordial and polite, and yet I wanted to scream.
Rail on Bear for the unjustness of this situation.
I wanted to cry, too. And the more I stewed on that, the greater the urge got.
I barely finished my eggs and half a piece of toast before I couldn’t stand it anymore.
I got up and began washing dishes so I wouldn’t have to think.
“ You gonna eat your sausage?”
I should, but the thought of food made my stomach queasy. “ No .”
A scrape of fork on plate and the rustle of his clothes answered me.
He chewed loudly.
Carl never did that. Carl barely made a sound. At least I knew where Bear was. That was comforting, I told myself.
Even when he finished and brought the plates to me, I heard him.
He stood next to me, handing off the plates and drying the clean dishes before putting them back where they belonged.
A minute into it, he grabbed my arm. I almost dropped the glass I had in my hand.
“ What happened here?” He had twisted my arm to reveal the long black, purple, and green bruise from the broom handle.
“ What do you think?”
He stared at it, not letting go. In fact, his grip got tighter. Not horribly so, but enough that I didn’t dare move.
“ He’s a dead man.”
“ No .”
Bear forcefully inhaled and prepared to berate me for my disobedience.
“ You can’t go around killing people. It’s wrong. And for the one month I’m here, can you just forgive?”
His jaw went to the side. “ Forgiveness is a Christian thing. I don’t have that word in my vocabulary.”
But he let go of my arm and pulled the glass out of my hand to dry it. I studied him. Such a contradiction. A warrior, built for domination. Yet , domestic chores were not beneath him. He didn’t have to prove himself because he truly walked the walk and talked the talk. It was refreshing.
“ I wanted to consecrate some of the things you bought for me yesterday.”
“ When we get back. It will be late. You can do that by moonlight, right?”
“ Do I have to come along?”
“ Yup .”
No explanation, no clues, no politeness. I downgraded my estimation of him. “ I don’t get a say on it?”
“ Nope .” His lips pressed together, almost hidden by his beard. If I didn’t know better, he was trying not to laugh.
At me.
“ Where are we going?”
“ South .”
I counted to ten. “ Where south?”
He chuckled.
“ It’s not funny.”
“ I’m taking you to an old road dog’s house. He’s going to make you an athame. And his wife? She’s going to get you outfitted for riding. If you’re going to be on the back of my bike tomorrow, I need you looking the part.”
At least that wasn’t a one-word answer. “ Was that so hard? And maybe you want to ask next time?”
“ Nope .”
I growled in frustration.
He smiled and took the last plate from my hands and set it in the drying rack. Then he turned me to face him.
“ Roishin Black , I don’t ask. I’m not that kind of a man. And I certainly don’t beg.” His fingers tightened on my hips.
My pulse sped up. I barely tried to breathe because my whole body braced for trauma.
But he smoothed his hands down and loosened his grip. “ I don’t want to scare you, either.”
I took a shaky breath. It didn’t go unnoticed.
“ Riding . I should dress warm, right?”
“ As warm as you can. I’ll bring some of my thermals down for you. But you want to dress in layers for when it gets warmer, okay?”
That was as close to a request as I’d get. “ Understood .”
His jaw shifted. It was his thinking face, and what he was thinking about, he didn’t like. I liked him better for it.
What I didn’t understand was how anyone would enjoy freezing to death on a bone-jarring, butt-numbing torture session across the border to Maryland .
We stopped at an ancient farmhouse set on the edge of an aging subdivision.
Bear parked the motorcycle near the largest barn and yelled out, “ Yo , Fin , where you at?”
A woman stepped out onto the porch and yelled back, “ Stop bellowing you oaf. He’s right there in the barn. Can’t you hear the hammer?”
That’s what that rhythmic clang was. Bear indicated I should get off, but I was stiff from riding and almost fell lifting my leg high enough to clear the seat.
“ Who’s that with you? She looks half frozen and dressed like you slapped her together with duct tape. Don’t you got any sense at all?”
I liked this woman already. Anyone brave enough to berate my captor had my loyalty.
Bear stuck a thumb at me. “ This is Roishin . She’s mine.”
Really now? I glared at him from where I stretched my legs.
“ Then treat her better, you fucking idiot. You , Roishin , get your ass in here, I got something to take the chill off.”
She motioned for me to come in the house.
Before I could, Bear stopped me. “ Don’t let her get you drunk.”
What ?
He didn’t elaborate, instead, locked the bike down and disappeared into the barn where the noise came from.
“ Here .” Betty Jo handed me a warm coffee. Then spread her arm to the left to show me the fixings. Including whiskey. It was before noon.
I opted for cream. “ Thanks . That was a cold ride.”
She nodded, looking at my layers of clothes. I had to resort to almost everything I owned and two of Bear’s thermals. All of that still didn’t keep me from feeling like a popsicle that had been run through a cheese grater.
“ You need some proper shit to wear. You a size six?”
“ Mostly .”
She squinted. “ I’d guess that mostly is your scrawny ass, but you’re a medium up top, right?”
Since she’d nailed it, I just nodded.
“ Cup size?”
“ What ?” I choked on my coffee.
Betty Jo cleared her throat and grabbed my chin.
“ Bear brought you here, half frozen on a bitch of a day to ride wearing practically nothing that would keep the wind from giving you hypothermia. He’s going to pay dearly for that mistake.
I’m going to load you up with at least seven hundred dollars of clothes. You got a problem with that?”
“ No ?” Maybe ? “ I’m not a charity case.”
She laughed hard. “ No , you ain’t, but that doesn’t mean that overgrown idiot doesn’t deserve to fork over some scratch. Cup size?”
“ C .”
She scanned my bulky clothes. “ Thirty -four, right?”