35. Seraphina
35
Seraphina
I stare at him, simultaneously overwhelmed and absorbed in the words that just left his mouth.
“Love?” I repeat, positive I misheard him or imagined the word leaving his mouth.
Lincoln scoffs, rolling his eyes at my surprise. “Of course it’s love, cierń. Would I have gotten fucking roses and thorns for anyone else?” He pushes the sleeve of his Henley up, letting me see the intricate tattoos and markings that decorate his skin. He’s had tattoos covering his body since I met him, and I squint my eyes, trying to find what he’s talking about.
“What do you—? Oh my god.” I startle and reach out to twist his arm for a better look at the small vine twisting his forearm. It’s so delicate, the lines so fine, that it’s almost camouflaged on his skin. But like one of those Highlights “Spot the Difference” pictures, once you see it, you can’t look away.
It becomes obvious.
Glaringly so.
“Lincoln.” My voice is a whisper, just a small breath of sound that seems to hold all the confusion and wonder I feel. I look up at his face, unsurprised to find his green eyes trained on me. “When did you get this?”
He shrugs. “Wolf did it a few years ago.”
Years?
I open my mouth to respond, but no words come out. I shake my head, giving him the only response I seem capable of at the moment. We’ve missed out on years, and it’s sinking in that we didn’t have to.
Lincoln clears his throat. “At the time, I got the tattoo to remind me that roses have thorns. That touching them can fucking hurt like a bitch. Wolf drew blood on one of the spikes to remind me of how fucking painful it was to lose you, even if I never fully had you.”
“Oh.” I deflate, my emotions swirling from excitement to dread at his explanation.
“But then, I realized that this tattoo was just a way to keep you close, make sure I never forget you . Not losing you. Not watching you with some dick who couldn’t tell his ass from his elbow, but just you. I fucking tried, cierń. I tried to move on. I tried with Gemma, but it was my fault we didn’t work out because all I fucking wanted her to be was like you: sweet, determined, a pain in my ass, and the most beautiful goddamn creature I’ve ever seen.
“How the fuck am I supposed to be with someone else when every time I close my eyes, I imagine it’s your hair tickling my chest or the feeling of your hands on me? Your laughter in my ear and those little biting, sarcastic remarks you always make under your breath when everyone thinks you’re the quiet one? It’s not possible. And it’s taken me a long time, but I know that if I can’t have you—can’t be with you—then I don’t want anyone else. Because it’s a cheap imitation of happiness, and I’d rather work myself to death behind the goddamn stove than be with someone to ease my thoughts of you. I don’t know if I believe in love at first sight, if it’s bullshit or real, but what I know is that the moment I saw you in that pretty little pink dress, no one else compared.”
“You can have me.” My response is instant, with no hesitation in my voice. And really, why would there be?
“Be very fucking sure, Seraphina, because the next time I get my hands on you, they’re not leaving. Do you understand?”
I nod my head, bobbing it up and down before Lincoln stops speaking. “Y-yes.”
I anticipate Lincoln to pounce on me the moment I confirm I’m not going anywhere, that I’m his, but he doesn’t. Instead, he surveys me for long, erratic heartbeats. His eyes trail from my face to my neck, down the length of my body, and then back up. There’s no mistaking the heat in his gaze, and I suck in a breath, anticipation thrumming through me as I await his next move or word.
The words don’t come, at least not immediately, but his body starts to move, circling mine. There’s not much floor space in my bedroom, but there’s just enough room for Lincoln to move in a slow orbit around me, almost like he’s the earth and I’m the sun he revolves around.
I feel him stop behind me seconds before his hand reaches out, trailing a single finger up my spine. The assault on my nerves is slow, a trickle of water, and I shiver in the air-conditioning as goosebumps pebble along my skin.
“I’m clean—I was tested after everything went down, but I have a condom in my wallet.”
I shake my head. “It’s been a long time for me, but I’m clean and I have an IUD.” He nods at my words, moving impossibly closer to my body.
“So fucking delicate,” he murmurs, his head descending so that his words fall against my ear. “We’ve missed out on four years, Seraphina. How will you make it up to me?”
“I—”
“No.” He punctuates the word with a bite to my earlobe, a gentle nick that surprises me more than hurts me. “I’ll tell you how you’re going to make it up to me.” His hand moves from my back to under my arm, trailing down until he grips the hem of my T-shirt. Pulling slowly, the rustle of fabric echoes in the room.
“If you’re really mine, mój ma?y cierń , then you’re going to let me claim every part of you. And you? You’re going to claim every part of me.”
I swallow, keeping my eyes peeled to the mirror in front of us as he works the fabric up my torso, over my head, until finally, it falls and lands in a silent thud on the floor. Lincoln hums in approval as my bare chest is revealed, using both hands to trail up my sides, over my ribs, and stopping at the underside of my breasts before his hands fall away.
He doesn’t say anything as he steps back. His eyes roam over my body quickly, gaze lit and assessing as he takes in my slight frame and barely there breasts. Self-consciousness and envy hit me. How many beautiful women has he seen? How many women with curves and bigger breasts, long legs and confidence? It’s hypocritical of me, but jealousy stabs me in the chest, and I look down, moving my gaze from his face.
“They’ve always been you, cierń. Doesn’t make it any fucking better, but in my head, it’s always been you I’m undressing. Now that it really is you, don’t hide from me.”
“Sorry,” I whisper, meeting his eyes again in the mirror. “We’ve both dated other people. It’s just—”
“I don’t want to hear about other fucking people, Seraphina. It’s you and me, okay?” I nod, both agreeing with his words and giving him permission to continue his assessment.
I’m completely naked, bared to Lincoln’s gaze, and he’s still clothed, Henley and shorts hanging from his frame. With someone else—anyone else—this would be a power imbalance. But with Lincoln’s eyes roving over my body and his hands hovering over my skin, almost like he’s dying to touch me but is holding himself back, I feel powerful.
“You’re so goddamn beautiful.” Lincoln’s voice is low, a note of reverence in his tone. I watch as his hands approach my bare skin, sucking in a breath when contact is finally made. They rest on my stomach for a moment before one trails up while the other moves lower. His right hand makes a slow descent, not stopping until he cups me between my thighs.
“Is this mine, Seraphina?” I nod, but he tsks, lightly flexing his fingers against me. “Words, cierń.”
“Yes,” I breathe out.
His other hand rests between my breasts, fanning out so that his thumb and pinky rest just under the slight swell. “And these, are they mine?”
“Y-yes,” I stutter.
The hand on my chest moves higher, grazing over my nipple in a touch so delicate that, technically, I barely feel it. Except I feel it everywhere. My eyes flutter shut, and I can’t hold back the shudder that grips my body.
“Eyes on me, Seraphina.” My eyes snap open, instinctively giving in to his command. “There’s my girl.”
His hand stops above my left breast, lying flat against my chest and absorbing the unsteady heartbeats. “And this? Is it mine, Seraphina?”
I nod, tears welling in my eyes. “Always.”
His hand moves higher, settling at my throat and gripping it lightly. “That’s right, cierń. Your heart is fucking mine. Your body is mine. Every inhale, every exhale, is mine.” He punctuates his words while squeezing my throat, not enough to cut off my airflow, but enough to let me know he can. “And everything I am, everything I have is yours. I love you. I’ve loved you since you were eighteen. I’m not going to stop loving you. Now, tell me.”
I know what he wants to hear, the three words he’s demanding. It’s not that I don’t feel them—I feel them so acutely my body is burning. I’ve just never said them to a man before. Swallowing the last of my hesitation, I focus on his bright eyes. “I want you.”
“That’s right. You fucking want me .” Without warning, the hand between my legs shifts. His fingers dive into my wetness, and his palm presses against my clit.
“Oh,” I choke out, my hips pressing backward into his thighs.
“Your cum is mine too. Every fucking piece of you.” The hand at my throat moves under my chin, tilting my head back so that I’m looking into his face. “And these goddamn lips.” It’s the only warning he provides before he captures my mouth, giving me barely a second to prepare. But that second is all I need.
I open for him, meeting his tongue as he invades, staking his claim on my soul as his fingers play my body. He works his hand in time to the tangle of our tongues, and before I know what’s happening, an orgasm slams into me, and I break the kiss, crying out against his mouth.
“That was fucking mine,” Lincoln growls, sealing our lips together once more. He sucks me in, taking every breath I have and swallowing my cries as my body convulses against him. He doesn’t move his mouth until my body stills, giving me one final kiss before straightening and releasing his hold on me. “Get on the bed, Seraphina.”
I follow his command, partly because I know it’ll please him but mostly because I know I’m about to receive more pleasure from him. I walk slowly, not running to the center of my bed like I want to, and sit on the comforter, legs together and back straight.
Lincoln stalks over to me, his eyes trained on my face as he stops inches from my legs. “Open, cierń.” Another command, another show of compliance as I loosen my posture and draw my legs apart. Lincoln sinks down before me, putting our faces level with one another. I jolt in surprise as his hands land on my ankles, his grip light but unexpected.
“You need to get used to my touch, cierń. It’s not going anywhere.” He drags his hands up my ankles, over my calves, and to my knees, pressing gently as he widens my legs, giving him more room between my thighs.
He doesn’t stop moving his hands up my legs, keeping his eyes trained on my face until his fingers rest just below my hips. It’s only then, when his fingers and palms have surveyed every inch of my legs, that he looks down, and I swear, the sound tearing from his throat can only be described as animalistic. My stomach clenches at the noise, forcing a whimper from my own mouth.
“Fucking stunning,” he mutters more to himself than me. His fingers spread on my thighs, putting his thumbs right beside my lips. I expect him to tease me, to keep me on the brink until he’s ready for more. But with Lincoln, I should know that he never follows my expectations.
He’s so much more.
His hands move from my thighs to my ass, squeezing me before he pulls my lower body up and brings his head down, giving my slit a long, slow lick that sends me off balance. I fall backward from the sudden move. “Lincoln,” I rasp, my hands falling to his wrists.
“Quiet, Seraphina. I’m eating.” His mouth moves against me, speaking directly into my pussy, before he captures my clit and bites down lightly, giving me just enough pain to know it’s a reprimand for interrupting him.
“Oh.” I breathe as his teeth release me, and his lips suck, soothing the bite. His fingers squeeze me, bringing me impossibly closer to his mouth as his lips move lower, trailing wet kisses down my slit.
Lincoln’s tongue darts out, licking me between kisses, and I can’t help the moan that escapes me when his tongue spears into me, moving slowly in and out as though he has all the time in the world.
“Lincoln,” I groan out, arching my back and pressing my body against his face. “Yes, don’t stop, please. More,” I whine, thrashing my head as his tongue continues to fuck me unhurriedly. I start to move my hips, grinding against him in an attempt to gain more friction. Lincoln hums against me, moving his tongue out to recapture my clit in a hard suck.
“Please. Please. Please,” I repeat, undulating faster, more wildly. I’ve never been vocal during sex, always thinking that the sounds were disingenuous and unnecessary. But with Lincoln, I can’t contain myself, can’t stop from asking for what I need to push myself over the edge.
“Your fingers, Lincoln. Please,” I beg.
Lincoln’s fingers flex just before he rips his mouth from my sensitive flesh. “It’s so fucking sexy when you tell me what you want.” He leans in for another lick, sucking my lips gently before a soft bite has me twisting in his hold.
I don’t realize one hand releases my cheek until one long, thick finger enters me. “That what you need, cierń?” He thrusts shallowly, barely pulling out until… “Is one finger all you need, pretty girl, or do you want more?”
“More.”
“That’s right, you’ll always want fucking more. More of me. More of my mouth, my fingers. And my cock. How do you think it will feel when I’m finally inside you, fucking you like we’ve both dreamed these last four goddamn years?” He adds a second finger, stretching me out as he continues his shallow thrusts. “You think after all this time, I’m going to have you come only on my fingers? Fuck that, Seraphina.” He withdraws abruptly, dropping his other hand from my ass and pushing to his feet.
Wide-eyed, I watch him suck his fingers into his mouth, cleaning the wetness coating his hand before he grips the bottom of his shirt and pulls it off, revealing his expanse of tattoos and a dusting of dark hair. He shoves his shorts and boxers down next, not hesitating to stand before me as naked and vulnerable as I am.
My mouth waters at the sight of him. His dark skin is decorated with tattoos, talismans and stories of his life. I work my eyes down, taking in the chest hair that shouldn’t be so sexy but is, and the hair leading to his dark, uncircumcised cock. He’s not a monster, not some fabled ten-inch dick that that will split me in half. The slight upward bend in his averaged-size cock makes me bite down on my lip, knowing that the orgasm he’ll deliver will be intense. I’ve never been with a man uncut, and while I’m sure there’s no difference in feeling, knowing that Lincoln will be my first is intense.
“If you keep looking at my dick like that, I’m going to come before I get inside you.”
“Sorry,” I respond automatically, unable to tear my gaze away. Lincoln’s dark chuckle fills the room.
“Don’t apologize for staring at my dick, cierń.” He steps out of the circle of his shorts as he speaks, moving forward until he’s beside me and climbing onto the bed. He makes his way into the center before reaching over to me and lifting me up and onto his lap, letting me straddle his stomach while his erection presses into my ass.
“I want you to ride me, Seraphina. I want to feel that cunt take me and fuck me until you’re squirting all over me and soaking this goddamn bed.” My core clenches at his filthy words, and I shift against him, sucking in air as my clit drags against his abdomen. “Fuck, Ser.” Lincoln’s hands shoot out, grabbing my throat and pulling my face down to his for a quick, messy kiss. There’s nothing artful about it; it’s raw and sloppy and delicious.
Pulling my face away, he releases my neck and slaps my ass, thrusting upward as he does. “Ride me. Now.”
Sitting up, I bite down on my lip as I lift my hips, positioning myself just over Lincoln’s cock. With one hand, I reach between my legs and grab him, stroking the surprisingly soft skin before I move his head between my lips.
Moving my hand back to his chest, I sink down slowly, eyes closing as Lincoln fills me up inch by inch.
“Fuck.” He groans beneath me, hands flexing against my waist. “So fucking good. I fucking knew it.”
I don’t breathe until our groins are pressed together, his cock buried so deep inside of me, I feel him pressing against my G-spot. I shift my hips, pushing forward and backward as I grind on top of him, working myself over his cock. I start cautiously, but the more I move, the wetter I become and the more frantic my movements are. My fingers flex against him, and I throw my head back, squeezing my eyes shut as I concentrate on the feel of Lincoln inside me.
He releases my hips, giving me free rein over his body. I look down, about to complain about his lack of touch, when his rough hands grip my chest, pushing my boobs together before his middle and pointer fingers squeeze my nipples like clamps, giving me a delicious slice of pain mixed with pleasure.
“You going to come for me, baby? Show me how fucking much you missed me?”
“Mhmm,” I mutter, words escaping my mind.
“That’s right, grind your cunt against me. You’re so fucking wet. Give it to me, Seraphina. Show me that it’s only me. Only fucking me, baby. Come on my cock.” His fingers tighten against my nipples, and the combination of his words, the pain, and the feel of his cock inside of me, hitting just the right spot, has my orgasm slamming into me.
“Fuck, I feel your pussy around me, fucking strangling me. Goddamn, cierń.”
I bear down on him, halting my movements and breathing heavily as the orgasm barrels through me. “Lincoln, I—”
Lincoln presses up, cutting me off without words, and lifts me from his cock. In a skilled move, he turns my body, placing me on my side facing away from him, and presses his chest against my back. Need, a feeling I thought would have been satiated after two orgasms, consumes me as he lifts my leg and drapes it over his hip. One arm snakes under my head, allowing his hand to wrap around my neck once more while the other cups me right over my clit.
“It’s my turn, Seraphina. And if you’re a good girl, I might just let you come again.” He speaks into my ear, biting down on my earlobe at the same time he thrusts into me, filling me up in one stroke.